9/8/2008 6:15:31 PM |
headache and heartache all in one! |
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lue1488
Upper Marlboro, MD
age: 20
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I normally don't do this but I want to see what others would say.....
Me and my ex still got strong feelings for each other she held me down when I had nothing!!! And everything is good but we can't stop argueing! We break up and then get back together and everything is good until the next arguement and we keep doing the same thing. So I break it up and after 2 months I still want her. she tells me everday she is waiting for the day I go back with her, but I don't want to go back through that same headache!!!! I'm miserable with and without her!!!! What should I do?
If you say talk to other people I have about three chicks I talk to but something is holding me back from getting serious with anyone I them!!!!
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9/8/2008 7:15:41 PM |
headache and heartache all in one! |
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awakeing
Walled Lake, MI
age: 36
|
Well if you both love each other and know this than your only problem is one of
communication. So put a smile on your face, this can be fixed!
Now roll up your sleeves and get ready to do the work!
Yes this means it's like learning how to talk all over again but only this time with
purpose and understanding. You can't fix something till you understand it and when you
do you both will be better people and happy in your love. Good Luck I wish you well!
Books:
Emotional Intelligence: Why it can matter more than IQ By: Daniel Goleman
Why Good People Do Bad Things By: James Hollis Ph.D
The Dance of Anger By: Harriet G Lerner Ph.D
Web Sites:
www.earthlingcommunication.com
www.unrealities.com/essays/relation.htm
http://www.helpguide.org/mental/improve_relationships.htm
http://psychcentral.com/lib/2006/agreeing-to-disagree-overcoming-communication-conundrums-in-your-relationship/
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9/8/2008 7:17:15 PM |
headache and heartache all in one! |
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crispy_kritter
Gloucester, ON
age: 33
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Dude! Ask yourself this one question. Are you doing the same thing over and over but expecting different results. You have you make a decision. Either get the hell away and stay away. Or decide that it is worth trying to work it out with this lady. What I mean buy work it out is GET COUPLE THERAPY before you end up arrested because of a "domestic dispute". I'm not kidding you'll be REALLY sorry when and not if that happens.
Us guys got to stick together sometimes. I know what I'm talking about on this one.
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9/8/2008 7:22:09 PM |
headache and heartache all in one! |
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evileddy
Ottawa, ON
age: 35
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Is the argument always about the same topic?
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9/8/2008 8:20:43 PM |
headache and heartache all in one! |
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chrislyn
La Porte, TX
age: 34
|
I can relate and I hate to tell ya, it sounds like you two are probably in love. We are all capable of physically dating other people but when you do that and you are really pre-occupied with you-know-who then, well, you-know-what. And what's really screwed up, you can say whatever....you can ignore each other...you can dream up all these evil things the other one is doing...but if you are really in love, both of you are secretly miserable. I don't know what your issues are. The issues I have had to deal with are dousies. If you guys are just bickering, you need to stop and learn how to talk to each other better. Counseling would be good. Take a short break from each other. My ex liked to critique everything I did (he knew the BEST way) so I got to where I would drift to the other side of the yard and he'd ask why. I'd tell him so I would not have to listen to him. Some things will drive you crazy. You have to let the other one know what they are.
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9/8/2008 8:30:14 PM |
headache and heartache all in one! |
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tater79
Springfield, IL
age: 29
|
I normally don't do this but I want to see what others would say.....
Me and my ex still got strong feelings for each other she held me down when I had nothing!!! And everything is good but we can't stop argueing! We break up and then get back together and everything is good until the next arguement and we keep doing the same thing. So I break it up and after 2 months I still want her. she tells me everday she is waiting for the day I go back with her, but I don't want to go back through that same headache!!!! I'm miserable with and without her!!!! What should I do?
If you say talk to other people I have about three chicks I talk to but something is holding me back from getting serious with anyone I them!!!!
