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11/3/2009 12:09:18 PM	Settle this Debate:
libra1976 Fort Wayne, IN age: 33	By now just about everyone has heard of or seen the movie "HE JUST NOT INTO YOU". In the movie they say that if a guy is "into" you he will call you or make his intentions know. My friends and I are debating this issue. My friends say we shouldn't call or text a guy unless he calls or text first. If he is interested he will make it known. I say that it's a two way street. If I'm interested then I will call or text. He if isn't interested he has the option of saying so or not responing. Why sit at home and stare at my phone? Guys would you like for a woman to call of text you first? Is it to forward?
11/3/2009 10:19:14 PM	Settle this Debate:
alliscalm Corpus Christi, TX age: 59	I think tradition started most items you speak about.I think when a women will not call she e ither has to many others she is talking to or she is waiting on somethng to happen that just may need her action first.If your job was to have the goal of obtaining a man and actually get paid to find one would you just sit there and think he will call? I think we have so much politics in this no one wins ! Perhaps both male and female should make a more concise effort!
11/3/2009 10:23:48 PM	Settle this Debate:
latestflame Memphis, TN age: 32 online now!	I'm shy so sometimes the woman has to be the one to show interest or I may not evenj notice. I think no matter what gender someone is if they are really sure someone has a good chance of being a good match they've got to be the one to take a risk.
11/3/2009 10:25:59 PM	Settle this Debate:
jessmingler Queensland Australia age: 45	I suspect there are vast cultural differences... so take what I have to say with a grain of salt (everyone else does...hahaha!) Everyone is different...everyone has different ideas of what the dance of dating is all about...there are no set rules. Do what is appropriate for you, if it means calling someone you are interested in knowing more of...then do it. I ask you this.... are you planning on dating your friends who are giving you all of this advice? Or asking for their permission to sleep with a man, go away with a man on a vacation, weekend break...become committed to a a man... marry that man... have his children? I think perhaps not. Just be you. [Edited 11/3/2009 10:27:06 PM PST]
11/3/2009 10:27:27 PM	Settle this Debate:
dghorn Assiniboia, SK age: 46	I did not see the movie but if she has my # she already knows that I am interested in her, so if I did not call her back soon ,a few days I would hope that she would phone me as I most likely lost her #. We are now in the year 2009 not 1960, women can do everything we can and have just as many rights to assert themselves as we do. I do not think there is any wrong with a lady making some moves forward; it would just show me how much she was really into me.
11/3/2009 10:37:48 PM	Settle this Debate:
stasisbane Irondale, MO age: 39	Do what feels right to you, it's your life. If I gave her my number, then I'm interested. Normally, I'll call pretty quick if I have her number, and if she calls first, all the better.
11/3/2009 10:43:53 PM	Settle this Debate:
redinnevada Wadsworth, NV age: 48	I'm with the guys on this one. If a girl already has a guys number, and she DIDN'T get it secondhand from someone else, and if the reason he gave it to her wasn't because she said she'd water his plants while he's in Barbados with another girl, then yes.... by all means, call or text him when appropriate. Appropriate means NOT at 2am after a few glasses of liquid courage and some egging on from your girlfriend. Worst that could happen is he doesn't answer, call back, or if he does answer or call back, he says "no thanks" hopefully in a polite manner.
11/3/2009 10:47:25 PM	Settle this Debate:
librajason Gateway, AR age: 34	I agree with the 2-way street thing.
11/3/2009 10:53:18 PM	Settle this Debate:
joann1980 Roseburg, OR age: 29	Since this is up for debate. Lets say you have been seeing a guy for a couple weeks. And he is always up for doing things with you, when you call him. But you then start to notice that you are doing all the calling. So by testig out a theory and not calling him, he never calls after 3 or 4 days. Does that mean he has others he is seeing as well as you. Its funny cause after a week I get a text saying I must not be interested anymore and was wondering if he had left some items at my place. How weird is that?
11/4/2009 12:41:14 AM	Settle this Debate:
bbw47reader Frederick, MD age: 47	You are right, they are wrong.
