8/3/2010 8:16:53 AM |
Single mom advice needed |
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lucy_girl
Aurora, CO
age: 33
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Why are men afraid to actually "date" a single mom? If you're willing to sleep with her, why is it so bad to go to dinner or dancing and have a few drinks with her? Its not like the kids are going to too!
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8/3/2010 8:24:11 AM |
Single mom advice needed |
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patrickdempsey9
Oneonta, AL
age: 29
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i sent u an email and i personally dont have a problem dating a single mom
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8/3/2010 8:27:24 AM |
Single mom advice needed |
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latestflame
Germantown, TN
age: 33
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Because if you get close with someone who already has kids it can lead to problems since it seems kids end up resenting anyone at all who dates their parent. Also it's considered fine to turn down guys based on their income because the woman assumes he wants the woman to support him. No different than the assumption that a single mother wants to use the guy to support her children. They may both be bad assumptions, but it's considerd fine to have one standard and not another apparently.
I just think there's a lot of risk of drama whether it be with the kid's father or the kid himself/herself.
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8/3/2010 8:30:12 AM |
Single mom advice needed |
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smiley1960x
Melbourne, FL
age: 50
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Well, in my mind I work backwards from "No, no way am I adopting anyone's kids" and logically it ends up at "don't even get it started". Sure, you can say that your plan doesn't include eventual marriage and so on. But it would be crazy for me to believe it, and probability is more like either I break your heart later or I get stuck with the role and the bill.
Given that I will not take the responsibility, it's certainly kinder to you if I don't take up your time. But really it's about the risk of me doing so well that I end up doing very badly.
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8/3/2010 8:53:08 AM |
Single mom advice needed |
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tuff8seconds
Peyton, CO
age: 40
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Because they aren't men in the first place!!! They say you can tell a man's real character by how he treats dogs, children and waitresses. They are snakes who would be indifferent to something you love so much.
And believe me, not near all of the men you encounter will feel like that. The man you are looking for will be thrilled to spend time with your children AND yourself. The ones that are afraid are simply too young, or, not for you. Not now and not ever.
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8/3/2010 8:59:58 AM |
Single mom advice needed |
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dateable1
Berea, KY
age: 45
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Because if you get close with someone who already has kids it can lead to problems since it seems kids end up resenting anyone at all who dates their parent.
Not true! My daughter is actually the one who encouraged me to build a profile on a dating site. Saying, "Mom, everybody needs somebody to love." Pretty insightful for a child I think.
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8/3/2010 9:11:28 AM |
Single mom advice needed |
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arkansasnman
Fayetteville, AR
age: 47
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Why are men afraid to actually "date" a single mom?
I see dozens of threads where people are asking, "Why won't people date ______?" Well, this is America and we get to be as picky and crazy choosey as we want. If it's acceptable for someone to base their dating pool on weight, money, looks, height, location, etc........why is it hard to understand that children wouldn't make an impact?
We are allowed preferences…..and that's just another of them.
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8/3/2010 9:16:14 AM |
Single mom advice needed |
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gittyup4u
Moore, SC
age: 55
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You will need to find a guy that is willing to take the package deal. Any guy will have sex just make sure they are aware of the package...if not then what do you expect? I just saying...
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8/3/2010 9:22:50 AM |
Single mom advice needed |
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latestflame
Germantown, TN
age: 33
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Because they aren't men in the first place!!!
Wrong. Women are very judgmental and picky, yet men are cazlled "not men" if they have anything on their list.
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8/3/2010 9:24:05 AM |
Single mom advice needed |
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latestflame
Germantown, TN
age: 33
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Not true! My daughter is actually the one who encouraged me to build a profile on a dating site. Saying, "Mom, everybody needs somebody to love." Pretty insightful for a child I think.
There are always exceptions, but the "fear" is that it could end up being an issue.
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8/3/2010 9:39:11 AM |
Single mom advice needed |
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arkansasnman
Fayetteville, AR
age: 47
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Quote from dateable1:
Not true! My daughter is actually the one who encouraged me to build a profile on a dating site. Saying, "Mom, everybody needs somebody to love." Pretty insightful for a child I think.
Quote from latestflame:
There are always exceptions, but the "fear" is that it could end up being an issue.
......and the 6th grade debate team learns about gen-er-al-i-za-tions.....say it with me now...
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8/3/2010 9:43:28 AM |
Single mom advice needed |
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latestflame
Germantown, TN
age: 33
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In this case it's usually true. And by the same token I can state that when people don't date me due to assumptions also.
