3/19/2008 10:30:14 AM |
are women afriad of handicap men ? |
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wheelsincanada
Kitchener, ON
age: 45
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i have a question. are women afriad of dating or having sex with a handicap men. i`am handicap and i can do both. but i have been on many dating websites and women are even afriad to talk to me . much less go out on a date with me. i can`t walk but i have all the feelings and emotions of a normal man. sorry if i`am venting. but it really bug me that no women gives me the time and day. all i want is a good woman to spend my time with. this is what i feel like on this topic. like beating my head againest a brick wall.
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3/19/2008 11:10:50 AM |
are women afriad of handicap men ? |
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ladynwaiting_47
Philadelphia, PA
age: 47
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Probably, most people are afraid of what they don't know about. Most of the time our society doesn't teach people how to interact with people who are disabled in someway. It doesn't seem to be encouraged to openly talk about a person's handicap, so no questions are asked and that person stays an enigma and no comfort level is established.
A little girl in one of my son's class was in a wheelchair (loved that school because it had many different children with different abilities that were openly discussed). She got a new, improved chair in the middle of the year and she went to the front of the room to show all the new features. One of the features was that it would 'stand her up' (she had MS and other complications - but smart,beautiful, and delightful). They all oooohhhhed and aaaaawwwwwed at this bit of technology and a couple kids enthusiasticly shouted out they wished they could have a chair like that! Then she said quietly, "I wish I could run." The whole class understood exactly what she meant and they were in elementary school. They still exaulted in her newer mobility, she then raced eveyone on the playground because of the all-terrain wheels, but no-one wished to give up what they had to have what she did any longer.
I wish we all could have more experiences like this so we can have normal relationships with people from all walks of life and not fear the unknown, be allowed to be curious, ask questions, and learn about the person, not just see the outside frame.
I'm sure it takes much longer for you to get a person to just take the time to know you, much less trying to get them to think of you as a potential partner. I don't know if stating at first that you would just like to be friends would take some of the pressure off so a person could get to know you and then love you for who you are, not sure what the answer is especially on a site like this. Maybe you could post at the forums more just so people could see that you have the same thoughts and ideas as they do, encourage them to ask questions and answer honestly but with restraint. Sometimes you might feel like duhhhhhhhhh, or angry, but just remember they haven't had to deal with what you have and are not always aware of what they might sound like.
Good luck and have fun while you are looking.
[Edited 3/19/2008 11:29:46 AM]
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3/19/2008 11:22:07 AM |
are women afriad of handicap men ? |
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metu
Mansfield, TX
age: 46
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Hey Wheels!
Welcome to DH! We've had this discussion before in the threads & I myself have come to the conclusion that people do feel fear when confronted with the unknown. I can only speak for myself..........I've dated both a quad & parapalegic & other than the obvious "technical difficulties" ( disabled accessability in restaraunts, etc... ), I found no difference in the level of emotional & physical intimacy with a disabled man. Keep looking for that special love...........she is out there for you!
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3/19/2008 11:22:52 AM |
are women afriad of handicap men ? |
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wheelsincanada
Kitchener, ON
age: 45
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that reminds me of something that happen to me once. 2 boys in school asked me if they could ride my chair and i said sure if you can make me walk. that shut them right up . glad you share your story with me. i did have a g/f once , but after 4 years found out she was only after my money. now i`am looking for someone new who will take me as i am. i think most women think i can`t "perform" in bed.i hope they will learn that just because one part of your body doesn`t work that means all of you doesn`t work. it feels good to get this all out in the open and off my chest.
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3/19/2008 11:27:40 AM |
are women afriad of handicap men ? |
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wheelsincanada
Kitchener, ON
age: 45
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i`am glad you call me wheels . because that is what my name was when i first got on the internet. i hope your right about that special someone for me. everyone needs a little love . as the beatles say all you need is love . no i`am not a good singer
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3/19/2008 11:36:26 AM |
are women afriad of handicap men ? |
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ladynwaiting_47
Philadelphia, PA
age: 47
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Well Wheels,
I'm glad this is helping and you could relate to what I wrote. It is also letting people know about you.
May I ask about your disability, is it from an accident or is it generic. What kind of things do you like doing?
Good thing you got rid of the gold digger, hate people like that - selfish, selfish, selfish. I'd rather have a dog than that type of person, myself!
Thanks for writing about this.
Lady
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3/19/2008 11:47:10 AM |
are women afriad of handicap men ? |
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wheelsincanada
Kitchener, ON
age: 45
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i don`t mind telling people what my handicap is lady. i have celerebal palasy . it was from birth. but my parents didn`t know until a few months later. as for what i like. i like going to movies, shopping, dinning out (pizza is my favorite) , reading and just life in general . i have 1 cat who is spoil rotten lol. oh and watching sports. football being number 1. being in canada i can`t go out much in the winter time because of the snow. can`t wait for summer.
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