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9/22/2009 3:24:57 PM im single mom of 3 why can't men see past that to me  
califem26
Lake Elsinore, CA
age: 28


im looking for a man that doesn't freak as soon as he hears the word kids just because i have them doesn't mean your going to meet them your supposed to be for me lol




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9/22/2009 4:33:02 PM im single mom of 3 why can't men see past that to me  
lonleyheart30
Monmouth, IL
age: 30


I ask myself that same ?. I get that all the time, even the ones that has kids either fulltime or parttime.

9/22/2009 6:03:58 PM im single mom of 3 why can't men see past that to me  
castalbrt
Carson, CA
age: 35


Because you need to find people that have the same. Most single guys with no kids are use to having all the attention. Men love for you to focus on us and when you have kids they are not the number 1 person in your life. A person that has kids will understand that if a kid says mommy it hurts your going to drop every ting and make it feel better and not be jealous about it. As a single father I've gone througjh the same. You see on all womens post don't want your baby momma drama. Well guess what we don't like it either. Keep searching yes the single guys are having more fun they have no ties. Our fun is family orientated with a few adult nights out. Keep your eyes open it will happen.

9/22/2009 8:49:14 PM im single mom of 3 why can't men see past that to me  
1namillion4u
Upland, CA
age: 44


Men want their freedom it seems and do not want to be involved with woman that have children. I have only one age 14 and that seems to be an issue with many men today. As they just want to be able to up and leave at the drop of a hat to do whatever they want without being tied down. Its pretty sad to see a man cannot be understanding of a womans circumstance since children all do grow up given time. We have all been there at one time or another in our life. But I guess men like this are not meant for woman like us. We want men that are family oriented and understanding of us having children. Right?



[Edited 9/22/2009 9:03:32 PM PST]

9/22/2009 9:13:19 PM im single mom of 3 why can't men see past that to me  

wreckerman57
Over 1,000 Posts (1,031)
Port Jervis, NY
age: 52


Believe me it goes both ways.I am single and have 4 kids with me.

9/23/2009 12:12:43 PM im single mom of 3 why can't men see past that to me  

barrydean
Over 2,000 Posts (2,195)
Springville, UT
age: 42


some men actually do like kids and have there own that live with them like i do.if they run because of kids you dont want him anyway

9/23/2009 4:49:53 PM im single mom of 3 why can't men see past that to me  
lisa1515
Over 2,000 Posts (2,705)
York, ON
age: 29


it's not rocket science darling's......they don't want to take care of not 1, not 2, BUT 3 KIDS that aren't his.

9/23/2009 5:32:58 PM im single mom of 3 why can't men see past that to me  

crazayangie
Bakersfield, CA
age: 30


trust me i have the same problem i have 3 kids and i am single been single for a long time so i guess its probably better just to stay alone than to try to b with someone thats not gonna apreciate the loving side of having some kids around.

9/23/2009 9:10:15 PM im single mom of 3 why can't men see past that to me  
nyrican_718
South Gate, CA
age: 30


Me as a father of a five year old girl it seems I click better with those that have a kid or kids. We have more in common but single people without kids sometimes feel you may have baby daddy drama. When I was dating before I had my daughter meeting women was much easier but now right off the bat they tend to think there is some type of baby mama drama around the corner.

9/23/2009 9:41:59 PM im single mom of 3 why can't men see past that to me  
james0131
Colorado Springs, CO
age: 33


People without children can never feel the joy and hardship of taking care someone so little and precious. They will lose many great times with you and your children.

9/24/2009 6:42:43 PM im single mom of 3 why can't men see past that to me  

puertoricanredd
Stone Mountain, GA
age: 21


dont worry about you findin someone,im a mother of three and yes im still single but i feel me being a mother of three then i feel like i would have to attract a strong minded man that is secure within himself so if a man runs wen you mention three kids then he wasnt the man for you in the first place i kno thats easier said then done and i kno that it might take longer for people like us to find "that one" but he's or she is out there.

9/24/2009 10:02:45 PM im single mom of 3 why can't men see past that to me  

browneyes4949
Clearwater, FL
age: 60


YOU...ENJOY the years you have with your children!...I did...3 girls..( I didn't want ANY men around my girls...not even from Church!...Child molesters GO there to LOOK for single moms with kids TOO OFTEN!) Now...the LAST one got to b 18...and I SURVIVED them....NOW I can date again...if I can FIND the time...or someone interesting. Surely NOT these Guy Truckdrivers out here! What a bunch! Don't ever push your kids aside...to be with some guy...guys come and go...your children will ALWAYS be the MOST IMPORTANT!
Have a Blessed Day! Kath

