| 9/3/2008 4:23:39 PM |
I need dating advise... I dont understand what is wrong with me |
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lucks_girl
Blowing Rock, NC
age: 25
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So I went out on a date with this guy last night. He was somewhat older, 32 to be exact. I'm 23. We went out to a nice restaurant and had really good converstaion. It got time to go and he said he didn't want me to leave so we just stood in the parkinglot and talked for like 2 hours. It was really good converstaion. So at like 10:30 I told him that I needed to go home. He leaned in to kiss me goodnight. Now I am old fashioned I guess but I dont kiss on the first date. I told him that and he said it was totally cool and we set up a time to meet again... this weekend and he gave me a hug goodnight. So I texted him last night to make sure that he got home ok. He said he did and he said he had an amazing time and he couldn't wait to see me again. So this morning I texted him good morning. His reply was "I have had some time to think things thought want please leave me alone. I hope you find what you are looking for". WHAT!?! I dont understand what is wrong with me that guys just run away. Please take the time to look at my picture. I am really confident and fun loving. I really like to have a good time and I am really easy to talk to. Please someone tell me what is wrong with me and why I can't find a man.
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| 9/3/2008 4:52:58 PM |
I need dating advise... I dont understand what is wrong with me |
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kaos210
Mooresville, NC
age: 38
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hey its not you darling i grew up in blowing rock and people up there are still a little backward in there thinking.i would think that you saying no to the kiss scared him because the country thing is the guy runs the show and when you said no that put you in control and he lost all the control that he thought he had. but that is just what i think.
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| 9/3/2008 4:55:00 PM |
I need dating advise... I dont understand what is wrong with me |
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lucks_girl
Blowing Rock, NC
age: 25
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is there something wrong with being old fashioned? I mean... why rush things?
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| 9/3/2008 4:58:25 PM |
I need dating advise... I dont understand what is wrong with me |
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kaos210
Mooresville, NC
age: 38
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no thats cool but up there its all about i am man hear me roar.
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| 9/3/2008 5:05:19 PM |
I need dating advise... I dont understand what is wrong with me |
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lucks_girl
Blowing Rock, NC
age: 25
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I understand ... I just really want to meet someone and I really dont want to lose sight of what I value and what I think is right
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| 9/3/2008 5:15:22 PM |
I need dating advise... I dont understand what is wrong with me |
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lucks_girl
Blowing Rock, NC
age: 25
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thats really sweet of you to say... thank you
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| 9/3/2008 5:40:00 PM |
I need dating advise... I dont understand what is wrong with me |
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lionessleo
Louisburg, NC
age: 44
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definitely not you, he may have even been married, just looking for a side order. you will be shocked by some of the come ons that you get stand your ground, nothing is wrong with you, haven't you heard some men wants sluts who put out to have a f*** buddy, but a man looks for a good girl to marry.
Always meet in public, let at least one close friend know where you are, that way you have a way out, you can excuse yourself to the bathroom call a friend to call you back, say you got an emergency, that way if you are uncomfortable you have a quick out, and don't go straight home in case you are followed.
Keep your chin up.
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| 9/3/2008 6:05:27 PM |
I need dating advise... I dont understand what is wrong with me |
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raptsin
Los Angeles, CA
age: 24
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Its a kool situation though I don't think the guy u met was so kool to get along with U ,He might be havng some backup history.What he thought might be that a hookup and further bodily contacts thats all,All the best keep searching my friend
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| 9/3/2008 6:44:03 PM |
I need dating advise... I dont understand what is wrong with me |
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whynotgrl
Durham, NC
age: 52
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I think you texting him instead of waiting for him to come to you did it.
You may have come across as overly anxious. A guy likes a challenge. Play
it cool..like you do not care whether he calls or not. Let him make the first
2nd date contact. First you refused to kiss him goodnight and then you were
texting him all over the place..confusing messages for a guy to read. He gave up.
