The Most Functional English Word

THE MOST FUNCTIONAL ENGLISH WORD

HOPE THIS MAKES YOU SMILE THE MOST FUNCTIONAL ENGLISH WORD Well, it's shit .. . that's right, shit!S hit may just be the most functional word in the English language.

You can smoke shit, buy shit, sell shit, lose shit, find shit, forget shit
And tell others to eat shit.

Some people know their shit, while others can't tell the difference Between shit and shine (not quite sure what that is).

There are lucky shits, dumb shits and crazy shits. There is bull shit, horse shit and chicken shit.

You can throw shit, sling shit, catch shit, shoot the shit or duck when the shit hits the fan.

You can give a shit or serve shit on a shingle.
You can find yourself in deep shit or be happier than a pig in shit.

Some days are colder than shit, some days are hotter than shit
And some days are just plain shitty.

Some music sounds like shit, things can look like shit and there are times when you feel like shit.

You can have too much shit, not enough shit, the right shit, the wrong shit or a lot of weird shit.

You can carry shit, have a mountain of shit or find yourself up shit creek without a paddle.

Sometimes everything you touch turns to shit and other times you fall in a bucket of shit and come out smelling like a rose.

When you stop to consider all the facts, it's the basic building block of the English language.
And remember, once you know your shit, you don't need to know anything else!!

You could pass this along, if you give a shit; or not do so, if you don't give a shit!

Well, Shit, it's time for me to go. Just wanted you to know that I do give a shit and hope you had a nice day, without a bunch of shit.

