| 11/29/2007 9:17:02 PM |
Never Married |
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newby1972
Tifton, GA
age: 35
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I never got married but had a child who's "co-creator' decided not to be involoved. Some are open to that, others slam me for raising a son on my own. Anyone else in a similar situation or could offer advice? I'm not a bad person at all, I just don't want a 'casual realtionship' like so many men have on thier profile. I got snowed, but I'm not stupid. Thanks for your help!
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| 11/29/2007 9:45:00 PM |
Never Married |
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mfpc58
Woodlyn, PA
age: 48
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The question is do you totally love your child and do anything for him/her? If you do, don't worry about what other people think. Children are gods gift to man and nature. It's great watching them being born, growing up through their life, going to school, and then getting married or moving on to their own lives. Don't worry, there is someone out there that will take you and your child as a set. They are hard to find. If they don't take both of you, they are not worth it. Times are tough for a single parent, but they do get better. as they say, make your life work. Enjoy what's there. Hope this helped.
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| 11/29/2007 10:01:16 PM |
Never Married |
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newby1972
Tifton, GA
age: 35
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Thank you very much - I'm torn b/c so many people tell me my son needs a man in his life & I'm doing what I can for him. You're absolutley right - he is a blessing to the entire family that we thought was not possible. He is the absolute sunshine for so many that I can't even explain. Its nice to know that someone I've never met doesn't judge. Again, THANK YOU!
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| 11/29/2007 10:10:28 PM |
Never Married |
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malicai
Edmonton, AB
age: 32
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Ya, have to agree there. I myself would take a woman and child as a set, since u can't pick or choose who you love, and really, kids are a LOT of fun. Only reason why I would not date a woman I was sweet on if she had a kid, was if the kid didn't like me.
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| 11/29/2007 10:16:28 PM |
Never Married |
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nonickname49
Belchertown, MA
age: 57
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Newby...my daughter had a child and was not married...and the father had nothing
to do with him...she worked, cared for her son...went to school...family judged
because she had a child unmarried...but he was a blessing...as his grandfather
we are very close...almost as if he was my son..
You should notlet folks get to you...what is important is that you love your
child...love yourself...I admire you for raising him on your own..Many women
would go or marry a man that would be harmful to a relationship..just to avoid
doing it on their own. You had the courage to take care of things on your own. Be
proud of yourself..ignore those who judge..you cannot and should not live your
life thru the eyes of others...live it your way...yes people say a boy needs a
man in his life...most important he needs stability and love...sounds like thats
what he has...love is a strong foundation for manhood...
Any man that slights you for being a single mother, who never married is not
worthy of you....never settle for less..only settle for what it is you want
nothing less. Oh, and by the way..there are men out there who would not
hesitate to become involved with a woman who has a child.
Paul
[Edited 11/29/2007 10:19:51 PM]
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| 11/29/2007 10:16:34 PM |
Never Married |
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mfpc58
Woodlyn, PA
age: 48
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I think my feelings also come with age. The older the better. Unfortunately, I was divorced after 24 years and I thought I found the perfect mate for life. I was wrong. I have 5 great children and it was great watching them grow up. I have a daughter that has 2 and she is also a single parent. She is having a tough time, but is getting better for her. Her children are great and they make me laugh. Gives you a good feeling inside.
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| 11/29/2007 10:18:03 PM |
Never Married |
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pgm708
Greensburg, PA
age: 43
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I'm not in your same situation, but I know others who were. I see absolutely nothing wrong with a single parent raising their child alone - it's far better for your son to be raised in a loving environment than rushing in and out of relationships just to have a father figure around. Besides, there are probably many other father figures around to help guide your son as he gets older than you think - grandfathers, uncles, older cousins, neighbors, etc - all could offer support as your son matures. And once you find your own Mr. Right, I'm sure he'll want to offer guidance as well.
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| 11/29/2007 10:30:52 PM |
Never Married |
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4thd
Wrightsville, PA
age: 35
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Hi newbie !!!! I was that child with the single mom...she met a great man who adopted me as his son and we've had a great family ever since. You will know when you meet him but I'm sure he is out there.
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| 11/30/2007 4:37:31 AM |
Never Married |
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ladykathryn0414
Denison, IA
age: 29
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I know of a similar situation.. except the woman decided to give the child up for adoption, and ppl slam her for that decision. I just don't get where some ppl get off and can act all high an mighty. No matter what, there will always be someone out there looking down their noses at us. So do what is in your heart, and all others can go to Heck!!!!
And as for wanting something more then a casual relationship... there is nothing wrong with wanting that! You should go after whatever your heart desires.
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| 11/30/2007 7:04:30 AM |
Never Married |
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stormygrl
Longmont, CO
age: 41
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I had my daughter 12 years ago, and I wasn't married. I love my daughter with all my heart and soul, and I have seen many two parent families that don't even care about thier children or love them. I do the best job that I can - and up to this point I haven't even met a man that I would even let be her "father". So don't worry just do the best job you can and love with all your heart.
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| 11/30/2007 7:06:08 AM |
Never Married |
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tester28
Cleveland, OH
age: 22
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i'm in the exact situation as u. his dad up and left for atlanta for his career because it's always been his dream to be a cop oh i forgot, it was always my dream to be a single mom especially when having him so young, i was 17. anyway if u get any good advice please share.
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| 11/30/2007 7:38:12 AM |
Never Married |
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happy_lady2007
Rumford, ME
age: 45
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As a single mom to 3 grown children who I adore..You have so much to be thankful for as a single parent you get them all to yourself and the closeness is great.My kids are my life and being a single parent you get to give more time to them and ya when there young you need to be mom.But the reward is best friends as adults.I raised my kids to believe in God with morals and they are not perfect but they are good kids.One thing on advice.spend as much time as posible teaching and being there yet let them have trust and a bit of freedom in the world.But your there best teacher.my son now 25 said something to me as a 4 year old I never forgot .as my parents where kinda the children should be seen but not heard type.I started the same way.but this child of mine asked me a question about life and I was busy cooking and told him to go play.he said well your the mom your suppose to teach me things.at 4 years old that hit me like a ton of bricks and I used this reminder and never turned them away after I was there teacher the one that needed to mold them into one day being good adults..and one thing a child learns more by our actions to things than that we say....just a bit of advice hope it can be helpful....
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