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| 9/3/2008 6:47:59 PM |
I need dating advise... I dont understand what is wrong with me |
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newlady2
Goldsboro, NC
age: 73
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why,,, thanks for teling her, I wanted to but thought she wouldn't " listen"
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| 9/3/2008 6:52:32 PM |
I need dating advise... I dont understand what is wrong with me |
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lucks_girl
Blowing Rock, NC
age: 25
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I am here to listen to what anyone has to say. I dont think that i came on to strong... I let him make the first move... but I dont thing there is anything wrong with telling someone good morning after you have had a good date with them and they have set up a date with you for the weekend. but I might be wrong. Personally I dont think there is anything wrong with not kissing on the first date. My parents raised me right
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| 9/3/2008 7:05:05 PM |
I need dating advise... I dont understand what is wrong with me |
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marys
Shelby, NC
age: 49
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ignore everyone and do what you think is right...
texting is just part of your generation, don't worry.
I am OLD and I would have done the same thing.
Be who you are...
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| 9/3/2008 7:09:06 PM |
I need dating advise... I dont understand what is wrong with me |
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whynotgrl
Durham, NC
age: 52
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I am here to listen to what anyone has to say. I dont think that i came on to strong... I let him make the first move... but I dont thing there is anything wrong with telling someone good morning after you have had a good date with them and they have set up a date with you for the weekend. but I might be wrong. Personally I dont think there is anything wrong with not kissing on the first date. My parents raised me right
I did not say there was anything wrong with holding back on kissing..BUT
maybe you could have given him a light little kiss on the cheek OR shook his
hand goodnight and held it a little longer while gazing lovingly into his eyes.
That way he would still be encouraged that you were definitely attracted to him
and perhaps the kiss would come at another time. Personally I think a little
"thank you" kiss on his cheek would have been very appropriate.
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| 9/3/2008 7:17:38 PM |
I need dating advise... I dont understand what is wrong with me |
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lionessleo
Louisburg, NC
age: 44
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mary I am 43 and I don't consider myself old.
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| 9/3/2008 7:35:29 PM |
I need dating advise... I dont understand what is wrong with me |
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whynotgrl
Durham, NC
age: 52
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to a stranger,who stopped her in a parking lot,as she was leaving.possibly could have turned real bad real fast,and the idiot from durham,naturally clarifies herself,with advise that has worked sooo well for her.ahem. 
WHAT is your problem with me? She did not just pick this guy up in a parking lot.
They were finishing up a real date. What is wrong with a small kiss on the cheek?
Why are YOU following me and making negative comments about everything I say?
YOU do not know me..Mr. Negative! 
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| 9/3/2008 7:39:04 PM |
I need dating advise... I dont understand what is wrong with me |
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lucks_girl
Blowing Rock, NC
age: 25
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I did give him a long hug goodnight... it lasted like 25 seconds... he knew I liked him.
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| 9/3/2008 7:40:32 PM |
I need dating advise... I dont understand what is wrong with me |
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whynotgrl
Durham, NC
age: 52
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hey durham dummy and grandma,if this was your daughter,and these are her words,quote,"It got time to go and he said he didn't want me to leave so we just stood in the parkinglot and talked for like 2 hours. It was really good converstaion. So at like 10:30 I told him that I needed to go home. He leaned in to kiss me goodnight".now,try to think your responses and clarifications out before you give stupid advise.you are not dr.joyce,so stop trying to give bullcrap advise to a girl that is a little hurt and confused,but has managed to hold on to her values.i am a little concerned about her judgment,but thats the dad in me coming out.
Then stop calling other people in this forum dummys and idiots! We too are
just trying to help. By the way..she is not twelve..she is a young adult.
Stop with the name calling..its disrespectful Dad. 
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| 9/3/2008 7:46:26 PM |
I need dating advise... I dont understand what is wrong with me |
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whynotgrl
Durham, NC
age: 52
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Just talk to RDClaw2000 from now on..he knows better than us.
Although he is a man. Two women who were once your age were just
trying to help. One lady a gentle grandmotherly type BUT NO YOU
HAVE TO LISTEN ONLY TO HIM..RDCLAW2000 knows what is best for you.
