| 12/26/2008 6:32:39 PM |
Let's Talk Money. And Values, Yours and Yours Alone! |
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alicekathleen
Sacramento, CA
age: 63
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Ok, we all grew up with certain values about money. For example, in my family, the rudest thing one could say was
"How much did that cost?" or to speak of money in any way. All families are different, and instill certain values.
We have talked on here about deal breakers, men who brag about money, men with not enough money, and
our own issues and problems (credit cards? ) dealing with it and without it. So give us your take on money.
This is a discussion, and not judging anyone whose values are not yours, ok?
Mine.... I am working class, no one in my family is rich, and no one is on the streets. So long as the man
makes about the same as me, so that we can travel a bit, get opera tickets, and we are not shaking out pockets
in search of our next meal, I am content. I have had a wealthy lover, and though I was impressed with
his address, degrees, vacation home, etc, that paled. I found that, for me, all that is nice, but not
necessary for my happiness. How about you?
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| 12/26/2008 7:07:56 PM |
Let's Talk Money. And Values, Yours and Yours Alone! |
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ryn514
Cobourg, ON
age: 48
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Aside from the wealthy lover (never had one of those!), I'm exactly the same as you, AliceKathleen. 
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| 12/26/2008 7:49:23 PM |
Let's Talk Money. And Values, Yours and Yours Alone! |
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lakc
Houston, TX
age: 48
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I don't want or need a man to take care of me....that being said, I don't want or need to take care of a man either!
Like you, AliceKathleen, I was raised by a working class father and (most likely) a stay-at-home mother. We were taught values and humbled now by what we have and how expensive thing are.
Those who say, "money can't buy happiness" are usually wealthy or at least "comfortable". They at least can keep the wolf away from the door or can pay "the credit card" bills.
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| 12/26/2008 8:41:53 PM |
Let's Talk Money. And Values, Yours and Yours Alone! |
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christy77
Hanover Park, IL
age: 32
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I was raised in a middle class family and loved it. I am not materialistic and will not tolerate that out of anyone
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| 12/26/2008 9:31:47 PM |
Let's Talk Money. And Values, Yours and Yours Alone! |
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beu24
Beverly Hills, CA
age: 50
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I grew up in a very large and poor family, 10 children 1 parent me being the only girl. In one of the roughest projects in Virginia. We lived foodstamps to foodstamps. I had to make my own clothes or wear my brothers clothes. I promise myself when I was younger that I wouldn't be anything like my mother. I refused to have alot of children with out being married.(I was married when I had both of my children with an education and almost 30) I refused not to know where my next meal was coming from and I refused to allow my children to grown up in povety. I have been truly been BLESSED in so many ways. All of my husbands have been wealthy (NFL player) to finanically secured (lawyer and astronaut)I learned young that education was very important and obtain my AS,BA,MBA. I ulitized my skills, education and wealth to become an entrepreneur. I see and saw so many woman depending soley on their husbands. I couldn't allow myself to do that.If I want to spend $1000.00 on a purse then I am going to do so without having to ask anyone may I. I am very materialist and I have every right because I earn my own. But with the same respect my man will have to be able to bring to the table what I bring or more. I am not looking to take care of a grown man and if he decides to leave I have mine and he has his. God has blessed me and I give all the praise and glory to him.
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| 12/29/2008 8:48:28 AM |
Let's Talk Money. And Values, Yours and Yours Alone! |
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txbirdlady
Liberty Hill, TX
age: 39
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When I was growing up, we were very poor. I remember eatting pancakes for breakfast and lunch every day during summer one year because we couldn't afford much else. I eventually got a really good job and what I thought was a really good husband. But it turned out once I got hurt and wasn't bringing home the bacon, the husband left. I think each side has it's pros and cons, but I definately think that if you aren't worried about where your next meal is coming from it does make life less stressful. The amount of money a man makes isn't my top priority, more of how he budgets it. I'm not looking for a guy who goes and spends $300 on a game system and then is counting change to get by until the next paycheck.
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| 12/29/2008 4:47:14 PM |
Let's Talk Money. And Values, Yours and Yours Alone! |
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tacataca
York, PA
age: 40
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"Those who say, "money can't buy happiness" are usually wealthy or at least "comfortable". They at least can keep the wolf away from the door or can pay "the credit card" bills."
Well let me say that I have worked for an EXTREMELY wealthy man for the past 14 years. And NO money CANNOT BUY HAPPINESS..Yes it can make you much more comfortable and secure..but it doesnt buy happiness.. it cannot save a wife who dies from cancer,or stop a family members addiction, or stop your own decent into dementia. Trust me .