11/19/2009 4:01:31 PM	The Most Functional English Word
shari1955 Butler, KY age: 54
11/19/2009 4:02:45 PM	The Most Functional English Word
eagles2bare New Albany, MS age: 53	no shit?
11/19/2009 4:05:48 PM	The Most Functional English Word
cleymax Milwaukee, WI age: 59	And you're first understanding this now?... ........................Oh Shit!
11/19/2009 4:06:58 PM	The Most Functional English Word
shari1955 Butler, KY age: 54	No shit, Oh shit, shit, shit, shit, lol
11/19/2009 4:12:04 PM	The Most Functional English Word
cleymax Milwaukee, WI age: 59	Quote from shari1955: No shit, Oh shit, shit, shit, shit, lol OK...Now you're just handing me a line of Shit.
11/19/2009 4:13:23 PM	The Most Functional English Word
sorpstar Wayne, NJ age: 57	in addition You can get shit-faced, Be shit-out-of-luck, Or have shit for brains. With a little effort, you can get your shit together, find a place for your shit, or be asked to shit or get off the pot. [Edited 11/19/2009 4:22:49 PM PST]
11/19/2009 4:30:56 PM	The Most Functional English Word
fishingmom Lake Alfred, FL age: 55	Hot shit
11/19/2009 4:31:33 PM	The Most Functional English Word
zzjonze Springfield, MO age: 56	I've been up "shit creek" ZZ
11/19/2009 4:37:35 PM	The Most Functional English Word
shari1955 Butler, KY age: 54	where you been zzzzz you haven't posted since 9-28 til yesterday.. thought you found the love of your life lol..oh shit lol [Edited 11/19/2009 4:38:03 PM PST]
11/19/2009 4:42:30 PM	The Most Functional English Word
eagles2bare New Albany, MS age: 53	that was some good shit.....
11/19/2009 4:44:09 PM	The Most Functional English Word
taxlady Florence, SC age: 59	Holy shit
11/19/2009 4:45:19 PM	The Most Functional English Word
zzjonze Springfield, MO age: 56	Quote from shari1955: where you been zzzzz you haven't posted since 9-28 til yesterday.. thought you found the love of your life lol..oh shit lol HAAAAAAA Aint no such shit as that HEHEHHEEEEEE Just been playin poker..... Did ya Miss me? [Edited 11/19/2009 4:46:00 PM PST]
11/19/2009 4:50:21 PM	The Most Functional English Word
shari1955 Butler, KY age: 54	Quote from zzjonze: HAAAAAAA Aint no such shit as that HEHEHHEEEEEE Just been playin poker..... Did ya Miss me? Yes I did and so did alot of the other women on here..lol
11/19/2009 4:51:35 PM	The Most Functional English Word
zzjonze Springfield, MO age: 56	Quote from shari1955: Yes I did and so did alot of the other women on here..lol Well I'll be Shit, no one told me. ZZ
11/19/2009 4:52:47 PM	The Most Functional English Word
jennyann71 Clarksville, AR age: 69	Amazing shi##
11/19/2009 4:54:41 PM	The Most Functional English Word
sorpstar Wayne, NJ age: 57	some of you may or may have not met the rest of shari's family The Schitt family Jack is the only son of Awe Schitt and O. Schitt.Awe Schitt, the fertilizer magnate, married O. Schitt, a partner of Kneedeep &. Schitt Inc. In turn, Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt, and the deeply religious couple produced 6 children: Holie Schitt, Fulla Schitt, Giva Schitt, Bull Schitt, and the twins: Deep Schitt and Dip Schitt. Against her parents' objections, Deep Schitt married Dumb Schitt, a high school drop out. After being married 15 years, Jack and Noe Schitt divorced. Noe Schitt later married Mr. Sherlock, and because her kids were living With them she wanted to keep her previous name. She was known as Noe Schitt-Sherlock. Dip Schitt married Loda Schitt and they produced a nervous son, Chicken Schitt. Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt were inseparable throughout childhood and subsequently married the Happens brothers in a dual ceremony. The wedding announcement in the newspaper announced the Schitt-Happens wedding. The Schitt-Happens children were Dawg, Byrd, and Hoarse. Bull Schitt, the prodigal son, left home to tour the world. He recently returned from Italy with his new bride, Piza Schitt. So now if someone says, "You don't know Jack Schitt", you can correct them. Not only do you know Jack, you know his whole family!
11/19/2009 4:56:47 PM	The Most Functional English Word
eagles2bare New Albany, MS age: 53	enough in here....gotta shit and get
11/19/2009 5:04:38 PM	The Most Functional English Word
trisha1 Erie, PA age: 60	Oh poop
11/19/2009 5:19:49 PM	The Most Functional English Word
backtofla Ormond Beach, FL age: 60	And remember kids,..'ya can't make chicken salad outta' chicken shit..."
