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8/23/2009 10:42:49 AM Is it easier for the men to let go than it is for a women?  
zalva
Lafayette Hill, PA
age: 61


Why is it than men move on much quicker than women? I lost my husband in a matter of a week and I couldn't go out to any function for about two years. I felt I was numb for a long long time!!!

8/23/2009 11:23:38 AM Is it easier for the men to let go than it is for a women?  

newdirection6
Wellsville, OH
age: 55


I have met several widowers and they go so far in a relationship and then they stop. They can't go any farther because they tell me they feel like they are cheating on their dead wife.

8/23/2009 11:24:38 AM Is it easier for the men to let go than it is for a women?  

djrw
Mount Laurel, NJ
age: 64


It isn't. It all depends on the relation. It took me several years to learn how to handle it. I have only recently stated to enter into the social world.

8/23/2009 10:24:17 PM Is it easier for the men to let go than it is for a women?  

bossjock1
Clovis, CA
age: 50


I would not be afraid to go all the way!!!!

8/30/2009 1:42:32 AM Is it easier for the men to let go than it is for a women?  
crgzero
Over 1,000 Posts (1,045)
Tulsa, OK
age: 35


Quote from zalva:
Why is it than men move on much quicker than women? I lost my husband in a matter of a week and I couldn't go out to any function for about two years. I felt I was numb for a long long time!!!


Broadly sweeping generalizations are for morons. Here's a better one for you, why do all women cheat?

By the way, I lost my wife 8 almost 9 years ago and I've just now started a relationship with someone that is actually more than a single date. And speaking of dates, I didn't start dating till last year at about this time.

9/10/2009 7:03:16 PM Is it easier for the men to let go than it is for a women?  

rickfromsticks
Van Buren, MO
age: 57


I'm sure it is different for everyone, but if you did generalize, I do think men "let go" quicker (not sure about easier) and it boils down to the old argument between the sexes. Women have always accused men of "not caring" or "being insensitive". There is something to that and I've always thought that is why men go to war and kill people, then return home and start a family. They compartmentalize life, they file work, home, sports, etc. into different files and women tie in every occurance to one network of memories. As difficult as it is, many men will say, "Well, I loved her until she was gone, but she's not coming back". That memory goes into a cabinet and they turn their attention to another file. I don't think that's wrong, but it's not the way a woman thinks.

My sister is trying to help me with the grieving process and she says for me to remember the "good times". I tried to tell her that my wife was sick for so long, those memories are very far from me. The horror of those last few days is all I can remember. She told me to "compartmentalize" those memories and put them away. That's when I told her that my wife had been training me for over 30 years to not do that. Now I don't know how to act. Go back to my insensitive ways (I used to be a rather cold person), or stay sensitive and keep struggling. I think it would be easier to just let go and file my entire experience into a file cabinet and start a new one. Does this make sense to anyone else? Or am I

9/11/2009 8:43:00 AM Is it easier for the men to let go than it is for a women?  

metalman26x
Temecula, CA
age: 26


It's been 5 years and I still feel FUBAR, I dont know any other widows or widowers my age but I'm pretty sure I'll feel this way till I die. I just have to learn how to deal with it. I play guitar now and it helps.

9/11/2009 8:48:13 AM Is it easier for the men to let go than it is for a women?  

lovethelake17
Over 2,000 Posts (2,190)
Henderson, NV
age: 50


I don't think either sex lets go faster than the other. It's all up to the individual. And do you really ever let go? You may move on, you may find a new love, you may be happy and content again, but you'll always love that person, you'll always wonder 'what if'. You tuck them away in your heart, where they'll always be, and make room for the next one you love. The heart is pretty elastic, it can hold a lot of love.



[Edited 9/11/2009 8:49:03 AM PST]