| 10/23/2007 5:36:41 AM |
Friends: Have them or Not? |
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butterfly58
Arcadia, MO
age: 60
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Now everybody I've been wondering about something that keeps popping its ugly head up and I need some answers here. For a long time on this site I never allowed anyone to be a friend in the "friends section" on my profile. I thought it was just for your "special" friend. Then I got a "special" friend and he in no way wanted to be just connected to me because he had other "special" friends and let's not get into what I told him!
Now I say what the Hell! If I like someone for any reason I add them. It does not mean I have a revolving bedroom door--it does not mean I'm into women although if that's your thing I'm ok with it, just not mine. It's "friends" people
It's been a turn-off for some men and I want to know why? Is it for the reason I stated or others-give me your opinion?
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| 10/23/2007 5:48:17 AM |
Friends: Have them or Not? |
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klassykitten
Toccoa, GA
age: 51
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My friends list is just that..friends....My reason is so I know who's online in the forums...I do refuse the ones that wink and then send friend request. So if my 30 something friends list disturbs somebody... I hate it. Not just anyone makes my list and the people on there are special to me....
What's disturbing to me is people I don't know and haven't even heard from and I am on their favorites list...hmmmmmmm
[Edited 10/23/2007 5:49:19 AM PST]
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| 10/23/2007 5:54:24 AM |
Friends: Have them or Not? |
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sadlyalone
Charlottesville, VA
age: 71
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I am relativly new to this site. If I see a lady who has been on this site, for a while, and there seems to be just more than a casual communication, and this person is in the friends list, I feel that there is competition already, and I don't have a chinaman's chance with them and conversly, if a lady adds a man to her friends list that I am interested in, I get jealous. This to me is more than "friends". I am on here to find a significant other. That is my hangup. I am jealous and I am threatened by competition(Oh! hell, I am insecure).   
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| 10/23/2007 6:00:50 AM |
Friends: Have them or Not? |
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butterfly58
Arcadia, MO
age: 60
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Now I do have to say that I have looked at guy's friend list and if he's an older guy and only has younger women then I'm assuming that's his thing. Most of the time my friends are my chatting buddies since I love to get into people's head.
Thanks for your imput there
[Edited 10/23/2007 9:19:37 AM PST]
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| 10/23/2007 6:10:53 AM |
Friends: Have them or Not? |
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butterfly58
Arcadia, MO
age: 60
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sadyalone: Wouldn't it be better if you asked the person about it? I saw this one guy had alot of women on his page and I did say--"looks like you're doing just fine without me" and he told me he never met any of them--they just wanted to be friends.
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| 10/23/2007 6:31:24 AM |
Friends: Have them or Not? |
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lawvixen
Oldsmar, FL
age: 53
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I think some of you are making too big of a deal out of the "Friends" section.
It is exactly what it states; A section to list your friends from this site, both male and female. That is why they also have a favorite section, for more personal use. If you get jealous over some pictures in a friend section, you have bigger issues than I would ever care to deal with......
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| 10/23/2007 6:57:24 AM |
Friends: Have them or Not? |
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suzydoll
Ravenna, TX
age: 63
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What a wonderful Topic. Thank you for posting it. I am fairly new here and still learning my way around so this was most helpful.
My few weeks of being here I have added about 8 people all men but one female. Out of the men added I am only corresponding with one. It has been my past experience on my myspace spot that many of my friends listed there asked to be added as a friend for the purpose of having access to the information that I post on bulletins, My Blog and my group. I also have a Blog here and I hope that people that share an interest in the things I post there will ask to be added as a friend.
I do not add or correspond with men who only send winks, do not have a picture and has no or very limited personal information posted in their Bio. The point of the site is to meet someone and get to know them. If they are in hiding from the beginning how can I know if I would be interested in them as a friend.
I did not join the site to win a personality contest but my intent was to meet compatible friends not only for dating but for visiting online as well and sharing interests. If, along the journey here of making new friends I run into someone that the friendship could evolve into something more, Ohhhh, Laaa, Laaa Baby!
May we all have a wonderful experience here and I sincerely hope that each of us will find exactly what we are seeking. 
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| 10/23/2007 7:07:10 AM |
Friends: Have them or Not? |
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sadlyalone
Charlottesville, VA
age: 71
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lawvixen:, Are you a shrink?, I can't spell psychoanalyst, but it seems to me that you are always putting people down and telling us we have problems. Well you are Damn right, I have plenty of problems, 1 in particular(no lady friend), why do you think I got on this web site anyway?.
This is getting nasty, I very seldom cuss.
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| 10/23/2007 7:19:15 AM |
Friends: Have them or Not? |
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lawvixen
Oldsmar, FL
age: 53
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I dont tell people they have problems, you told us you do Sadly...even in one thread you said you wished you were dead, so get a life buddy......
[Edited 10/23/2007 7:20:16 AM PST]
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| 10/23/2007 7:25:45 AM |
Friends: Have them or Not? |
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sadlyalone
Charlottesville, VA
age: 71
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Butterfly:, thank you for the input on asking the ladies about their friends, because I don't think I could stand the answer, if it was yes.
I think I hear the White Coat and Straight Jacket men at my door.
Did any ever think that, all of this might be captured by Big Brothers computer or, the thing I fear most, is that somebody will tell my daughters that I am on here, or Blackmail me.
ME  ME.
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| 10/23/2007 7:27:45 AM |
Friends: Have them or Not? |
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chucky_t
Akron, IN
age: 61 online now!
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A friends list is exactly that. Just a list of friends. Some people make it a point to have a large list or be on as many list as possible. If that make them feel better about themselves, I have no problem with that. I do notice a number of guys that try and get on as many list as possilbe. Women probably do the same thing but I do not check out as many men's profiles as I do women. If it work for them let them at it.
If you are intimidated by someone that has a friends list, then you do have problems. It does show you might have a problem with your self-confidence or you might be a way too controlling of a person. Not wanting your partner to have any friends and focus only on you is a red flag to most women. At least it should be.
Sad, with an attitude like that, you might be a long time without a lady friend. You may want to lighten up and try to be a little less sensitive to what people say and not take everything so personal.
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| 10/23/2007 7:28:46 AM |
Friends: Have them or Not? |
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butterfly58
Arcadia, MO
age: 60
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Play nice people
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| 10/23/2007 7:29:13 AM |
Friends: Have them or Not? |
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lawvixen
Oldsmar, FL
age: 53
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Sadly, you are certainly one bitter old fart, now I understand the reason for your nicname, your lack of photos, and negative posts in the forums...
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| 10/23/2007 7:31:33 AM |
Friends: Have them or Not? |
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lawvixen
Oldsmar, FL
age: 53
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Thank you Chucky....my point exactly.
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| 10/23/2007 7:32:12 AM |
Friends: Have them or Not? |
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klassykitten
Toccoa, GA
age: 51
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sad...you are 69??? and worried about what people think...and please don't take this the wrong way...jmho...but if you are as depressing in life as you come across in your post...then it's no wonder you are sad and lonely.
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