Lies by Omission

Comments
flirty_me_1	1/17/2010 3:49:45 AM YES!!!!!!! SMILE, I believe a lie is a lie and leaving out important things is not right and often when found out, you know eventually the truth becomes obvious. It will affect the relationship.
harrybyvick	1/17/2010 4:22:41 AM I have to give that a big "yes" as I get out all health issues, or anything that I deem important but that's me.
pretty_moonpa	1/17/2010 4:53:39 AM Sure.....anything that affects the relationship should be divulged....however some want to know every detail of your past and I feel lots of things are personal and not relevent to the health of the relationship....
texangelfire	1/17/2010 4:58:40 AM Absolutely must be discussed if it is relevant to the relationship. If you intentionally leave it out then it is a lie and the lying becomes more important than the issue.
joiseygal	1/17/2010 5:33:11 AM I fully concur with Pretty on this. Anything that MUST be told should be told. I don't believe that past relationships fall into that category though. They belong in your "deleted files."
10snut	1/17/2010 5:41:53 AM Yeppers - tell it like it is ....... then things are up front. HONESTY is always the best way.
harrybyvick	1/17/2010 5:43:53 AM I checked out something woman I got interested in that her past boyfriends kids told her. Turns out she really was a control freak & very abusive to her boyfriend. Kids stood up for their dad & told her to hit the road which is why I declined further contact with her. When in doubt - check it out from the Marine on Sunset lake
flirty_me_1	1/17/2010 5:49:06 AM There are things that really do not concern the relationship, however if ask, I will just tell. Don't ask if you don't want to know. That said, still many things happen and they are who we are today. I only ask for a general over view of a mans past. I do not really want all the details. It does not concern me.
10snut	1/17/2010 7:05:07 AM I agree flirty - I do not want details about all their past loves and what they did and where they did it. There are some things that are not pertinent to a present relationship. I do want to know how many marriages, alcohol probs, how many children/step children etc. But I don't need to know all the intimate details of the past relationships. If I am asked - then I will tell the truth or I will tell you it is none of your business (in a nice way)....
utahgal1	1/17/2010 9:39:14 AM Truth will always surface. Be ready or not.
nenebubbles	1/17/2010 9:51:35 AM Since I am looking to share my life with someone is honest, comfortable to be with, and has a healthy sense of humor, I would have no problems being honest about who I am. I think in the progression of getting to know someone there are appropriate times to share truths and life happenings.
nenebubbles	1/17/2010 9:53:06 AM So, yes, it is lying when not sharing something important that could affect your relations.
nenebubbles	1/17/2010 9:54:32 AM Unless you have decided that there will not be a relaltionship ... so then do not need to share. Sorry ... very disconnected this morning.
rosesandsmiles	1/17/2010 11:45:33 AM I totally agree with all comments. Harry I so agree, Health issues are definitely a must and anything that you deem important. Personality traits, now that the freighting one. I was married to a physical and mental abuser. The first time he attacked me I was in total shook. My concern is how would one detect mental illness when it is so easy to conceal?
catsmam76	1/17/2010 2:18:39 PM YUP
harrybyvick	1/18/2010 4:08:00 AM I can't speak for others but past involvements & how they ended are very relevant - at least to me. I'm pretty smooth about asking questions honed from years of alcohol assessments but I know what someone thinks is functional for them might not be okay for me. The last lady that started getting close to me looked wonderful on paper with church attendance, etc. Turns out she was a terror with past boyfriends kids and was as controlling and possesive as they came. Fortunately I moved very slow with her & bid her ado once I verified that information. It's a tough world dating at our age trying to find a suitable partner
pretty_moonpa	1/18/2010 4:21:00 AM I was married for 37 years when my husband passed,,,,other than that the specifics of my marriage are no one else's business,as someone else's are not mine...I know a red flag when I see one...married 3 or 4 times....hmmmmm the common denominator would be the MAN.....adult kids wanting nothing to do with you...hmmmmm maybe one...but when all of someones kids are estranged thats a red flag...etc etc etc some things need no words...just time and observation....
foreveralady	1/18/2010 3:02:37 PM I THINK when you first meet you shouldn't fill yourtime with a lot of questions.On the 2nd. or 3rd. date would be the time to tell whatever they needed to know.......jmho-----hugs~~~fal
remodel	1/19/2010 5:59:33 AM Tell the truth to begin with...easier to weed out the useless one's.
redneckchic52	1/19/2010 7:02:21 AM What ya see is what ya get,Want to know something just ask I tell no lies
jestalookin	1/19/2010 8:30:17 PM Butt one must be careful. No need to clean you closet, soul and conscience in one evening. If they ask....answer honestly, if they don't, save it for later. C~
cuteface09	1/20/2010 8:59:00 AM Yes a lie is a lie no matter what it is about...
skip4637	1/23/2010 6:13:49 PM PAST IS WHAT YOU ARE TRYING TO GET OVER, IT IS NOT IMPORTANT TO KNOW, ABOUT WHO WAS AT FAULT. IT,S ABOUT HOW YOU AN THE PERSON YOUR WITH, FEEL WITH EACH OTHER.