The silent treatment

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The silent treatment
by dawgpaws at 2/20/2013 9:08:03 PM

With the number of jerks one runs into online it is interesting to note that a new study has shown what some of us have long suspected - using ostracism (the silent treatment) works better for those of us enduring badly behaved people.

"The silent treatment is the best way to go when dealing with jerks, a New York-based study finds.

According to researchers at Baruch College, City University of New York, it's more mentally healthy to abruptly end a conversation with someone obnoxious than to continue speaking with them.

"It's depleting to force yourself to have difficult conversations when all you want to do is ignore the person," lead author Kristin Sommer, associate professor of psychology at Baruch College in New York, told Canadian wire service Postmedia news. "Ostracism can serve the regulatory goal of allowing people to conserve resources."

Hard as it may be, sometimes the best thing to do is just hit that delete button more often. Don't bother responding and raising your blood pressure. Delete, block, flag, walk away. Amazingly enough, in closed systems ostracism works well to control behavior. It would be interesting to see if enough people here could be convinced to do it to make a difference.

Comments
k_4real	2/20/2013 9:10:47 PM I am definitely an advocate of the silent treatment, and I have used it successfully in the past. Lol.
lbdays	2/20/2013 9:26:53 PM You are so right, sometimes is better to say nothing at all. I can't tell you how many post I made and deleted and never sent.
lessiesgirl	2/20/2013 10:10:29 PM Have used it and it works.
kayterry	2/20/2013 11:23:33 PM It's a great punishment, drives most people nuts.
earldirt	2/20/2013 11:46:14 PM Why carry on with someone you can't communicate with??..it's pointless!!
adagio888	2/21/2013 3:14:03 AM They should have an ignore button like the one on my phone...
elvissongs	2/21/2013 4:42:06 AM I've used it on here Marsha and when folks continually come into my blogs making inappropriate statements. But takes alot push me hit block/delete and I never start it but I end it with a block shot You probably don't know is we have some on here who make up other profiles on different IP address to read what others have said that they blocked. Them folks need some psychiatric help
charli2858	2/21/2013 5:27:09 AM Works based on my experience, maybe someday users will realize ignoring is a smart thing in stead of calling each other rude.... it is conserving resources, especially the mental kind!
calypso012	2/21/2013 5:39:35 AM I haven't had to use the block button yet, although, I admit to flagging a couple of extreme posts. In my 'real-time' life I refuse to argue. If we are too heated to have a rational conversation, then we will separate, calm down and talk at another time. On line, it proves to be a bit more difficult for me, especially when people are so dadgum rude, but I am sure the block button and I are going to become friends before long. How does one know they are blocked? Is there a way to see who has blocked you?
glassslipper442	2/21/2013 4:19:28 PM Elvis - I've never heard of a block shot. I totally agree with the principle. If we keep replying to certain postings, it will act as a positive reinforcement. Whereas a silent treatment is something else - not sure of negative reinforcement though... my psychology skills are a bit rusty. Will try to exercise it. Although sometimes it's kind of difficult to resist the temptation. My profile is set to invisible though, so they can't pay a visit
dawgpaws online now!	2/21/2013 4:28:28 PM Hi Harry, Yeah, I know that there are some who do the different profile thing. Those are the ones whom I'd gladly feed the Haldol to if I could get ahold of them. Mostly I delete, but now and then I get testy and respond - and then, well sigh. I learn my lesson and delete until they shut up and go away - or occasionally get tired of having to delete more often than in a FIDO flame war and block.