Dealing with my efing daughters "holiday dada"!! *RantinG*

9/6/2009 11:19:50 AM	Dealing with my efing daughters "holiday dada"!! RantinG
mommyhelene Rancho Cordova, CA age: 23	I want to apologize ahead of time, Im extremely frustrated and can't do anything about it!! I want to fu$%n cry!! I love the guy dearly "as a friend", in the beginning of being a single parent we went through some arguing about were my daughter was going to stay; He thought just because he is the other parent he has a lot of rights. "will not when the baby is breast feeding 24 7 and she was only 2 months old, will the first year was tough I couldn't even stand being around him. His main part of his family took my side, "said to him that he is efing up not being and his kids life". Will this past year since she has turn one last halloween, he told me at her b-day that he wants to be more involved life; I said "that awesome I will believe it when it happens"! will since the b-day party, he has maybe seen her a total of 3 times once on "his own"!! She kinda has an idea of who he is, and she tries calling him in leaving messages "yes my 2 year old knows how to talk to others over a phone lol". he hasn't made initiative to call back, and on his myspace he has "a new car will used". Im extremely frustrated for one he hasn't made a payment too the state because now he owes the state, he hasn't bought a box of diapers since we were living together. we talked about eventually, making it were he makes payments straight to me for are daughter. I know he hasn't had a decent job "he works for his granny who enables the guy"; he also knows that Im going back 2 school and have to rely on the bus system out here in sacramento that you really can't rely on. Im just beyond frustrated and peeved, Im waiting to hear back on some paper work from the state; they take their sweet time errrrrrr Meet singles in your area here at DateHookup.dating, we're 100% free for everything! Join now!
9/6/2009 12:08:29 PM	Dealing with my efing daughters "holiday dada"!! RantinG
rantinreddbeanz Yazoo City, MS age: 42	Darlin', first off take urself a great big breath an let it out real slow. I know exactly what ur goin thru. I've been dealin with my 10 yr old's father's stoopidity since the day the child was born. I've learned a few things along the way. You can't force a man to be father. They will do everything within their power if they truly want to without any encouragement. That includes spendin time with them an helpin to provide for them. You do what you need to do in order to take of ur daughter an urself. I pat u on the back for goin to school an furtherin ur education. The struggles ur dealin with in order to do that will benefit u an ur daughter in the end. It'll all be worth it. Your child picks up on much more than u realize. Don't bad mouth him or argue with him in her presence. She will form her own opinions 'bout him without help. When she's older an begins askin questions be open an honest with her. My son has asked 'bout his father an I simply told him that he's unable to be a father to him. It was left at that. Love her an treasure her cause quite frankly, U got the better end of the deal. One day she's gonna look back on the struggles u went thru as her Mom an she's gonna love u all the more. Keep ur head up an keep doin what u need to do.
9/6/2009 1:46:06 PM	Dealing with my efing daughters "holiday dada"!! RantinG
mommyhelene Rancho Cordova, CA age: 23	ty, ya No I'm tired of being let down myself lol. I believe justice will prevail no matter what situation it is; Im taking this karma not to own but to shine some light in my life. And when I do finally get my cosmetology license "which I have the hunger for"; things won't be perfect It will be more livable. and i won't have to depend on assistance as much, and be able to carry my own weight. add on: i know exactly what you mean by don't bad mouth your ex in front of the kid; I have been upset, but when my daughter came up to console me "I held her and expressed that her dad is a good guy, and don't let anyone tell you other wise". [Edited 9/6/2009 1:49:08 PM PST]
9/6/2009 1:49:25 PM	Dealing with my efing daughters "holiday dada"!! RantinG
rantinreddbeanz Yazoo City, MS age: 42	Keep the positive energy an good things will come your way. Just remember all the struggles will be worth it in the end
9/8/2009 5:03:03 PM	Dealing with my efing daughters "holiday dada"!! RantinG
lopita03 Odessa, TX age: 21	ai girl i know how u feel. im gng trow alll that. my babys daddy doesn't even given me for a gallon of milk not now not even when i was pregnant. sad but true. he doesn't bother to call to see how his son is dng or is he eating right does he have a roff on top of him -or nothing. he just wants to go out with different girls and party his a** off. i so want him to give me his rights so i don't have to call him for any event on my son's life.
9/8/2009 7:58:40 PM	Dealing with my efing daughters "holiday dada"!! RantinG
glas123 Union City, PA age: 38	Sorry to say, but you will most likely be dealing with his crap for a long while. I agree with rantinredd, you got the best part of the deal. Enjoy every moment you can with her. It is his loss. The tough part will be being an emotional support for your daughter when she realizes that he isn't there for her. I still have to hear about all the emotional crap my ex dumps on her daughter (my step-daughter and I still talk on the phone a couple times a month). Just be there for your daughter. Good luck.
9/9/2009 5:13:10 PM	Dealing with my efing daughters "holiday dada"!! RantinG
mommyhelene Rancho Cordova, CA age: 23	yep yep, I have given that guy way too many chances. His mother who actually can relate with me, still enables him. god, will I have tried many times to just suit up and show up in put his effort inn; since he isn't he will be paying out of his toosh. I guess thats what he gets for putting more effort into his friends than his daughter humm oh will... Ya I think she will thank me one day, I won't expect it anytime soon.. because I still haven't thanked my mother "different situation"; Im sure it will be their.
9/9/2009 7:41:51 PM	Dealing with my efing daughters "holiday dada"!! RantinG
rsccc3 Athens, GA age: 40	i am and have been going thru this with my childs father, i always made the call to him are you coming to see our child this weekend? it always ended with yes, and a time , well when that day rolled around we would sit for hrs upon hrs waiting and him be a no show then the next week i would make the same call again , only to end up like the last , i finally gave up, the child is 9 1/2 yrs old now, we ran into him a yr ago and the only way he could get them to talk to him was to try and bribe the child, only to again disappoint, i have had my child( yes i think i deserve to say my child) in counseling , do as much to be both parents, even my family members have stepped up and taken on that fatherly role without being asked, ( not once have i spoken a harsh or degrading word about the childs father . and when asked i tell all that i think they should know that he was a good man when i was married to him, he did care for us then, but i am very honest with the my child and as for the now questions do u think he wonders about me, i answer with i hope and pray that he does, i have even asked if my child wants me to try and contact their father, the answer is no ,for a 9 1/2 yr old child , very smart told me he is my father but has never been my dad, my grandpa and uncle are more of a dad to me now) i have contacted many lawyers and have been told that the childs choice now if they want contact , so i leave it at that,,,, all i can say is good luck , and give your child unconditional love, and when those questions arise and they will, dont talk the other parent down, tell them about what you do remember when you were together the good , never mention the bad) its hard and there will be times you want to scream out what really happened , dont just remember that good thoughts are what this child needs and if when they get older if they feel the need to find that missing parent then they can relate what was told to them all the good that went on for what ever time, and that as much as i hate to say it will sting more than salt in wound for the absent parent to know they missed so much happiness that they missed the skinned knees , the first date, the first driving lesson, the first job, the first heartbreak... sorry i rambled but this brought up so much and is so close to what i have been dealing with for 9 1/2 yrs...

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