11/4/2009 12:52:40 AM	Settle this Debate:
s1owhand Palau, PW age: 49	if you stare at the phone long enough it bursts into flames. so, stare if you must, but keep the fire extinguisher handy!
11/4/2009 12:54:47 AM	Settle this Debate:
s1owhand Palau, PW age: 49	everybody likes to get mail and phone calls. so mail or call somebody today! it's fun, easy, cheap and makes you and the recipient both feel good! [Edited 11/4/2009 12:55:07 AM PST]
11/4/2009 12:56:13 AM	Settle this Debate:
gypsysays Westbank, BC age: 44	No.....they can call me or kiss my sassy azzzzzzz!!!
11/4/2009 12:59:29 AM	Settle this Debate:
lovethelake17 Henderson, NV age: 51	I truly don't understand why we think men and women are so different from each other. I'm flattered when someone likes me and calls or texts me (I'd prefer a call over a text.) Why wouldn't a man be pleased by that? If he's not, then he'd be polite about it. Just as I would be, if I'm not interested. So you're right, your friends are wrong.
11/4/2009 1:04:27 AM	Settle this Debate:
s1owhand Palau, PW age: 49	Quote from gypsysays: No.....they can call me or kiss my sassy azzzzzzz!!! you know you want to call me first. i can feel it.
11/4/2009 1:06:40 AM	Settle this Debate:
gypsysays Westbank, BC age: 44	Quote from s1owhand: you know you want to call me first. i can feel it. Oh nooooooooooo!!!! You have to call my sassy azzzzzzzz first!!! Those are the rules!!!
11/4/2009 1:10:24 AM	Settle this Debate:
s1owhand Palau, PW age: 49	Quote from gypsysays: Oh nooooooooooo!!!! You have to call my sassy azzzzzzzz first!!! Those are the rules!!! See! She did NOT deny it! I knew she wanted to call first!
11/4/2009 6:13:05 AM	Settle this Debate:
jasmi Latrobe, PA age: 53	I have had men tell me that they think it is nice when a woman makes the first move, to call them. I see nothing wrong with it. I think gender roles have changed to the point where a woman should be comfortable making the phone call to him.
11/4/2009 11:33:51 AM	Settle this Debate:
d_freebird Cocoa, FL age: 49	If the guy you like, is as tangled up in rules and self-doubt as you, you both get to go nowhere. There are plenty of purveyors of "rules" that are aimed at making the "game" swing one way or another. He says she should, she says he should, blah, blah, blah. But there are worse things you could do, than call when you feel like calling. Like, living in a stupid game that you can't get out of. If he takes you for granted because you show some interest, well, you'd find out sooner or later about that anyway. Internet forums are not for settling debates. They are for prolonging them and spawning others.
11/4/2009 11:35:47 AM	Settle this Debate:
gypsysays Westbank, BC age: 44	Call me baby.......call me RIGHT NOW!!! I will be waiting......
11/4/2009 11:38:22 AM	Settle this Debate:
gambler1040 Beaumont, TX age: 46	no its not to forward and you should. i'm very shy and most if not all the woman i have met off this site or chatted with approached me first. Not that i'm any kind of great catch or anything but i just don't do well approaching women on here or in the real world.
11/4/2009 2:26:47 PM	Settle this Debate:
10_2ur_biz Highland, CA age: 43	I say if you like a guy let him know immediately. do not listen to your friends , listen to your heart.
11/4/2009 2:38:39 PM	Settle this Debate:
mrchris2u Hicksville, NY age: 48	I don't like aggressive women. I like the coy type who play hard to get. I'm the man. I want to make the first moves. Thats just me though.
11/4/2009 2:46:47 PM	Settle this Debate:
petron Garland, TX age: 48	So...how'd the call go? wasn't so bad, was it?
11/4/2009 2:50:55 PM	Settle this Debate:
leftfooted West Covina, CA age: 50	Guys would you like for a woman to call of text you first? Is it to forward? Just because a woman were to call or text first dosent mean anything,I'd be a fool to think something other then what she has or had stated,thinking that it is too forward for a woman to call first would mean that I would have a opinion of her based just on the fact that she called first.
