| 11/3/2010 5:58:40 PM |
Meeting people online? |
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donnanj
Brick, NJ
age: 52
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I have received many "winks" and messages from seemly nice guys in my area. How do you know they are who they say they are? It just is making me very nervous. Does this mean I am not ready to find someone else? I am not interested in getting married again for several reasons, however I do want someone in my life to share good times with. What has been your experience here or other places online?
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| 11/3/2010 6:09:21 PM |
Meeting people online? |
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xrobinettax
Owasso, OK
age: 46
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Funny thing about these types of 'forums' You see who Reads.. or not..
it can be rather humorous at times.
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| 11/3/2010 6:24:22 PM |
Meeting people online? |
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donnanj
Brick, NJ
age: 52
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Not sure what you mean.......
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| 11/3/2010 6:27:45 PM |
Meeting people online? |
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ron_kingroll
Placerville, CA
age: 61
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I told you you had a great smile. I would be shocked if you didn't attract lots of attention and flirts ect. As far as the type of men, I honestly have no idea. I read the "Men Only" forum here and there was the whole spectrum of replies under "What kind of women are here?".
My best quess is it's like a cross-section of the real world....lots of jerks, a few really nice guys that you are not attracted to(just how life is), and somewhere like a needle in a haystack one that is pretty decent but real hard to find. Hope I didn't offend anyone, just my opinion.
I'm sure someone else here will chime in and may have have a better idea. Good luck, and trust your instincts as far as being ready I guess.
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| 11/3/2010 6:31:33 PM |
Meeting people online? |
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donnanj
Brick, NJ
age: 52
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Thanks again  . I will take your advice and if a red flag pops up I will pay attention to it.
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| 11/3/2010 6:48:57 PM |
Meeting people online? |
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newdirection6
Wellsville, OH
age: 56
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I met several good men on here. Go out on a lunch date. Meet them there. Have fun you can meet a new friend.
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| 11/3/2010 7:01:56 PM |
Meeting people online? |
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donnanj
Brick, NJ
age: 52
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After being with the same person fr 25 years, is it normal to feel this nervous about meeting someone new?
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| 11/3/2010 7:12:24 PM |
Meeting people online? |
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xrobinettax
Owasso, OK
age: 46
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Not sure what you mean.......
For instance.. I have had one mail me... 'for a good time'
another that persists in mailing me to meet up ' and see what happens'
and my profile basically had 'F-off' written all over it...so to me its obvious that SOME have not read it. lol
and yes I think its normal.. I was married for 30 years. How the Hell does on even entertain the thought of getting to know someone THAT well again?
[Edited 11/3/2010 7:13:41 PM ]
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| 11/3/2010 9:59:37 PM |
Meeting people online? |
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donnanj
Brick, NJ
age: 52
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oh got ya. I had a few weirdos too come right out and ask for sex!
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| 11/3/2010 9:59:48 PM |
Meeting people online? |
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ron_kingroll
Placerville, CA
age: 61
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I was married for 30 years. How the Hell does one even entertain the thought of getting to know someone THAT well again?
We were married for 34 yrs. and I'm just realizing that's exactly what it is is "entertainig thought" to even think about starting a relationship again. More and more like an old romantic idea that still persists in my mind but really is a little unreallistic. Not that I don't hope someday I could be swept off my feet by somebody, but honestly, the math just doesn't work out very well at my age. I was ( probably may still be)as miserable and lonely as anybody but recently after being exposed to some of the crazyness some of my friends go thru with their relationships have started to really question if I ever want to put myself thru that again. Completely to my surprise I may actually be able to exist without filling the vacuum in my life with "desperate companionship". I should mention here this is only the second or third day of this, which may just be a temporary delusion. But honestly...
How the Hell does one even entertain the thought of getting to know someone THAT well again?
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| 11/3/2010 11:30:43 PM |
Meeting people online? |
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donnanj
Brick, NJ
age: 52
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but recently after being exposed to some of the crazyness some of my friends go thru with their relationships have started to really question if I ever want to put myself thru that again.
