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11/30/2008 8:16:18 PM When to say I love you  

klassyklown
Over 2,000 Posts (2,954)
Bakersfield, CA
age: 40 online now!


I was talking to a friend tonight about when and how to tell your SO that you love them. After thinking about it awhile, I don't think you should plan it or make an effort. I think when the time and emotions are right it will just kind of flow.

Do you plan when and how to tell your SO you love them, or does it just kind of happen?

11/30/2008 9:22:21 PM When to say I love you  

rusty_shorts
West Palm Beach, FL
age: 35 online now!


Last time, I waited about 3 months.....

I did'nt plan it that way.. We were more friends than anything...But one night that lil' "love ya, goodnight" just popped right out of my mouth at a time I thought she needed to hear that someone really cared...... And that was the last time she ever spoke to me....

So.... Due to previous circumstances, it may be a while before I say that again...

11/30/2008 9:27:20 PM When to say I love you  

barbaraajo
Over 2,000 Posts (2,112)
Reston, VA
age: 52


I think at this point in time I would plan it, because I do not want to be the first one to say"I love you",so if I thought I did, I would have to wait on them first!

11/30/2008 9:27:20 PM When to say I love you  

ironmuscle
Santa Cruz, CA
age: 32


Quote from klassyklown:
I was talking to a friend tonight about when and how to tell your SO that you love them. After thinking about it awhile, I don't think you should plan it or make an effort. I think when the time and emotions are right it will just kind of flow.

Do you plan when and how to tell your SO you love them, or does it just kind of happen?



Only when the two have made a commitment to date exclusively....By this time you should be able to say it without any strange feelings or reaction.....if it does feel strange then the two should not commit to date exclusively.

11/30/2008 9:30:59 PM When to say I love you  

samstillalways
Over 1,000 Posts (1,667)
Sonoma, CA
age: 35


yeah I don't think I am going to say it first

11/30/2008 9:39:17 PM When to say I love you  

guidojones
Hooper, NE
age: 46 online now!


Quote from klassyklown:
I was talking to a friend tonight about when and how to tell your SO that you love them. After thinking about it awhile, I don't think you should plan it or make an effort. I think when the time and emotions are right it will just kind of flow.

Do you plan when and how to tell your SO you love them, or does it just kind of happen?


i don't plan it, like you said when the times and emotions are right, let it flow. actually for me the time comes when it has to come out, luckily MOST of the time, (there has only been a couple) it has been the right time. what i would like to know is how this word can do so much. 2 people can get along great, one can be in love and the other on the edge of it, but if the one in love says it too fast...it all must end? i know, i've been on both sides but i still don't really get it..

11/30/2008 9:45:55 PM When to say I love you  

klassyklown
Over 2,000 Posts (2,954)
Bakersfield, CA
age: 40 online now!


Quote from rusty_shorts:
Last time, I waited about 3 months..... I did'nt plan it that way.. We were more friends than anything...But one night that lil' "love ya, goodnight" just popped right out of my mouth at a time I thought she needed to hear that someone really cared...... And that was the last time she ever spoke to me.... So.... Due to previous circumstances, it may be a while before I say that again...


Oh Rusty, that really sucks. I cant remember at what point or who said it first in my last LTR.

11/30/2008 9:48:49 PM When to say I love you  

klassyklown
Over 2,000 Posts (2,954)
Bakersfield, CA
age: 40 online now!


guido, I think it has to do with fear. Fear of opening yourself up, fear of allowing someone in, fear of not being worthy of the other person's love.

11/30/2008 9:49:25 PM When to say I love you  

leprechaunjim_
Fort Collins, CO
age: 58


Heck, I tell my close friends that I love them. When I love someone, I will tell him or her. If she and I are dating, I feel she has a right to know. I know it's a risk, but if you don't say it, and your other doesn't say it, you could wind up wandering away from each other, just because you didn't know and felt unloved and unappreciated.

Jim

11/30/2008 9:52:21 PM When to say I love you  

bamagirl77
Huntsville, AL
age: 31


It would take congress and few other things for me to say it first. I would rather wait for the man to tell me.

11/30/2008 9:52:25 PM When to say I love you  

leprechaunjim_
Fort Collins, CO
age: 58


I also feel that you are better off if you know that other person doesn't love you, rather than dragging things out. Of course if you love him or her, you have to let them go, if they don't feel the same.

Jim

11/30/2008 10:08:15 PM When to say I love you  

guidojones
Hooper, NE
age: 46 online now!


Quote from klassyklown:
guido, I think it has to do with fear. Fear of opening yourself up, fear of allowing someone in, fear of not being worthy of the other person's love.
maybe you're right, i guess we arn't going to solve this age old question here, but it seems if you think about it, if 2 people are close enough to be having a relationship, and feelings for each other, that the one not in love, but in like, would take this as a compliment, not as a threat, but like i said, i have reacted the same way, just don't quite know why, i guess for me once it's said if it doesn't get stopped it intensifies, and if you're not ready for it to intensify there seems to be only one way to stop that..

11/30/2008 10:12:00 PM When to say I love you  

noredneckhere
Over 1,000 Posts (1,942)
Sevierville, TN
age: 48


When lots of drinks, witty conversation, and the promise to pull out have failed.

11/30/2008 10:16:24 PM When to say I love you  

klassyklown
Over 2,000 Posts (2,954)
Bakersfield, CA
age: 40 online now!


Heck, I tell my close friends that I love them. When I love someone, I will tell him or her. If she and I are dating, I feel she has a right to know. I know it's a risk, but if you don't say it, and your other doesn't say it, you could wind up wandering away from each other, just because you didn't know and felt unloved and unappreciated.

Jim


Jim, it is so easy to tell my friends I love them. There is no risk involved. You wouldn't believe how many times my friends and I will be sitting around and turn to each other at the same time and say I love you. Or I will be thinking how much I love my friends and they will tell me they love me.

But, in thinking about it, I really don't know what it would take for me to be willing to take that leap again. But, then again I am a blurter, so it would probably just pop right out of my mouth.


OMG noredneck, that is very, very ugly. Please consider yourself admonished.




[Edited 11/30/2008 10:18:14 PM]

11/30/2008 10:38:43 PM When to say I love you  

noredneckhere
Over 1,000 Posts (1,942)
Sevierville, TN
age: 48


Quote from klassyklown:
Heck, I tell my close friends that I love them. When I love someone, I will tell him or her. If she and I are dating, I feel she has a right to know. I know it's a risk, but if you don't say it, and your other doesn't say it, you could wind up wandering away from each other, just because you didn't know and felt unloved and unappreciated.

Jim


Jim, it is so easy to tell my friends I love them. There is no risk involved. You wouldn't believe how many times my friends and I will be sitting around and turn to each other at the same time and say I love you. Or I will be thinking how much I love my friends and they will tell me they love me.

But, in thinking about it, I really don't know what it would take for me to be willing to take that leap again. But, then again I am a blurter, so it would probably just pop right out of my mouth.


OMG noredneck, that is very, very ugly. Please consider yourself admonished.


I'd be willing to bet a pretty fair amount, that 'I love you' has been used more times to get laid, than said 100% truthfully. Wanna bet?

As for the admonishment, when do I get my spankin' ???



[Edited 11/30/2008 10:39:26 PM]


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