| 1/26/2008 5:19:59 PM |
Single dad or mom....who has it easier |
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mymustang2
Kingston, IL
age: 47
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Its near impossible to find a date with me having the kids. I cant find time to get out & look for that special person. So here we sit waiting for a wink!
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| 1/26/2008 9:13:56 PM |
Single dad or mom....who has it easier |
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amblarr
Struthers, OH
age: 22
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So I don't think it has anything to do with gender. I think it has to do with who's with the child more. If you're with them every day all day and the other parent has them only every other weekend, they have it easier. Its harder to make friends, date, anything. My daughters father is off having the time of his life and only sees her when he wants to. So who has it easier? Definitely him, but I'd rather be the one with my daughter anyway. I'd just like the chance to find love and have a life. But, once you've had a child, its forever.
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| 1/27/2008 9:16:01 AM |
Single dad or mom....who has it easier |
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tazamanaz
Concord, NH
age: 43
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Dads Seem to have it harder financially if thy dont have custody. But whatever it takes both parents have to be there for their child or children to insure a stable upbringing. We both support our sons dicisions and he made one to move in with me a year ago. Having him here has allowed me to listen more and offerring suggestions for maintaining the proper diection in life.
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| 1/29/2008 1:57:19 PM |
Single dad or mom....who has it easier |
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goodintention54
Plymouth, MI
age: 54 online now!
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Being a parent.... correction being a "good" parent is unarguably one of the toughtest yet rewarding jobs on the planet. As a couple or as a single parent it is a task with many challenges. I have been both mom and dad to my little ones for 4 years now ..three of which their mom was still in the house. ??? You see a little over four years ago she had a serious change in priorities (alcohol and drugs) she was in the house with us but wasn't there if you know what I'm saying. I tried like hell to get her help but I JUST COULDN'T FIX IT. She got more and more out of control to the point I had no choice but to go the courts and get full physical and legal parentship. (I hate the legal term "custody" it reaks of ownership like children are some kind of chattle). I'no raising two safe and happy children on my own. I have arranged with the courts for her to have supervised visitation because she is our childrens mom. I pray every day that she will get better fo the sake of our children..
Anyway, my point in all of this is that "easier" is a relative term predicated on individual circumstances. My little ones are now happy and thriving (a heavy load has been lifted off their tiny shoulders). Stuggling ? you bet... but for every grey hair they put in my beard they add ten laugh lines to my face.
God's strength to all you single parents
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| 1/30/2008 3:00:36 AM |
Single dad or mom....who has it easier |
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schoonlink
Connellsville, PA
age: 48
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I'd say it's a little harder on the female. I a lot of cases, not all, they don't earn as much as guys. and have to work two jobs. How easy could that be trying to raise your children, when your not there. Relying on friends, family, and babbysitters. Unfortunately, I have seeen this too many times. I am fortunate, to be there for my children full time.
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| 1/30/2008 2:33:31 PM |
Single dad or mom....who has it easier |
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pschne5231
Fishers, IN
age: 55
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I am a single dad raising three teenage boys by myself. ( and you wonder who has more problems).Money wise--it would be hard on either. On loneliness--I think it is harder on the man. Most women,even with children,can find companionship a lot easier then a single guy with children.Guys don't mind instant families but tell a single women that you have children and swish--they are on their way.
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| 2/1/2008 5:22:10 AM |
Single dad or mom....who has it easier |
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tsylos
Tasmania
Australia
age: 49
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This is a very tough question and like someone said previously, it really depends on each individual's circumstances. I was very fortunate in that after my wife died, there was no shortage of people who were willing to help look after my daughters while I was at work and during school holidays, then later, fortunate that I had a job which would allow me to work part time and thus I could be there for the girls. I guess the simple answer boils down to what networks one has in place to help with the bringing up with children. Yes we want to be fully involved in the bringing up of our children but sometimes work commitments, money and ex's make things hard.....the stress can be lessened if we are fortunate to have networks in place to help. Yes it can be hard if we are raising children of the opposite gender but being open in our communications and having people who can help in areas in which we are a bit hazy, helps immensely.