True story!
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| 11/4/2010 8:02:41 AM |
Meeting people online? |
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cherokeeloves
Stephens City, VA
age: 43
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I met 4 men from here. One was not as he claimed. Had he been honest I might have given him a chance. One could not deal with my disability who made me feel less of a person.
one was very nice but I moved so I am not sure if anything would had came from it. and one I am with somewhat now. He seems more to be a match. Even with our rough patches.
I would suggest going out for lunch. have fun make friends. I mean the more friends you have the less lonely you feel.
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| 11/4/2010 8:18:23 AM |
Meeting people online? |
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bikerman32
West Palm Beach, FL
age: 45
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i can only tell u to get to know them before you go out write them,talk to them on the phone. there are a lot of dirt bags out there if thay are truly inerrested thay can wait if not move on plenty of fish in the sea. my self i meet someone online and have known her for her for a long time. we are meeting next week and i truly hope it is the next chapter in my life.
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| 11/4/2010 10:40:22 AM |
Meeting people online? |
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peeps57
Sarasota, FL
age: 53
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Bikerman, I hope it works out for you. Best of luck. May you find happiness again.
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| 11/4/2010 3:07:55 PM |
Meeting people online? |
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donnanj
Brick, NJ
age: 52
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Thanks for all the advice. Bikerman I hope it works out for you!
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| 11/4/2010 9:59:56 PM |
Meeting people online? |
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fairweather1
Chicago, IL
age: 58
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Isolation is a bi-product of individualism. On line, we "meet" others in a disconnected way.
It is about ones self and not the other, I only hope this leads to self awareness, then
to a collective awareness. It did not rain men last night, nor did it rain women, you are the very sisters and brothers of a physical and social family. and in "relations" it is all
about the women, after all, women are the default gene.
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| 11/5/2010 10:38:44 AM |
Meeting people online? |
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hoophooks
East Ellijay, GA
age: 61
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Isolation is a bi-product of individualism. On line, we "meet" others in a disconnected way.
It is about ones self and not the other, I only hope this leads to self awareness, then
to a collective awareness. It did not rain men last night, nor did it rain women, you are the very sisters and brothers of a physical and social family. and in "relations" it is all
about the women, after all, women are the default gene.
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| 11/5/2010 3:37:59 PM |
Meeting people online? |
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peeps57
Sarasota, FL
age: 53
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Isolation is a bi-product of individualism. On line, we "meet" others in a disconnected way.
It is about ones self and not the other, I only hope this leads to self awareness, then
to a collective awareness. It did not rain men last night, nor did it rain women, you are the very sisters and brothers of a physical and social family. and in "relations" it is all
about the women, after all, women are the default gene.
I am so confused..What are you trying to say????
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| 11/5/2010 7:56:19 PM |
Meeting people online? |
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ron_kingroll
Placerville, CA
age: 61
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Isolation is a bi-product of individualism. On line, we "meet" others in a disconnected way.
It is about ones self and not the other, I only hope this leads to self awareness, then
to a collective awareness. It did not rain men last night, nor did it rain women, you are the very sisters and brothers of a physical and social family. and in "relations" it is all
about the women, after all, women are the default gene.
I suddenly feel so much better about myself. I thought I was really 'ed up. Now my individual awareness has merged with this sites collective awareness to come to the default conclusion of  HUH?
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| 11/5/2010 8:51:30 PM |
Meeting people online? |
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peeps57
Sarasota, FL
age: 53
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I suddenly feel so much better about myself. I thought I was really 'ed up. Now my individual awareness has merged with this sites collective awareness to come to the default conclusion of HUH?
I know!!
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| 11/6/2010 8:51:56 AM |
Meeting people online? |
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larryinobtsfl
Ormond Beach, FL
age: 59
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Hi everyone.
I'm accustomed to meeting people online and observing etiquette. This is not new to me. What is new is all the anger I sense from people who which to start a relationship. I find it preposterous.
