10/18/2007 7:45:32 AM |
Do you loose yourself? |
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lil_lady
Peachtree City, GA
age: 39
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Do you find you have problems loosing bits of yourself in relationships, taking on pieces of the other person? Like Hopes, dreams and habits. Then you break up only to see you're alone and stuck with someone elses dreams; while not being as much of yourself as you once were?
[Edited 10/18/2007 8:33:46 AM]
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10/18/2007 8:19:45 AM |
Do you loose yourself? |
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eroticartist
West Harrison, NY
age: 48 online now!
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lost my whole identity
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10/18/2007 8:58:38 AM |
Do you loose yourself? |
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memerick
Edmond, OK
age: 27
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its sad that we as humans say we wont change for anyone but when you have someone you find yourself forming yourself to them and vice versa
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10/18/2007 9:01:21 AM |
Do you loose yourself? |
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gawd
Appleton, WI
age: 53
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Cant say as I have..I try to stay focused as to who I am and what I want in life.
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10/18/2007 9:04:52 AM |
Do you loose yourself? |
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klassykitten
Toccoa, GA
age: 50 online now!
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Yep...in past relationships I did and it was like an Easter egg hunt trying to find enough pieces to put me back together when they ended.
I know you're not supposed to say NEVER....BUT HEAR ME LOUD AND CLEAR....NEEEVVVER...NEEEVER...EEEVVVRRR....AGAIN!!!!!!
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10/18/2007 9:06:44 AM |
Do you loose yourself? |
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eroticartist
West Harrison, NY
age: 48 online now!
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YOU GOT THAT SOOOOO RIGHT
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10/18/2007 9:11:17 AM |
Do you loose yourself? |
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ilovepink
Mariposa, CA
age: 51
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I would have to say that I have taken on some of their passions, and put mine aside, like, painting, horseback riding, stuff like that. However as soon as the relationship was over I didn't find I had lost any of myself, I just started doing the things that I am passionate about.
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10/18/2007 9:13:19 AM |
Do you loose yourself? |
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klassykitten
Toccoa, GA
age: 50 online now!
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Wood turn up that hearing aid....I SAID NEVEREVERNEVEREVERNEVEREVER!!!!!!!
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10/18/2007 9:16:39 AM |
Do you loose yourself? |
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mugan
Gresham, OR
age: 25
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I'v lost a piece of myself but never gained anything from them except the ability to build walls.
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10/18/2007 9:26:14 AM |
Do you loose yourself? |
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kirota2
Webster City, IA
age: 34
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I think that we get lost in the relationship. We forget or choose to ignore some parts of ourselves just to keep the relationship going or in our eyes make it stronger. In the process our own thoughts become distorted in some ways. In my case I lost my whole identity in my marriage. I was a mother and a wife and not the Melissa that people new me as. I don't know if we really loose ourselves as much as we push that person to the back. When the split comes that side of you comes back to the front. Maybe not all of it, but that gives us the chance in some situations to become a better person than we were before the relationship and split. JMO
Kirota
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10/18/2007 9:26:21 AM |
Do you loose yourself? |
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lil_lady
Peachtree City, GA
age: 39
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Oh Mugan, I'm so sorry. Learning and gaining more insight is the only thing that keeps me from being bitter.
[Edited 10/18/2007 9:26:42 AM]
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10/18/2007 9:28:32 AM |
Do you loose yourself? |
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nopretense
Harleysville, PA
age: 47 online now!
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I don't know, but I think building shared dreams and finding common interests is a healthy thing. Even, participating in/learning about the interests of one's partner.
Yes, that does mean that when a relationship ends, you have to unwind some of that. That is why you take time off between relationships...to decide which dreams, which activities, you want to keep as your own, and which to walk away from.
That can be painful but that doesn't mean that it is wrong to become so invested and intertwined with your partner. That is part of how the two become more than the sum of the parts.
Having said that...obviously there are unhealthy and inappropriate ways to lose yourself, give up pieces of you that are vital to your well-being, and THAT is a huge error. To that, we must say NEVERNEVERNEVERNEVERNEVERNEVER. But to the appropriate sharing, compromising, learning, opening up, shared-dream-building, I say YES!
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10/18/2007 9:31:09 AM |
Do you loose yourself? |
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newlife4me2
Saylorsburg, PA
age: 42
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I couldn't have said that better if I tried............
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10/18/2007 9:37:51 AM |
Do you loose yourself? |
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klassykitten
Toccoa, GA
age: 50 online now!
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I second that motion nopretense.....or is it third???
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10/18/2007 10:23:45 AM |
Do you loose yourself? |
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montanaalone
Butte, MT
age: 62
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Nopretense: you beat me to the punch you said what i was thinking. it says it all.
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