did you get to say goodbye 16

10/28/2008 1:24:57 PM	did you get to say goodbye
wolfstar7 Apollo, PA age: 49	No, My husband was in the hosp. he had a form of muscular dystrophy. He got pneumonia was in the hosp. for 2 months. Mark was 45. Our youngest son just got home from his second tour in Iraq. The Dr. had him in a med. coma cuz, his lungs was so bad. They brought him out of the coma, he was doing real good. My sons & me spend thanksgiving at the hosp. On Mon. morning I got a call from the hosp. telling me his heart stop,( they don.t know how long). He was brain dead. So I didn't get to say goodbye. We had live support taken off on Dec. 2, 05. He passed away at 9:53pm that nite. It's been almost 3 years now, it's still hard. I miss him so much.
10/28/2008 3:07:48 PM	did you get to say goodbye
queenbee2000 Kingsport, TN age: 58	Yes, I did! I had went to work that morning, he walked me to the car, then off I went, 20 minutes later they called said to go to hospital he was having a stroke. So, I went there, they were just bringing him in out of the ambulance and I was right there. He was talking to me and after we got into the ER room he was surrounded by a dozen people. He told one of the nurses to tell me to bring him some sex. But she misunderstood -he said SOX. We all laughed- he was always making me laugh! then they took him for a CT scan and he had a massive heart attack on that table. He was on Coumaden the blood thinner and had just went to the VA hospital a few days before and they INCREASED it! He died from a brain hemmorage then the heart attack. After the heart attack he was put on a ventilator (which he told me many times never let them do that), he never woke up and after all his brothers and sisters got there we decided that he would never want to live like that plus the doctors said there was no brain activity, we chose to un hook the ventilator ,10 minutes later he just went to sleep with Jesus. very peaceful. God was so gracious to him and us. He was a Great husband, loved to cook, always giving of himself to others, he was a First Responder, State Park Ranger, taught 4-H Shooter sports, taught Muzzle loading, wonderful step father and Papaw to his two grandsons. I could go on and on. It is so hard for me to write this even after two years. I spent 25 of the most memorable years of my life with him...things will never be the same they said and how true that is. Thanks for letting me share.
10/28/2008 3:57:51 PM	did you get to say goodbye
fairiebue Minneapolis, MN age: 50	No
10/28/2008 4:33:59 PM	did you get to say goodbye
8isagoodnumber Pascagoula, MS age: 49	No, we were both in surgery from injuries we sustained in a car accident. I found out later that night after I came out of recovery, that he had died. No I didn't get to tell him goodbye.
10/29/2008 5:39:24 PM	did you get to say goodbye
laceylady146 Lanoka Harbor, NJ age: 58	Yes I was fortunate enough to get to say goodbye. I had been taking him for chemo and radiation for almost a year 200 mile round trip. The last time when he went for chemo they said he need 20 days of more radiation and he said to me that he couldn't take it anymore and it wasn't fair to me to be making that drive every day. We did stay in a hotel every week when he had treatment...but I guess it was too much for him and he wanted to give up. He told me that he had left me the house, cars & some money and he wanted me to find another person to get married again. I cried and thought that it was horrible because he was the only man I wanted....but he knew his time had come and he told me how I made such a good wife and took wonderful care of him. He was a good cook and always did all the cooking until he became ill....he was also a picky person when it came to food and wanted it just so. The biggest compliment he gave me was that I had become a good little cook (after all I learned from the best...HIM). He is gone 5 years. May you rest in peace my dear husband! [Edited 10/29/2008 5:40:04 PM PST]
10/29/2008 8:30:24 PM	did you get to say goodbye
thymetravel Moncks Corner, SC age: 49	I lost my husband in 1991.. He was 33 years old. We were both volunteers for the local fire departments and rescue squad, search and rescue divers... we had a call on an overdue boat , it was storming.... we went to the airport, got in our helicopter... and attempted to take off...we got several hundred feet in the air... due to a rotor head structural fracture in the rotor... we came out of the sky.. our helicopter exploded.. I survived, my husband was 100% body burn... i held him until he passed.... he couldnt speak because of the burns.. I couldnt speak because of the shock.. But during our life and sharing together, never a day went by that I didnt tell Richard that I Loved Him.. and meant it. I never had any guilt that ..."Maybe I should have said this...or Maybe I should have said that".... Because I told him...everyday, what he meant to me.. Like others, He and I were the best of friends... and yes, honestly, we never argued in the 113 years that we had shared in marriage, and the couple that we shared before, as childhood first sweethearts... We had a deep and abiding Love between us. No doubt, No guilt, No need for Im sorry... or I wish I had..... I wish I did..... I said Goodbye... while he laid in my arms... My children were not able to say goodbye to thier father. The burns would have forever scared and left the same memories that I have today...Even though , today my children at ages, 32 and 28, wish they could have said goodbye and seen them.. I didnt permit them to see him at the ages of 13 and 9 at the time of his death. I felt it was too young for them to se him, and truly I couldnt have an open casket in any way. Yey....they wanted to say goodbye... In saying and blabbering all of this... When we have a Loved One, whether its a husband, a Child, Mother or Father... or even a friend.. Its how we treat them at all times... to treat them as we would like to be treated... to Love, as we would like to be and desire to be loved... If we do this daily.. then any sorries, or guilt, or internal pain... we wont have... Only the grief of thier loss is left..and isnt that enough to ponder on. Love them, today as if you wont have them tomorrow. It will be the difference of sanity and insanity. I also lost my daughter at age nine to Hurricane Hugo in 1989 and my husband in 1991.. two, back to back.. Easy?.. No.. Still hurt?... Yes... Does it get any easier?... Yes... after many years, it ets easier... but never goes away But I dont want it to go away.. I will forever Have them on my mind, yet forever in my heart. I wish the same for You.... Its a "KINSHIP" we all share here on this thread.. When we loose the very ones that we love. or know..maybe it is just a friend.. but its all the same.. A Loss of One that we care for. I also beleive... that If just If....you didnt get to say GoodBye at the time.. Then now's a good time to say Good Bye.. Why?.. Because they are always with us.. as Spiritual Guides on this side. I beleive that. I wish you all Gods Speed... and truly wish you all the best in your ventures and endeavors while we all remain here on Earth..only to look forward to a Time.. we shall meet once Again.. What a reunion that will be. Hmmmm... just a thought, a ponder....... Hugs to All.
