| 10/16/2008 6:10:38 PM |
Why do men just seem to "magically disappear?" |
|
oshydi
Pensacola, FL
age: 57
|
Ok, I'm sure this topic has been brought up many times but I just had to bring it up again. It seems the last few times I was about to meet a guy after conversing for several weeks/months either by email or messenger, that he seems to just "magically disappear!". I was to meet this guy that I thought for once was going to be a nice guy and follow thru with meeting when for some reason or other our conversations online got shorter and shorter (meaning less and less talking)even tho whenever we did manage a conversation, he insisted that he was still wanting to meet me. Now all of sudden I am not even getting any emails nor is he answering my messages. We were to meet tomorrow (Friday) and I've not heard a word from him. As they say actions speak louder than words so I know the meeting is off. My first thought was he was lying about being divorced or he has another woman. He is from another dating site and I would think he wouldn't lie about being divoced. My problem is, why couldn't he just say he wasn't interested any more or just found someone else???? I hate "being left hanging" and not know what his reason is to just disappear!! And yes, I'm sure this has happened to you guys and I think it is just plain RUDE either way for them not at least saying its over!!! This just burns me up!!!  
|
| 10/16/2008 6:13:28 PM |
Why do men just seem to "magically disappear?" |
|
g_d77
Watertown, NY
age: 31
|
Why do women do the same thing? 
|
| 10/16/2008 6:17:21 PM |
Why do men just seem to "magically disappear?" |
|
lnlass
Laguna Niguel, CA
age: 51
|
Maybe married or has a girlfriend or is trolling around elsewhere and found someone more interesting. In any case, a pig. Be THANKFUL he disappeared. He could have actually perpetuated a ruse with you up close and personal so you have successfuuly thartwed him.
|
| 10/16/2008 6:29:01 PM |
Why do men just seem to "magically disappear?" |
|
oshydi
Pensacola, FL
age: 57
|
I know women do it to, but I'm more interested in why the "men" do it!! 
|
| 10/16/2008 6:37:12 PM |
Why do men just seem to "magically disappear?" |
|
kitty1553
Brattleboro, VT
age: 22
|
For me it seems that the biggest part of the "disappearing" act is fear. Some men feel more comfortable hiding behind a computer/phone..whatever..then facing people in reality. It's easy to be someone your not on the internet. You just have to weed out the good ons vs. the ...shy ones. So far I've found it's like a 25:1 ratio. For every 25 guys you "connect" with there's one that you will actually meet in person.
I hope this has helped.
|
| 10/16/2008 6:53:34 PM |
Why do men just seem to "magically disappear?" |
|
lobo_corazon
Kingston, ON
age: 39
|
Maybe he's still planning to show up tomorrow, and just got busy or doesn't think a confirmation is necessary?
In any case, important "internet dating" survival skill - Don't get attached to anyone before you meet them. Limit contact beforehand, and get face-to-face asap if he seems like me might be a match.
I know some people believe differently, that you should carry on by email and/or phone for a long time before arranging a meet, but I think you are just setting yourself up for disappointment after disappointment that way. Meet, and start getting all that stuff that's been left unsaid, on the table!
|
| 10/16/2008 7:05:09 PM |
Why do men just seem to "magically disappear?" |
|
kitise
Greenwood, SC
age: 30
|
many women have called men Dogs here. they are right, men just like dogs can smell trouble from a woman and stealthly escape. i like that.
|
| 10/16/2008 7:09:19 PM |
Why do men just seem to "magically disappear?" |
|
puffinpie
Highland Park, NJ
age: 45
|
To all of the men,
Please consider letting us women know if you change your mind about
dating us. We're mature & can take it. Please don't waste our
valuable time.
|
| 10/16/2008 7:12:42 PM |
Why do men just seem to "magically disappear?" |
|
oshydi
Pensacola, FL
age: 57
|
many women have called men Dogs here. they are right, men just like dogs can smell trouble from a woman and stealthly escape. i like that.
May be true, but I don't know what type of trouble he'd be "smelling" from me? I just wanted to meet him and see how things work out!! Not asking him to marry me!! LOL
|
| 10/16/2008 7:14:06 PM |
Why do men just seem to "magically disappear?" |
|
_ranger
Dublin
Ireland
age: 58
|
Hello oshydi,
I'm going to let you on to a secret I use to help me from future problems that you are experiencing.
I bought a webcam to talk to a woman from another dating site. She uses a webcam for her job presentations, and sales talks. I use a webcam to see what the person looks like in real time. Emails and phones are nice. However, a webcam adds a person touch when you are in a long distance relationship. I know there's pros and cons with webcams, so I won' go there. It you want to know more, you can email me and I help you get started.
Most men and women don't want to use webcams because they have something to hide, like girlfriends, wifes, husbands, boyfriends. To protect myself from getting too emotional involve with a woman I meet online, I talk to her for about a month, and if I'm serious about having a relationship with her, I make travel arrangements for us to meet.
Webcams don't lie!
|
| 10/16/2008 7:14:18 PM |
Why do men just seem to "magically disappear?" |
|
marieks85
Lincoln, NE
age: 23
|
Maybe he's still planning to show up tomorrow, and just got busy or doesn't think a confirmation is necessary?
In any case, important "internet dating" survival skill - Don't get attached to anyone before you meet them. Limit contact beforehand, and get face-to-face asap if he seems like me might be a match.
I know some people believe differently, that you should carry on by email and/or phone for a long time before arranging a meet, but I think you are just setting yourself up for disappointment after disappointment that way. Meet, and start getting all that stuff that's been left unsaid, on the table!
I agree that something might have just come up thats been keeping him busy. But even if he does flake out its better that he does it now instead of right before you go to see him and he just doesnt show.
as far as meeting someone in person really fast and then getting to know them, that hasn't really worked out too well for me so im a little biased when I say that you should talk first and then meet after you've gotten to know eachother. People say a lot of things on their profile that are vague and i'd much rather find out before I meet him whether hes a full blown alcoholic or just an occasional drinker 
|
| 10/16/2008 7:17:32 PM |
Why do men just seem to "magically disappear?" |
|
wileyguy
Wilkes Barre, PA
age: 37 online now!
|
For me it seems that the biggest part of the "disappearing" act is fear. Some men feel more comfortable hiding behind a computer/phone..whatever..then facing people in reality. It's easy to be someone your not on the internet. You just have to weed out the good ons vs. the ...shy ones. So far I've found it's like a 25:1 ratio. For every 25 guys you "connect" with there's one that you will actually meet in person.
I hope this has helped.
you've connected with 25 guys?
|
| 10/16/2008 8:36:07 PM |
Why do men just seem to "magically disappear?" |
|
hunter12gauge
Bellaire, OH
age: 46
|
I know women do it to, but I'm more interested in why the "men" do it!!
|
| 10/16/2008 8:38:19 PM |
Why do men just seem to "magically disappear?" |
|
znorth
Rockford, MI
age: 36
|
Whatever are you talking ab... >POOF< 
|
| 10/16/2008 8:48:04 PM |
Why do men just seem to "magically disappear?" |
|
southernpride2
Grantsburg, WI
age: 37
|
Maybe he just lost interest or the connection during your time and didnt know how or was to scared to tell you afraid you would go ballistic or something..jmo
|