| 11/22/2007 9:42:13 AM |
Okay, big trouble here....Patchwork Orange? |
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skunkbreath
Saint James, MO
age: 52
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I was given one these mp3 players....little dude with tiny switches and a really tiny, touchy touch screen thing that makes tiny little words and other things come up on a tiny little screen....the whole thing is tiny!!
well, got someone to help me get some radio programmes and music into the lil dude, and i can hang these tiny little speakers onto my ears and listen to them....i have little control over what it plays, but i have found that if i poke at the tiny little and touchy touch thing i will eventually get something that i want to listen to...
Now, the problem.....i went to bed thinking that i could lull myself to sleep listening to a recorded talk show on my lil player. First thing i find is that the lil dude gets lost in the covers and when i jerk on the leash it comes out and now lil dude player is lost in the covers and i can't hear anything.....so's i decide to fix that!!..
when i find the lil dude i tape it to my chest with some duct tape...can't hear anything after i plug the leash with the speakers into it....so, i rip the tape off and poke at the touchy screen thing.....this ripping of tape and hair has woke me up quite a bit, but i am hearing something, so i reapply the tape over the player and onto my chest and lay back to listen and perhaps fall asleep.
now, i discover that the sound is too loud!...so, i rip off the tape, with a few less hairs this time, and eventually poke the volume down and find something to listen to, poking....though i am now very wide awake and in increasing pain, i reapply the tape and lay back to listen.....soon, a speaker falls out.
more duct tape takes care of that, and i am soon again reclining in the warmth of my bed.
i wake with a start, the pain of hair being pulled out, sometime during the night, to find that duct tape , being what duct tape is, has somehow managed to peel back enough to affex itself to whatever was near to it.
Now, it is dark, i am tangled in covers and lil dudes leash with speakers that are now taped to my head hair, and every move removes a hair or two somewhere on my body. This is beginning to be not fun.
Well, i finally got untangled, removed the tape, exposing several bare spots on my chest that i treated with vicks, and have put lil dude player and the wads of duct tape stuck to it in a safe drawer after one of the cats got ensared in the evil machine.
Now that you understand the circumstances and my dilemma, the question: Will a woman date me if she finds out about my patchwork chest hair?
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| 11/22/2007 9:49:12 AM |
Okay, big trouble here....Patchwork Orange? |
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v2_1
McHenry, IL
age: 44
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ROFLMAO! The chest hair is no problem..... the complete and utter lack of common sense is! 
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| 11/22/2007 9:58:27 AM |
Okay, big trouble here....Patchwork Orange? |
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klassykitten
Toccoa, GA
age: 50 online now!
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Wear a T-shirt and admit to nothin....lmao
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| 11/22/2007 9:59:04 AM |
Okay, big trouble here....Patchwork Orange? |
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emt854
Appleton, WI
age: 53
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OMG I spit out my coffee all over this little thingie I call a monitor
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| 11/22/2007 10:40:55 AM |
Okay, big trouble here....Patchwork Orange? |
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skunkbreath
Saint James, MO
age: 52
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And, if i do get into a relationship, and i do exocise the demon from lil dude player, could the use of lil dude player with the duct tape restraints be a probem in bed?
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| 11/22/2007 10:44:49 AM |
Okay, big trouble here....Patchwork Orange? |
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v2_1
McHenry, IL
age: 44
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Still missing the common sense..... 
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| 11/22/2007 10:46:14 AM |
Okay, big trouble here....Patchwork Orange? |
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matichee
Franklin, AR
age: 49
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Try investing in a radio/cd player instead
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| 11/22/2007 10:49:55 AM |
Okay, big trouble here....Patchwork Orange? |
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klassykitten
Toccoa, GA
age: 50 online now!
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well you already have a taste of what waxing would be like....so buck up and finish the job.
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| 11/22/2007 10:53:19 AM |
Okay, big trouble here....Patchwork Orange? |
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judi35
Madisonville, KY
age: 58
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| 11/22/2007 12:33:45 PM |
Okay, big trouble here....Patchwork Orange? |
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mom1st
York, SC
age: 30
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too funny
there for a while your lil dude sounded like something else too, guess I thought I was in the sex forum
the whole thing is tiny
hang these lil tiny speakers to it
I have lil control over it
if I poke at the tiny lil and touchy touch I will eventually get something
lil dude got lost in the covers
I jerk on the leash
I tape the lil dude to my chest with duct tape
put it up for safe keeping cause of the cats
Moral of the story, never tape your lil dude to anything
[Edited 11/22/2007 12:34:06 PM]
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| 11/22/2007 12:42:48 PM |
Okay, big trouble here....Patchwork Orange? |
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wonderturtle
Overland Park, KS
age: 41
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Mom .you're a sick and twisted woman...go to my room
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| 11/22/2007 12:53:55 PM |
Okay, big trouble here....Patchwork Orange? |
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fab4bird
North Augusta, SC
age: 50
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skunkbreath, you are a hoot!!
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| 11/22/2007 12:54:58 PM |
Okay, big trouble here....Patchwork Orange? |
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bubbadt
Kennedy, NY
age: 65
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Mom, got the same picture.
Now if heda sed i got a big player and lost it
it wouldnt have sounded so strange.
Skunk, I hope you have a lotta fun with yer
lil dude, thats a cute name for it anyway.
Dont tell anyone else, Im gonna whisper now"junior"
Did ya hear HUH HUH HUH??? I call it that cause
it never grew up to be a big boy. dontcha know?
But please keep this a secret, I am sure no one
heerd me tell ya that.
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| 11/22/2007 12:58:42 PM |
Okay, big trouble here....Patchwork Orange? |
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superheroscoo
Garden City, KS
age: 24
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Dude, get one of those arm bands for your "little dude"
Shit...
My chest hair grows in like the bat symbol on my chest. I just shave it off anymore. It looks ridiculous.
Good times man.
Happy Thanksgiving!
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| 11/22/2007 2:39:10 PM |
Okay, big trouble here....Patchwork Orange? |
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truegrace
Hagerstown, MD
age: 51 online now!
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OMG! Are you for real? never laughed so hard!
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