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| 2/2/2008 4:29:19 PM |
Single dad or mom....who has it easier |
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skmybgtoe
San Diego, CA
age: 27
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I think it's harder for a dad. Women have motherly instincts that men just don't have. But that's just what I think.
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| 2/3/2008 8:23:52 PM |
Single dad or mom....who has it easier |
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kathrynm
Roscommon, MI
age: 36 online now!
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No matter how hard it can be to raise your kids alone, and I do know that road, at least you have them. If someone is trying to take them from you, fight.
No matter if your a mom or a dad, it will be hard and sometimes VERY lonely. Losing your kids, never seeing them again, holding them, teaching them, watching them grow up, is much worse.
Would you do your life over with out them?
If yes is your answer, then you need to reevaluate.
If no, then remember, this to will pass and they will grow and be gone.
Then you can date and do whatever you want.
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| 2/4/2008 12:01:06 PM |
Single dad or mom....who has it easier |
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browneyedwoman
Lincoln Park, MI
age: 43
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Im a single mom of an eight year old girl. Her "father" would come and go in and out of her life. My child has him on a pedistal. She doesnt know why he dissapears without contacting her. I wont be the one to tell her what or why he is the way he is (drugs), even though Im the bad guy most of the time cause he isnt here. In my situation, I think my child has it harder, even though my heart breaks for her when she's wanting her dad to be a part of her life. Ill probably sound mean but, its his loss. He has missed so much already and who knows whats to come. Anyway I look at it, we all have an equally hard time.
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| 2/4/2008 12:37:51 PM |
Single dad or mom....who has it easier |
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victa
Waco, TX
age: 36
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i have my two kids more times a year than teir mother does yet i have to pay her support, if i have to work daycare. she sits home drinking dr.pepper doin meth with her child support. i take them clothes shopping at old navy and the gap. i put name brand shoes on them. if she ever gets them anything its from the dollar store. i try to make a better life for them she trys to keep them in the trailer park. all situations are different but i'd have to say i have it tougher than my kids mom. oh yeah and she gets to claim them both on her income tax return. she works like three months a year. my kids do love her but i assume when they get a little older they will see that i have always done right by them and tried my best and want to stay with me full time. right now they want to live with her. 
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| 2/6/2008 2:50:06 AM |
Single dad or mom....who has it easier |
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tsylos
Tasmania
Australia
age: 49
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Most of the comments regarding this have been to do with the bringing up of the children but let's for a moment look at it from a couple of other perspectives.
For all the guys out there who have teenage daughters, have they been reluctant to invite their girlfriends over to your house for a sleepover (I hope this has the same meaning in the US as it does here!!) or have parents of their girlfriends stopped their daughters from a sleepover at your house. There would not be this problem if it was a single mother and her child invited a male friend over for a sleepover so does that mean that sole parent men are discriminated against because of a perception.
Secondly, how about looking at single parents from the point of view of loneliness. Women are great at networking and will visit each other regularly however if a lady visited a man to have a coffee, tongues would be wagging and if a male visited another male....all hell would break loose.....and I would feel very uncomfortable with the latter anyhow.
Just a couple more ideas to throw out there for discussion......
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| 2/7/2008 7:33:36 PM |
Single dad or mom....who has it easier |
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gutthans
Deland, FL
age: 56
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It is generically more difficult for men.
Men are not programmed to be mom's. It's easier for a mom to figure out how to throw a football than for a man to learn to be nurturing.
Women are more intuitive and can read between the lines better emotionally.
Women have a more robust and useful social network.
Men get discriminated against at most parent/child functions.
Children often feel more cheated/abandoned if left by the mom.
The judicial system favors women parents...so does the social service system.
All of these things can be compensated for, but women start ahead of the game...
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| 2/20/2008 4:04:02 PM |
Single dad or mom....who has it easier |
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bubs83
Queensland
Australia
age: 25
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hi i'm a single mum of 2 and my kids' father don't wish to see them even thought i made all the effort to take them to him for visits and to say hi and work when he was on lunch but since he's found his one whom he married he doesn't want anything to do with our kids cos he has his own happy little family he has not called in 18-20months.
IF u love ur child don't give up fight for her my kids father signed full custody over to me and we didn't even go to court..
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