| 9/4/2008 7:35:40 PM |
Could You Tell If He Was Cheating? |
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musicandsmiles
Portland, OR
age: 53
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Here's the scenerio:
You've been seeing him for almost two years.
You have never been out on a "date", just drives and shopping in stores that are out of your area.
He calls regularly, but if the other line rings, he abruptly ends the call and says he will call back (maybe he does, maybe he doesn't).
A holiday is almost here, he announces he is going out of town on a trip to look at real estate (in some other part of the country). He assures you he is going alone.
He comes over to spend the night; Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday nights but not on weekends.
You don't hear from him from noon on Friday until late Sunday evening, when he wants to come over. Oh, and he always asks, what you've been up to. He's always been "just working around the house" or "keeping busy".
You have not been to his home in over a year, though he lives just 15 minutes from you.
You have never met any of his family or friends. (he tells you he doesn't have any, but heck, he is always "working with them" or dealing with them)
You really don't know how he makes his money, but he seems to always have some. But guess what, you always pick up the bill through the drive through window, gas, etc.
He's never even sent you flowers.
..... Gee, I think I need a drink .... this is really depressing ....
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| 9/4/2008 7:55:21 PM |
Could You Tell If He Was Cheating? |
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shanster86
Linton, IN
age: 22
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 That sure sounds highly suspicious to me. Kind of odd behaviour really. My vote would be yes. The things that really pop out to me are:
*the telephone calls you mentioned
*the holiday real estate run
*the excuse of "keeping busy and working around the house"
*not being to his house in over a year
That's just what really irks me, but all in all it sounds to me like the guy is cheating.
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| 9/4/2008 9:29:07 PM |
Could You Tell If He Was Cheating? |
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starrygrneyez
Steger, IL
age: 46
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Ummmmm don't think he's cheating.......he's MARRIED.
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| 9/5/2008 6:31:02 PM |
Could You Tell If He Was Cheating? |
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alicekathleen
Fresno, CA
age: 63
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Sound like no loss to you if this bird just disappears.... you deserve better!
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| 9/5/2008 7:39:36 PM |
Could You Tell If He Was Cheating? |
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musicandsmiles
Portland, OR
age: 53
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Wow, I am glad to hear that I am not the only one who feels this is not a normal relationship. Married? Well, could be still in his heart and mind, since he is in regular contact with his x wife. Cheating ... wouldn't be surprised. Using me ... gotta think so.
Dang, what's with men??? I think I just don't know how to pick them.
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| 9/6/2008 7:00:42 AM |
Could You Tell If He Was Cheating? |
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whynotgrl
Durham, NC
age: 51
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Sound like no loss to you if this bird just disappears.... you deserve better!
I agree this one sounds like bad news..deceitful and evasive. Dump Him.
You are worthy of so much more. Find the guy that brings you flowers!  
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| 9/7/2008 3:25:01 PM |
Could You Tell If He Was Cheating? |
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redjulie65
Beloit, WI
age: 42
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guess i watch to much life time
to me sounds like he's married or has someone else
i would say it's time to let him go
seems like no mater what he's bad news
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| 9/7/2008 7:04:41 PM |
Could You Tell If He Was Cheating? |
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deannalynnr
Sparrows Point, MD
age: 44
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Yep sounds like a married man to me too!
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| 9/7/2008 9:19:48 PM |
Could You Tell If He Was Cheating? |
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forestrose
Calgary, AB
age: 55
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Biggest flag to me is not going to his house. How does that even happen?
I know some will think this is unacceptable as a choice, but I personally will snoop if I have a damn good
reason to in my opinion, and suspicion of this calibre qualifies. I would borrow a gf's car & drive by his house during
times he is not available, and do you not have his house phone number? Oh, let me guess - he has no landline.
I think if you want to avoid this in the future, set some boundaries such as each pays their own way, and you only
spring once for any excuse like forgotten wallet, short on cash, whatever. Phone call limits are usually a flag
unless there is a very unusual situation, like is a psychiatrist who works out of home, but in that case, buy him a phone that includes a 'ringer off' button and takes messages.
What is it that lets you allow him to do this to you? Is he that great a guy? Is the sex great? Is he better than nothing? Be honest with yourself. wishing he was different won't make it so.
