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2/20/2008 10:41:20 PM Why all the excuses, example:  

ctrybunny
Brighton, CO
age: 48


Did you ever realize how many excuses come up when we divorce:
I don't love you anymore, but I care.
You need to give me my space.
Its just not working out we don't have anything in common anymore.
You never put me first in the relationship.
Its best for the Children ?????
OR I just want out...You deserve better.
OR I don't want to hurt you but its best we go our separate ways.
OR you cheated on me.
While, I was reading these group topic I thought I would ask WHY?
What comes to your mind Just Curious? Am I the only one feeling a little empty and why does it hurt so bad...Does it the feeling go away

2/22/2008 6:43:29 PM Why all the excuses, example:  

skyblueeyes1
Galesburg, IL
age: 58


My response to your last question is: yes, it does stop hurting and life does go on, happily. Time is the best healer and forgiveness.

2/23/2008 9:26:56 PM Why all the excuses, example:  

anniebug
Tulsa, OK
age: 50


What I find amazing is that we think there is only one excuse for the divorce. While CK was going through alochol rehab, a chaplin told us that it was the little things that pile up and cause the end of a marriage. Looking back, I have to agree. I did not give up on CK just because he went back to drinking. It was just the one big thing with all the little things. And yes that feeling goes away with time. You help it by letting go of the anger and the hurt.

2/23/2008 9:45:36 PM Why all the excuses, example:  

ctrybunny
Brighton, CO
age: 48


Thanks ladies, Your wisdom is most appreciated.

2/27/2008 12:02:24 PM Why all the excuses, example:  

mindyb
Bloomington, IL
age: 42


I just handed him a Custom shirt that says "My Mother Gave Birth to a Dumbass" and got the f*ck out. I have a lot of love for the man but after so much of my dedication being assumed there is a time when it's done...no more.So i figure if he is not man enough to hold onto what he has...he's a dumbass....I am being a smartass just in case your wondering!

2/27/2008 2:12:57 PM Why all the excuses, example:  

dn2erth
Sunbury, OH
age: 54


One person cannot make a marriage work. I finally woke up and realized that things were not going to get better. At least I know I did my best. You'll feel better. You already do a little don't ya!

3/1/2008 8:23:22 PM Why all the excuses, example:  

marv71
Delhi, IA
age: 36


The excuses are just that, excuses, nothing that can't be worked out together with mutual effort. But each spouse has to WANT to work it out. It is troubling how the tables can turn. I initiated my divorce from my spouse for some very lame reasons, there were no serious troubles in our marriage, only my lack of interest to build the bridges and commit to the growing process. I looked outside the marriage as if i could create a better life with someone new. So I gave up on my commitment to find a "better woman" I was seeing only through my rose colored glasses. What I failed to realize was that my marriage really was as good as it gets. It has taken me three years after the divorce to finally realize the full error of my decision. The pain I inflicted on my loving wife when I let her go was my fault alone. The pain and regret of the life I gave up has recently consumed me. I am slowly healing now and finding my strength again, but how I would go back 4 years and build on the life I had. But that is over and all i can do is move on from here. I only hope that any spouse who is considering divorce will please give the marriage a fresh look. Do anything possible to build the bridges and grow together. There are a lot of life experiences that brought you to marriage. Build on those and create new ones together. Don't just give up as I did.

3/2/2008 4:39:35 PM Why all the excuses, example:  

adelinesmother
Fremont, NE
age: 37


i look at it this way, when someone gives you an excuse to get out of a relationship...dont take it personally, because its prob not even the truth.