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8/3/2010 9:45:11 AM |
Single mom advice needed |
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arkansasnman
Fayetteville, AR
age: 47
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In this case it's usually true. And by the same token I can state that when people don't date me due to assumptions also.
....and you have the inside track on women's behavior....??.....how?
I'd guess you don't date many of them.
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8/3/2010 9:48:06 AM |
Single mom advice needed |
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latestflame
Germantown, TN
age: 33
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Almost all of my friends have been female for many years and I observe people well and I see patterns in people whether it be friends, girlfriends, people i observe posting, people in society, etc... Why do you think this woman amde the topic? Because it's true that most men do ehsitate to date single mothers just as they hesitate tod ate smokers and murderers.
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8/3/2010 9:57:04 AM |
Single mom advice needed |
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arkansasnman
Fayetteville, AR
age: 47
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Almost all of my friends have been female for many years and I observe people well and I see patterns in people whether it be friends, girlfriends, people i observe posting, people in society, etc... Why do you think this woman amde the topic? Because it's true that most men do ehsitate to date single mothers just as they hesitate tod ate smokers and murderers.
Men don't hesitate dating single mothers like they do with muderers.
Idiot.
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8/3/2010 10:46:38 AM |
Single mom advice needed |
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bigbuck4u
Richmond, VA
age: 51
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Almost all of my friends have been female for many years and I observe people well and I see patterns in people whether it be friends, girlfriends, people i observe posting, people in society, etc... Why do you think this woman amde the topic? Because it's true that most men do ehsitate to date single mothers just as they hesitate tod ate smokers and murderers.
.... can't help myself, your so full of s--t...
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8/3/2010 10:53:58 AM |
Single mom advice needed |
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1lonlynumber
McAllen, TX
age: 54
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HEY LICY GIRL, YOUR PHOTO IS NICE. THE ANSWER TO YOUR QUESTION IS THAT MEN DO NOT WANT THAT EXTRA BAGGAGE! ALSO WITH KIDS INVOLVED A RELATIONSHIP FOR A MAN IS HARD BECAUSE KIDS NOW A DAY SAY THINGS THAT CAN GET YOU THE MAN IN TROUBLE. NOW COMES IN THE X HUSBAND TO GET THE KIDS AND WANTS TO TALK TO YOU AND SEEMS LIKE THE X OWNES YOU BECAUSE OF THE KIDS. I HAVE SEEN THAT WITH MY FRIENDS AND NEVER WORKS. YOU ARE A BEAUTIFUL WOMAN AND WOULD NOT MIND GOING OUT WITH YOU BUT THERE SEEMS TO BE PROBLEMS!
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8/3/2010 10:56:07 AM |
Single mom advice needed |
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grneydsnglmale
Grand Junction, CO
age: 52 online now!
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Why are men afraid to actually "date" a single mom? If you're willing to sleep with her, why is it so bad to go to dinner or dancing and have a few drinks with her? Its not like the kids are going to too!
If you needed a definition of LOSER...STAY AWAY...that would be it. C'mon, seriously?
I would say spend some time somewhere OTHER than the bedroom FIRST...if there are reasons why he/she can't, well...make a liist and scratch em off it...
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8/3/2010 10:56:37 AM |
Single mom advice needed |
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icuddle
Salem, OR
age: 58
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It's not fear. It is the facts that: she rarely has time for him, she tries to make him a surrogate daddy, she won't disciplinne her brats...or let him do it, the kids keep trying to shove him out to re-unite Mommy with Daddy, and most guys use single sites to find sex, and dates...not ready made families. Then there is alwasys the ex who tries to butt in, and get her back...or is not around, but will be when he gets out of prison... or is not around physically, but left her so scarred mentally, and emotionally, that he may as well be sitting in her lap. Too many hassels for too litlle return. Besides which, many a Mom DOES insist upon taking the kids on the dates. Thanks, but no thanks. Been there, done that, learned my lesson; too often, but...never again.
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8/3/2010 11:00:09 AM |
Single mom advice needed |
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latestflame
Germantown, TN
age: 33
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icuddle apparently you're "not a man" if you don't want that.
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8/3/2010 11:12:57 AM |
Single mom advice needed |
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namikia
Paterson, NJ
age: 18
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Why are men afraid to actually "date" a single mom? If you're willing to sleep with her, why is it so bad to go to dinner or dancing and have a few drinks with her? Its not like the kids are going to too!