11/19/2009 5:33:54 PM	The Most Functional English Word
shari1955 Butler, KY age: 54	I have said this many times..You know your old when a good shit is the best part of your day...This is soooo true loll
11/19/2009 5:37:55 PM	The Most Functional English Word
sorpstar Wayne, NJ age: 57	i'm tying to right now after i took that schitt for tomorrow--holy schitt for sure but when
11/19/2009 5:40:04 PM	The Most Functional English Word
cynthia1234 Kendallville, IN age: 53	This is funny shit!
11/19/2009 5:40:34 PM	The Most Functional English Word
binbasha Pittsfield, IL age: 55	well now aint all this just the shits
11/19/2009 5:41:36 PM	The Most Functional English Word
keepmelaffn Orange, CA age: 61	Holy shit! You guys are F-U-N-N-Y!!!!
11/19/2009 5:49:33 PM	The Most Functional English Word
shari1955 Butler, KY age: 54	where is the bull this is his kind of thread.. farts and shits and bull manure. He is hiding somewhere I see he has left his mark welcome keepmelaffn [Edited 11/19/2009 5:50:04 PM PST]
11/19/2009 5:52:54 PM	The Most Functional English Word
pinkster54 Port Byron, IL age: 55	What's all this shit about? Oh ZZ better get you shit together
11/19/2009 5:59:33 PM	The Most Functional English Word
shari1955 Butler, KY age: 54	Quote from pinkster54: What's all this shit about? Oh ZZ better get you shit together Thats zhits pink
11/19/2009 6:09:04 PM	The Most Functional English Word
obnota Portland, OR age: 61	....Hey, don't try pulling that Shit on me....
11/19/2009 6:15:35 PM	The Most Functional English Word
cynthia1234 Kendallville, IN age: 53	What the h.... kinda shit is this??
11/19/2009 6:17:41 PM	The Most Functional English Word
shari1955 Butler, KY age: 54	Quote from obnota: ....Hey, don't try pulling that Shit on me.... You do give a shit don't ya darlin...Ya going to wake me up in the morning..
11/19/2009 6:22:56 PM	The Most Functional English Word
obnota Portland, OR age: 61	Quote from shari1955: You do give a shit don't ya darlin...Ya going to wake me up in the morning.. ....I would honey, but you keep leaving shit unfinished....
11/19/2009 6:29:08 PM	The Most Functional English Word
shari1955 Butler, KY age: 54	Quote from obnota: ....I would honey, but you keep leaving shit unfinished.... Not my fault if things keep changing it's mind..
11/19/2009 7:30:54 PM	The Most Functional English Word
aintgonahappen Centerville, MO age: 59	A thinking cap for chit heads
11/19/2009 7:44:05 PM	The Most Functional English Word
nenebubbles Naperville, IL age: 68	ToroPoop, you can't fool me ... this is your opportunity to use one of the seven words that got Lennie in so much trouble only 50 short years ago. And I hope you had a nice day without a bunch of shit.
11/20/2009 1:10:52 AM	The Most Functional English Word
darlenemi51 Onaway, MI age: 57	It's not that I don't have my shit together, it's just too heavy to pick up. [Edited 11/20/2009 1:11:42 AM PST]
11/20/2009 1:12:24 AM	The Most Functional English Word
frenchmarie Mérignac France age: 52	i thought it was God ..
11/20/2009 1:54:10 AM	The Most Functional English Word
shari1955 Butler, KY age: 54	shit !!!! THAT DAMN ALARM...off to work..
11/20/2009 3:12:28 AM	The Most Functional English Word
huronearth Beulah, MI age: 57	Sounds vaguely like a George Carlin routine... but, we could use less SHIT and more George Carlin!!!
11/20/2009 8:10:39 AM	The Most Functional English Word
andornot Paint Rock, AL age: 56	... from the Andornot ... s.h.i.t. ... has various etymologies ... one goes like this ... in the 1880s certain types of manuure used to be transported by ship (some of which was used by steam ships to burn instead of wood because it was lighter and cheaper) ... well, in a dry form it weighs alot less, but once in water (at sea) hit it, it not only became heavier, but the process of fermentation began, and one of the products is methane gas ... and as the stuff was stored below decks in bundles you can see what could (and did) happen, methane began to build up below decks and the first time someone came below at night with a lantern ... BOOOM!!! ... several ships were destroyed in this manner before it was discovered what was happening. After that the bundles of manure were stamped with S.H.I.T. on them which meant to sailors to "Ship High in Transit" ... In other words, high enough off the lower decks so that any water that came into the hold would not touch the volatile cargo ...