11/4/2009 2:51:27 PM	Settle this Debate:
wolfmanart Minneapolis, MN age: 60	Bottom line baby is if you are interested you do whatever is necc to make your intensions known and a man will respect you for that immensely. The one thing we get tired of is games or uncertainty. Now I found the woman of my dreams right here on Date Hookup but there was no games and a woman that told it like it was! You know a lot of people here dont know what the f**k they want and play a lot of bullshit and most carry baggage! My attitude is state what you want and go get it.........key here is like me and my lady say a win win situation!
11/4/2009 7:12:33 PM	Settle this Debate:
yellow_moon Trenton, NJ age: 35	I don't think the movie was trying to tell us girls not to make the first move, but not to make excuses when I guy doesn't respond the same way. If you text, email or call a guy wait for him to respond, do not smother him with a million messages. If he does not respond to your messages well he is not that into you, so move on. I tend to wait for the guy to make the moves. If after the first date the guy tells me he will call me, I won't call. Making the first move is fine as long as you are aware that the other person may not reciprocate.
11/5/2009 2:45:45 AM	Settle this Debate:
life2short6 Granbury, TX age: 53 online now!	The possibilities increase once one steps out of the box and go against the norm... If you always do what you always did, you'll always get what you always got. How many potential relationships can one miss, because they didn't do what they wanted to. Nothing wrong telling someone your interested.
11/5/2009 7:38:37 AM	Settle this Debate:
oceandive Atlanta, GA age: 52	Quote from s1owhand: everybody likes to get mail and phone calls. so mail or call somebody today! it's fun, easy, cheap and makes you and the recipient both feel good! your statement of 'everybody' is not entirely true....i don't do phone calls....i spend every bit of 2 minutes on the phone....my phone usage is based on a 'need to know right now' stance.....and then it is conducted on the same principal....short and to the point...then it's toodle loo as for mail.....the same principal as phone calls..... as for the first move,,,i have no prob with that...but once the ball is in your court...i'll ring the bell once more in order to cover any unseen problem....after that...it's up to you... [Edited 11/5/2009 7:40:10 AM PST]
11/5/2009 7:45:29 AM	Settle this Debate:
alexand7 Rockingham, NC age: 31	I hate mind reading games so I will call, not text and let him know I am interested. Like you said he can ignore me or say no thanks, no big deal. Everyone needs to hear rejection sometime in order to stay humble.
11/5/2009 8:28:28 AM	Settle this Debate:
gambler1040 Beaumont, TX age: 46	i'm the most humble person i know then....tfs
11/5/2009 10:32:14 AM	Settle this Debate:
gaboystuckinky Fort Campbell, KY age: 34	To be honest it would be nice to have the woman make the frist move so if you really like the guy make the frist move and see what happens only two things can happen he say yes or he say no and then you move on good luck with your debate
11/5/2009 4:08:38 PM	Settle this Debate:
sugrnspice2 Port Saint Lucie, FL age: 51	I still like to have the guy call me first. If we've gotten far enough for me to have given him my phone number, I expect him to call. After that..it's an open game on either side and I call and do call when I want to.
11/5/2009 6:53:36 PM	Settle this Debate:
firstlight Strasburg, VA age: 49	I think that everyone, men and women, in this day of instant messaging should let a new potential SO know that they are interested. No stalking or repeated phone calls, texts, emails, etc; but an initial message after a date/ meet, so you know. It amazes me sometimes that we now have the most sophisticated forms of communication we have ever had in the history of man, but yet we can't let someone know we are interested. There is always someone else waiting in the wings so why miss an opportunity because of some archaic "rules".
11/6/2009 3:13:28 AM	Settle this Debate:
milo1234 Jacksonville, FL age: 44	I say that it's a two way street. If I'm interested then I will call or text. He if isn't interested he has the option of saying so or not responing. Why sit at home and stare at my phone? Guys would you like for a woman to call of text you first? Is it to forward? I think your right on with your thinking. Like most have said its great for both males and females to initiate communication. It sucks when one partner has to do all the initiating, the calling, the planning (all actions of giving something). If you find yourself in that situation assess your needs.

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