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| 12/29/2008 6:17:12 PM |
Let's Talk Money. And Values, Yours and Yours Alone! |
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moonshadow59
Mahomet, IL
age: 49
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alicekathleen. My family was the same way you did not talk about how much money you had or how much something cost. That was considered very rude.
I came from a middle class family we were not rich but we had what we needed with some extras. My parents worked for everything they had and nothing was handed to them.
My ex's family it was all about money and they picked people according to how much money they felt that person had. The more money that person had the better the friends they were. This cost that much! Oh do you see what they have I bet they paid this much for it. And if they gave you a gift they had to tell you how much they paid for it. But the price always grew with each telling.
Used to drive me nuts!
I don't want to know what you paid for something. I am not going to go look up and figure out what you paid for something. If it makes you happy that is fine with me.
That money or talk of money does not make you a better person.
I would rather have someone who is rich in knowing who they are. Someone who knows how to treat other people. Some one who can enjoy the simple things and think that was the greatest time in the world. Value is put too much in materail things and I think that people forget about the value of caring, loving, and being there for each other. That to me is priceless!
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| 12/29/2008 10:42:46 PM |
Let's Talk Money. And Values, Yours and Yours Alone! |
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sensual_latin
Pleasanton, CA
age: 42
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As for me....I grew up both ways. 
When poor, we didn't even have money for groceries or to pay the rent and then grew up not so poor where we had a nany a chef a house keeper and drivers to drive us around.
To be honest, I've not given any thoughts about money when meeting a guy.
I don't feel that's an issue. A bigger issue in my opinion would be to find out if he's the ONE for me and me for him (soul-mates), once that's out of the way the rest is workable, is about compromising. We're both adults and would handle everything like 2 adults.
I was married for about 17 yrs and we never once had issues about (money) "what's mine is mine and what's yours is yours" attitude. I've always been against that type of attitude in a marriage relationship 
Some days he'd be un-employed, other days I'd be un-employed, other days we'd both be working for yrs but neither one of us ever complaint about our situations through the years.
Instead, we would always compromise and life went on. 
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| 1/6/2009 5:29:21 PM |
Let's Talk Money. And Values, Yours and Yours Alone! |
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jennyann68
Clarksville, AR
age: 65
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I no longer have the need to impress or be impressed but in my youth Money was the thing but in my old age it is values and manners, and most of all RESPECT
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| 1/7/2009 6:04:24 AM |
Let's Talk Money. And Values, Yours and Yours Alone! |
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mssojournldy
Indianapolis, IN
age: 68
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I, too, have had a wealthy lover and one wealthy man who wanted to be, but I was not attracted to him. I'm very independent, and I value that independence. I refused expensive gifts from either of them because I did not want to be obligated in any way.
The one I was in a relationship with for over 5 years, I didn't know he was wealthy when I was first attracted to him, so his money had nothing to do with my being with him.
However, I would not date a bum, knowingly. A man would need his own adequate income enough to be able to take me out occasionally, be independent himself and not expect any financial aid from me, 'cause it's not happening! I'm happy just being at home (mine or his)with that "special man", but I do like going out to entertainment venues occasionally, and he would have to be able to afford to pay. But beyond that, how much money he has is not my concern.
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| 1/11/2009 2:40:10 PM |
Let's Talk Money. And Values, Yours and Yours Alone! |
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doreen1111
Brenham, TX
age: 45
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I was raised in a upper middle class family. My dad owned a sheetrock company. Money can be an issue.  Most men want a woman they can take care of ... so he says ... whatever ... it's an issue ... and a very sensative subject!
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| 1/11/2009 3:56:02 PM |
Let's Talk Money. And Values, Yours and Yours Alone! |
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msrosebud01
Ware, MA
age: 44
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I grew up in a poor family,5 sisters and 3 brothers...I got the hand me down clothes from my sisters and my father worked at a shoe factory and when he got paid we went to the shoe store and got shoes...2 kids per week...at x-mas it wasn't much 2 presents each...my mom was a stay at home with us kids and always taught us the value of money and constantly said...MONEY DON'T GROW ON TREES and to be thankful for what we had...now I have been a single working mom since my daughter was 3,she is 21 now and we live together along with her fiance and 3 yr old son,economy too bad for them to live on their own...Money can't buy happiness just food,clothes and roof over your head...never take anything for granted,and always be thankful for what you have....
[Edited 1/11/2009 3:57:22 PM PST]
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