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| 2/29/2008 2:46:22 AM |
Little Friday Humor |
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davids07
Princeton, LA
age: 51
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Good Morning Y'all here is some  and hopefully a  to get your Friday started right. Y'all take care and have a great weekend.
To Be 6 Again...
A man was sitting on the edge of the bed, observing his wife, looking
at herself in the mirror. Since her birthday was not far off he asked what
she'd like to have for her Birthday. 'I'd like to be six again', she replied,
still looking in the mirror.
On the morning of her Birthday, he arose early, made her a nice big
bowl of Lucky Charms, and then took her to Six Flags theme park. What a day!
He put her on every ride in the park; the Death Slide, the Wall of Fear,
the Screaming Monster Roller Coaster, everything there was.
Five hours later they staggered out of the theme park. Her head was
reeling and her stomach felt upside down.
He then took her to a McDonald's where he ordered her a Happy Meal
with extra fries and a chocolate shake. Then it was off to a movie, popcorn,
a soda pop, and her favorite candy, M&M's. What a fabulous adventure!
Finally she wobbled home with her husband and collapsed into bed exhausted.
He leaned over his wife with a big smile and lovingly asked, 'Well Dear,
what was it like being six again??'
Her eyes slowly opened and her expression suddenly changed. 'I meant
my dress size, you dumb ass!'
The moral of the story:
Even when a man is listening, he's gonna get it
Wrong when it comes to understanding a woman.
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| 2/29/2008 5:01:18 AM |
Little Friday Humor |
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sorprano
Wayne, NJ
age: 56
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that was a joke here not too long ago guy--lol...some people never read most of them--at least i do--but check back some ways back it was posted here---thank goodness there are new members all the time here 
[Edited 2/29/2008 5:02:38 AM]
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| 2/29/2008 5:05:18 AM |
Little Friday Humor |
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xxjayxx
Nixa, MO
age: 63
|
I stopped trying to understand women, I just nod my head now and then, smile and say yes dear often
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| 2/29/2008 5:09:10 AM |
Little Friday Humor |
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jhny_777
Rogers, AR
age: 56
|
yea jay think that understanding thing has
something to do w/divorce!Seems like i heard that
"well you just don't understand or what part of
____ don't you  understand?
-
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| 2/29/2008 5:35:33 AM |
Little Friday Humor |
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spiritwalker40
Boise, ID
age: 68
|
Back at ya
Subject: Respect
> >
> >
> >
> > An old prospector walks his tired old mule into a
> > western town one day. He'd been out in the desert for
> > about six months without a drop of whiskey.
> >
> > He walked up to the first saloon he came to and tied
> > his old mule to the hitch rail. As he stood there brushing
> > some of the dust from his face and clothes, a young
> > gunslinger walked out of the saloon with a gun in one hand
> > and a bottle of whiskey in the other.
> >
> > The young gunslinger looked at the old man and laughed, saying,
> > "Hey old man, have you ever danced?"
> >
> > The old man looked up at the gunslinger and said, "No,
> > I never did dance. I just never wanted to."
> >
> > A crowd had gathered by then and the gunslinger said,
> > "Well, you old fool, you're gonna' dance now," and
> > started shooting at the old man' s feet. The old prospector was
> > hopping a round and everybody was laughing.
> >
> > When the gunslinger fired his last bullet, he holstered his
> > gun and turned around to go back into the saloon.
> >
> > The old man reached up on the mule, drew his shotgun, and
> > pulled both hammers back making a double clicking sound. The
> > gunslinger heard the sound and everything got quiet. The crowd
> > watched as the gunslinger slowly turned around looking down both
> > barrels of the shotgun.
> >
> > The old man asked, "Did you ever French kiss a mule square in the
ass?"
> >
> > The gunslinger swallowed hard and said, "No. But I've always
wanted
to."
> >
> > The lessons from this story are:
> >
> > 1. Don't waste ammunition.
> >
> > 2. Don't mess with old guys.
> >
> >
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| 2/29/2008 6:19:39 AM |
Little Friday Humor |
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tn_tx_lady
Chattanooga, TN
age: 66
|
Guys, now understand is not a must. You know you love the excitement we put in your life.
None of the Ladies would answer the question of what I want in a man as understanding......We know the limits of what we can ask for. 
