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Why are some afraid to love? by josephfromabove at 11/26/2011 7:55:33 PM It would seem when someone has something decent, and meaningful in their lives they would grab onto it, and hang on for dear life. But some treasure their solitude so much, they have forgotten how to love. Then when love comes, they withdraw into a defensive stance, and go into their wall of maybe never, too soon, too fast, too much closeness. When they long to love deeply. Why?

Comments
mattly26	11/26/2011 7:57:22 PM 1st
klynn0917	11/26/2011 8:06:13 PM Usually after being hurt walls go up.
brip6	11/26/2011 8:09:42 PM Agreed hurt equals walls or perhaps maybe someone just doesn't seek "love" at that particular moment?
mercedesone	11/26/2011 8:12:35 PM Love can be defined in many different ways, Maybe the person only wants to give love in a friend ship way, and some one wants more.there for you feel they are not giving you want you want.
mattly26	11/26/2011 8:14:16 PM Love will seek you out if you let it...jmo
jocieanne	11/26/2011 8:15:21 PM Many times a wall because of a past hurt and also it is hard to allow someone so close to your inner feelings and thoughts and fear of being hurt. JMHO
earldirt	11/26/2011 8:30:35 PM I had a lady "friend" like that,she was so scared of failure after two marriages,she couldn't go beyond being friends even after three years of close ties
josephfromabove	11/26/2011 8:43:27 PM Mattly26 what does 1st mean? The wall comes up after someone gets too close to them, and they feel pressured, when there is not any pressure, but honest expression of feelings, Maybe I should have a job where I get to beat the crap out of someone, and tazer, and pepperspray them to release my tensions as being more manlike, or is that Neanderthal like? Come here baby, and club them and drag them into the man cave by their hair?......LOL......not. Or perhaps they are playing one for a fool, and spreading gossip to others as a personal joke. That would be truly sick. Society is definetly gone to it's lowest point. I fear nothing, not even love, even if it means death.
gracflhrt	11/26/2011 8:45:30 PM Depending on how high those walls are built. For some it will take a long time to allow any one to help knock them down,,, trust and perseverance comes to mind..For other walls it just may take love and patience... Some people will never allow anyone close enough to try...it's safer for them...Me.. I'm not afraid...if I can't knock it down I will climb over it if that's what it takes...of course if someone keeps building walls in front of me.. I may get worn out and stop trying..it takes a loving heart to have a person trust U enough to hand over the hammer in the first place to you... if people have walls that need to decide if their really ready to date.. it starts from within..
klynn0917	11/26/2011 8:52:01 PM Yes you have to be willing to let someone knock the walls down, be it with a feather or a jack hammer.
jocieanne	11/26/2011 8:52:05 PM Joseph, You have the right attitude you should not fear love. If it is true love there is nothing to fear. LOve is kind, love does not get puffed up, it is not hurtful, and so much more. Love and trust go hand in hand. If you love someone then you trust and have faith enough that they are not going to hurt you.It still happens sometimes but you have a lot to loose if you do not try.JMHO
1lonelyheart4u	11/26/2011 10:50:03 PM AFTER YOU GET BURNED SO MANY TIME YOU LEARN NOT TO STAND TO CLOSE TO THE FIRE.
heartofgoldl	11/26/2011 11:01:46 PM good answer lonelyheart!
gracflhrt	11/27/2011 12:51:49 AM AWEEE!!!! ladies.... breath on this one....life is so worth every chance we take in life.... I will die trying.... I WANNA LIVE!!!..... LIFE to the fullest.... (in a respectable manner of course)....I am so sad here at moments when I see my friends limit them selves..
josephfromabove	11/27/2011 10:59:10 AM I weld, I work with fire, and energy plasma.I have been burned many times, and in love only once. I am not afraid of love it is others I have posed the blog for. I am pleased you are concerned for me though...
gardenbunny	11/27/2011 11:18:28 AM Some of us are here for friends and companionship. If love comes later, than it will happen naturally as all things should.
josephfromabove	11/27/2011 4:11:20 PM Excellent point, as long as one does not insinuate they are, when they are not, and back away too soon to be able to let themselves feel love, because they are frightened of it. It can be only natural, when their is not any inner emotional influence, or conflicts, to stop it from happening. Then all things felt, are artificial, and constructed of fantasies, and ideal mate figures, Thank you for your input GardenBunny.
mkjpol	11/30/2011 10:43:03 PM I would say some have been hurt so badly that they are afraid of being hurt again, so they run the other way when love comes knocking at their door. The thing I don't understand is why are they on a date site saying they are looking for someone to love and be loved by. Maybe it is because loving someone on a date site and never meeting them is safe.