2/14/2010 11:11:22 PM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
tcpco1616
Wellsboro, PA
age: 40
|
MEN ARE JUST HAPPIER PEOPLE* - What do you expect from such simple creatures?
Your last name stays put.
The garage is all yours.
Wedding plans take care of themselves.
Chocolate is just another snack.
You can never be pregnant.
You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.
You can wear NO shirt to a water park..
Car mechanics tell you the truth.
The world is your urinal.
You never have to drive to another petrol station toilet because this one is
just too icky.
You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt. Same
work, more pay.
Wrinkles add character.
Wedding dress 2000. Morning-suit rental-100.
People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.
The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected.
New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
One mood all the time.
Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
You know stuff about tanks.
A five-day holiday requires only one suitcase.
You can open all your own jars.
You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.
Your underwear is £4.95 for a three-pack.
Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
You almost never have strap problems in public.
You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
Everything on your face stays its original color.
The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
You only have to shave your face and neck.
You can play with toys all your life.
One wallet and one pair of shoes one color for all seasons.
You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.
You can 'do' your nails with a pocket knife..
You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache..
You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.
No wonder men are happier.
NICKNAMES:
*If Laura, Kate and Sarah go out for lunch, they will call each other
Laura, Kate and Sarah.
If Mike, Dave and John go out, they will affectionately refer to each other
as Fat Boy, Godzilla and Four-eyes.
EATING OUT:
*When the bill arrives, Mike, Dave and John will each throw in $20, even
though it's only for 32.50. ........None of them will have anything
smaller and none will actually admit they want change back.
When the girls get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.
MONEY:
*A man will pay $2 for a 1 item he needs.
A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need but it's on sale.
BATHROOMS:
*A man has six items in his bathroom: toothbrush and toothpaste, shaving
cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel from M&S.
The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 337.
A man would not be able to identify more than 20 of these items.
ARGUMENTS:
*A woman has the last word in any argument.
Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
CATS:
*Women love cats.
Men say they love cats, but when women aren't looking, men kick cats.
FUTURE:
*A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
SUCCESS:
*A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
MARRIAGE
*A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, but she does.
DRESSING UP:
*A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the bins,
answer the phone, read a book, and get the post.
A man will dress up for weddings and funerals.
NATURAL:
*Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.
Women somehow deteriorate during the night.
OFFSPRING:
*Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children. .........She knows
about dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favorite foods,
secret fears and hopes and dreams.
A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.
Meet singles at DateHookup.dating, we're 100% free! Join now!
|
2/15/2010 2:05:58 AM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
bill71951
Saltsburg, PA
age: 59
|
I have to agree with all but the last one.
We get all that and you get multiple org**ms. Not sure who wins here.
|
2/15/2010 2:20:04 AM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
inkedbod
Erie, PA
age: 46
|
great to be a man !!!
|
2/15/2010 2:25:36 AM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
mowboss54
Springdale, PA
age: 63
|
pphhhhfftt
|
2/15/2010 2:45:07 AM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
inkedbod
Erie, PA
age: 46
|
penis envy ??????
|
2/15/2010 3:02:13 AM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
gem4gent
Saylorsburg, PA
age: 43
|
o my god your to much.
|
2/15/2010 3:04:03 AM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
inkedbod
Erie, PA
age: 46
|
|
2/15/2010 5:10:53 AM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
kym64
Wilkes Barre, PA
age: 46
|
yeah he is toooo much
|
2/15/2010 5:33:27 AM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
scubablue118
Abington, PA
age: 54
|
Don't you suppose that we might be happier just because we kept it simple?
|
2/15/2010 5:37:57 AM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
kym64
Wilkes Barre, PA
age: 46
|
Oh BB what a can of worms
|
2/15/2010 5:38:10 AM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
forever824
Mountville, PA
age: 50
|
couldn't have said it any better scuba !
|
2/15/2010 5:38:57 AM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
stumppy
Bath, PA
age: 64
|
Men forget, but never forgive.
Women forgive, but never forget.
and love to remind men, by saying, :
"I forgive you darling, but do you remember when you....."
and he stands there scratchin his head, " thinkin', "what the F is she talkin' about?"
[Edited 2/15/2010 5:41:16 AM ]
|
2/15/2010 5:39:16 AM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
kym64
Wilkes Barre, PA
age: 46
|
Will you truly intelligent men teach me how to keep it simple?
|
2/15/2010 5:41:26 AM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
forever824
Mountville, PA
age: 50
|
Will you truly intelligent men teach me how to keep it simple?