From my point of view guy who are like that are asses when you meet the right man you will know because hell love you and the kids and hell look for the best for you all of you he would want to spend time with the kids not just say well i really like you but i cant stand the kids BIG NO NO thats time for that guy to go go i hate men like that but still the right guy will want you and your kids especailly if he really has feelings for you
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8/3/2010 11:17:11 AM |
Single mom advice needed |
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rob2k
Mocksville, NC
age: 36
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I myself am a single parent. When I meet someone, I don't want her to be my son's mother, he has one. But I would expect her to be a good role model and be nice to him and respect him, leave any discipline to me. If you are a decent person, kids will like you, period. Especially if the children are well brought up. I think, a mature person will be able to include the child in there life and not have to be their parent, unless it grows into that capacity. I would never throw away the chance to help instill good values in a child if that's where the relationship took it.
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8/3/2010 11:22:30 AM |
Single mom advice needed |
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latestflame
Germantown, TN
age: 33
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guys are not "asses" to care about things such as that. Women judge on much more.
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8/3/2010 11:52:39 AM |
Single mom advice needed |
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75scott
Colorado Springs, CO
age: 35
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You chose the wrong men. It doesn't mean all are the same when you pick a type.
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8/3/2010 1:12:47 PM |
Single mom advice needed |
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annienoel
Amsterdam, OH
age: 28
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Wow girl u have a REALLY good question here!
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8/3/2010 1:49:57 PM |
Single mom advice needed |
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icuddle
Salem, OR
age: 58
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latestflame - I am man enough to settle for adult women, rather than always chasing teens, as you do.
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8/3/2010 1:56:08 PM |
Single mom advice needed |
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latestflame
Germantown, TN
age: 33
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icuddle I was being sarcastic because of what a moron said in here!
Speaking of that though dr. phil remidned me of you when he was just talking about promiscuous teens. Someone else was watching it and said this one girl looked 25 and was really 14 and I was reminded you posting and claiming people can magically know someone's age by looking at them.
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8/3/2010 4:34:36 PM |
Single mom advice needed |
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spider77
Adamsville, AL
age: 59
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Turn the situation around, and be fair. You think any hot young lady with a degree ( s ), their own money, a great job, beautiful car( s ), is going to look twice at a guy who got custody of his kids, not no, but hell no!
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8/3/2010 4:36:35 PM |
Single mom advice needed |
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bigdaddyforyou
Henderson, NV
age: 30
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we all know how desperate single moms are, and easy.
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8/3/2010 4:39:55 PM |
Single mom advice needed |
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mindovermatter6
Waterford, MI
age: 50 online now!
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Why buy the cow is the milk is free?
They are cheep?
They don't know how to dance?
They are lazy?
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8/3/2010 5:48:10 PM |
Single mom advice needed |
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latestflame
Germantown, TN
age: 33
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If a woman has kids she took the chance that it would affect her dating life. Too many people do thigns and think nobody should care. Kind of like the young women who go ahving sex with 100 guys and then have abortions because they don't want to take responsibility for their actions.
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8/3/2010 6:12:18 PM |
Single mom advice needed |
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heewho
Dallas, OR
age: 40
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we all know how desperate single moms are, and easy.
Really? I'm not sure why this comment ticked me off other then it's stupid. A single mother just like a single father has responsibilities. If she is a good mother she does them. If she is selfish her kids get put on the back shelf while she tries to find a new daddy. It's not about the title the person carries but about the character they live their lives by. In every group of people single mothers, fathers, men, women, etc... there are those with strength and those who are doorknobs. Choose wisely and the right one will be there, and leave the doorknobs in the drawer.
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8/3/2010 6:23:48 PM |
Single mom advice needed |
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rob2k
Mocksville, NC
age: 36
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Yeah, that kind of pissed me off too. But, I can see his point, some men see single mom's as desperate. And the vultures swoop down for what they think is easy prey. This is just what I've witnessed a few times in my life, and don't get me wrong, it takes a lowdown piece of shit to act that way. They will take advantage of the situation and be extremely fake just to "get lucky" and then they move on.
Please, be gentle with me, It's just a little insight to what some men do.
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8/3/2010 6:55:29 PM |
Single mom advice needed |
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blondie378
Palm Coast, FL
age: 42
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8/3/2010 7:38:54 PM |
Single mom advice needed |
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lucy_girl
Aurora, CO
age: 33
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Turn the situation around, and be fair. You think any hot young lady with a degree ( s ), their own money, a great job, beautiful car( s ), is going to look twice at a guy who got custody of his kids, not no, but hell no!