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| 2/29/2008 7:08:35 AM |
Little Friday Humor |
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sorprano
Wayne, NJ
age: 56
|
The Why ' s of Men
1. WHY DO MEN BECOME SMARTER DURING SEX?
(because they are plugged into a genius)
2. WHY DON ' T MEN BLINK DURING SEX?
(they don ' t have enough time)
3. WHY DOES IT TAKE 1 MILLION SPERM TO FERTILIZE ONE EGG?
(they don ' t stop to ask directions)
4. WHY DO MEN SNORE WHEN THEY LIE ON THEIR BACKS?
(because their balls fall over their butt-hole and they vapour lock)
(You ' re laughing, aren ' t you?!?!)
5. WHY WERE MEN GIVEN LARGER BRAINS THAN DOGS?
(so they won ' t hump women ' s legs at c*cktails parties)
6. WHY DID GOD MAKE MEN BEFORE WOMEN?
(you need a rough draft before you make a final copy)
7. HOW MANY MEN DOES IT TAKE TO PUT A TOILET SEAT DOWN?
(don ' t know....it never happened)
( C ' mon guys, we laugh at your blonde jokes!)
. WHY DID GOD PUT MEN ON EARTH?
(because a vibrator can ' t mow the lawn)
why is this only about men????
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| 2/29/2008 7:49:52 AM |
Little Friday Humor |
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londen
Ingersoll, ON
age: 58
|
David, I enjoyed the joke. I would love a birthday present like that - what an adventure, even though I do not like wild rides, I know I would enjoy this because someone I love thought it was what I wanted.
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| 2/29/2008 9:57:00 AM |
Little Friday Humor |
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sereneinlife2
Mountain View, MO
age: 57
|
david that was great, keep`em coming
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| 2/29/2008 10:06:00 AM |
Little Friday Humor |
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bluboy
Elsberry, MO
age: 57
|
Great Daivd !!!!!!
Thanks, Blu
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| 2/29/2008 2:47:59 PM |
Little Friday Humor |
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davids07
Princeton, LA
age: 51
|
Thank you Im glad y'all enjoyed it and thanks Spirit I enjoy yours also. I have some that are videos but being new Im still trying to figure how to do that part sorry. Well Y'all have a great weekend.
And remember"Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, a drink in one hand, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming "WOO HOO what a ride!"
Jane and Arlene are outside their nursing home, having a drinkand a smoke, when it starts to rain.
Jane pulls out a condom, cuts off the end, puts it over her cigarette, and continues smoking.
Arlene: What in the hell is that? Jane: A condom. This way my cigarette doesn't get wet. Arlene: Where did you get it? Jane: You can get them at any drugstore. The next day, Arlene hobbles herself into the local drugstore and announces to the pharmacist that she wants a box of condoms. The pharmacist, obviously embarrassed, looks at her kind of strangely (she is after all, over 80 years of age), but very delicately asks what brand of condom she prefers.
'Doesn't matter Sonny, as long as it fits on a Camel.' The pharmacist fainted.
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| 2/29/2008 3:16:50 PM |
Little Friday Humor |
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smalltownmouse
Saint Johnsville, NY
age: 59
|
David sooooooooo funny, Thank you, it sure lighten my day alittle.
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| 2/29/2008 3:22:49 PM |
Little Friday Humor |
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davids07
Princeton, LA
age: 51
|
Your very welcome Mouse Im glad to be able to bring you a Smile
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| 2/29/2008 5:38:55 PM |
Little Friday Humor |
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sunflower2u
Naples, FL
age: 64
|
Two old ladies were outside their nursing home, having a smoke when it
started to rain. One of the ladies pulled out a condom, cut off the
end, put it over her cigarette and continued smoking.
Lady 1: What's that?
Lady 2: A condom. This way my cigarette doesn't get wet.
Lady 1: Where did you get it?
Lady 2: You can get them at any drugstore.
The next day ... Lady 1 hobbles herself into the local drugstore and
announces to the pharmacist that she wants a box of condoms. The guy
looks at her kind of strangely (she is, after all, over 80 years of
age), but politely asks what brand she prefers.
Lady 1: It doesn't matter as long as it fits a Camel. 
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| 2/29/2008 5:48:48 PM |
Little Friday Humor |
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smalltownmouse
Saint Johnsville, NY
age: 59
|
  Thanks Spritwalker,sorprano and sunflower all of you have a way to make it more fun here,David you had a good idea, maybe there will be more from our friends out there.I never could tell a joke but enjoy them.
[Edited 2/29/2008 5:49:57 PM]
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