| 7/21/2010 8:07:47 PM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
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mr_crowley
Aynor, SC
age: 42
|
I just realized that on top of my relationship & trust issues that i may be afraid of actually getting the love i deserve. I also realized that ive been putting myself in relationships that wont allow love to bloom. Does anyone else find themselves putting themself in these situations?
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| 7/21/2010 8:11:01 PM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
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captainjul1
Columbus, OH
age: 51
|
very guilty here, i have trust issues is why i stay single, i know im cheating myself for finding that love, but my issues stop me in my tracks.i hope one day before i get to old to change this.
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| 7/21/2010 8:11:07 PM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
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polefrog
Harriman, TN
age: 54
|
Yep! Defence.... We build walls to protect ourselves....that become our prison.
Defense? where is the spell chech?
[Edited 7/21/2010 8:12:22 PM ]
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| 7/21/2010 8:16:05 PM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
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captainjul1
Columbus, OH
age: 51
|
my wall is so thick no way can it be chizzled 
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| 7/21/2010 8:19:30 PM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
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captainjul1
Columbus, OH
age: 51
|
my wall is so thick no way can it be chizzled
yes i am talking to a man who im meeting in a week , still dosnt change my issues of trusting, have to give him a chance as i do for myself
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| 7/21/2010 8:35:17 PM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
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mr_crowley
Aynor, SC
age: 42
|
 hey frog long time no see. I dont know i think im getting to damn old, or something. I actually made myself vulnerable to and i just dont do that kinda shit.
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| 7/21/2010 8:44:09 PM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
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captainjul1
Columbus, OH
age: 51
|
i think thats how it starts we let people do this to us , then were left behind to clean up the mess,,,,,,,,jmo
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| 7/21/2010 9:00:17 PM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
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utahgal1
Ogden, UT
age: 50
|
It's a yepper. I'm a runner.
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| 7/21/2010 9:11:57 PM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
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mr_crowley
Aynor, SC
age: 42
|
Thats the thing that keeps us in this vicious cycle. WE FEEL LIKE PEOPLE ARE DOING THIS TO US. WHEN THE TRUTH IS, WE DO IT ALL TO OURSELF I realized the mistake i made as soon as i did it. Now i can only hope for understanding, empathy and compassion. Im tired of f**king up my own life and repeating the same mistakes. I have a heart, hidden behind my fear, pride and ego and im capable of giving love despite my feelings of being incapable of receiving love.
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| 7/21/2010 9:17:32 PM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
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utahgal1
Ogden, UT
age: 50
|
Okay.........you make the first move and we'll follow you. 
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| 7/21/2010 9:20:10 PM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
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happygirl2930
Columbus, GA
age: 29
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I myself have openly messed up relationships with great ppl just for the fact i thought they were too good for me, or loved me too much. because after years of ppl telling you that you arnt good enough you begin to believe it yourself.
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| 7/21/2010 9:20:52 PM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
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captainjul1
Columbus, OH
age: 51
|
your so right on that we let this circle consume us till we cant get out of it, so sad it has to be like this we all need companion if nothing else ,
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| 7/21/2010 9:32:15 PM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
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mr_crowley
Aynor, SC
age: 42
|
after years of ppl telling you that you arnt good enough you begin to believe it yourself.
The beautiful woman who lives soooooo far away from me gets 1st prize here. I was a psych major n counselor to help abused & homeless kids, get over the feelings that are holding me captive. The irony sickens me.
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| 7/21/2010 9:40:10 PM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
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captainjul1
Columbus, OH
age: 51
|
I myself have openly messed up relationships with great ppl just for the fact i thought they were too good for me, or loved me too much. because after years of ppl telling you that you arnt good enough you begin to believe it yourself.
your so right happy
the world can be so cruel at a young age to us , we believe it after awhile.follows us to our adult stage then really messes us up.
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| 7/21/2010 9:51:09 PM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
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happygirl2930
Columbus, GA
age: 29
|
Guys i'm kidnapping the thread a minute....To my new friend you havnt posted anything which makes me think i said something wrong...if i did i'm sorry.ok folks we will now return to our regular schedualed programing.
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| 7/21/2010 10:14:02 PM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
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moth77
Glendale, AZ
age: 33
|
Definitely think that people are way to good for me. I meet someone that has everything going for them. While I struggle with some of the simpler things. I wonder why they are wasting their time on me. Maybe we all dont have to be equal but it sure makes things easier if we were all at the same point in their life..in my opinion. I look for some of their small flaws and blow them out of proportion to make it easy to keep my distance.
I know what my flaws are but fixing them is a whole new ball game. 
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| 7/22/2010 10:37:46 AM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
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lakelaunch
Virginia Beach, VA
age: 63
|
I for one am not afraid of getting the love I deserve.
