| 9/2/2008 7:15:46 PM |
why don't people want to use the phone to say hi instead of email |
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thebestman
Alpharetta, GA
age: 34 online now!
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Thebestman said it all. I feel the exact same way as he does. You don't know who you are talking to through email. God! You could be talking to a 16 year old kid. I get a kick out of these guys that ask you out through email "Hey do you want to meet for coffee?. You don't look at your messages for 2 days and the weekends gone by. Than when you give them your telephone number, they call when they know your at work or just never hear from them. These are adults? Let's stop playing games on this site. If your IM'ing someone and your hitting it off than move to the next step.
Exactly... This is also a good proactive step to eliminate the pretenders from the contenders. 
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| 9/2/2008 7:16:55 PM |
why don't people want to use the phone to say hi instead of email |
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jayceeangel
Newnan, GA
age: 40
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I *never* give my phone # out the first few emails. Just not going to happen. As a matter of a fact, I think it's creepy if after one "hi - nice profile" email, they ask for a number. Even when I was in my late teens/early twenties and doing the "out on the town" scene, I didn't give my phone # to the guys I met. I'd have them meet me there again the next night (or somewhere else), and THEN would decide to give my # or not. It was never just a "Hi - random compliment, can I have your phone number?", which is the equivalent of one email to me. Even then, I wasn't much of a "phone" person. It was more for planning to meet!
I don't know, but a phone number is kind of "personal" (for lack of better term) to me. It's not something I just hand out willy nilly. I'd much prefer to see if there is an interest sparked via email. If there is, make arrangements to meet in a public place and take it from there.
Sooo... I don't know if that answers your question or not, but that is why I don't do the phone thing early on. Even if I ended up meeting someone from here and giving out my number, we'd probably text more than chat anyhow 
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| 9/2/2008 7:21:45 PM |
why don't people want to use the phone to say hi instead of email |
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sharolas
Elk Grove Village, IL
age: 38 online now!
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I like to use both email and the phone
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| 9/2/2008 7:21:50 PM |
why don't people want to use the phone to say hi instead of email |
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prinyprin
Reading, PA
age: 20
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im a shy girl in person and on the phone so gettin on the phone and talkin to someone i just met is not on my list of things to do...i usually dont, i like gettin to know someone first, cause once someone has my number its harder to get rid of them if they turn out to be a total ass, i dont do all my dating online but i do like to meet people online when i can..
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| 9/2/2008 7:24:39 PM |
why don't people want to use the phone to say hi instead of email |
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clubkid66
Brooklyn, NY
age: 41
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Safety. It's easier to set up an email address than get a new phone number and only experts can trace an email to the person. Now if you want to date then sometime you want to talk and if the person is not willing after a period of communication between each other then move on.
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| 9/2/2008 7:29:08 PM |
why don't people want to use the phone to say hi instead of email |
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jennyk4
Russellville, TN
age: 36
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I agree.. safety first. you can track anyone with a phone number and 10 bucks... psycho serial killers DO exist
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| 9/2/2008 7:31:20 PM |
why don't people want to use the phone to say hi instead of email |
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kafe
Harrisburg, PA
age: 49
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I agree w/just about everyone here. By e-mailing you can 'screen' to find out if you think that you'd be interested enough to talk at some point. And personally, I feel that I can tell alot about a person by what they write and the way in which they word things.
Just FYI, I am definitely not an electronic maven, but someone I knew had a device for email only - that was about 5 years ago. I don't know what they're called and the cost, but I could find out if you would like. Or maybe someone on here knows what I'm referring to?
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| 9/2/2008 7:32:32 PM |
why don't people want to use the phone to say hi instead of email |
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thebestman
Alpharetta, GA
age: 34 online now!
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There are plenty of women who give guys in the public such as grocery stores, bars, bookstores, gas stations etc... their telephone number. They don't tell a guy, "Um I want to get to know ya first". There won't be a second opportunity.
If a woman is feeling the guy's conversation the minute or two he talks to her and she likes his looks, she will give him her number.
Again, the perfect example of how cyberspace has made some people get too caught up into the online world regarding the "so called safety". Again, a woman can call a guy and block out her number if she's so worried. I'm not suggesting calling a guy after the first chat. I've spoken to many women online rather quickly and they can attest that the bestman is far from being a lunatic or some mad man. It's just a phone call. lol And as stated previously, one can always block a number if said person is an A$$.
There's safety involved if ya meet a guy randomly in public also and he asks for the number in public etc.
There's safety involved if a woman breaks up with her boyfriend and he decides to stalk her. There's safety involved in other aspects of potential relationships, but that's another thread...
There is a risk in everything ya do in life.
