10/19/2008 9:20:13 PM |
i need advice or opinions please?!? (its kinda long too) |
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lnl1107
Florence, MS
age: 24
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so i met this guy and we became friends and i started to develope feelings for him and i told him but he said that he did not want a relationship right now cause of his job cause he works 47 days and is home for 15 days and his ex cheated on him while he was at work and it really messed him up~ i asked him if he did want a relationship did i have a chance with him and he said yes~ and he told one of my friends that maybe in the future we could maybe be together~ we text everyday that he is gone and while he is home we hang out some~ ok this is the part i am confused on~ when we talk he is always asking where i am at who i am with~ have i done anything else with another guy~ kinda like he is concerned on what i am doing~ but he also talks about finding him a hook-up and all that~ cause he said that is all he wants right now is to play the field~ and one min. he is flirting his a** off with me and the next he dont really pay that much attention to me~ my question is do i just get over him and come to the conclusion that we wont be anything else besides friends or should i hang on to that little bit of hope that we could maybe together in the future ( and no i will not wait around on him if someone else comes along then great that is just going to be his loss) WHAT DO I DO??? so if anyone has any advice i would so appreciate it
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10/19/2008 9:31:35 PM |
i need advice or opinions please?!? (its kinda long too) |
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km1004
Goodyear, AZ
age: 32
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I don't understand this question,I read it twice.....sounds like you already know the answer...
also,again maybe I am not reading this right but you said you wont stay with it until someone else comes along but it sounds like its what hes doing to you.I don't know him so I am not judging but I have a few friends that do the same thing as he does,Wouldn't surprise me if you were not the only one hes with.Refer to the topic on players....
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10/19/2008 9:33:18 PM |
i need advice or opinions please?!? (its kinda long too) |
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rexydon
Lenexa, KS
age: 23 online now!
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If he is just wanting to play the fields then you should do the same. JMO
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10/19/2008 9:37:23 PM |
i need advice or opinions please?!? (its kinda long too) |
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lnl1107
Florence, MS
age: 24
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sorry the question is confusing and kinda didnt make any sense but i really didnt know how else to word it
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10/19/2008 9:38:23 PM |
i need advice or opinions please?!? (its kinda long too) |
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indoubt
Beaumont, CA
age: 33 online now!
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Who wants to be with a back and forth like that? He sounds weird and controlling like he wants to control you while he roams free. I winder what he would do if you were with another man. I say lose him and the games it doesnt seem like you could have any kind of stable relationship with him. Dont waste your time
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10/19/2008 9:38:37 PM |
i need advice or opinions please?!? (its kinda long too) |
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_ranger
Corpus Christi, TX
age: 58
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If a man tells you his girlfriend or wife cheated on him you have three choices.
1. Have him take a blood exam for STD's
2. Run away as fast as you can if it shows up POSITIVE.
3. Chose another young man.
Just enjoy life with your friends and hopefully the right young man will join you.
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10/19/2008 9:50:42 PM |
i need advice or opinions please?!? (its kinda long too) |
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craftygirl002
Tacoma, WA
age: 40
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It sounds to me like he's not sure what he wants. It also sounds like what happened with his ex has left him feeling more than a little insecure. That doesn't make him a bad person, it just means he's had a normal reaction to a hurtful situation. Unfortunately, until he works through those issues, he won't be able to be a very good partner to anyone.
What you're describing is pretty classic behavior. A part of him wants you to be waiting around for him, so he asks questions to determine if you're being 'faithful'. Then, he's not sure if he should trust what you're telling him and feels jealous & insecure. He gets scared and pulls away by talking about being with other women when he gets back. It's also a way to make you jealous so he doesn't have to feel that way. Usually the person doing this doesn't even realize what they're doing. It's all subconscious and they just don't see the pattern.
The trap some people fall into is in thinking that they can 'fix' the other person's insecurities & hurt feelings. You can't. He has to work through that on his own. Your only responsibility is to take care of yourself. You deserve to have a partner who is ready, willing and able to trust you. This man is not ready to do that yet. You also deserve to be happy, not wait for a man to get his act together.
My advice, based on the above, is simple: You can be his friend, but don't pursue anything further. If you're both available, he's resolved his issues, and you're both still interested in the future...that would be the time to try a relationship. Until then, you'd just be setting yourself up for drama you don't need.
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10/19/2008 10:06:19 PM |
i need advice or opinions please?!? (its kinda long too) |
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irishmark909
Highland, CA
age: 42 online now!
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Dont wait until someone else comes along . get out now and be fresh and open minded went the next Hunk shows his interest!
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