I grew up in a loving family with parents who gave their all for my brothers and me. They taught us how true love behaves whether it be family or friend love and the transition was easy to erotic love that couples share and enjoy.
The problem is that the guys I meet have generally been afraid to accept what I can offer. I'm not a game player or a liar or a money grabber - I do seek certain attributes in men I come to love, and because I am not high maintenance, it's hard to accept that they are so unwilling to accept and appreciate the love I want to give them
Sounds kind of like a pitty party but it's not! Your posts have given me great insight and I so appreciate them. Thank you for helping me to understand this very real part of life!
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| 7/22/2010 2:08:03 PM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
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4everblest
Lagrangeville, NY
age: 63
|
I was a psych major n counselor to help abused & homeless kids, get over the feelings that are holding me captive. The irony sickens me.
Yeah, I know exactly where you are coming from as I was a certified mental health professional. I had/have great insight into my own behavior and lack of self-esteem, but it's taking me "baby steps" to overcome. I do not "feel" like I deserve love since I was never "good enough." Not as a child or a wife. Now that I am widowed I am finding my way into who I am and I am afraid that the guys I meet will only *see* the manufacturer's defect. I want love and to give love unconditionally, but do not feel like I can meet their expectations. I clam up from fear and run in the opposite direction. I sabotage any chance I get it seems. I have shared more here then I ever did at a therapists office. She gave bum advice and now this fellow will probably never allow me into his life again. BUT, do I really want to be in it? 
Blest  
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| 7/22/2010 5:38:32 PM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
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mymaxie61
Denver, CO
age: 49
|
for me it all about, that frist date.it all gose great,then he want sex and i dont know u that well. so he gets all mad,then come to fine out.he gets from someone who will f him. thats gose to show all men are pigs,i tell like it is. when i want sex u have to respect me,it gose borth ways. im may be old school,but i dont give it up so fast.
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| 7/22/2010 5:39:57 PM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
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shyimp
Burlington, VT
age: 51
|
Yes, I am afraid. I don't feel I deserve to be loved.
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| 7/22/2010 6:01:26 PM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
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lakelaunch
Virginia Beach, VA
age: 63
|
Yes, I am afraid. I don't feel I deserve to be loved.
shy, I'm coming up there to beat your butt! Of course you deserve to be loved! You are pretty, smart, knowledgable, and very lovable! Do not forget that! OK?
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| 7/22/2010 6:05:35 PM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
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4everblest
Lagrangeville, NY
age: 63
|
shy, I'm coming up there to beat your butt! Of course you deserve to be loved! You are pretty, smart, knowledgable, and very lovable! Do not forget that! OK?
^^^
We will all ride/fly together and pounce on her like her kitties do!
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| 7/22/2010 6:11:21 PM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
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lakelaunch
Virginia Beach, VA
age: 63
|
OK shy it's so far 2 to 1 and I expect more to join our team. Get it? You are a wonderful person for many reasons and we love you and want you to find true happiness!
Never, ever think you're unworthy, because, Dear, you deserve it all!!
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| 7/22/2010 6:35:24 PM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
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polefrog
Harriman, TN
age: 54
|
I guess the relationship that gives me the most trouble is the one I have with
ME
Working on it....
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| 7/22/2010 6:35:50 PM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
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joni1955
Ridley Park, PA
age: 55
|
Me too.
[Edited 7/22/2010 6:36:27 PM ]
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| 7/22/2010 9:08:06 PM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
|
nothingfake
Colorado Springs, CO
age: 43
|
We are all afraid and we all have been through pain and fear. We are all trying to "put ourselves back together again" and remember who we are and what we are worth. It seems that we all forget sometimes how important we are and what we have to offer. As long as we stay true to ourselves I know that whoever we will end up with, will be the one we need and deserve. To the OP- and all others- you are all wonderful and we are all afraid at times and we all want to feel like we deserve something better. I know that we are all special, each one in his/ her own way and we have things to offer that will be appreciated if the right one discovers us. I wish all of us LOVE 
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| 7/22/2010 9:13:04 PM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
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captainjul1
Columbus, OH
age: 51
|
Yes, I am afraid. I don't feel I deserve to be loved.
shy , honey why do you say things lkie that you are a beauitful woman
you have a heart so big i cant imagine no man not wanting you.
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| 7/23/2010 4:13:35 AM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
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lakelaunch
Virginia Beach, VA
age: 63
|
I guess the relationship that gives me the most trouble is the one I have with
ME
Working on it....
Gosh, pole, I guess that's true of us all! We are still under construction, as they say. As long as we chug along together, we'll have a fun journey, in spite of our MDs!