I'm outta here..see ya.. 
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| 9/3/2008 7:46:31 PM |
I need dating advise... I dont understand what is wrong with me |
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marys
Shelby, NC
age: 49
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I don't consider myelf old either but compared to luck's we are OLD sweetheart, I was making a point not a putdown.
I agree with what she did, should any of us kiss someone we don't want to just for the hell of it? I don't think so, I've been on first dates where I didn't kiss the guy either.
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| 9/3/2008 7:47:25 PM |
I need dating advise... I dont understand what is wrong with me |
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lucks_girl
Blowing Rock, NC
age: 25
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I am not heart broken... I was not looking for mr. right... just someone to spend time with... I just dont understand why people have to be so mean. And why I can't find a good one. I mean it feels like if I wont give "it", men dont want anything to do with you.
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| 9/3/2008 7:51:04 PM |
I need dating advise... I dont understand what is wrong with me |
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lucks_girl
Blowing Rock, NC
age: 25
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why girl... I am listening to everyone. i am going though a hard time right now that has nothing to do with what the man did today. I was asking a question if there was something wrong with how I approched the night's end because this is what I always do. No matter how much I do or dont like the guy... I dont kiss on the first date. Is that what is causing me to not be able to find a guy now? that was my question. I have not put anyone down or condoned anyone doing it. I am greatful for what anyone has to say on the topic.
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| 9/3/2008 10:26:24 PM |
I need dating advise... I dont understand what is wrong with me |
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raptsin
Los Angeles, CA
age: 24
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why girl... I am listening to everyone. i am going though a hard time right now that has nothing to do with what the man did today. I was asking a question if there was something wrong with how I approched the night's end because this is what I always do. No matter how much I do or dont like the guy... I dont kiss on the first date. Is that what is causing me to not be able to find a guy now? that was my question. I have not put anyone down or condoned anyone doing it. I am greatful for what anyone has to say on the topic.
let me say it 2 U,As u know me and I know U,we both got introduced here on certain situation,no need to explain it though U R keen to find someone 4 U,but if u want to giveup hope and go into deep thoughts its wrong .men are so mean includingme I can say 2 U.So be calm ....If he is truthful 2 U he will turn back 2 U hunny,if not there are other chances waiting 4 U.....With love,Raptsin
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| 9/4/2008 9:59:42 AM |
I need dating advise... I dont understand what is wrong with me |
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whynotgrl
Durham, NC
age: 52
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first off,the women in duram has not had much luck on the net.now,why in the world would a 23 year old girl want to kiss a 30 something man she does not know?it wasn't even a date!second point,of course she texed him back,she wanted to know when they would meet again,he said they would.and to grand ma,i would like to know which way you would prefer one of your own to behave.frankly,i think you are full of it!
What? You sir DO NOT KNOW WHAT YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT! Did I reject your little
wink? Oh..pardon me if I wasn't interested in you. You are a name calling crude
individual. Maybe I sensed that immediately. I have had plenty of men show interest
in me on this site. Are you in my in box? How would you know? I have also only been
on this site for two weeks. How long have you been on here..two years?
I am only here for conversation and some laughs..thats all and that is my choice.
I wish there was a icon below flipping you the finger..I would click on it.
Leave me alone..please!
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| 9/4/2008 4:40:15 PM |
I need dating advise... I dont understand what is wrong with me |
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justintimepiece
Raleigh, NC
age: 32
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Well it's not you because you were just being you. Most men, and yeah me sometimes too, don't take what might be considered "rejection" well. That's how he saw it anyway. The more he thought about what happened the more pissed off he probably got and figured it was going to take to long to get you in to bed. Is that right? HELL NO. Keep pluggin girl you just haven't found one that's grown up all the way yet and is comfortable with HIMSELF.
"Working on a relationship is tough. Working on yourself is tougher.Working on a realationship BEFORE yourself...is impossible." -me lol.