I'd love to sweetie, but I'm far from being intelligent !
|
2/15/2010 5:42:29 AM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
kym64
Wilkes Barre, PA
age: 46
|
Is this a 12 step program?
|
2/15/2010 5:42:51 AM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
inkedbod
Erie, PA
age: 46
|
scuba !! you are on to something !!!
|
2/15/2010 5:46:41 AM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
scubablue118
Abington, PA
age: 54
|
Oh, don't come off with that pre-eminence thing Scarlet.
For starters, go to the magazine store and look at the women's magazines and tell me what they are saying.
The conundrum lies in the inability to juxtapose the messages.
-How a woman can look her best
-How, no matter how hard you try, will ever, ever, look as good as the airbrushed model on the cover. Or page 36.
-How men are a**holes
-How to find the right man
-What to do with him when you find him
You explain that to me and you have won me over.
|
2/15/2010 5:55:54 AM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
inkedbod
Erie, PA
age: 46
|
they know all the answers !!!
they like to play dumb !!
|
2/15/2010 6:00:18 AM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
kym64
Wilkes Barre, PA
age: 46
|
Aint nothin dumb about this blonde , darling!
|
2/15/2010 6:00:49 AM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
stumppy
Bath, PA
age: 64
|
Women need a dozen 12 step programs.
Just for the initiation
[Edited 2/15/2010 6:02:10 AM ]
|
2/15/2010 6:03:10 AM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
inkedbod
Erie, PA
age: 46
|
hi ! my name is kym and i'm a blonde !!
hi kym !!
|
2/15/2010 6:05:05 AM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
kym64
Wilkes Barre, PA
age: 46
|
Step 1....I forgive all you men for being SIMPLE
|
2/15/2010 6:06:38 AM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
inkedbod
Erie, PA
age: 46
|
simple pleasures for simple minds !!!
simple is as simple does !!!
|
2/15/2010 9:27:38 AM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
blindndeaf
Wellsville, PA
age: 35
|
men are just happier in general,,,I mean women could never find bliss with a power saw and a hammer,,,nope they need,,,,wine and roses,,,and diamonds and oh geez maybe its all those sappy romance novels they read..
|
2/15/2010 9:32:04 AM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
kym64
Wilkes Barre, PA
age: 46
|
HEY YOU!!!! I'm a happy woman that can fix her own SHIT while wine tasting and stopping to smell the roses!!!
|
2/15/2010 9:35:03 AM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
blindndeaf
Wellsville, PA
age: 35
|
see thats the thing,,,,,,,if it aint broke we still find bliss in fixin it....women sit and wonder why the hell it still works in the first place and then get depressed because it doesnt do what it originally was designed for....re the beer tap on the washing machine,,,,
|
2/15/2010 9:41:01 AM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
kym64
Wilkes Barre, PA
age: 46
|
And thats the reason God created the MAN CAVE
|
2/15/2010 9:47:21 AM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
scubablue118
Abington, PA
age: 54
|
Step 1....I forgive all you men for being SIMPLE
oh c'mon; forgive? women are blessed that we are so easy to figure out, please, and that we have very few buttons to push and women can find them blindfolded.
Men, on the other hand, focus on things that go vroom and sports with balls because we can understand them. Trust me when I say, we have, as a gender, have given up on even putting forth an effort to understand women.
|
2/15/2010 9:52:54 AM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
chicklets102
North Wales, PA
age: 59
|
just as all men are different ... so are woman.
we can't clump them together in one mass.
Granted it can take a woman an hour or more (depending on the woman) to ready and face her public whereas a man can do it in 5-10 minutes.
|
2/15/2010 9:55:39 AM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
scubablue118
Abington, PA
age: 54
|
maybe the slow ones take that long.
|
2/15/2010 9:57:17 AM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
kym64
Wilkes Barre, PA
age: 46
|
Oh please BB...I have given up trying to understand. Just roll with it
|
2/15/2010 9:58:54 AM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
scubablue118
Abington, PA
age: 54
|
Scarlet, when we say, uh-huh or yes dear, that is exactly what we are doing. Rolling with it.
|
2/15/2010 10:01:08 AM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
kym64
Wilkes Barre, PA
age: 46
|
And I spent 20 years with a YES DEAR...a man should show some brass balls now and then.
|
2/15/2010 10:01:58 AM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
stumppy
Bath, PA
age: 64
|
If you have the sad duty of going to anacquaintences funeral, the men will either praise the person, or mock the short comings, but end up stating they were an OK person. On the other hand women will gush about the deceased and will end the conversation mockin the shortcomings, and then say, "we need to do lunch soon. It's been too long."
|
2/15/2010 10:14:19 AM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
chicklets102
North Wales, PA
age: 59
|
Stumpy ... and I thought women were the bitter ones.