It's called a concinous(miss-spelled ) The only then I can say is both of you have to be honest with each other and Communication is key.... A real man can accept when he is wrong and change for the better and a real woman, the same thing. Ya'll just got be open and say what is own each other minds, and figure out if ya'll can compromise if you can't, or if both of you are not open and communicate well WITHOUT yelling then a good relationship will never have a chance to work... JMO Good luck
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9/8/2008 8:36:16 PM |
headache and heartache all in one! |
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fredricko
Pico Rivera, CA
age: 49
|
I normally don't do this but I want to see what others would say.....
Me and my ex still got strong feelings for each other she held me down when I had nothing!!! And everything is good but we can't stop argueing! We break up and then get back together and everything is good until the next arguement and we keep doing the same thing. So I break it up and after 2 months I still want her. she tells me everday she is waiting for the day I go back with her, but I don't want to go back through that same headache!!!! I'm miserable with and without her!!!! What should I do?
If you say talk to other people I have about three chicks I talk to but something is holding me back from getting serious with anyone I them!!!!
everytime you fight and leave and go back the love will lessen till its gone,you may love her and her you but not enough to sacrifice the reasons for the arguments
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9/8/2008 8:43:57 PM |
headache and heartache all in one! |
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lue1488
Upper Marlboro, MD
age: 20
|
I just want to say thanks first off for the advice and help. And I do try and comunicate but like the dude said we started getting crazy then I ended up driving away before I do something I regret....and everbody is right we need to comunicate better but when your not angry its so easy but I admit I have a very bad attitude and all that goes out the window!!! Maybe we do need therapy or I need anger management! LOL
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9/8/2008 9:09:20 PM |
headache and heartache all in one! |
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fallnstar
Miami, FL
age: 48
|
Well if you both love each other and know this than your only problem is one of
communication. So put a smile on your face, this can be fixed!
Now roll up your sleeves and get ready to do the work!
Yes this means it's like learning how to talk all over again but only this time with
purpose and understanding. You can't fix something till you understand it and when you
do you both will be better people and happy in your love. Good Luck I wish you well!
Books:
Emotional Intelligence: Why it can matter more than IQ By: Daniel Goleman
Why Good People Do Bad Things By: James Hollis Ph.D
The Dance of Anger By: Harriet G Lerner Ph.D
Web Sites:
www.earthlingcommunication.com
www.unrealities.com/essays/relation.htm
http://www.helpguide.org/mental/improve_relationships.htm
http://psychcentral.com/lib/2006/agreeing-to-disagree-overcoming-communication-conundrums-in-your-relationship/
Great advise
Good luck OP, Don't give up...
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9/8/2008 9:21:48 PM |
headache and heartache all in one! |
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neverest
Greensboro, NC
age: 27
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im going threw the same thing with my wife but im the one trying to get her back.best advice take a look at your self and see what your doing wrong and improve it.see a counsouler if you need 2.
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9/8/2008 9:46:45 PM |
headache and heartache all in one! |
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lue1488
Upper Marlboro, MD
age: 20
|
Ya man I hear that and I know the problem with me I just read to much into shit and blow off without thinking and then she just pushes every little thing to the edge where I can't take it!!! I don't know I'm confused....I meet a new chick everday and this one chick is on my dam mind!!!! Dam r&b songs!!!!! LOL j/p
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9/9/2008 6:45:15 AM |
headache and heartache all in one! |
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foxy_woman_49
Omaha, NE
age: 50
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sounds like its time to move on
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9/9/2008 6:56:31 AM |
headache and heartache all in one! |
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susansheart839
Port Saint Lucie, FL
age: 60
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You two have a classic relationship called addicted to each other. Even though you are not compatable, you have lots of history together and that history is what is making you not think of your future without each other. If it was a good relationship, you would still be together and there would not be any roller coaster days. You know what I mean. But you are addicted to the drama of your relationship with her and she is addicted to you in the same way.
I would suggest that you stay away from each other for 6 months. Find inner peace, that one thing that has been evading you all these years. Find the love within yourself. Seek counseling to understand why you are doing this to yourself. It's the drama.
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