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| 9/5/2008 7:20:06 PM |
I need dating advise... I dont understand what is wrong with me |
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dirty_hooligan
Greensboro, NC
age: 25
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There is nothing wrong with you. youre beautiful, and seem like you have a very good head on your shoulders. in fact, if i were closer to you, id definitely ask you out on a date. nothin wrong with being traditional. people nowadays just want everything so fast. (no wonder divorce rates are what they are.) He just couldnt handle the whole "take it slow" thing. Youll find that guy.
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| 9/6/2008 5:52:33 AM |
I need dating advise... I dont understand what is wrong with me |
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dprincess
Concord, NC
age: 47
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Nothing wrong with you... except that you let a guy with issues make you doubt yourself. You may never know what is "wrong" with him. But stay confident and you will find a much better match for yourself. Not kissing on first date is your choice, never let anyone fault you for that.
I have to wonder if your texting made him uncomfortable because a wife was close by?
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| 9/8/2008 2:57:44 AM |
I need dating advise... I dont understand what is wrong with me |
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life_is_a_dance
Fayetteville, NC
age: 54
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His reply was "I have had some time to think things thought want please leave me alone. I hope you find what you are looking for". WHAT!?!
I have to agree with you ...WHAT!?! What exactly is he saying here or is it just me that is lost??? "I have had some time to think things thought want please leave me alone."
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| 9/8/2008 5:21:01 AM |
I need dating advise... I dont understand what is wrong with me |
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olderblueeyes
Morganton, NC
age: 53
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I know that I'm older and slower than you. At 23 years old I was married to the wrong man but stayed for the kids. Big Mistake. Now, I'm 52 years young, and dont know Jack about men in this new world. I will say that you did not do nothing wrong. Some men want the cake and ice cream too. That's a fact...
Stand your ground, do what you feel, and listen to your gut feelings.
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| 9/9/2008 8:09:28 PM |
I need dating advise... I dont understand what is wrong with me |
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raptsin
Los Angeles, CA
age: 24
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I know that I'm older and slower than you. At 23 years old I was married to the wrong man but stayed for the kids. Big Mistake. Now, I'm 52 years young, and dont know Jack about men in this new world. I will say that you did not do nothing wrong. Some men want the cake and ice cream too. That's a fact...
Stand your ground, do what you feel, and listen to your gut feelings.
U R Right.......I do agree with U
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| 9/12/2008 7:17:18 PM |
I need dating advise... I dont understand what is wrong with me |
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swede28621
Elkin, NC
age: 46
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I think you texting him instead of waiting for him to come to you did it.
You may have come across as overly anxious. A guy likes a challenge. Play
it cool..like you do not care whether he calls or not. Let him make the first
2nd date contact. First you refused to kiss him goodnight and then you were
texting him all over the place..confusing messages for a guy to read. He gave up.
I'm old fashioned, but I am the kinda guy who lets the lady call the pace...I just hate it when they say yea I'll call or even ask to call you and then drop off the map...maybe its me ...lol Any way if he said it like that he's got another that he's really interested in whether or not he's married is no matter. You at least had the respect given to have him call back and that was a good thing.
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| 9/14/2008 5:09:59 PM |
I need dating advise... I dont understand what is wrong with me |
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istaywired
Durham, NC
age: 47
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I may be old fashioned but I would never call or text or email a man after a date. Let him contact you first. Men are different. They need space. They need time to marinade. You hit him up twice. He got scared. He ran. Men run when their space is threatened. Just my opinion. I could be wrong. I am not an expert.
I'm sorry you have to go through that! I know it must have hurt you!!
Take care of yourself!
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| 9/15/2008 4:33:33 AM |
I need dating advise... I dont understand what is wrong with me |
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medo1450
Mebane, NC
age: 50
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I think you texting him instead of waiting for him to come to you did it.
You may have come across as overly anxious. A guy likes a challenge. Play
it cool..like you do not care whether he calls or not. Let him make the first
2nd date contact. First you refused to kiss him goodnight and then you were
texting him all over the place..confusing messages for a guy to read. He gave up.