I am a widower who has put the past behind and look forward to a new future. The past has left me with little to offer but myself. I have no children and no friends. I am truly starting over.
What I have to offer in a relationship is honesty and integrity. I am not boring. My work is demanding but I cannot afford not to work and finding a new job is next to impossible. With the free time I do have I hope to share with someone.
Is it too much to ask that exploring a relationship also include a search for common interests?
Your thoughts?
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| 11/6/2010 9:52:18 AM |
Meeting people online? |
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carsonguy1951
Carson City, NV
age: 59
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At an older age and in today's world, if one is not interested in bar flies, online seems to be the way to go....
There are a lot of great single people but unfortunately, a bunch of folks you have to avoid.
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| 11/6/2010 8:57:29 PM |
Meeting people online? |
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ssspecial
Claremont, NC
age: 70
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Hi ..I am new here and would like to ask anyone how to block someone from keeping on sending me very disturbing mail in my inbox. This person is very abusive, and insulting. I don't open the mail there anymore and would like to get this person stopped from sending mail to my inbox altogether. I have looked on each place and cannot find how to block anyone. There must be a way to rid myself of this person for good, please...any information would be greatly appreciated. Thanks and God bless you.... I would like to enjoy my inbox messages once again...
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| 11/6/2010 11:13:19 PM |
Meeting people online? |
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lovethelake17
Henderson, NV
age: 52
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Hi ..I am new here and would like to ask anyone how to block someone from keeping on sending me very disturbing mail in my inbox. This person is very abusive, and insulting. I don't open the mail there anymore and would like to get this person stopped from sending mail to my inbox altogether. I have looked on each place and cannot find how to block anyone. There must be a way to rid myself of this person for good, please...any information would be greatly appreciated. Thanks and God bless you.... I would like to enjoy my inbox messages once again...
At the bottom of the email there are options. You can report him, and I would, if I were you, then go into his profile and block him. He will no longer be able to see your profile, see anything you post, nor will he be able to send you email.
I'm sorry that happened to you.
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| 11/7/2010 7:14:25 PM |
Meeting people online? |
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ssspecial
Claremont, NC
age: 70
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Thank you so much Love.
I guess I didn't look down far enough to see it at the bottom. I did like you said and hope it will rid me of him. I have never been attacked like that before and it scared me. I didn't give him any reason to do that to me, except tell him I was a Christian and went to Church. He flamblasted me and called me numerous names, and e-mailed me several times with the same routine. I appreciate your help very much...........I came to this site because I too am a widow, and would like to meet or at least make friends here. I feel like you all understand the being alone thing. It gets even lonlier when you are retired. Doing things and going places by yourself is not fun, especially going out to eat somewhere. This world seems to be made for couples for sure. I never thought a lot about it till now that I am widowed....Thanks again and God bless...ssspecial 
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| 11/7/2010 7:49:51 PM |
Meeting people online? |
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lovethelake17
Henderson, NV
age: 52
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Unfortunately, it's not unusual for someone to blast you for not being who they want you to be, or saying what they want to hear.
A lot of women don't bother responding to emails from men they are not interested in for whatever reason--he's not Christian, or he lives too far, or whatever. Often, if you respond and politely tell them that, the men don't take that well and will be quite nasty in their reply.
It's sad, but it happens.
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| 11/8/2010 1:12:41 AM |
Meeting people online? |
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retrogirl68
Grant, MI
age: 42
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Because I don't socialize much, getting to know people through online dating made the most sense to me but I have learned a few hard lessons. Don't jump in too soon and try to have again what you once had to avoid dealing with your loss. I almost starting dating someone within a few months after my husband passed just to be happy again and not deal with the pain. Don't think you'll find someone a lot quicker this way because you won't. There are still a lot of jerks out there and with the internet it's so much easier for them to claim one thing and be another. I can't tell you the number of guys that claim they understand your situation and then when you're going through one of your down times they bail saying they don't want to deal with it. And most importantly, don't rule out meeting people the traditional way. I started a friendship with someone that lives in my area with no intention of dating him but a month ago he asked me if I'd like to try it and I agreed. At first it was so strange and had a hard time getting used to it. I felt like I was doing something wrong but fortunately the guy I'm dating is really understanding. I'll always know what it's like to be widowed because you never forget.
