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| 7/2/2009 8:50:21 PM |
Jokes, Comments, Snide Remarks, Fave U-tubes |
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joy617
Scottsboro, AL
age: 46
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Post anything to make us laugh! Got a funny poem or joke, share it here! Have a sarcastic sticker that you think is funny, Post it here!
Let's have some fun!
 Jan
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| 7/2/2009 8:51:24 PM |
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joy617
Scottsboro, AL
age: 46
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Featherhues aka Tobie wrote these poems in the 40's Group.
A WOMAN'S POEM:
Before I lay me down to sleep,
I pray for a man, who's not a creep,
One who's handsome, smart and strong.
One who loves to listen long,
One who thinks before he speaks,
One who'll call, not wait for weeks
I pray he's gainfully employed,
When I spend his cash, won't be annoyed.
Pulls out my chair and opens my door.
Massages my back and begs to do more.
Oh! Send me a man who'll make love to my mind,
Knows what to answer to 'how big is my behind?'
I pray that this man will love me to no end,
And always be my very best friend.
A MAN'S POEM:
I pray for a deaf-mute gymnast nymphomaniac with
huge tits and a nice arse who owns a bar on a golf course,
and loves to send me fishing and drinking. This
doesn't rhyme and I don't give a shit.
The End
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| 7/3/2009 11:02:56 AM |
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lbothere
Knoxville, TN
age: 57
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I saw a car in front of me a couple of weeks ago that had these bumper stickers on it:
"I have PMS AND a gun"
"I'm 51% Sweetheart and 49% B*tch...don't push it"!
I was just in the right mood that day to appreciate them! 
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| 7/3/2009 11:11:39 AM |
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lbothere
Knoxville, TN
age: 57
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Several years ago, I was a bank teller. There was this little old man, Mr. Clark, that was a rather flirty little man. He couldn't tell me what business he wanted to do without talking to my chest! I bet he was 85 if he was a day! hahaha Anyway, one day he came in and said, Ms. Becky, I want to tell you a poem. I thought Oh Lord, I can't even imagine....and he recited:
I know I'm getting old
And can hardly move about
And what USED to be my pride and joy
Is now just a water spout.
Bless his little heart!
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| 7/3/2009 11:16:59 AM |
Jokes, Comments, Snide Remarks, Fave U-tubes |
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cheekdaddy
Childersburg, AL
age: 39
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| 7/3/2009 11:19:28 AM |
Jokes, Comments, Snide Remarks, Fave U-tubes |
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browneyz
San Diego, CA
age: 57
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A doctor in an Alabama nursing home prescribed Viagra to the gentleman that wanted to keep their shoes dry
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| 7/3/2009 11:20:23 AM |
Jokes, Comments, Snide Remarks, Fave U-tubes |
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lbothere
Knoxville, TN
age: 57
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A doctor in an Alabama nursing home prescribed Viagra to the gentleman that wanted to keep their shoes dry
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| 7/3/2009 12:59:39 PM |
Jokes, Comments, Snide Remarks, Fave U-tubes |
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jake68me
Phenix City, AL
age: 47 online now!
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2 blondes walk into a building...ya figure one of em would have seen it!
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| 7/3/2009 1:07:16 PM |
Jokes, Comments, Snide Remarks, Fave U-tubes |
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jake68me
Phenix City, AL
age: 47 online now!
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whats the hardest thing about eating a vegetable?............the wheelchair!
worlds shortest fairy tale...
once upon a time, a guy asked a girl, "will you marry me?" the girl said "NO!"
the guy lived happily ever after and rode motorcycles and went fishin,huntin,played a lot of golf, drank a lot of beer, and left the toilet seat up whenever he wanted.....
the end.
(compliments of EASYRIDERS!)
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| 7/3/2009 2:06:41 PM |
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duchessa
Yonkers, NY
age: 58 online now!
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She was out shopping the other day when she saw six women beating her MIL up. As I stood there and watched, her neighbor, who knew her, said, "Well, aren't you going to help?" She replied, "No. Six of them is enough".
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| 7/3/2009 3:32:28 PM |
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lbothere
Knoxville, TN
age: 57
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I had a friend email this today:
Home Depot Scam
A 'heads up' for those who may be regular Home Depot customers.
This one caught me by surprise. Over the last month I became a victim
of a clever scam while out shopping. Simply going out to get supplies
has turned out to be quite traumatic. Don't be naive enough to think it
couldn't happen to you or your friends.
Here's how the scam works:
Two seriously good-looking 20-21 year-old girls come over to your car
as you are packing your shopping into the trunk. They both start wiping
your windshield with a rag and Windex, with their breasts almost
falling out of their skimpy T-shirts. It is impossible not to look.
When you thank them and offer them a tip, they say 'No' and in
stead ask
you for a ride to McDonald's. You agree and they get in the backseat.
On the way, they start undressing.
Then one of them climbs over into the front seat and starts crawling
all over you, while the other one steals your wallet.
I had my wallet stolen May 4th, 9th, 10th, twice on the 15th, 17th,
20th, 24th & 29th. Also April 1st, 4th, twice on the 8th, 16th, 23rd,
26th, 30th, three times last Saturday and very likely again this
upcoming weekend.
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| 7/3/2009 9:35:29 PM |
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kentuckyangel51
Bowling Green, KY
age: 52
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| 7/4/2009 6:43:40 AM |
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one2_69
Huntsville, AL
age: 56
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Kentuckyangel..... that was great..... thanks...
[Edited 7/4/2009 6:44:03 AM PST]
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| 7/4/2009 4:12:38 PM |
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bayoudreamer
Tuscaloosa, AL
age: 53
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I kid you not....
New Wine for Seniors
California vintners in the Napa Valley area, which primarily produce Pinot Blanc, Pinot Noir and Pinot Grigio wines, have developed a new hybrid grape that acts as an anti-diuretic.
It is expected to reduce the number of trips older people have to make to the bathroom during the night.
The new wine will be marketed as................ PINO MORE 
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| 7/4/2009 4:21:09 PM |
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tomfreebird
Brownsboro, AL
age: 56
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Now, if they could produce a beer that did the same. You know what they say, Drink one piss three
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