Let's start at the beginning, not the very beginning, but what sparked this epiphany at an obscene hour of the night. The long and the short of it is:

A while back, I got involved with a friend after some other traumatic things happened first.
We didn't want anything to come out of it.

He thought I was starting to get attached (which I wasn't).

It ended, badly, involving another girl and what I attribute to his use of the "little head" where the "big head" should've been used.

Since I'm the therapist who "has all of the answers" when my friends have a problem, when shit starts to hit the fan for me, I have only one friend capable to calmly, rationally, and intelligently help me sort it out (because when it is happening to me, I am too close to the issue to see all sides)... it is either pure coincidence or fate that he happens to profile people for a living. I have asked him to inconspicuously profile potential boyfriend choices for me on more than one occasion. Basically it comes down to, "Based on your professional opinion, am I going to get hurt?".

Ok enough background info. So he calls me out of the blue at an obscene hour of the night and wants to talk about what happened between my friend and I, except he already knew the details. He goes, "I know what your problem is! I've been around you enough good times and bad, and watched the type of men you generally go after". I listen intently thinking this psych profile of me was going to make me laugh... He said, "You like men who are what some would categorize as very good-looking (and they know it, too), who playfully harass you, debate with you, and create a harmonious balance between your personality Yin and Yang". Meaning the two extreme opposites in my personality swinging from dominant to submissive, playful and serious, etc. Where I would display one side, a man I would be compatible with would subconsciously display the opposite, and we'd be able to switch back-and-forth almost flawlessly.

My profiler friend said the only men who can do this completely naturally are BIG flirts and are not the kind of men who's wants/needs in or out of a relationship do not (so far, EVER) match up with mine. So how the hell do you change "Your Type" for the better?

I feel like I'm playing Double Dutch sometimes when it comes to dating...

Waiting your turn in line

Excited when it's finally your turn

The ropes start whipping around

You watch them and bob your head to the rhythm so you can judge when to jump in

Sometimes you catch yourself jumping to soon and have to step back

Sometimes the ropes whip faster than you can keep up

Sometimes they slow down and you jump too late/early

Either way it ends 1 of 2 ways: Getting whipped by the ropes, or jumping out before they can whip you first.

i hear evry1 telling dis girl "she's so young, she's so young", maybe getting serious is not about too young. if she wants it to happen now then let her have it now. Sometime the clock is ticking on love, some ppl have a schedule and sometimes that schedule works out. I am 25 and have yet to be in a serious relationship that lasted to a point when i can say "this is my husband" or 'im getting in engage soon" Still cant get over that. And i had a schedule. meet my "one" by age 22,23, serious for 3years, engages for 1, married by 27 and having my 1st child. Im 25 and single and am obviously no where near dat. I have my child, but no husband or at least long time boyfriend. i was recently with some1 that maybe i could have settled down but i guess i didnt stick wit it long enough. Now he got some girl pregnant not even 6 months after our break up and is forcing himself into marriage....if only time cud be turned back...