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| 11/8/2010 4:03:51 PM |
Meeting people online? |
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ssspecial
Claremont, NC
age: 70
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Hi again...........
I have been widowed for 6 1/2 years,and it is a little better now for me and I feel like joining the human race again. I can honestly say I know how everyone on here feels. My first husband died after we had been married for 36 years, and raised 2 children. A few years later I met a good man and I remarried, we seemed to go together like peas and carrots, and really enjoyed each other and loved the same things, we went everywhere together and planned to travel some. We were married for 6 years, then he passed away. I was so devastated and could not believe he too was gone. We piled a lot of happiness in those few short years, and I have a lot of good memories. 
It is amazing how the years fly by and you think.."has it been that long already." I guess we get tied up in our lives and are so used to trying to make it on our own, then we wake up one day and say to ourselves "I would really like to have someone in my life to share things with again."
At my age, it is a lot harder to meet people in our everyday lives around our small town. So I thought I would try this dating site. I have met a few nice gentleman on here and have met them in person and they are nothing like they said they were. I also have met a few that are looking for a bed buddy, but that is not what I am looking for, so I am still hoping that God will send me someone to fill the lonliness, and care for me for who I am, and I them.
I guess I have led a sheltered life, because the real world is harse and sometimes ugly. But I still look at life as good and the kindness we share with others surely will prevale. It is still a great life no matter what comes. I have enjoyed reading all that the people on here have to say. I pray that your time will come and I wish all of you the happiness you all deserve......ssspecial 
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| 11/8/2010 6:10:40 PM |
Meeting people online? |
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spoiledwidower
Hagerstown, MD
age: 55
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For instance.. I have had one mail me... 'for a good time'
another that persists in mailing me to meet up ' and see what happens'
and my profile basically had 'F-off' written all over it...so to me its obvious that SOME have not read it. lol
and yes I think its normal.. I was married for 30 years. How the Hell does on even entertain the thought of getting to know someone THAT well again?
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| 11/10/2010 3:08:31 AM |
Meeting people online? |
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the_butler
Tulsa, OK
age: 36
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I have received many "winks" and messages from seemly nice guys in my area. How do you know they are who they say they are? It just is making me very nervous. Does this mean I am not ready to find someone else? I am not interested in getting married again for several reasons, however I do want someone in my life to share good times with. What has been your experience here or other places online?
How do you know if the guy you meet at the supermarket is real? I mean yeah he's standing there, but you only know what he tells you, you might see through his crap, but most likely you won't.
So how do you know, you talk to them. It's simple, it's not complicated. Don't over analyze, don't over think, and don't play the standard games that everyone swears they hate to play but do anyway.
This is 2010, it's perfectly acceptable for a woman to message a guy first, call a guy, ask a guy out, and god forbid pay for a date.
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| 11/13/2010 9:18:17 AM |
Meeting people online? |
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equinefan
Gouldsboro, MEDurham
United Kingdom
age: 59
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I am mystified by online dating. I hear a lot about it, and even joined a site, that appealed to my passions in life. However, I rarely heard from anyone, and when I contacted someone, they rarely emailed back. I wasn't offended, hardly, I mean, at my age, and what I have been through in my life, but chalk it up to my age (late 50's), my status (widowed).
AND, also important is the distance. Unless someone lived in my backyard, they did not want to pursue it. I don't understand that mentality at all.
After 2+ yrs, I am beginning to think there is no one out there for me. My husband was my soul mate, and after 33 yrs together, I was so blessed. I figure, I had my time in the sun.
Getting use to the loneliness is still a challenge though.
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