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11/7/2007 10:46:19 AM Need your opinion!  
butterfly58
Over 1,000 Posts (1,687)
Arcadia, MO
age: 60


Okay, there's this guy that I've been having this LDR with for quite some time and we've met and we really connected on many things. Now he's back to where he lives and we still talk quite often even made plans for anoher visit in the near future. Today he calls and says he's getting quite a few "friends" request and wondered what I thought about them (He never has "friends" on his page) Well I told him my thoughts and then he went on to ask why haven't I been going out and having fun? Later on the thought occurred to me that's he's feeling guilty about what he wants to do with all those "friends" he was talking about!! and I emailed him this thought also. Said "Do what you want to do but know I'm not fine with it" Should I dump his ass?

11/7/2007 10:48:35 AM Need your opinion!  
trublu5ft2
Over 10,000 Posts!!! (14,857)
Saint Joseph, TN
age: 52


Yup.. he is " fishing" He is seeing if you are doing the same as he is so it will be " ok" for him to do it.. if he hasn't already.

11/7/2007 10:52:27 AM Need your opinion!  
butterfly58
Over 1,000 Posts (1,687)
Arcadia, MO
age: 60


Yelp--that's what I thought. I may be "blond" but I ain't that stupid!!!

11/7/2007 10:55:37 AM Need your opinion!  
trublu5ft2
Over 10,000 Posts!!! (14,857)
Saint Joseph, TN
age: 52


Sounds like a game player.. I have no patience for them

11/7/2007 11:02:27 AM Need your opinion!  

knightnyte2
Over 7,500 Posts!! (8,357)
Spring, TX
age: 56


sadly, out of sight, out of mind comes to play. sorry this guy does not share the same feelings you have for him.

a LDR is hard enough to establish, much less keep. having friends on your profile doesnt mean much to me, other than just friends. perhaps he did not think of your relationship in the same way. Only you can answer that. good luck though...

11/7/2007 11:03:26 AM Need your opinion!  

phucq
Panama City, FL
age: 66


Sorry, but I don't understand your attitude about this. A LDR is not a committed relationship in my opinion. You've met him once, but you are not actually dating him. If you were dating him, then that would be an entirely different situation. But, in this case, I think he has a right to see other people and so do you. Your demands seem unreasonable to me at this point in time, and that may run him off. I say give this time to see where it goes, and don't push him for a commitment until the relationship has a more solid foundation.

11/7/2007 11:05:54 AM Need your opinion!  
butterfly58
Over 1,000 Posts (1,687)
Arcadia, MO
age: 60


Oh He still says the pretty words and that we have a "special" connection--YEA RIGHT! pour me another one and I'll have the same as him!

11/7/2007 11:08:09 AM Need your opinion!  
butterfly58
Over 1,000 Posts (1,687)
Arcadia, MO
age: 60


No I've actually met him more than once and it is a committed relationship--guess not for him though

11/7/2007 11:11:40 AM Need your opinion!  
trublu5ft2
Over 10,000 Posts!!! (14,857)
Saint Joseph, TN
age: 52


LDR can be a committed relationship.. if it is indeed with the goal of moving much closer together with time. Otherwise, I can't figure out what a LDR is.

11/7/2007 11:13:55 AM Need your opinion!  

phucq
Panama City, FL
age: 66


Words are cheap... I don't understand why women haven't figured out to go by what men do and not by what we say. In any case, you live in different cities, and don't see each other on a regular basis, so I say you shouldn't expect much from such a relationship. It's hard enough for a man to be faithful to a woman when they live in the same town and he see each other all the time.

11/7/2007 11:20:18 AM Need your opinion!  

phucq
Panama City, FL
age: 66


Sorry, I got the impression from your original post that you only met him once (you weren't specific). I guess I'm different than you ladies, but I don't consider long distance romances to be real. I think many men feel the same way, which is why so many of you ladies get your hearts broken.

11/7/2007 11:24:16 AM Need your opinion!  
trublu5ft2
Over 10,000 Posts!!! (14,857)
Saint Joseph, TN
age: 52


Ohhhhhhhh but they are very real! I had such a relationship for 8 months before he proposed.. we saw one another at least every other weekend if not more

11/7/2007 11:25:18 AM Need your opinion!  

knightnyte2
Over 7,500 Posts!! (8,357)
Spring, TX
age: 56


i can see both of your views and points.. to me, committed is committed. I would constantly search for ways to visit my lady friend. work an extra shift down at the burger shop to pay for my plane tickets.

when i am involved, i have tunnel vision about that person. Involved means met, got along, find more attractive each time we see each other. Commitment means making future plans. Besides, those who are playas... have too much trouble remember which lie he told to which.

JMO...

11/7/2007 11:33:02 AM Need your opinion!  

thepkk
Over 4,000 Posts! (6,879)
Ash Grove, MO
age: 54


I have the hardest time figuring out who the players are and who are not.

11/7/2007 11:34:23 AM Need your opinion!  
trublu5ft2
Over 10,000 Posts!!! (14,857)
Saint Joseph, TN
age: 52


exactly knight. And if this guy is asking such questions.. he just isn't ready or prepared to further their relationship. I say.. drop him unless you can deal with what he is asking.