1/15/2011 3:15:48 PM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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ldroftrollops
Goshen, INFagurhólsmýri
Iceland
age: 31
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http://bodyodd.msnbc.msn.com/_news/2011/01/12/5817763-guys-like-women-whove-been-dumped-study-suggests
I just read an article that basically said Men prefer women that have been dumped and women prefer men that do the breaking up. It had a couple of other interesting bits of information for a dating experiment they did on a "dating website". The link to the article is above.
I'm just curious if anyone has ever really put a thought into that while seeking dating partners?
Meet singles at DateHookup.dating, we're 100% free! Join now!
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1/15/2011 3:17:28 PM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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pepper1967
West Springfield, MA
age: 45
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Never even considered it. be seeing you.
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1/15/2011 3:18:11 PM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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earthygirl68
Atlanta, GA
age: 82
|
That is very interesting. I'm going to have to read that later to see why men would prefer that.
I would rather be with someone who broke off the last relationship. To me it says they wanted to move on, vs. someone else doing the moving on.
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1/15/2011 3:19:23 PM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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75scott
Parker, CO
age: 35 online now!
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No. There are way too many variables to get a clear picture.
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1/15/2011 3:20:38 PM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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mistymay77
Newnan, GA
age: 33
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I have never thought about that.
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1/15/2011 3:20:53 PM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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ladyog
The Dalles, OR
age: 55
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Cin..I don't know..but I've always been the one to end things..so what does that say about me..???? I want a man that stays till I'm through...
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1/15/2011 3:21:40 PM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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stobil
Gallatin, TN
age: 30 online now!
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I've never asked, but I would prefer a dumped woman.
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1/15/2011 3:26:02 PM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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earthygirl68
Atlanta, GA
age: 82
|
Why Stobil?
Ah, now I see...
Helps to read the article.
[Edited 1/15/2011 3:27:40 PM ]
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1/15/2011 3:27:22 PM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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stobil
Gallatin, TN
age: 30 online now!
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If she's the dumper, she's probably hard to please.
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1/15/2011 3:28:17 PM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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earthygirl68
Atlanta, GA
age: 82
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I can see where someone would get that, but it's not necessarily true..
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1/15/2011 3:28:51 PM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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122750again
Sioux Falls, SD
age: 60
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<-----Dumped, and not real fing happy about it either
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1/15/2011 3:30:46 PM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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ldroftrollops
Goshen, INFagurhólsmýri
Iceland
age: 31
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I agree Scott. I assume, that's why it never crossed my mind to ponder it.
I can see that side of it Earthy, it made me think of those that are never really ready to try again, because they're still caught up in the last relationship.
Why do you say that Stobil?
Ladyog, I don't really think it says anything about any of us, I think itve's way to limited to be realistic. And I'm at a tie for getting dumped or dumping someone, so I have no idea if I'm appealing to men in the context that article states women are...
Pepper,..I don't think many have ever thought about it
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1/15/2011 3:32:46 PM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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ldroftrollops
Goshen, INFagurhólsmýri
Iceland
age: 31
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Nevermind Stobil, Earthy beat me to it. In regards to the fictional her being hard to please,...that's only one aspect of it, there are numerous other reasons that are justifiable and necessary
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1/15/2011 3:35:43 PM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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tootitnbootit
Pomona, CA
age: 30
|
no , it never plays a part for me ..
reminds me of the saying though ...
one mans trash is another mans treasure ...
maybe , the men that do do it , feel they have a better chance with someone thats maybe vulnerable , needy , damaged goods ... idk
and , the women may prefer someone that will walk away ,over them having to do so ..
its easier to put the blame on the other person that way ...
hell, cin .... idk
maybe i shoulda just said no ...
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1/15/2011 3:37:11 PM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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bitsybon
Jacksonville, FL
age: 53
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By the way it's put here by you guys. I would have to go for the dumpee, over the dumper.
Also a dumpee may have something to prove.
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1/15/2011 3:38:53 PM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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myers911
Saunemin, IL
age: 44
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it really doesn't matter if she was dumped or did the dumping. she is going to compare you to her ex regardless.
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1/15/2011 3:39:05 PM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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ldroftrollops
Goshen, INFagurhólsmýri
Iceland
age: 31
|
LOL Toots,..I liked your response,..it made you ponder it. Did the same to me too. I agree with the Trash and Treasure theory.
And I'll admit, when I first started reading and got to the part about men preferring a woman that had been dumped my first thought was "of course,...easy prey"..but, apparently there is more to it than that.
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1/15/2011 3:40:06 PM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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klassy_klown
Bakersfield, CA
age: 42
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I can't read the article, but I do know I've been dumped very few times, and the last time really wasn't a good thing for the men who came into my life since then. Perhaps the long term effects will be more positive or perhaps being more of the dumper than the dumpee, those rules don't apply to me.
