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2/2/2008 6:29:45 PM Parenting techniques & new relationships  

tsylos
Tasmania
Australia
age: 49


This topic may have been dealt with before...so I apologise in advance if it has....

When you find your new partners, how would you cope if their parenting styles are different to ours?

2/3/2008 8:54:38 AM Parenting techniques & new relationships  

lars38
Silvis, IL
age: 38


Everyones parenting styles are a little different .You just have to decide if the values are the same and thats how you want youre children raised.

2/4/2008 6:16:33 PM Parenting techniques & new relationships  

dg1260
Galion, OH
age: 47


tsylos, I guess it depends on whose kids they are. Children, especially older ones, will resent you if you walk into their lives and try to take over the parent position. You really have to work at being a role model and a friend.

Instead of: You know you are not allowed to do that. OR No, I won't let you do that.

You need to: Hey, I don't want to see you in trouble with your mom. You know she gets up set with that.

Anyway, if they are not yours, you have to leave the real parenting up to the other partner. Doesn't mean you can't get close to them.

2/5/2008 6:59:57 AM Parenting techniques & new relationships  

gutthans
Deland, FL
age: 56


Excellent question; common issue. Style is only a problem for 3 basic reasons:

1. It's not immediately sensible to the trainees (children).
2. It often can 'appear' to be in conflict with the primary parent.
3. It doesn't actually 'work'.

What are the fundamental goals and values of each party?
Does the 'style' actually promote the expected values?
Does the 'style' do a better or worse job than your own?
Does the 'style' have any 'unintended' drawbacks?

Truly answering your question involves considering a number of situational and historical variables. It is safe to say, however, that if mutual respect and support are inherent in the blending of the 2 styles...you'll be OK.