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| 9/8/2008 1:56:29 AM |
Could You Tell If He Was Cheating? |
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cece123
Warren, MI
age: 48
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Wishing he was different wont make it so......
That is so true........ My guy always takes Mondays and Fridays off... he says he has to take care of his other family... Though he says hes joking..., I think jokes are like a slip of the touge. I don't know what to think with him sometimes.
Actually... I stopped trying to figure him out a long time ago.
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| 9/11/2008 10:57:58 AM |
Could You Tell If He Was Cheating? |
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winesong
Bend, OR
age: 88
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never been out on a date???
Never spent Christmas or Thanksgiving days with him?
NO vacation to the beach, mountains, or spur of the moment,
3 day trips?
I think he does not have an x wife...(only in his presentation)
I think she is current wife, in # 1 position, and rules his clock hours,
and clueless.... how would you like to reverse places with her???
Time for a new cast of characters?
Winesong
[Edited 9/11/2008 10:59:26 AM]
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| 9/24/2008 8:14:18 PM |
Could You Tell If He Was Cheating? |
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luvamy
Monte Vista, CO
age: 30
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I knew he was a cheater when he started making comments like:
I never wanted to do any thing he likes to do.
How in the hell did he think we got together
if we didn't have any common interests
[Edited 9/24/2008 8:14:59 PM]
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| 9/24/2008 8:57:47 PM |
Could You Tell If He Was Cheating? |
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zooeygirl
Salt Lake City, UT
age: 50
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Well girl I have seen about every kind.. of relationship that is for sure... he's just using you for a booty call... there is no guessing about that at all... I have a book for you I will send to you for free,, I got it off the internet,, called : The Woman Men Adore and Never want to Leave... it is the biggest eye opener you have ever read about what guys think... and how they think.. how to get from a man the things you need and him feeling good about it and wanting to and cherishing you..so send me your email address and I will attach it.... THIS IS THE BEST BOOK YOU WILL EVER READ.. and will change what you put up with in Men... I would not ever be ok with that... and 2 years Girl ... I have been in bad relationships before and I know how you seem to justify things.. well he still comes around... he still calls... etc... you deserve more than that... and to waste time with a guy that treats you like that is not worth even wasting any sleep over.. get the book read it and you will know exactly how to handle that situation on your own.. and feel good about your choice.
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| 9/26/2008 9:50:53 PM |
Could You Tell If He Was Cheating? |
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musicandsmiles
Portland, OR
age: 53
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Zooeygirl .... thank you so very much! I am going to get the book tomorrow, for sure. This past week really was an eyeopener for me. Get this ... his Ex was supposed to be coming to visit him for two weeks, starting, Wednesday. Well, Sunday night I did not hear from him and finally he calls me Tuesday, while I am at work. Very sugary sweet, asking what I was doing, oh and his EX arrived early. I told him to spend the next two weeks with her, leave me alone and make up his mind. Yes, I do believe now that I am #2 at best and just a booty call. Makes me sick. I rent a nice home from him (he owns a lot of rentals in the area) and he finally, after 1 1/2 years, came over to fix the bathroom that didn't work. He called me to tell me the water would be off for the night. I said, Hell NO! I had a corporate meeting the next day and would now have to go to a motel room. He sarcastically said "thanks" for reminding him of his place, a land lord. I said "thanks" back for reminding me I'm just a renter and an occasional bedmate. I haven't talked to him since. Geez, where do these guys get off? (oh, I rented the house 4 months after we met, the relationship came first). I even sold my home to move over here ... another BIG mistake!
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| 9/27/2008 5:47:48 AM |
Could You Tell If He Was Cheating? |
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moonshadow59
Mahomet, IL
age: 49
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Music and Smiles,
I have seen this so many time. I work with landlords and tenents. I am not saying this is the case with him but I have had so many landlord have something going on with one or more tenents. And it is usually the married ones. One tenent called to complain because the landlords wife and daughter came over to the house while she was gone (of course they have keys) and distroyed her belongings.
You deserve better and I would get out of the lease ASAP if you can.
Good luck and hang tough. I know it hurts.
Zooeygirl I going to get on line and find that book. Thanks
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