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1/15/2011 3:40:42 PM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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earthygirl68
Atlanta, GA
age: 82
|
Hiya Myers!
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1/15/2011 3:40:52 PM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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ldroftrollops
Goshen, INFagurhólsmýri
Iceland
age: 31
|
it really doesn't matter if she was dumped or did the dumping. she is going to compare you to her ex regardless.
You really think so? I think it does happen more often than not and many who say they don't do it, are bsing themselves,...but, on the other hand, I also think that might be a way for them to catch the infamous "red flags"...so, basically I dunno crap LOL
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1/15/2011 3:41:12 PM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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tootitnbootit
Pomona, CA
age: 30
|
what , did it touch on the whole " rescuer " subject ..
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1/15/2011 3:41:31 PM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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75scott
Parker, CO
age: 35 online now!
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I will add this. If she has done all the dumping, that can be a red flag for me. Particularly, if she is my age.
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1/15/2011 3:43:01 PM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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myers911
Saunemin, IL
age: 44
|
hello Earthy.
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1/15/2011 3:47:32 PM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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_settee
Flower Mound, TX
age: 57
|
Now there is a new concept..being the dumpee verses the dumper...
I'd like to say it was a mutual decision....but I've been dumped as many times as I've done the dumping..
I don't think that says a thing about me...really..
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1/15/2011 3:51:00 PM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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ldroftrollops
Goshen, INFagurhólsmýri
Iceland
age: 31
|
Now there is a new concept..being the dumpee verses the dumper...
I'd like to say it was a mutual decision....but I've been dumped as many times as I've done the dumping..
I don't think that says a thing about me...really..
Same here...I'm thinking, I really don't need another stigma attached to my longterm singlehood, (read as apparent commiment phobia) that one is already seriously inaccurate and I'm kinda annoyed that another stigma is possible
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1/15/2011 3:53:29 PM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
|
sherri_
Erlanger, KY
age: 49 online now!
|
http://bodyodd.msnbc.msn.com/_news/2011/01/12/5817763-guys-like-women-whove-been-dumped-study-suggests
I just read an article that basically said Men prefer women that have been dumped and women prefer men that do the breaking up. It had a couple of other interesting bits of information for a dating experiment they did on a "dating website". The link to the article is above.
I'm just curious if anyone has ever really put a thought into that while seeking dating partners?
*I* haven't, but I know some guys and gals who are like vultures then swoop in after the MOTAS has been dumped to get a rebound/sympathy f*k.
I wouldn't call that "dating" tho' so much as "predation".
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1/15/2011 3:57:26 PM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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ldroftrollops
Goshen, INFagurhólsmýri
Iceland
age: 31
|
*I* haven't, but I know some guys and gals who are like vultures then swoop in after the MOTAS has been dumped to get a rebound/sympathy f*k.
I wouldn't call that "dating" tho' so much as "predation".
Ugh...the thought of that is more pathetic that CSAH syndrome
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1/15/2011 3:58:09 PM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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earthygirl68
Atlanta, GA
age: 82
|
Scared to ask...
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1/15/2011 3:58:47 PM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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boodicca
Essex
United Kingdom
age: 58
|
How can anyone be sure that the story a new s/o is propounding is accurate?
Sometimes the apparent dumper is actually a dumpee!
Often the reasons for the split are total b/s. The reality is far uglier.
Boo
xxxx
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1/15/2011 4:00:13 PM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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ldroftrollops
Goshen, INFagurhólsmýri
Iceland
age: 31
|
Scared to ask...
hahahaha....Captain Save A Ho, aka, rescuers, fixers, and the liking.
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1/15/2011 4:03:46 PM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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pdforone
Litchfield, OH
age: 59 online now!
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No clue? Never been desperate, a couple I stayed with longer than I should have because we were married with kids. I don`t recall ever asking a lady anything other that if she was single and interested. How they became single didn`t seem like an issue unless they got the boot for cheating.
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1/15/2011 4:05:43 PM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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icuddle
Salem, OR
age: 58
|
Just because two things seem related does not mean that they are. If I interview five Texan women, and find that each of them drink excessive amounts of beer, and are Star Trek fans, I can claim correlations whether they exist, or not. If I say that viewing Star Trek causes alcoholism, data from 100% of the respondents to my survey supports the claim. Likewise, if I say that being born in Texas makes one prone to be born female, my data supports that claim. There may be no actual link between the factors cited in the dating site data. Even if there are links, it may be no more than that women try to re-unite with guys who dumped them, and when that fails, they are eager to date other guys who find gals on the rebound to be easy pick ups, and easy lays. WTF of it? You don't get to date averages, so such does not matter.