Whynotgrl, I agree with everything you said. I don't know many men that are here looking for another mother, that has to call & make sure he made it home okay, or someone giving signs of clinginess.....Sometimes you do all you can do & people still don't want to listen to good advise. Oh well, you did what you could. Keep it up though & maybe you can help someone in the future! 
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| 9/15/2008 8:45:24 PM |
I need dating advise... I dont understand what is wrong with me |
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judiet
Winston Salem, NC
age: 64
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I konw I am going to sound hard but....get over it....learn from these things.....was it him?...was it you? ...who knows and you probably will never know....If you like who you are...that is all that is important...let it ride
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| 9/16/2008 3:51:43 PM |
I need dating advise... I dont understand what is wrong with me |
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georgiapete
Lenoir, NC
age: 52
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The text in the morning probably made him freak out. It suddenly went from a casual relationship to something more serious ( in his mind ) and he RAN.  It was probably inevitable and the text just pushed the decision forward. Ive always heard the expression "go slow" but, truthfully, if there is chemistry, he or she is the perfect person and all the lights are green, then there is nothing wrong with moving "fast". If the first meeting doesnt allow "text messages" the next morning its probably best to let it go 
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| 9/16/2008 4:01:39 PM |
I need dating advise... I dont understand what is wrong with me |
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ladybugkdt
High Point, NC
age: 52
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I am 50 and still believe in waiting for that first kiss. You have to click and if you don't then there is no reason to pursue a relationship. There's nothing wrong with the way you think. I am a bit old fashion myself. I like to take it slow at first and see if there is an attraction. He just wasn't for you. Sounds like a player to me.
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| 9/17/2008 1:47:29 PM |
I need dating advise... I dont understand what is wrong with me |
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madeasfriend
Charlotte, NC
age: 49
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Becoming lesbian is not the answer, if you are interested in men, then be interested in them. Don't wear your heart on your selve about what happens on a date. Not to worry, God has not forgotten you. The right guy is there and he's probably right around the corner, your looking to hard and your probably overlooking that special someone. Be safe in all your dealings with dating.
Keep your head up and keep being you, because someone will love you for you someday. Take your time and don't be in a hurry.
Love, hugs and kisses
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| 9/17/2008 3:43:47 PM |
I need dating advise... I dont understand what is wrong with me |
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tattookrissi
Stem, NC
age: 23
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ur a really pretty girl hun theres nothing wrong with u and if he says something like that to u hes not worth ur time u deserve better ull find it
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| 9/17/2008 10:16:56 PM |
I need dating advise... I dont understand what is wrong with me |
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jojomojo7
Charlotte, NC
age: 54
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I think the jerk is married. The text message in the morning caught him off guard and scared him (thought maybe "someone else" would see it). Dishonest people suck.
Honey, let him go his own way, you are better off!
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| 9/21/2008 12:47:13 PM |
I need dating advise... I dont understand what is wrong with me |
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tweetbird58
Oxford, NC
age: 51
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Girl, you did nothing wrong, at all, it was him, okay, not you, if he has a problem with a text, his issue not yours. Give yourself a break. I'm older and don't kiss on the first date and make mistakes in a date, just started dating again. I've even asked... so who do you feel should make any future plans, you, me, mutual? Cuz I don't know if I don't ask and nothing's been brought up... if getting along well. That's what being sincere, honest, and at ease with someone is. I don't want a guessing game and it gets hard if you're shy at first, I usually am, been fighting that off since I was born! But once you get to know me, I'm very open. If someone has that big of an issue & gets scared off, you don't need him. A hug is fine, the parking lot was okay if YOU felt safe, I think you're smart enough to not go to an unsafe place. Ya know, I've been told to get pepper spray or tazer just in case....maybe we all should have pepper spray. And people, let's try to stay on the thread, someone misunderstood something and & escalated, back to thread please, people need all different types of advice from different types of people & it is all appreciated. It really is. Yall take care!
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