[Edited 9/2/2008 7:39:04 PM]
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| 9/2/2008 7:37:28 PM |
why don't people want to use the phone to say hi instead of email |
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usakindatheart
Overton, TX
age: 48
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email
think before you write, erase if not what you meant to say
(can not do that on a phone call, first impressions you know?)
i have found that when you meet people, they put on a persona of what they think you want to see.
besides:
emails are great psychological tests...
i have been known to deliberate throw something out there, to see how they would respond...
and they do... on a more instinctive basic level.... truth shall set you free...
its not that i deliberately sabotage the potential relationship via email... but try to find out WHO this person really is, as far as i can through chat or email...
now if i ever find someone that i vibe with... i will set up a meeting. but as yet, have not found anyone close to where i live... has been a couple in other states.. but that again sets up how someone responds in an email,, doesn't it...
i think mostly, its just fun... and i like to do the forums...
some very intelligent people here on dh, have great insight of the human condition.
i think i have learned a little bit.
usa.
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| 9/2/2008 8:21:59 PM |
why don't people want to use the phone to say hi instead of email |
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powerfemme
Ansonia, CT
age: 42
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Phone:
It is far too easy to "imply" tone to text and in most cases people do that based not on what they are reading but how they are feeling at that particular time. and yes it is important to be safe and yes if someone wants to backtrack your phone number it would not be too hard to do... But then again you might be surprised at how easy it is to find people on the internet using nothing more than their email address or their nicknames.
Many psychological studies have proven that So called psychopaths are rather brilliant, having in many cases near mensa range IQ's.
Many liars can be considered to have a sort of psychosis. As good liars have been practicing their art "BS" all their lives one could call it a pathological or compulsive act. So being safe from players is up to you applying patience and not just using but trusting your instincts.
Bottom line, take whatever precautions you feel work for you ladies and gents, take a close look into that potential mates eyes and ask yourself "Do I see psychosis in those eyes?"
But for me, endless emails are a bore and really if you are going to meet up with someone it might be best to take a more laid back approach and enjoy the time spent meeting someone new (Friends first)rather than lamenting that person not being "The one"
And ladies... Don't bother trying a guy out for size, if he can't melt you at the knees like an ice cream cone in a heat wave with one kiss... it ain't worth feeding him ambrosia.
Peace
PF
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| 9/2/2008 8:31:42 PM |
why don't people want to use the phone to say hi instead of email |
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chellenc2008
Clayton, NC
age: 40
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Because it's safer to keep your phone number to yourself until you have a good feeling about the person at the other end of the communication. Have you read some of the posts on this site? Do you want those people drunk-dialing you at 4:00 AM?
 That's funny...I never thought of that
I don't like giving out my number right away and would prefer to just have theirs instead, at least at first. I have given it out and luckily he wasn't a psycho. Some ask for it right after saying hi - to me that's just too fast. I'd like at least a few emails exchanged, but don't expect anyone to wait forever either. *67 is good for anyone worried about it.
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| 9/2/2008 8:43:36 PM |
why don't people want to use the phone to say hi instead of email |
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data_chic
Abbeville, SC
age: 37
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Personally....I use smoke signals or morse code!!! Safer that way....
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| 9/2/2008 8:46:34 PM |
why don't people want to use the phone to say hi instead of email |
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darbie59
Whitby, ON
age: 48
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I find that this is a way for most to hide. Not sure if anyone else has noticed but the people that really wish you could meet them live forever away. Not saying it is always that way but most of the time. We are a people that have taught our children not to speak to strangers so when you do they become uncomfortable. People dont know how to talk person to person. We are becoming a bunch of reclusive faceless society. Scary as far as i am concerned.
Why not skip the phone to and actually meet. We use to do it that way for years worked well.
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| 9/2/2008 9:00:34 PM |
why don't people want to use the phone to say hi instead of email |
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energy22
Philadelphia, PA
age: 47 online now!
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because its too personal for them in email they can choose what theyre sayin and can choose what part of an email to adress its a lil different on the phone you cant DUCK certain stuff as people do in emails i see it all the time after emailing to a point i feel it should progress to the phone and if i give out my number if i dont get a call or if the other person doesnt give me their number in return so i can call or text them btw text messaging still is not the same its ok when you know the other person is workining but some will only text and not TALK clearly a sign of tooo afraid or not being adult enough to say i dont want to meet after a while i stop,it just says i really dont want you to know who iam seeeeeee ya! and not for nothing before i got on the computer ive talked to a few who would set up a meeting and always cancell so even if you get to the phone no quarentees the computer puts an extra step in the alredy looong process of even getting to the first date or meeting
[Edited 9/2/2008 9:07:28 PM]
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| 9/2/2008 9:07:08 PM |
why don't people want to use the phone to say hi instead of email |
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darbie59
Whitby, ON
age: 48
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because its too personal for them in email they can choose what theyre sayin and can choose what part of an email to adress its a lil different on the phone you cant DUCK certain stuff as people do in emails i see it all the time after emailing to a point i feel it should progress to the phone and if i give out my number if i dont get a call or if the other person doesnt give me their number in return so i can call or text them btw text messaging still is not the same its ok when you know the other person is workining but some will only text and not TALK clearly a sign of tooo afraid or not being adult enough to say i dont to meet after a while i stop,it just says i really dont want you to know who iam seeeeeee ya! and not for nothing before i got on the computer ive talked to a few who would set up a meeting and always cancell so even if you get to the phone no quarentees the computer puts an extra step in the alredy looong process of even getting to the first date or meeting
here here
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