You date individuals. It is like flipping a coin. Over ten thousand flips, the number of 'heads', and the number of 'tails', which come up will be pretty much equal. However, if you are betting on the outcome of the next flip, the averages won't help you. You may have gotten 'heads' on each of a dozen of the last flips, and then get 'heads' again... or the next flip may be 'tails'...and neither the past, or the future, enter into the matter; as 'averages', or anything else. All that matters-to your winning, or losing-is the next flip. I don't worship trivia mongers, psuedo-science hawks, or apparent averages...so what seems to be, or not be-according to alleged pundits-does not effect me in the least. I do not fill my head with "what Oprah says about dating", or similar nonsense. I think of what I want to get, and what I have to offer in exchange for what I want to get, and I think of how to meet those who can meet my needs/desires. I don't think about whether they were recently the dumper, the dumpee, a widow, or any other immaterial matters.
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1/15/2011 4:05:59 PM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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sherri_
Erlanger, KY
age: 49 online now!
|
Ugh...the thought of that is more pathetic that CSAH syndrome
Isn't that part of that whole 'nice guy' thing that I've heard men discuss as to why a man can't be a friend to a woman? That the whole reason they're being a friend is to swoop in when the time is right for the plucking?
I know that theory is fatally flawed, but I also know/have experienced guys who do this (and women who do it to guys). I think in Victorian times widows were popular prey, no?
Is that what the article was mistakenly talking about? I still wouldn't call it dating, tho'.
What is CSAH?
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1/15/2011 4:06:03 PM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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nottoolate2011
Waco, TX
age: 63
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Never considered the premise. I've been dumped, and did some dumping. Being dumped is more unpleasant.
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1/15/2011 4:06:54 PM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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earthygirl68
Atlanta, GA
age: 82
|
hahahaha....Captain Save A Ho, aka, rescuers, fixers, and the liking.
Thanks hun. My poor tired brain ain't working so great today.
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1/15/2011 4:09:01 PM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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myers911
Saunemin, IL
age: 44
|
Thanks hun. My poor tired brain ain't working so great today.
you are still pretty though
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1/15/2011 4:11:22 PM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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earthygirl68
Atlanta, GA
age: 82
|
For an 80 y/o?
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1/15/2011 4:27:16 PM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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nostringsjstfun
Grand Junction, CO
age: 41
|
The article is very interesting and some times true without someone realizing they're doing it. After a lot of soul searching I had realized that I kept attracting someone that needed fixed (sorta speak). Life has been much easier and fun not dealing with all the issues and crap. Now it's just finding the right one that doesn't need fixing and is ready to move on in life.
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1/15/2011 5:30:30 PM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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sherri_
Erlanger, KY
age: 49 online now!
|
The article is very interesting and some times true without someone realizing they're doing it. After a lot of soul searching I had realized that I kept attracting someone that needed fixed (sorta speak).
If you don't mind me saying so, that is because you emit a calming "vibe", for want of a better word. Those who are unanchored (or unhinged) seem drawn to it like a magnet.
In me, I call it my Kook Magnet . I'm betting you attract more than your fair share of kooks, too.
It would be nice if it came with an off switch, like an electromagnet has.
(shrug)
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1/15/2011 5:36:26 PM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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driver406
Saint Paul, MN
age: 58
|
I let the woman dump me. If she dumps me she can't go around telling everyone what an expletive deleted I am for breaking her heart and dumping her. After all, she dumped me. It ticks them off a lot more when they have to play the bad guy. And they can't get up on the cross and set up the loudspeakers blaring poor poor poor poor poor poor poor poor poor POOOOOOOOOR MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
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1/15/2011 5:37:25 PM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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driver406
Saint Paul, MN
age: 58
|
As far as partners go, I'm just looking for someone I think I could hit it off with. If she's receptive cool, if not I'll find something else to do. I'm not the kind to beat his head against the brick wall anymore.
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1/15/2011 5:38:05 PM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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jfc_onacross
Springville, UT
age: 37
|
I wouldn't even begin to understand why that of all the things you look for in a s/o would matter?
BTW: I missed you Cin
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1/15/2011 5:58:51 PM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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hotpink36
Springfield, OR
age: 38 online now!
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I have never thought about it..... I just want a good man who doesn't need fixed and doesn't have mommy issues
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1/15/2011 8:16:36 PM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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korndawg
Ponca City, OK
age: 37
|
Hmmm good question....Can't honestly answer that one
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1/15/2011 11:43:20 PM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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claudius5
Petaluma, CA
age: 61
|
Definitely wasn't on my list of things I thought about when seeking to date. The ones that were bitter or sounded bitter I stayed away from.