I totally disagree...there is something sexy about a single dad...if a man is man enough to be in his child(rens) lives probably has strong family values. I grew up in a very close family...the type that always found a reason to have a large gatherings.
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8/3/2010 7:56:22 PM |
Single mom advice needed |
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lucy_girl
Aurora, CO
age: 33
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I understand a pre-made family isn't for everyone, I understand the fear of having to deal with the "dreaded ex" but what I don't understand is why the people responding to this post want to fight with each other and argue over stuff that has nothing to do with the orginial post.
I never introduce my kids to my dates, when I do get them. I don't want the kids to be confused about why I have someone other than their father in my bed or is there in the morning. I have to know the person likes me for me and is worth a damn before he will ever see my daughters. I am very open and honest, probably too much sometimes...but that is me...maybe that is the real problem. I have a great job, make pretty decent money, a nice house in a fantastic neighborhood, great friends and a wonderful family and I don't think I look too bad for my age and having 3 daughters. But it was said before, we all have the idea of the right person in our minds and thanks to people like me [and my fellow brother at arms] we have the right to choose whom we want to be with.
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8/3/2010 8:23:08 PM |
Single mom advice needed |
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mindovermatter6
Waterford, MI
age: 50 online now!
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we all know how desperate single moms are, and easy.
Desperate, easy, clingy, dependent, too emotional, has a personality disorder, stalker, psycho, not thin enough, not pretty enought, not educated enough, doesn't have a lot of money blah, blah, blah!!!!!!
Welfare mother make better lovers!
Awe shit - and you men b*tch about us being independent too.
OP, send the kids off to dads on the weekend, take it slow, get to know someone,
I don't date because I don't want to seem desperate or easy. I don't date because there's alot of a-holes like bigdaddy out their, seems like a daddy who neglects and abuses, hope he don't have any children - daugthers especially.
I'm single, and single I'll remain because there are just too many creeps out there.
I wish, I made enought money to buy an escort, because you get what you pay for, you don't have to listen to their B.S., and when it done you can say that was fun but you gotta go......... Sound familure fellas?
Mindovermatter. Just brace yourself darling, only fools rush in, it really takes time to find a decent guy.
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8/3/2010 8:32:16 PM |
Single mom advice needed |
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dwnhomeroots
Blairsville, PA
age: 28
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we all know how desperate single moms are, and easy.
its asses like u the reason were single, i raise my three kids on there own, work ft and goin to school.. hmm real desperate! matter of fact i enjoy bein, were not emotionally unstable any more than u men who arent parents. it men like u that make chics hate men, u ruin it for the good men left out there somewhere on this earth, men like u are too dependant on us single moms in my opinion, b/c we have kids u expect to have ur cake and eat it too, wash my clothes, cook for me. ha!
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8/3/2010 8:45:28 PM |
Single mom advice needed |
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tallestdiva
Flint, MI
age: 35
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It is amazing how many men assume that single mothers are lazy, low income drama queens! My advice is to be careful! Seems everyone has motives! I hate dating and even more now with a son. So many pervs and freeloaders out here.
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8/3/2010 8:52:33 PM |
Single mom advice needed |
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keepalowprofile
Sturgeon Lake, MN
age: 48
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This really isn't "SINGLE MOM ADVICE" now is it???
Lots and lots of guys will have sex with women and NOT DATE THEM. For every reason under the sun. <~~ fact.
Look for someone that will date a woman with kids. There ya go. There's you're advice.
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8/3/2010 9:14:44 PM |
Single mom advice needed |
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leggsallover
Bakersfield, CA
age: 52
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Why are men afraid to actually "date" a single mom? If you're willing to sleep with her, why is it so bad to go to dinner or dancing and have a few drinks with her? Its not like the kids are going to too! Because we scream total responsibility...thx but, i take care of my own, a man is on the side
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8/3/2010 9:41:33 PM |
Single mom advice needed |
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luvh20bike
Salt Lake City, UT
age: 28
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I dont really know bout this thread but in my experience I have dated women with kids (i dont have any) and everyone of them have backed out of the (dating,relationship??) because they straight told me that they didnt think i had enough money to be able to support them WTF? It shouldnt be about a guy with a bus pass (not that i have one) and how much money he has that all totally superficial b/s...So i guess its just the type of person you meet cuz I knew what i was getting into and was cool wit it I guess the lawn the has the money put into it is greener
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8/3/2010 9:56:46 PM |
Single mom advice needed |
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d_lady
Duncanville, TX
age: 40
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Almost all of my friends have been female for many years and I observe people well and I see patterns in people whether it be friends, girlfriends, people i observe posting, people in society, etc... Why do you think this woman amde the topic? Because it's true that most men do ehsitate to date single mothers just as they hesitate tod ate smokers and murderers.
