1/1/2009 12:05:21 PM |
advice needed pronto! |
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theresasmiles
Romeoville, IL
age: 22
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Okay so I started seeing this guy around halloween time. he has a seven year old boy, and a drug addicted ex girlfriend....I really care about him, and him and I have soo m uch fun together. but hes torn...hes told me that he still loves her. i told him that he always would...so heres the dilemma...what do i do? do i continue to pursue something with someone who has all this baggage? because i really do care for him...or do i walk away and forget about it? im not sure what to do. i have never been in this situation...i want to be there for him...and i told him that i will always be there for him...uhhhhh. im so confused!! HELP!
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1/1/2009 12:09:26 PM |
advice needed pronto! |
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lnlass
Laguna Niguel, CA
age: 51
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I would say look at his actions more than his words. He probably will always love the woman....we have all fell in love with folks that were wrong for us. Drug addicts are not right for us but there are still human beings and have feelings especially if they become clean. You can't entirely turn those feelings off like a faucet and if they share a daughter together they will always be bonded. So, this is the baggage he has. But does he get buried by it more often than not, or just has to deal with as he has visitations with the daughter? If you are not feeling really passionate about this man, i.e. he is the one you think you could see spending the rest of your life with, I'd say walk away now. You can do better. But if there is really something about him that makes you both feel connected, you will have to deal to a degree and just manage the uncomfortable moments you may have with it.
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1/1/2009 12:09:33 PM |
advice needed pronto! |
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55mm
Comstock Park, MI
age: 39
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the more involved with him you get, the more his baggage becomes yours. It might be different if he and the mother of his kid were on better terms with her drug problem and his feelings for her. People who are still having feelings for their ex's (which makes no sense that he would for her given her drug issue) will always make you feel second to her. You may want to find someone more stable and get away from the druggie ex. I think that's just asking for trouble.
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1/1/2009 12:12:45 PM |
advice needed pronto! |
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fishenguy
Santa Rosa, CA
age: 50
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You walk away. He has told you he still loves her. I sense that he wants to save her from herself and you want to save him from her. You don't need that in your life.
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1/1/2009 12:16:23 PM |
advice needed pronto! |
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theresasmiles
Romeoville, IL
age: 22
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thanks everyone. im just lost....and i dont like that feeling
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1/1/2009 12:16:58 PM |
advice needed pronto! |
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bella2020
Lebanon, OH
age: 47
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I agree with fishen guy
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1/1/2009 12:17:03 PM |
advice needed pronto! |
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lnlass
Laguna Niguel, CA
age: 51
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Just notice OP's age. 21. Run fast! You have your whole life ahead of you.
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1/1/2009 12:24:31 PM |
advice needed pronto! |
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smitty4980
Fort White, FL
age: 57
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You didn't say how old Romeo is but if has has a 7 year old and still has feelings for the kid's mother then you are just being used. Come on, get real. You don't need that kind of nonsense. Someone is getting set up to get hurt and it isn't him. Don't let your need for someone let you settle for anyone. You can do better. What's your rush?
Smitty
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1/1/2009 12:25:07 PM |
advice needed pronto! |
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coolhandluke462
Salem, OR
age: 48
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its a new year, do what feels right for you, with anything you do you will learn from it.
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1/1/2009 12:26:15 PM |
advice needed pronto! |
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theresasmiles
Romeoville, IL
age: 22
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im in no rush!!!! i dont know where ill be after i graduate from college in may..and he just turned 28...i dont need a man to make me feel good about myself. i know im a great catch!
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1/1/2009 12:29:38 PM |
advice needed pronto! |
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lnlass
Laguna Niguel, CA
age: 51
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There ya go. Ditch em and go out and have fun with your girlfriends. Go to a country bar and line dance. Go to a pool hall and shoot some pool. Go have drinks at a bowling alley. Go do some outside sport . You can have great times with the girls and you might just meet some fine young men to date. At your age, life should be a buffet, not a single serving course.
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1/1/2009 12:30:58 PM |
advice needed pronto! |
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theresasmiles
Romeoville, IL
age: 22
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me and the girls are going shoppping!
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1/1/2009 12:31:57 PM |
advice needed pronto! |
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lnlass
Laguna Niguel, CA
age: 51
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Retain therapy! Enjoy. If in Illinois, hit up the nearest Macy's, Nordstroms, and Dillards. Have fun!
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1/1/2009 12:33:01 PM |
advice needed pronto! |
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hugsnlaughter
McKeesport, PA
age: 49 online now!
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Walk away, you are only 21. He has told you he always will love her and are you ready to be a stand in mom to a seven year old. I say move on.
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1/1/2009 12:34:57 PM |
advice needed pronto! |
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lee640
Grayson, KY
age: 29
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He has told you he still love's her..What more do you need to know???Let him go It's not worth it...There is more than one man out there...Don't sacrifice your happiness for him
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