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1/16/2011 5:41:17 AM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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sassi_nepa
Factoryville, PA
age: 39
|
The article is very interesting and some times true without someone realizing they're doing it. After a lot of soul searching I had realized that I kept attracting someone that needed fixed (sorta speak). Life has been much easier and fun not dealing with all the issues and crap. Now it's just finding the right one that doesn't need fixing and is ready to move on in life.
I've had the same issue...kept getting myself into situations where I'd end up sucked into a relationship with fixer-uppers. So, does that mean because I broke it off with most of the men in my past that I am a dominant woman? Or just as semi screw-up who's trying to rectify her errors?
I like to think the latter....I had to get out of those situations for my safety and sanity, and those dudes weren't ABOUT to give up their sweet deal. Now I am just more careful in my choices.
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1/16/2011 5:48:02 AM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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milas2010
Philadelphia, PA
age: 29
|
That's an interesting insight. I never thought of it that way.
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1/16/2011 5:53:23 AM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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almostkinky
Alpharetta, GA
age: 58
|
http://bodyodd.msnbc.msn.com/_news/2011/01/12/5817763-guys-like-women-whove-been-dumped-study-suggests
I just read an article that basically said Men prefer women that have been dumped and women prefer men that do the breaking up. It had a couple of other interesting bits of information for a dating experiment they did on a "dating website". The link to the article is above.
I'm just curious if anyone has ever really put a thought into that while seeking dating partners?
You can read? Who knew? So, what you're saying is that men like to exploit vulnerable easy broads (go figure) and most women prefer dudes who at least one other loser bimbo though hot. Insightful! ! !
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1/16/2011 6:05:48 AM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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bingomama001
Lapeer, MI
age: 58
|
Never gave it a thought and doubt that I ever would.
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1/16/2011 6:30:35 AM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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alphabetsamson
Santa Ana, CA
age: 46
|
I never really thought about that.
But, I did think about twat.
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1/16/2011 12:01:48 PM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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nostringsjstfun
Grand Junction, CO
age: 41
|
If you don't mind me saying so, that is because you emit a calming "vibe", for want of a better word. Those who are unanchored (or unhinged) seem drawn to it like a magnet.
In me, I call it my Kook Magnet . I'm betting you attract more than your fair share of kooks, too.
It would be nice if it came with an off switch, like an electromagnet has.
(shrug)
If it was only that easy to have that switch to turn it off and on
@sassi_nepa The only error you try to rectify is the choice of being with that person that ends up making life a living hell. That's when the dominating side comes out to make that stand and that choice to end it.
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1/16/2011 12:25:36 PM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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rd_dude
Mesquite, TX
age: 54
|
been dumped by the best...
...and yet he just keeps going, like the energizer bunny
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1/16/2011 12:27:01 PM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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sherri_
Erlanger, KY
age: 49 online now!
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been dumped by the best...
...and yet he just keeps going, like the energizer bunny
I can't imagine a sane/sober/smart woman dumping you.
Therefore, she must not have been one or more.
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1/16/2011 12:35:51 PM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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rd_dude
Mesquite, TX
age: 54
|
thank you darlin...but, yes its true
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1/16/2011 1:00:37 PM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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allez1962
Saint Paul, MN
age: 48
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Without the complete statistic and reading the average age of 19,, I found it irrelevant.
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1/16/2011 1:02:56 PM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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justokingin2010
Billings, MT
age: 51
|
I have to say “I don’t think so”.
I can’t recall thinking about it back in the day, other than so-in-so is single again (town of about 400, any single girl got a lot of interest).
Now (in what I laughingly call my dating life), I don’t think the question has ever come up. An admittedly small sample though.
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1/16/2011 1:32:48 PM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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demetrios2
Cleves, OH
age: 54
|
http://bodyodd.msnbc.msn.com/_news/2011/01/12/5817763-guys-like-women-whove-been-dumped-study-suggests
I just read an article that basically said Men prefer women that have been dumped and women prefer men that do the breaking up. It had a couple of other interesting bits of information for a dating experiment they did on a "dating website". The link to the article is above.
I'm just curious if anyone has ever really put a thought into that while seeking dating partners?
Not one thought.
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1/16/2011 1:34:07 PM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
|
rd_dude
Mesquite, TX
age: 54
|
hey OP...we can play like you have been dumped and I dumped someone if you like
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1/16/2011 1:39:31 PM |
Has it ever mattered or even been pondered in your dating experience? |
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ldroftrollops
Goshen, INFagurhólsmýri
Iceland
age: 31
|
thank you darlin...but, yes its true
We can take her out..if it's needed. Cause we're sweet like that! And you know i'm in for that kinda game.
Nostrings,..I think that one is fairly common for many of it. I've been guilty of it a few times myself.
Kinky...it was a whole new world to me too,..I just learned men had minds and were capable of more than being sex objects...it's a whole new world.
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