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12/24/2008 8:02:13 PM How do you hide lonyness?  

brian1022
Merrimack, NH
age: 26


It's Christmas eve and many people I know are spending the night in with loved ones and it lets me think more. I have been single for a long time. I have not had the title in 4 years, and I was in a crappy relationship for the 2 years before that (already vowed never again for that). Let's not even talk about the sex thing either....

I think most people will agree that it's lonely spending this much time alone, but how does one hide it from women? I have met women in similar cases who just want any man and are desperate and I am not one of them, but I am at that stage where I wouldn't mind some company

12/27/2008 4:38:51 AM How do you hide lonyness?  
snappie1
Portsmouth, NH
age: 58


Hi Brian...your last sentence says it all....you are looking for some good company. Why does every relationship have to be of the romantic kind? Friends are always good to have...no matter what else. You sound as if you are the last person on earth without someone to share your life with. That's not true at all and if you keep feeling so sorry for yourself you just may make it true. Get out of the house and go make some "friends". If anything more should come of a friendship then consider it a good thing but quit with the pity party. Only you can make a difference in your life..so do it. The holidays are a hard time for many but we all survive and continue with what each new year holds. Don't let this new year coming find you without and friends. It's up to you....get off your duff...Brian....good luck...and take care.

12/30/2008 8:08:21 AM How do you hide lonyness?  

brian1022
Merrimack, NH
age: 26


You started off like you knew what you were going to say, but then you lost it. Do you really think I just sit around at home and hope for a bus of cheerleaders to break down outside? I'm out all the time. Anytime anybody I know has a party or anything I go to it and have as much fun as I can (sometimes parties can be a little lame). I just seem to find tons of women who are crazy, gold diggers, or jaded....or are you trying to tell me that it's just a factor of women today?
I lost my fiancee 4 years ago on Christmas, so it makes the holidays a little harder for me so sor-ry. I just got a little down for about 36 hours. If I could figure out to delete this then I would.

12/30/2008 8:03:13 PM How do you hide lonyness?  
snappie1
Portsmouth, NH
age: 58


Brian...gee...now you have lost me here. From the sounds of your first post I didn't think you had a friend in the world...I am glad to hear that you do. Hey..and I am sorry about your breakup 4 years ago. I don't think that I said anything about women being gold diggers as a normal thing in today's world. Where did that come from? You posted that you were lonely....you didn't go into any details and that's what I responded to. Didn't mean to offend you in any way...sorry if I did. Glad to hear that things are better now..and hope you have a great new year. Take care.

12/31/2008 5:00:02 AM How do you hide lonyness?  

montana59mc
Rochester, NH
age: 49


Brian i'm with ya, i just moved to NH from the south, i'm not yet used to the weather up here so i don't go out much, because of a fair sized inheritance i'm not working by choice and i hate the word shy but i guess it fits i'm a very soft spoken person, people on line say the same thing to me go out.......and i do yet it changes nothing, i just end up in a crowd of strangers........i'm not a bar person bars you just meet drunks, and then people tell me meet people at walmart or the grocery store???? this is my 2nd holiday season alone, but worst this year because i left all my friends behind in South Carolina, i have my adult kids here they are the reason i came here but they have their own lives..........so i'm dying to meet some people near me even if it's not for a relationship, but with the holidays seems even harder and seems like the you want to meet someone the more you seem desprite and less people want to meet you it's a weird catch 22.
sorry i'm no help but i feel your pain LOL.......another new years eve without a date.

1/1/2009 8:24:56 PM How do you hide lonyness?  

countrygal10
Laughlin, NV
age: 59


Hi Brian and Montana,

I've spent most of the last 13 years alone on holidays (even my birthdays), so I can sympathize with you. I also moved away from my friends and family, all my support system, hoping to start life over in a new area after divorce. Because I wasn't meeting anyone to date on my own I joined DateHookup this past year, but it seems they only want to email back and forth, not really meet me. Are you experiencing the same thing? Just having a friend to do things with would be welcome...like you said, Brian.

This Christmas, after 13 years solo, I saved my money and flew back to where I had been raised. My mother died a few years back and now my father spends all the holidays alone, so my returning was actually for both of us. During the 5 days there I saw most of my relatives and 2 old friends, it was wonderful! If it looks like another sad time ahead for you over any upcoming holidays, then think about returning to where you left previous friends or family. It will be worth the costs!

When I was married I took flying lessons and found oodles of easy-to-make friends because we had an interest in common. Maybe you two guys should think of fun things you'd like to do and just go do them by yourself...thus you don't look "desperate" should you come across a likely female!

Another idea...with the economy as it is, think about doing some type of volunteer work which utilizes skills you already have. Then, while you are feeling good doing something for others, your happier demeanor will shine through and you will be more attractive to women you meet. Worth a try!

And, as my mother had always said, go to church to meet someone nice. I have tried this one but my church is very small and there are no men age appropriate for me. Hate to think I must travel farther away to another church just to meet men...seems sacriledge (sp?).

Guys, I will not be returning to this thread...I got here by accident, then felt motivated to respond to you. I wish you both the best!

Countrygal10

1/1/2009 8:45:47 PM How do you hide lonyness?  

bigman76
Over 7,500 Posts!! (8,596)
Suncook, NH
age: 23


booze...lots and lots of booze



You wont ever be happy until you make a whole hearted effort to acheive it.

3/18/2009 7:06:23 AM How do you hide lonyness?  

gender_blender
Portsmouth, NH
age: 27


Stay happy. Do whatever it takes to make yourself happy. Go buy a 52" flatscreen tv or a new laptop computer or go somewhere distant for a weekend or go skydiving. Keep your mind off your loneliness and enjoy life.

3/18/2009 9:34:17 PM How do you hide lonyness?  

bigman76
Over 7,500 Posts!! (8,596)
Suncook, NH
age: 23


Quote from gender_blender:
Stay happy. Do whatever it takes to make yourself happy. Go buy a 52" flatscreen tv or a new laptop computer or go somewhere distant for a weekend or go skydiving. Keep your mind off your loneliness and enjoy life.


enjoy it by yourself

sorry, i had to

3/20/2009 11:06:38 PM How do you hide lonyness?  

clounder
Swanzey, NH
age: 23


i found that if all you do is thank aboute how lonyney you are and stay in youer bobule you will be depress so what i did was i got a 2ed job witch is one day a week you will have extra money to go out with frends and talk with pep
and dont let youer x see that you are hurt becouse it will hurt them more