Is it just me who can't break loose?

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10/20/2007 2:49:33 PM	Is it just me who can't break loose?
julymorning07 Saint James, MO age: 55	I waited a long time for a new relationship after my divorce (23 yrs). The new one was just recently 3 years old and had it's share of ups and downs, bottom line it is going nowhere and I am miserable half the time. I have tried off and on for nearly 2 years to seek out someone new but I just cannot seem to break that 'addiction' to the other person. I have tried therapy, hypnosis, anti-depressants, nothing works. If I didn't have pets that have no one else to care for I would go right now to the stress center and beg for tranquilizers. I have never in my life been like this over a man, and I hate being like this. It is not that I could not find someone else, I have proven that to myself that is not it. This other person is like a drug that I cannot, even though I really want to not feel this way, stop craving. This cannot be resolved because he has begun lying and cheating and I MUST find a way to stop hurting and be able to give myself a chance to be happy with someone else. I read the rebound thread, that worries me a little too. I don't want to hurt anyone EVER, the way I have been. Has anyone else gone through this and have any hopeful insight?
10/20/2007 3:02:48 PM	Is it just me who can't break loose?
trublu5ft2 Columbia, TN age: 51	Addictions are hard to break or they would not be addictions. The guy is your drug of choice. I think you are going to have to hit rock bottom ( apparently you are not quite there yet) before you will break free. It won't be easy. Addictions never are. Good luck Trish [Edited 10/20/2007 3:03:04 PM]
10/20/2007 3:09:45 PM	Is it just me who can't break loose?
dg1260 Galion, OH age: 47	July, One thought comes to mind. In most addictions there is a detox period. This is usually painful and hell to go through. It's why the medical community has created a load of pharmaceuticals to ease the passing. As Tru pointed out, you apparently haven't hit that point where your willing to endure the pain of recovery. God bless you and I hope for the best for you.
10/20/2007 3:36:30 PM	Is it just me who can't break loose?
julymorning07 Saint James, MO age: 55	Thanks for your responses. I hate to think I am going to hit any more rock bottom than I do right now. I am aware that detox requires a support group and I am trying to build one. Just about the time I am totally seeing eye to eye with my friends I get some kind of reasonable excuse from this guy and then I am back to defending and fighting for my "drug" and we are all back to square one. Yes, withdrawl is a nightmare. I really wonder how things like this can happen. Is my body addicted to the adrenalin rush roller coaster of fear and relief?
10/20/2007 6:04:08 PM	Is it just me who can't break loose?
julymorning07 Saint James, MO age: 55	I want to add at this point that typical of the attraction addiction, I tried to alleviate the withdrawl pain by trying to establish contact. No dice, he is off and doing something and has his cell off. I should not be doing it anyway, but am trying so hard to stop this horrible pain and hurt. I could use some caring conversation right now, I just am not in a position to go to the Stress Center. I hate being so weak, but I think maybe it is time to help me through this.
10/20/2007 6:18:37 PM	Is it just me who can't break loose?
julymorning07 Saint James, MO age: 55	Um, well, okay. Nobody here really knows me well enough.
10/20/2007 6:29:31 PM	Is it just me who can't break loose?
sweetiepie123 Cary, NC age: 31	Hi July- If you come back and check your thread here's my advice: Therapy and read, read, read. And talk to folks like the ones on this site. It really is a great sounding board. 2 books I just read recently that I'll pass on to you as well...not sure how relevant to your situation but I know they couldn't hurt... The Dance of Anger by Harriet Lerner The Rules by Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schneider
10/20/2007 6:56:57 PM	Is it just me who can't break loose?
julymorning07 Saint James, MO age: 55	I have the book about attraction addictions, but the key element is the support group. I have a daughter 2 hours away. My neighbor friends have gone to bed, and the only other friends that I have right now are the ones I have made online and are scattered miles and miles apart. (I am disfellowshipped from my religious organization which was in essence my family for 20 years). I wish that you all had had a chance to get to know me, before this happened to me again. There is not much you can say to someone you do not know. By the way, I am bouncing back and forth between here and my other board I am a member on. Tho only two there no of my situation today. [Edited 10/20/2007 6:59:11 PM]
10/20/2007 8:51:54 PM	Is it just me who can't break loose?
julymorning07 Saint James, MO age: 55	Nopretense spent a good deal of time talking to me on instant message, and I feel much more in control. He is a super guy and I appreciate what he has done for me a whole lot. Thank you Fritz.