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Forums: Groups: Man Land: cleaning house,the man way.
11/6/2007 12:19:15 PM cleaning house,the man way.  

lostinwyoming
Evanston, WY
age: 50

 i bring in the leaf blower about twice a week and start at one end and blow everything thats not nailed down out the door,and the dish's, i take them to the car wash about once a month. ok guys any other house cleaning tips?
11/6/2007 12:35:35 PM cleaning house,the man way.  

skipaway
Bartlett, IL
age: 42

 Use Paper Plates,Solo cups, and plastic utensils
as often as possible,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

Fantastic is the only cleaner needed,

wait till the last tee-shirt is dirty
before doing laundry,,,,,,,,,,,
11/6/2007 12:59:26 PM cleaning house,the man way.  

boomer420s
Plains, MT
age: 25

 I just keep shoving shit against the walls until I can't walk through the house. When it gets that bad, I go find a woman, bring her home for a "romantic" evening. As soon as she walks in, she can't help but to clean. Works every time.
11/6/2007 1:02:08 PM cleaning house,the man way.  

dustin
Roseville, CA
age: 27

 Tarps, lots of tarps.
11/6/2007 1:08:06 PM cleaning house,the man way.  

copterdriver
Saint Matthews, SC
age: 55

 lol@ Dustin... never thought of that one...
11/13/2007 1:48:47 AM cleaning house,the man way.  

yankeeluvspeach
Athens, GA
age: 29

 hell with all of that.. I just take all the pets/momentos/photos out of the house, make sure I've got insurance and then burn that puppy down. FIRE FIRE.. huh huh.. FIRE. (sorry the beavis/butthead impression loses something in translation to text)
11/13/2007 4:28:19 PM cleaning house,the man way.  

chucky_t
Akron, IN
age: 60

 Live in a old style tent without a floor. When it gets dirty must move the tent. Worked for me for many years.
11/13/2007 6:12:36 PM cleaning house,the man way.  

iron_ranger
Owatonna, MN
age: 40

 im supposed to clean my house?????????????????????????????????
11/15/2007 8:03:59 PM cleaning house,the man way.  

wagon_hollow
Speedwell, TN
age: 61

 Maby my problem is my house is cleaner than the woman I date houses. Theirs no gendar to clean and theirs a lot of women that are bad at house work or only do a half ass job at it. I don't do the nick naks or dust collectors in my house and no carpet either just wood floors and their easy to clean. I use paper bowls, plates and plastic forks and spoons.
11/17/2007 11:45:54 AM cleaning house,the man way.  

ericr64
Mount Pleasant, MI
age: 43

 I was enjoying myself and then you caused me to look around my at my mess. Time to call one of my daughters.
11/21/2007 7:51:37 PM cleaning house,the man way.  

ollieottis
Traverse City, MI
age: 57

 i used to eat out a lot and keep the lights dim
11/25/2007 8:29:36 PM cleaning house,the man way.  

mrmack45
Brooklyn, MS
age: 46

 Hired a woman twice a week.wanted
12/3/2007 3:22:48 PM cleaning house,the man way.  

tomwcat
Traverse City, MI
age: 64

 I keep the mess to one room that way when company comes I can shut the door

12/6/2007 11:37:44 PM cleaning house,the man way.  

1old_goat
Lowry City, MO
age: 47

 A cleaning guide for men.

She is coming. To your place, for the very first time. You have very little time, because you figure she would not understand most haz-mat teams take at least 2 full weeks to do a thorough job. Soooo now what?

HELPFUL TIPS
1) Set up - rent a dumpster if you do not already have access to one. Find the most centrally located window, place dumpster underneath. This is not overkill.
2) You can buy new socks and underwear. Out the window.
3) There is no such thing as a decorative beer can. I don't care if it does have a lamp set in it.
4) Do not waste time trying to figure out what is still good in your refigerator. Start fresh.
5) If the garden hose will stretch into the bathroom, don't forget to remove electrical appliances first. There is usually one breaker dedicated to the bathroom. Consider coating all visible surfaces with a solvent first.
6) The laundromat will understand if you leave most of your cloths in their drier for a day or two.
7) Some specialty vets and kennels can handle snakes, rodents, and badgers. These are not pets to most women, even if she is an animal lover.
8)For bathroom and kitchen walls, paint will stick to most mildew, it only has to hold up for one visit. Choose something neutral, but watch out for pink tones, they will make you barf.
9) No matter how liberal she may seen now, remove all porn, even soft porn. She might not mention it now, but if a relationship ensues, it will likely come up again.
10) There is no time for cleaning carpets owing to a long dry time. Krylon dries in 30 minutes. Make sure you have tunes turned up a little so she won't ask about the crunchy sound.
11) If the budget allows, rent the fully furnished apartment next door.
12) Take the time to issue death threats or buy ball game tickets for any male friends that are likely to show up.
13) For any female friends that are likely to show up, fake your death. Plan a funeral for effect.
14) Take inventory of any furnature items that you owned in college. Don't forget to have the dumpster removed before she gets there.
15) IF you are one lucky son of a b*tch, you will plan for bed cloths. That doesn't mean pajamas, its like the cloth that's supposed to cover the matress and pillow cases. You know, like your mom had. They have those at Wal Marts over in the half of the store you never go. Don't buy the ones with flowers, even though its what she would buy, she will think you are a f*g. But don't do red.
16) Buy candles. They are romantic, and the more they stink, the less your place will. Be safe and buy all the same kind, men have no clue what smells actually 'clash'. A couple of dozen are usually enough. You don't want to look like a Shao Lihn monestary. Unless she is into Shao Lihn monestaries, or ever worked on a Sting video.
16) For God's sake don't cook.
17) throw out the phone, it has numbers programmed into it. Throw out phone books, black books, and any other substrate you commonly write phone numbers on. Be sure to write down your mother's number in a safe location, you will not remember it later.
18) discard anything brick or cinderblock that is not already a part of the foundation.
19) If you have a fish tank, buy some fish for it.
20) If you have any furnature left, several garbage bags will contain what is under the cushions. If you must sort, put the bags in mini storage for a later time.

Don't panic! Rome wasn't built in a day, but it burnt down in one. Enjoy your visit!