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| 7/23/2010 4:22:05 AM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
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rocknrolljen
Denver, CO
age: 35
|
Yep i'm a pusher I would rather push someone away rather then risk what may happen because in my mind its always going to turn out bad ..and it really sucks to be that way
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| 7/23/2010 6:12:36 AM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
|
shyimp
Burlington, VT
age: 51
|
shy, I'm coming up there to beat your butt! Of course you deserve to be loved! You are pretty, smart, knowledgable, and very lovable! Do not forget that! OK?
Oh such big words coming from such a tiny girl!
You do realize I can pick you up and put you on the top of a high shelf?
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| 7/23/2010 6:23:42 AM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
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captainjul1
Columbus, OH
age: 51
|
Yep i'm a pusher I would rather push someone away rather then risk what may happen because in my mind its always going to turn out bad ..and it really sucks to be that way
i hear you girlfriend im a pusher also , i have a guy ive been talking to for a month now, first thing i did was try and push him away, funny thing is he said it, stop trying to push me away i was stunned, most men dont catch on to what im doing, just had to share.
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| 7/23/2010 6:34:23 AM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
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shyimp
Burlington, VT
age: 51
|
Hi little sunshine girl!
If he noticed you were pushing him away, wow, he must be really paying attention to you.
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| 7/23/2010 6:59:02 AM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
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captainjul1
Columbus, OH
age: 51
|
Hi little sunshine girl!
If he noticed you were pushing him away, wow, he must be really paying attention to you.
oh yes he is , we talk on the phone and computer , hes a truck driver so dont really know when were going to meet, but its ok more time to get to know one another, dont know if im ready to take that next step so im content the way it is for now.
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| 7/23/2010 8:15:24 AM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
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joni1955
Ridley Park, PA
age: 55
|
Well, jul, that does sound like a good start and when it is meant to be, I am sure you will be comfortable meeting him. Good luck with that!
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| 7/23/2010 9:40:35 AM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
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shyimp
Burlington, VT
age: 51
|
That's the way I would like to get to know a guy. Chat and get comfortable first, then slowly get closer and meet.
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| 7/23/2010 9:54:17 AM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
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lakelaunch
Virginia Beach, VA
age: 63
|
Oh such big words coming from such a tiny girl!
You do realize I can pick you up and put you on the top of a high shelf?
Ahem ... Only after I beat your butt!
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| 7/23/2010 9:55:34 AM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
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captainjul1
Columbus, OH
age: 51
|
thank you ladies , we both decided on this way , were looking to be together a long time , yea
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| 7/23/2010 10:57:16 AM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
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shyimp
Burlington, VT
age: 51
|
Ahem ... Only after I beat your butt!
Oooooh, those is fightin' words!!
You do realize I'm twice as big as you, don't you?
Could smuggle you on a plane in my carry on suitcase!
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| 7/23/2010 11:01:41 AM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
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jennyann71
Clarksville, AR
age: 68
|
It's a yepper. I'm a runner.
Rnaway Bride? Loved that movie.
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| 7/23/2010 11:18:26 AM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
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utahgal1
Ogden, UT
age: 50
|
Always keep my track shoes nearby! lol
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| 7/23/2010 11:23:41 AM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
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rocknrolljen
Denver, CO
age: 35
|
i hear you girlfriend im a pusher also , i have a guy ive been talking to for a month now, first thing i did was try and push him away, funny thing is he said it, stop trying to push me away i was stunned, most men dont catch on to what im doing, just had to share.
Hey Julie I actually watn the guys hey Im going to try and push you away please dont let me 2 did'nt but obviously others have but I can see where they are coming from I mean us as women most likely would'nt put up with it so I cant blame them for not doing it
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| 7/23/2010 11:28:11 AM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
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moth77
Glendale, AZ
age: 33
|
For some reason this song seemed fitting
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| 7/23/2010 11:43:21 AM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
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moth77
Glendale, AZ
age: 33
|
Always keep my track shoes nearby! lol
One day someone will chase after ya. I know you are fast but there will always be someone faster. What a lucky person they will be 
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| 7/23/2010 1:57:56 PM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
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utahgal1
Ogden, UT
age: 50
|
One day someone will chase after ya. I know you are fast but there will always be someone faster. What a lucky person they will be
Aw, how sweet of you.........but I gotta say.....I run with my *baton* to beat the men as they get too close to me. lol
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| 7/23/2010 2:02:18 PM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
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moth77
Glendale, AZ
age: 33
|
Hmmm you are a fiesty little gal! I think I am a little scared of you now
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| 7/23/2010 2:14:58 PM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
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utahgal1
Ogden, UT
age: 50
|
Hmmm you are a fiesty little gal! I think I am a little scared of you now
Better!!! lol
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| 7/24/2010 9:45:38 AM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
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nothingfake
Colorado Springs, CO
age: 43
|
I think I have 2 sides to this. I WANT the love and let the person come closer; and then when it gets too close I get all freaked out and that's when I "pull a Utah' (tracking shoes with the baton...LOL)
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| 7/24/2010 9:49:11 AM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
|
chairpusher
Lexington, KY
age: 59
|
I just realized that on top of my relationship & trust issues that i may be afraid of actually getting the love i deserve. I also realized that ive been putting myself in relationships that wont allow love to bloom. Does anyone else find themselves putting themself in these situations?