9/25/2009 7:28:33 AM im single mom of 3 why can't men see past that to me  

bigheartedmannc
Over 1,000 Posts (1,902)
Danbury, NC
age: 31


Quote from browneyes4949:
YOU...ENJOY the years you have with your children!...I did...3 girls..( I didn't want ANY men around my girls...not even from Church!...Child molesters GO there to LOOK for single moms with kids TOO OFTEN!) Now...the LAST one got to b 18...and I SURVIVED them....NOW I can date again...if I can FIND the time...or someone interesting. Surely NOT these Guy Truckdrivers out here! What a bunch! Don't ever push your kids aside...to be with some guy...guys come and go...your children will ALWAYS be the MOST IMPORTANT!
Have a Blessed Day! Kath



"Surely not these guy truckdrivers out here!" Hey now !!!! I resent that remark! There are alot of good men out here driving trucks. I try to be the best i can be although i'm sure i fall short from time to time. I don't know exactly what your predjudice to truckdrivers comes from but don't let one or two bad apples write off an entire group of people. That is the next thing to racism! We as a whole are hardworking individuals leading an even harder life. You try leaving your kids and family knowing you will be gone 2 or 3 weeks(sometimes more), living out of a 8 by 8 box(knowing you have a nice house at home and in several states we are not even allowed our heat and airconditioning because we have to turn our trucks off when we stop), Eating fast food(while theres plenty of homecooked food at home), driving 600-700 miles a day trying to survive(while family at home is having birthdays, ball games, holiday meals and growing up), missing out on parties and events that you want to attend but cant because youre 1000 miles from home. It takes a strong MAN to have a family and be a truckdriver.

Back on topic browneyes is right on one thing you should never push your kids to the side, eventually you will find the right man for you AND your children.

IN answer to the topic question, some men would find 3 children to be a ready made family and feel as though they would never be able to have "their own kids". Even though the kids may call him daddy theres still a bond between flesh and blood that is hard to replace. I had 2 boys in a previous relationship and loved them as my sons but there is always that question in the back of your mind "would i treat my own this way" or "i wonder what my child woulda been like".

I'm not sayin i wouldn't date you just because of your 3 children i just wanted to offer insight into a mans mind as i do have a couple of friends who have that mindset.

Also califem26 i apologize for my rant at the beginning of this post, i just get tired of being bashed because of either a stereotype or 1 bad experience!

10/10/2009 7:48:22 PM im single mom of 3 why can't men see past that to me  
latara
Over 4,000 Posts! (6,357)
Gardiner, ME
age: 34


It's the same for me dear and I have kid's men just can't seem To see past the kid part I do agree There.

10/11/2009 2:56:35 PM im single mom of 3 why can't men see past that to me  

jhartleytx
Aubrey, TX
age: 37


You are definately in the wrong dating pool! As a matter of fact a couple of the women that I'm talking to have 3 children. Doesn't mean anything to me that they have 3 kids. Just more of them to get to know since kids are generally an extension of their parents.

10/16/2009 4:42:50 PM im single mom of 3 why can't men see past that to me  
melzzers
Indiana, PA
age: 31


I'm a single mom of three... and it is hard to find someone who sees past it.

I'm not looking for a daddy for them.
I just want someone I can spend time with an have adult conversations an movies an stuff.

But then on the other hand I get real cautious round guys who say "Oh I love kids" Then I think "Great, I found a pervert..no thanks!"

That isnt fair of me to think or feel but these days it's a thought you have to think bout.

10/17/2009 8:40:05 AM im single mom of 3 why can't men see past that to me  

hearttrob37
Ware Shoals, SC
age: 38


if thats the case then u dont need those kind of men.

10/17/2009 9:40:49 PM im single mom of 3 why can't men see past that to me  
alwaysm3
New Orleans, LA
age: 28


i agree, feel your pain.. but its life ya know. im separated with 3 kids, dont even want the dad back lol. being alone, missing that interact with someone of the other sex can be miserable and then again a joy because you can go as you please and dance to your own music.. wow that sounds good to me. but single parents have the best of both worlds. we get told 'love you', 'thank you', 'i miss you' and its the truth because our kids dont know how to lie about that yet (mine dont, 2, 5, and 7).. but then again having to clean up the broken glass, mop up juice or whatever, it would have you losing your mind, but its hard when females/men have kids and try to date.. we have to be protectors of our children. i think the dating scene is good and bad because we are really screening possible mates. but when the right man/woman comes along your kids and the other person will click with no problem ........ best wishes for all single parents

10/18/2009 1:33:00 PM im single mom of 3 why can't men see past that to me  

barrydean
Over 2,000 Posts (2,195)
Springville, UT
age: 42


some men can.i just ran into a woman i used to work with she has three kids ages 9,7,and 2. she was just a friend and i had them over for dinner.after dinner a few drinks and a few hours of conversation it just may lead to more than friends.

10/19/2009 11:30:45 AM im single mom of 3 why can't men see past that to me  
bigben83
Raceland, LA
age: 31


Ilike kids,i have 4kids! I don,t mine a woman who have kids like urself! U look & sound like ur a nice woman, alwaysM3!