Mothers, Smokers, and Murderers! Wow.
I think "most men", as long as we're generalizing, have accepted that much of the dating pool is comprised of parents. Those that don't yet will either leave that dating pool forever (go and be happy!) or will change their minds when they re-enter as parents themselves! Funny how what's not OK changes to OK when we become "they".
The fear is the problem and how much of that it based on actual experiences? Kids aren't monsters - if the woman is worth being with, she's probably an OK mother with normal kids. Most parents aren't dating against their children's wishes or without their support, if they're old enough to even have an opinion (oops - another generalization based on my own situation)! Moms and Dads are the ones in a position to have to be very picky, imho, in the interest of protecting their kids from a parade of wo/men.
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8/4/2010 5:37:44 AM |
Single mom advice needed |
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spider77
Adamsville, AL
age: 59
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I totally disagree...there is something sexy about a single dad...if a man is man enough to be in his child(rens) lives probably has strong family values. I grew up in a very close family...the type that always found a reason to have a large gatherings.
Put identical twins together----1 is single with kids, 1 is single , never married, no kids, 99 out of 100 suitors will pick the 1 never married with no kids. A vast majority of people-----DON'T WANT TO RAISE SOMEBODY ELSE'S KIDS! You can argue till you are blue in the face, to save face, but they just DON'T.
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8/4/2010 7:44:46 AM |
Single mom advice needed |
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latestflame
Germantown, TN
age: 33
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I think "most men", as long as we're generalizing, have accepted that much of the dating pool is comprised of parents. Those that don't yet will either leave that dating pool forever (go and be happy!) or will change their minds when they re-enter as parents themselves!
Funny you say that, but people keep egttign mad if I say the same thing about women judging men and it suddenly is "different" then. Women want to hold on to stubborn judgments and tell others not to care about anything.
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8/4/2010 10:12:09 AM |
Single mom advice needed |
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petron
Garland, TX
age: 49
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those same men would date anyone with the intent of getting laid...it's not necessarily just single mothers.
also, they feel single mothers are easier to control as they are confined to home most of the time. easy prey so to speak. some s/m don't get a chance to get out much, so when they do, they take advantage of it. One thing leads to another and you're naked.
these men are also fairly good and persuasion.
if he's pushing too hard for physical attention, look the other way.
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8/4/2010 11:17:36 AM |
Single mom advice needed |
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latestflame
Germantown, TN
age: 33
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Nah. I don't care about sex and I'm one who would be reluctant tod ate a single mother. So it's definitely not all guys who are after sex. In fact if he thought being a single parent makes a woman desperate then he would assume he WOULD gef sex easily anyway.
Me personally I don't easily consider something a deal breaker. But they would have to be mighty great for me personality-wise. There are many things someone can do which makes it harder to date. Having kids is always going to be one of them and it's not wrong to consider it a consideration. Most people want to get married and then have kids, not date someone who already has kids.
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8/4/2010 12:37:20 PM |
Single mom advice needed |
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dateable1
Berea, KY
age: 45
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Turn the situation around, and be fair. You think any hot young lady with a degree ( s ), their own money, a great job, beautiful car( s ), is going to look twice at a guy who got custody of his kids, not no, but hell no!
I may not be that young but I have all those things and if the right man came into my life, I wouldn't shut him out simply because he had custody of his children.
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8/4/2010 1:21:37 PM |
Single mom advice needed |
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spider77
Adamsville, AL
age: 59
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I may not be that young but I have all those things and if the right man came into my life, I wouldn't shut him out simply because he had custody of his children.
And you're hot!
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8/4/2010 1:51:41 PM |
Single mom advice needed |
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doc_ii
East Moline, IL
age: 43
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Surely you didn't sleep with someone so quick as to not get to know each other? hence, having a nice dinner, movie, though a movie on the first date is a cop out on the guys part, minimal conversation and such. When you least expect it, it will happen.
peace!
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8/4/2010 6:49:21 PM |
Single mom advice needed |
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icuddle
Salem, OR
age: 58
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Single Moms come with much more 'baggage'/problems/hassels...and nothing more in the way of benefits. In fact, they have fewer benefits...less time to be with him, dates interrupted by calls from the babysitter, etc. If a guy can get all the love, sex, companionship, conversation, etc, he wants from a woman without all the baggage/ hassels/kids, why pass her by to settle for getting less love, sex, etc, from a woman with all the extra baggage/hassels?