Guess you haven't kept company with the right women.
|
2/15/2010 10:17:57 AM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
scubablue118
Abington, PA
age: 54
|
And I spent 20 years with a YES DEAR...a man should show some brass balls now and then.
there are those that clang when they walk, but you have to look or listen closely.
|
2/15/2010 10:18:38 AM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
stumppy
Bath, PA
age: 64
|
probably why, they get nervous around me, and skeedaddle. I have a habit of expressing things how I see 'em. And when they can't easily change my opinion, they quit and find someone more amenable to their thinking.
|
2/15/2010 10:22:50 AM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
mowboss54
Springdale, PA
age: 63
|
UUUMMMMM Hey guys. Knock it off on us women. Try going back to the first book of the bible. Says something about God making man and deciding he needed company. He took one of Adams ribs to make woman. He didn't exactly tell him that he was placing her there to drive him buggy. So if you want to complain go talk to your maker.
|
2/15/2010 10:25:06 AM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
chicklets102
North Wales, PA
age: 59
|
Mow ... do you think they want their rib back?
|
2/15/2010 10:26:17 AM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
stumppy
Bath, PA
age: 64
|
don't do no good, we've been b*tchin, ever since He put Ma Nature in charge.
[Edited 2/15/2010 10:28:02 AM ]
|
2/15/2010 10:29:40 AM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
mowboss54
Springdale, PA
age: 63
|
Mow ... do you think they want their rib back?
Chici do you think they would want it bbq'd
|
2/15/2010 10:51:38 AM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
blindndeaf
Wellsville, PA
age: 35
|
oh puuuhhleeease...really...just smoke the bugger and we will be happy to baste it in beer upon its return..
|
2/15/2010 11:27:20 AM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
kym64
Wilkes Barre, PA
age: 46
|
I think you need to switch to bran flakes and beer..your cheerios are a bit pissy
|
2/15/2010 11:29:09 AM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
scubablue118
Abington, PA
age: 54
|
Mow ... do you think they want their rib back?
maybe there are those that want their spine back
|
2/15/2010 11:30:06 AM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
kym64
Wilkes Barre, PA
age: 46
|
yes dear
|
2/15/2010 11:30:55 AM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
inkedbod
Erie, PA
age: 46
|
i wanna have a couple ribs removed !!!
i hear ya don't need a woman after that !!!
|
2/15/2010 11:33:58 AM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
blindndeaf
Wellsville, PA
age: 35
|
haaaaa dont forget to get the implants too inky then ya will have all ya need,,,,
|
2/15/2010 11:35:44 AM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
kym64
Wilkes Barre, PA
age: 46
|
yeah and I want a body like the girl on the cover of Cosmo!
|
2/15/2010 11:37:43 AM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
inkedbod
Erie, PA
age: 46
|
marilyn hasn't been on the cover of cosmo in years ??
|
2/15/2010 11:41:30 AM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
stumppy
Bath, PA
age: 64
|
Someone found the opening of the mancave, hope he keeps exploring !
|
2/15/2010 11:46:42 AM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
blindndeaf
Wellsville, PA
age: 35
|
you already have the body of a teenager what more do you want kymy...inky i got my hacksaw ready lets git those ribs out for ya,,,be nice and ya might get a lolipop
|
2/15/2010 11:51:10 AM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
mowboss54
Springdale, PA
age: 63
|
well now that the screen is covered in leftover lima bean soup could we not talk about lolipops
|
2/15/2010 11:52:53 AM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
scubablue118
Abington, PA
age: 54
|
lollipops?
touch upon a sweet spot there for you Mow?
|
2/15/2010 11:56:49 AM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
kym64
Wilkes Barre, PA
age: 46
|
lollipops?
touch upon a sweet spot there for you Mow?
my sweet spot was touched
|
2/15/2010 11:59:05 AM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
inkedbod
Erie, PA
age: 46
|
those local farm hands are good at what they do !!
|
2/15/2010 12:01:27 PM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
kym64
Wilkes Barre, PA
age: 46
|
keeps me occupied until------->
|
2/15/2010 12:05:47 PM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
inkedbod
Erie, PA
age: 46
|
fake it till ya make it !!!!
|
2/15/2010 12:08:22 PM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
mowboss54
Springdale, PA
age: 63
|
get in the damn truck dumbass
|
2/15/2010 12:10:33 PM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
inkedbod
Erie, PA
age: 46
|
mow your close !!!! that truck can find your house !!!!!
|
2/15/2010 12:15:24 PM |
This is So True..Men are Happier People |
|
mowboss54
Springdale, PA
age: 63
|
GPS says go East young man , not south
|