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Forums: Dating General Discussion: If someone wanted to get to know you, how should they go about it?
3/1/2008 12:28:06 PM If someone wanted to get to know you, how should they go about it?  

tom_alan
Pueblo, CO
age: 49

 1.Have a picture in your profile (having 16 of them in different situations would be nice - not of there pets – I don’t care what their pets look like – Children are ok’)

2.If you’re a shadow I think your hiding something – I’m not interested!

3.Write more than two or three lines in your profile. (Don’t have it blank – I do look at you’re profile before I respond)

4.E-mail me and let me know what you noticed in my profile that you’re interested in. (A wink is nice, but it is to easy all you have to do is click – I will most likely click back to be nice, doesn’t mean anything to me)

5.If we chat let me ask questions about you and you can ask questions about me.

6.I don’t care how much money you make; however, I would like to know what you do for a living, if have kids and are they living with you.
3/1/2008 2:49:11 PM If someone wanted to get to know you, how should they go about it?  

ret1058
Westerville, OH
age: 49

 Hi Tom....love that mountain behind you...nice!

I think you have a good list to start with.
Number 4 & 5 on your list are most important for me.

I prefer receiving emails to winks...as I feel they show more effort and interest. I know that some people wink to show interest...and that's ok...I will politely respond. However, I've had men wink at me...then I respond with a short email....and they keep winking! I'm thinking, "Why don't you write something?"

Questions both ways are important. I don't want to be the only one asking questions...it makes me feel that someone isn't really interested in me (or that they are more interested in themselves than in me). Good communication skills are important.

After emailing and IM with someone for many times or hours...there's usually a point where we need to move to a phone conversation, as you can really gain some information about someone by phone. For me...a gentleman always gives his number first...and doesn't get upset if I want to block my number until I'm comfortable releasing it to him. After we've spoken on the phone the first time, I want him to tell me the "rules" for calling....times/days it's appropriate to call, etc....and let me know if he wants me to call again. I don't want to call him unless he welcomes my call.
3/1/2008 3:54:17 PM If someone wanted to get to know you, how should they go about it?  

singleagain50
Greenville, SC
age: 50

 I totally agree with both of you. You can tell a lot about someone by talking on the phone, plus I only type about 1 word every two minutes.
3/1/2008 5:28:26 PM If someone wanted to get to know you, how should they go about it?  

tom_alan
Pueblo, CO
age: 49

 singleagain -- that must have taken you a half hour to write what you did. And yes when both parties are comfortable by phone is the next step. I would not be offended if she did not want to give out her number at first. I have been on DHU for about a month and I feel that many of the women are being mistreated more so than men. JMO
3/2/2008 11:01:28 AM If someone wanted to get to know you, how should they go about it?  

alludreemof
Springfield, TN
age: 50

 1. You can wink and I will thank you...but sending me an email and talking back and forth is the best way you will get my attention. I'm a slow mover, I don't get all excited about someone contacting me until there seems to be a mutual conversation going on. Even then I sit back and enjoy getting to know that person and don't expect anything but friendship at that point. You can tell when someone clicks with you...just in how they conduct themselves in a conversation.

2. Sending email addys first out of the shoot tells me that you are looking for someone to play with. I'm not interested....I don't have the time.

3. If folks would read my profile they would get a real feel of who I am and what I hope for and know whether to approach me or NOT.

4. My blogs are geared to weed out those that are only here to play....or those that are not really interested in my lifestyle or personality. I try to be as honest as I can be so as to not waste anyone's time or efforts.

5. I don't accept friends request unless I talk for awhile in emails to see how the conversation flows. And I definitely don't talk about one friend to another.

6. My im's are shut off for a reason. The first few days I was here I got im's popping here and there but nothing was really said except lets talk by phone or on yahoo or whatever. I will turn them on when and if I think the occasion is right.

7. A great way to start with me is by making me laugh. That loosens the tension.
The journey you travel on the adventure you seek is just as important as the outcome.

Good thread! It could be helpful if folks will take the time to lay out their thoughts.

Dreem
3/2/2008 11:07:22 AM If someone wanted to get to know you, how should they go about it?  

ugot2bkidding02
Fort Walton Beach, FL
age: 50

 you all said some thing that were good thanks.
I feel if you want to talk to me be real don't try to impress me
ask me what is on my profile
tell me more about you
don't do the sexy flirt thing it won't work with me.
no i am not moving in with you on second chat
i work i make money i pay my bills dont ask me how much i make
if you got to compare me with your ex then your not over them move on please
3/2/2008 12:23:22 PM If someone wanted to get to know you, how should they go about it?  

dynadave
Federal Way, WA
age: 46

 I don't mind a wink to see if I am interested but if I wink or e mail you back please don't wink again. Send an e mail explaining what it is that caught your eye about my profile and common interests. I totally agree no photo don't bother. I don't consider my self good looking and I have a couple pics on my profile so you can see what I look like. If you dont it looks like you are hiding something. Ask me some questions about myself that you would like to know, and include the answers for yourself as if I was asking them back to you. (What kind of movies do you like? I like Sci-Fi Action/Adventure and Horror but a good drama can work as long as it is not a sad one.. etc.)I like to go with a few e mails then go to IM's for a more personal type conversation. I have even made "date" times to be on so we can im through this site. From there you can go to phone or meet somewhere.
I also agree with the comment don't leave your profile blank, tell me something about your self.

Dave
3/3/2008 4:51:03 PM If someone wanted to get to know you, how should they go about it?  

alludreemof
Springfield, TN
age: 50

 If someone even remotely reminded me of my ex on here...I would NOT be talking to them....lol! There would be no comparison...just the sound of CLICK!!!! HAhahaha...sorry had to say it!

Glad to see some of the fellas expressing themselves...hard to find that these days.



[Edited 3/3/2008 4:51:27 PM]
3/3/2008 4:58:07 PM If someone wanted to get to know you, how should they go about it?  

oldeschoolcharm
San Diego, CA
age: 46

 Just email me and ask all the questions you want.
3/3/2008 5:01:47 PM If someone wanted to get to know you, how should they go about it?  

txchk
Schertz, TX
age: 44

 just email me....
3/3/2008 5:42:38 PM If someone wanted to get to know you, how should they go about it?  

jimmy61
Titusville, FL
age: 46

 Just talk to me, leave the thesaurus on the shelf.
3/3/2008 6:04:52 PM If someone wanted to get to know you, how should they go about it?  

owensborogirl
Owensboro, KY
age: 44

 4 is good
5 and 6 are better. I believe everyone should go by these.
good reasons to me



[Edited 3/3/2008 6:05:10 PM]
3/3/2008 6:05:31 PM If someone wanted to get to know you, how should they go about it?  

thebestman
Alpharetta, GA
age: 34

 um ask questions

3/3/2008 7:09:54 PM If someone wanted to get to know you, how should they go about it?  

southerngent52
Park Forest, IL
age: 53

 I myself think if someone wants to meet me, you need to get to know them in person.You can email,chat, instant message someone,talk to each other on the phone and really not know how they are.I have done all four and when it comes to making plans to come see them,or meet them somewhere, something always comes up.Being with someone in person gives a better idea of how they are.Talk is cheap and easy to do,but being face to face you can learn a lot more about someone.



[Edited 3/3/2008 7:11:40 PM]