11/20/2009 1:12:00 PM	The Most Functional English Word
bluebird77 Portland, OR age: 53	LOL lol lol . WHAT A CROCK A SHIT THIS IS.
11/20/2009 1:15:45 PM	The Most Functional English Word
plmsprgsbunny Rancho Mirage, CA age: 56	I make candles and make one called Reindeer Poop. really a good seller this time of year along with the Snowmen Farts.
11/20/2009 1:23:06 PM	The Most Functional English Word
settee_for_2 Flower Mound, TX age: 56	Okay now! This is turning into a really shitty thread...
11/20/2009 1:24:14 PM	The Most Functional English Word
morles San Antonio, TX age: 65	No Shit....and I could give a Shit...
11/20/2009 1:26:28 PM	The Most Functional English Word
sorpstar Wayne, NJ age: 57	You tell her Les she's already carrying her man andyonothing [Edited 11/20/2009 1:28:06 PM PST]
11/20/2009 1:27:58 PM	The Most Functional English Word
morles San Antonio, TX age: 65	Not only that Sorp....Obnota must have me Blocked...LOL...What a Chicken Shit.. ...................and Mr Andontohing is a Piece of Shit [Edited 11/20/2009 1:29:15 PM PST]
11/20/2009 1:28:34 PM	The Most Functional English Word
sorpstar Wayne, NJ age: 57	ditto--he does me too he doesn't like people like us taking up his territory--but what the heck you know women they go after those types came back as sorpstar and when I made my 1st post the coward blocked me [Edited 11/20/2009 1:31:30 PM PST]
11/20/2009 1:31:12 PM	The Most Functional English Word
andornot Paint Rock, AL age: 56	... from the Andornot ... what is this possessive ____t ... some sort of cyber ownership ...
11/20/2009 1:32:32 PM	The Most Functional English Word
sorpstar Wayne, NJ age: 57	andy boy eat some broccoli
11/20/2009 1:33:53 PM	The Most Functional English Word
morles San Antonio, TX age: 65	Andy your always welcome ... even with your Shitty and narrow minded outlook......LOL
11/20/2009 2:16:30 PM	The Most Functional English Word
morles San Antonio, TX age: 65
11/20/2009 2:19:08 PM	The Most Functional English Word
plmsprgsbunny Rancho Mirage, CA age: 56	A pirate walked into a bar and the bartender said, "Hey, I haven't seen you in a while. What happened? You look terrible." "What do you mean?" said the pirate, "I feel fine." "What about the wooden leg? You didn't have that before." "Well, we were in a battle and I got hit with a cannon ball, but I'm fine now." "Well, ok, but what about that hook? "What happened to your hand?" "We were in another battle. I boarded a ship and got into a sword fight. My hand was cut off. I got fitted with a hook. I'm fine, really." "What about that eye patch?" "Oh, one day we were at sea and a flock of birds flew over. I looked up and one of them shit in my eye." "You're kidding," said the bartender, "you couldn't lose an eye just from some bird shit." "It was my first day with the hook."
11/20/2009 2:21:23 PM	The Most Functional English Word
sorpstar Wayne, NJ age: 57
11/20/2009 2:22:42 PM	The Most Functional English Word
morles San Antonio, TX age: 65	Bunny is Funny........ ............This brings a new meaning to "HOOKER" [Edited 11/20/2009 2:23:37 PM PST]
11/20/2009 2:28:21 PM	The Most Functional English Word
shari1955 Butler, KY age: 54	This thread brings out the full of shit..HI morles...hey sorp...the rest of you are half full of shit lol..
11/20/2009 2:30:52 PM	The Most Functional English Word
plmsprgsbunny Rancho Mirage, CA age: 56	If you get half full of S... twice Will that make one totally full of S...
11/20/2009 2:31:54 PM	The Most Functional English Word
morles San Antonio, TX age: 65	Shari...Has anybody recently said you are "the Shits"
11/20/2009 2:58:59 PM	The Most Functional English Word
shari1955 Butler, KY age: 54	Quote from morles: Shari...Has anybody recently said you are "the Shits" Oh you sweet talker you.. [Edited 11/20/2009 2:59:13 PM PST]
11/20/2009 3:02:36 PM	The Most Functional English Word
lostinwyoming Evanston, WY age: 52	i just shit a brick laughing!
11/20/2009 3:03:24 PM	The Most Functional English Word
shari1955 Butler, KY age: 54	Quote from lostinwyoming: i just shit a brick laughing! Damn that had to of hurt lol
11/20/2009 3:12:29 PM	The Most Functional English Word
atlgarn2 Longwood, FL age: 54	Wellllllllllllllllllllllllll CRAP.

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