Help me save him from HEAVEN Con't.

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Help me save him from HEAVEN Con't.
by eggharborfly at 12/23/2008 7:06:22 PM

Six o'clock in the morning he was shaking mom. Bad. You must have seen from above. I covered him with two down blankets and turned the portable heater on for him in addition to the heat already warming the house. I thought he was okay. He cired himself to sleep and once I knew he was 100 percent asleep, I went and fell alseep on the couch.

Then what happened? Was he getting the itch? I remember him waking me up and saying that he was leaving to head home. I told him to remember what we talked about (the drinking) and told him I still will always care about HIM. Everyone knows that doesn't go away after knowing each other since for sixteen years, even though we just got through the court charges of him pulling the knife on me, I will be there to help him.

I thought he was okay moms. I am sorry that I didn't know what was about to happen. MOMS, why? GOD, why? How much more am I to take? Why is it one thing after the other?

All I remember is the loud banging on the door. I jumped up to answer and Davy came run out the room. It was Dave yelling that Sean was just rushed to the ER. WHY? What the hell, I can't take anymore of this shit. I thought it was some sick joke until I opened the door and realized how serious it was when I saw Dave had blood all over him. I remember him saying, "Tracey, hurry, they rushed Sean to ER because he was walking to go into the bar and went into a seizure and cracked his head open on the cement.

How the hell was he just here two minutes ago saying goodbye and then just being away from the house six blocks did something go wrong? I rushed out the door in pajamas in all. I could not help thinking on the way to the ER that this just could not be happening. We just made it through this horrible day saying goodbye to you. I began quizzing Dave. How bad is this before I see him. He tried to prep me. I was told he was bad moms, but didn't know how bad. I began feeling angry. Not only angry that I was rushing to be by someone else's side in the hospital, but that this happened in the parking lot of the bar he was getting ready to go drink in. Was it you moms? Were you stopping him? Was it your way of bringing us together again since he left? Was it from the accident we got in where he hit his head when we got slammed into leaving the funeral that caused him to have a seizure? What is going on? Was it because he was with Dave who you did not like?

Well moms. I need your help from above now. The doctor put staples in head and then spoke to me. Moms, he is having seizures caused by alcohol. I warned him of this moms did I not? Did you not? Now your gone and he can't be alone. So, once again, he is back at my house moms. This is hard for me and not at all what I need right now moms. I am dealing with the loss of Jeff you know that. You know that I also told your son that I was done with him because of his drinking. Yes, I allowed him to stay the night of your funeral moms, but that was a given. Who can expect someone to be alone after burying their mother. Especially him, mama's boy!

So the doctor told me moms that he could experience a couple more of these seizures. MOMS, I need your help. Don't let him have anymore. I will not be able to bear witness to it. Davy can't witness that moms. I asked the emergency room doctor what am I going to do with him? He has no doctor, no insurance, and they don't do detox through the hospital anymore and now it is Christmas. So, the only thing I could talk the doctor into doing was to put him on meds to help with the tremors and sedate him. Moms, they were not even able to prescribe him Camprals or any meds that normally get prescribed to Alocoholics going through withdrawal. They released him to my care. Me moms? No one else in the family could or would help. ME? I have been through too much as it is. I got myself and Davy now to take care of who is sick with the flu. Me? The one who hasn't made it through the last few weeks with the loss of Jeff so I have continously broke down. Whatever!

I pray that you help me get him through this. He is trying. I have him sleeping in my room with all the covers over him, but I am scared moms. The tremors won't stop. I go in there every twenty minutes fearing opening the door to see his condition. I need your help from above now moms. He is still your baby. Don't let nothing happen to him. He's trying to make you proud and in doing so, he is trying his hardest to give the drinking up. Hell, I already have friends going to his house to get rid of the alcohol and anything that could remind of him. Finally, we can see the house without all the beer cans all over the place. In addition, Dave and I told the roommates that they had a choice...get rid of the alcohol or get out of his house. MOMS! Just help me. God, give me guidance and DO NOT take this one also. ENOUGH please.