10/29/2008 10:45:12 PM	did you get to say goodbye
laceylady146 Lanoka Harbor, NJ age: 58	Quote from thymetravel: When we have a Loved One, whether its a husband, a Child, Mother or Father... or even a friend.. Its how we treat them at all times... to treat them as we would like to be treated... to Love, as we would like to be and desire to be loved... If we do this daily.. then any sorries, or guilt, or internal pain... we wont have... Only the grief of thier loss is left..and isnt that enough to ponder on. Love them, today as if you wont have them tomorrow. It will be the difference of sanity and insanity. WELL SAID....ALSO LOST MY MOTHER YEAR BEFORE MY HUSBAND....IT WAS VERY HARD! SORRY ABOUT YOU LOSS OF YOU CHILD & HUSBAND! BE WELL AND KEEP THE FAITH..... [Edited 10/29/2008 10:48:10 PM PST]
10/29/2008 11:05:48 PM	did you get to say goodbye
tina56 Anoka, MN age: 53	i did and so did his daughters. He was in the Hospice in north Memorial and I asked them to take him off all the drugs and they reluctantly did but right before he passed he opened his eyes and looked at all 4 of us. 3 daughters and me. He knew he wasn't alone. He died with his eyes open looking at us. I closed them. Tina
10/30/2008 3:40:38 AM	did you get to say goodbye
queenbee2000 Kingsport, TN age: 58	laceylady...your spouse sounds alot like mine, particular about his cooking...said many times he taught me how to cook!!! I admit he was the best in everything. Thymetravel: you also said what I was thinking, it is time to move on,they are our spiritual advisors thanks to all of you ! Have a blessed day!
10/31/2008 10:04:24 AM	did you get to say goodbye
azureeyes08 Duxbury, MA age: 44	I cared for her and nursed her at home for 2.5 years before she passed.
11/1/2008 5:26:48 AM	did you get to say goodbye
jkt1967 Dallas, TX age: 42	My husband died almost 4 years ago. I still miss him very much. He died late at night on the 1 janurary in 2005. i did get to say goodbye, and I was there win he died. I still miss him very much, but it's a whole lot better than what it used to be. he was sick for two years before he died. and i was there with him.
11/1/2008 2:58:06 PM	did you get to say goodbye
judy1958 Conyers, GA age: 51	he was rushed to the ER around midnight and the doctors said they had to sedate him to try and get his vitals under control so i said ok and he never came out of it and we had to decide to unhook him from the machines..i said my goodbyes and i'm sorrys but he was in a coma and never knew it..if only i could go back to that night and say what i should have said while he was still alive and awake..we did get to say i love you 1 more time before that so i'm grateful for that..
11/1/2008 7:11:26 PM	did you get to say goodbye
ageless4ever Connersville, IN age: 51	Yes I did but she never woke up,she died of brain cancer after surviving lung cancer and removal of her right lung, chemo just wiped her out and for 2 years my life was home,work and the hospital or nursing home. finally brought her home on hospice and lost her 10 days later. She is no longer in pain so the good lord has one hell of a woman up in heaven and I ask him always to watch over my baby. you really learn what love is when it taken away from you, she will always be with me. it has been 3 months and it gets O.K. her family has been great to me and am grateful. Tell every one you love just what they mean to you, always say I LOVE YOU.
11/2/2008 12:39:11 AM	did you get to say goodbye
kaltesherz Tulsa, OK age: 34	Yes and no. It took her 8 hours to die, and in that time all she wanted to do was talk about how things are going to change, what I needed to know about this or that and she kept repeating "Don't let people use you." Then she ordered me home and kicked me out of the room. I remember the time I walked out, and on her death certificate she had only passed on probably 10 minutes after I left the room.
11/2/2008 2:30:36 PM	did you get to say goodbye
santadave Boise, ID age: 67	I'm not sure.She was in and out of coma and a preacher and I were praying, She woke up I said "I love you" and her response was uninteligable, But the smile was not. Dave

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