[Edited 10/19/2009 11:32:15 AM PST]

10/19/2009 6:12:29 PM im single mom of 3 why can't men see past that to me  
ladybugkisses
Jacksonville, FL
age: 30


men only see wat they want to see it all bout them they think whoooa 3kids no room for her to do wat i need her to (yea we kinda run out of time for ourself) but thats part of being a parent i think if a man cant except fact a woman has kids then he shouldnt even try to act like somthing is there when its not and move on but be honest bout why they are moving on 2 all those mothers out there keep up the great work somday your dreams will come true just takes faith i know u hav it cause every single mother is strong

10/19/2009 7:14:35 PM im single mom of 3 why can't men see past that to me  

dyezah
Over 2,000 Posts (2,597)
North Little Rock, AR
age: 38


If they can't live with my having three kids, they aren't the one for me. My kids will come first until they are ready to stand on thier own two feet. It doesn't stress me @ all.

10/21/2009 9:41:16 PM im single mom of 3 why can't men see past that to me  
roseswither99
Aragon, GA
age: 30


Wow where to start..lol.....My x fionce and the 2 of my kids father, is still hung up on me, but never ask about them and does nothing for them, the only time he pays attention to the little ones is when he is with me, I have found the dating scene seems to be hopeless if you learned from your mistakes and are looking for Good Christian Adults anyway. It's even worse if you intimidate men by your good looks, smashing personality and independency......they hate that.....lol I just give it to God, He knows what is needed in my life!

10/22/2009 12:36:46 PM im single mom of 3 why can't men see past that to me  
goldyswm
Torrance, CA
age: 37


See past you? We can't even see you luv. Pic?

10/24/2009 4:25:44 AM im single mom of 3 why can't men see past that to me  
latara
Over 4,000 Posts! (6,357)
Gardiner, ME
age: 34


Well dear don't feel bad I have 2 kid's and In the same boat

10/28/2009 2:26:22 PM im single mom of 3 why can't men see past that to me  
curt200469
Cold Spring, MN
age: 41 online now!


Kids don't bother me if u got them dats fine wit me its still wats on da inside dat counts rite

10/28/2009 8:40:39 PM im single mom of 3 why can't men see past that to me  
midntdrm
Longmont, CO
age: 33


Quote from califem26:
im looking for a man that doesn't freak as soon as he hears the word kids just because i have them doesn't mean your going to meet them your supposed to be for me lol


When I was your age I dated women with children. I did not have problem with them having children. Maybe they do not know how to deal with children.

Over the years I have dated plenty of women who had children and never had a problem. I think its all in the frame of mind a guy is in. Maybe they just want to have a roll in the hay and see the kids as a complication. Or they just want all your undivided attention and do not want to share you with your kids. Either way if they run away you they are doing you a favor. Better to have them leave in the beginning than to invest time and emotions and then have them leave.


It takes a special man to be with you and your kids. If they cant see your kids the way you see them they are the wrong person.

10/29/2009 8:05:07 AM im single mom of 3 why can't men see past that to me  
curt200469
Cold Spring, MN
age: 41 online now!


R u ladies readin I do t mind kids let's get 2getha & defiantly bring ur kids mine r grown & gone & I really miss dem so I welcome u & ur kids wit open arms

11/1/2009 5:43:25 PM im single mom of 3 why can't men see past that to me  

kennelson
Gretna, LA
age: 39


because they are idiots....i lived in elsinore after katrina at lake elsinore west marina,across from the high school on riverside...small world.....

11/2/2009 7:38:43 PM im single mom of 3 why can't men see past that to me  

whitedragon9
Tulsa, OK
age: 29


hi there there are some men out there that will

11/9/2009 2:19:54 AM im single mom of 3 why can't men see past that to me  
latara
Over 4,000 Posts! (6,357)
Gardiner, ME
age: 34


well Dear I am at The given up point since there aren't to many that can look past the kid's and see what I or any Other single mom has to offer.

11/30/2009 12:28:52 PM im single mom of 3 why can't men see past that to me  
murrieta76
Fowler, CA
age: 34


dont feel bad, i have 4 kids, but they live with there mon some of the time, and when women find out that i have 4 kids they up and leave! to be honest most men want a women with no luggage, (no offense) but then again there are men who want a family and are afraid to get into one. i have had a girlfriend with 3 kids, and the youngest was 2 months whebn i met her. i raised her daughter for 3 years and when we broke up it was awkard but i still halk to her and see my step daughter after. but all in all she knows who her real dad is....me!!
if your serious for a man to look past all that and just see you.... well here is one that will look past and just see you!!

12/5/2009 4:22:28 PM im single mom of 3 why can't men see past that to me  

fisherman152152
New Lenox, IL
age: 54


It will happen. Don't let a nimrod make you think otherwise. Always believe in yourself and stick with the plan.