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8/5/2010 7:34:40 AM |
Single mom advice needed |
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tony5592
Greenbrier, AR
age: 25
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In my opinion it's not the fact that kids are even an issue in the beginning of a relationship, if I like a woman who has kids i try and make the kids as comfterable as possible and gain trust with them before even dreaming of becoming intamate with their mother. I remember my mom dating when my folks got divorced at a young age, and the ones who were not out to take my mom from me i felt more comfterable around, the ones that would take us out with them, and they would always go on night dates when i was with my dad. i guess what i'm saying is, if you like this woman and want to make things work just remember to go in with the attitude that this woman is the one who i could see myself marrying, cause usually a single mom has had enough heart ache and any man that just wants to get a little should have to decentcy to put theirself in her shoes and picture what she must be going through.
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8/5/2010 7:53:58 AM |
Single mom advice needed |
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susieq1966
Collins, MS
age: 44
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Some men may not want the extra baggage. They don't want to/don't know how to deal with someone else's kids, simply because they might just want a casual encounter, or don't want to share their lives with little ones. And that's ok. But not ok for YOU. My girl is 17. NOBODY is good enough for mom. So mom keeps her out of the equation. Somebody I date will know OF her, but not get near her unless it's someone I might want to get serious with. We have been through a lot. I'm not putting her through more. Have patience. The right person will be there when you're NOT looking. Good luck to you.
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8/5/2010 5:50:37 PM |
Single mom advice needed |
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couldbesmarter
Bastrop, LA
age: 34
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what? you mean there are other type of women out there. lol. hell, almost all women after 20 got kids theses days. It be a lonely life if i only looked for good looking women my age that were kid less.
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8/5/2010 5:58:00 PM |
Single mom advice needed |
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barbaraajo
Reston, VA
age: 53
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then they are not right for you anyway
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8/5/2010 5:59:45 PM |
Single mom advice needed |
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d_lady
Duncanville, TX
age: 40
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what? you mean there are other type of women out there. lol. hell, almost all women after 20 got kids theses days. It be a lonely life if i only looked for good looking women my age that were kid less.
No joke! Men over 30 are about the same - so many singles now are divorced people, many of which (most of which?) have kids. A sad state (so many divorces), imo, but it's the truth!
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8/6/2010 1:26:58 PM |
Single mom advice needed |
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franklin37064
Franklin, TN
age: 31
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OP, you do look ok for your age and 3 kids , and I'm sure you have more to offer than that, but you must understand that not every man you like dreams to wake up being a dad with 3 children from the other guy(s). I bet you werent looking fo single dads with custody when you were childlesss. So there, you have to look for men with kids or you have to downgrade your requirements quite a bit in your potential groom--like income, looks, age, fattiness ets. And watch out for pervs, because you surely will meet a lot of them.
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8/6/2010 1:36:43 PM |
Single mom advice needed |
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jamesbrown40
Flint, MI
age: 40
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some men are scared of commitment to family
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8/6/2010 4:44:02 PM |
Single mom advice needed |
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george1965
Bedford, VA
age: 45
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dont see anything wrong with it.
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8/7/2010 9:18:29 PM |
Single mom advice needed |
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kountrygrl08
Lincoln, NE
age: 20 online now!
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There's a million reasons guys don't wanna date single moms. In my experience, he's 1. Afraid I will want/expect him to take care of me and my son (but don't take the time to realize I don't want OR need him to do so) or 2. They want to step in and play "dad" since my sons father isn't in the picture, but end up annoyed when I won't let him.
And as far as steering clear of single dads, I've never been the least bit turned off by it. I never have told a guy to get lost or just wanted sex from them because of having kids. One of my ex's had a daughter who turned 2 while we were together and while there were times we couldn't do something because of him having sole custody, I wouldn't have wanted anything different. He is an amazing father and even though we haven't been together for over a year, I have nothing bad to say about him. We just did a lot of stuff as a "family" once his daughter was introduced into everything. Our time was usually after she went to bed or every now and then when we could get a babysitter. I had no problem with his daughter being a part of our relationship, I took on a lot of things her mom would have been doing had she been in the picture.
A child shouldn't be held against someone when you are getting to know/dating someone - but it happens. When someone who's honestly mature and worth the light of day comes along, everything will work out.
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