Wall built up high here.
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| 7/24/2010 5:05:20 PM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
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elmsap
Red Mountain, CA
age: 62
|
What exactly is 'love'?, I keep thinking of the tina turner song, 'What's love got to do with it?'.
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| 7/24/2010 5:21:37 PM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
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utahgal1
Ogden, UT
age: 50
|
* nodding head* in agreement.
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| 7/25/2010 8:26:07 PM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
|
polefrog
Harriman, TN
age: 54
|
I guess love happens,.....but I'd rather hang out with someone I really like.....
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| 7/26/2010 8:58:46 AM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
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lakelaunch
Virginia Beach, VA
age: 63
|
I guess love happens,.....but I'd rather hang out with someone I really like.....
pole, you are a gentleman and a scholar! I like that!
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| 8/7/2010 11:54:52 PM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
|
theirsmybby
Randallstown, MD
age: 39
|
I just realized that on top of my relationship & trust issues that i may be afraid of actually getting the love i deserve. I also realized that ive been putting myself in relationships that wont allow love to bloom. Does anyone else find themselves putting themself in these situations?
 yes ... funny how that works huh. I wonder
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| 8/7/2010 11:59:00 PM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
|
theirsmybby
Randallstown, MD
age: 39
|
Thats the thing that keeps us in this vicious cycle. WE FEEL LIKE PEOPLE ARE DOING THIS TO US. WHEN THE TRUTH IS, WE DO IT ALL TO OURSELF I realized the mistake i made as soon as i did it. Now i can only hope for understanding, empathy and compassion. Im tired of f**king up my own life and repeating the same mistakes. I have a heart, hidden behind my fear, pride and ego and im capable of giving love despite my feelings of being incapable of receiving love.
DEEP..
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| 8/8/2010 12:05:01 AM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
|
theirsmybby
Randallstown, MD
age: 39
|
Definitely think that people are way to good for me. I meet someone that has everything going for them. While I struggle with some of the simpler things. I wonder why they are wasting their time on me. Maybe we all dont have to be equal but it sure makes things easier if we were all at the same point in their life..in my opinion. I look for some of their small flaws and blow them out of proportion to make it easy to keep my distance.
I know what my flaws are but fixing them is a whole new ball game.
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| 8/8/2010 6:11:12 AM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
|
joni1955
Ridley Park, PA
age: 55
|
Welcome to the group theirsmybby! Thanks for your input. Please keep coming back!
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| 8/9/2010 5:54:46 AM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
|
rhoni40
Athens, GA
age: 40
|
I think at some point in our life we have to just let it go and take a chance on love, I know I have always been afraid of the love I really deserve because as soon as I get to the point of where I feel I can open up and let that special someone see the real me , I tend to get my heart stomped on! It hurts like hell , but after being single for so many yrs now, off and on, Im tired of hiding, and it took me a long time to realize that I was the one that was stompin on my own heart , and I told myself no more, from now on if I get hurt I will get over it , if not then Im damn glad I decided to go for it again... I would much rather love and lose than to never love at all!
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| 8/9/2010 6:51:48 AM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
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rocknrolljen
Denver, CO
age: 35
|
Very well put Rhoni very well
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| 8/9/2010 5:53:40 PM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
|
jim_maddy
Winter Haven, FL
age: 44
|
I think for the first time in my life I am truly ready to love and be loved as I deserve. For so long I didn't know an important facet of my life..I'm bipolar. Not knowing this created lots of issues in the past. I've also gotten over many of my fears, and I truly want to communicate very well with someone. Now I just need to find the gal of my dreams, or at least a fantasy maybe??
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| 8/9/2010 6:40:24 PM |
Are you afraid of getting the love you really deserve? |
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crimsontater
Bryant, AL
age: 47
|
Uh, ooh, well, I can't seem to be able to bring my mind to the point where I think I "DESERVE" to be loved. Do I wish that I were fortunate enough to find a lady that could love me for who I am, absolutely. And I her. But do I somehow believe I "DESERVE" this, uh, ooh, ah, well.......
|