| 10/27/2008 3:43:01 AM |
Am I being shallow or just normal ? |
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actual_druid27
Natrona Heights, PA
age: 30
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I am a normal type of guy. I am about 6'5 tall and about 325 lbs. I am basicly a hopeless romantic but there is one issue that I face often. I am constantly attracting the attention of extremely large women. I dont mind someone who is overwieght but when I see someone who gets interested in me as being almost morbidly obese then I feel somewhat bad about it when they tell me that they like me and want to "get to know me better". I appologize if this is offencive to anyone and I do not mean to be that way at all. I am simply saying that I guess I am too nice of a guy or something because I am nice and respectable to everyone and it often leads to someone falling for me that I am not attracted to in the least. Forgive me but I grew up with a mother who was very big in weight. And all of my childhood, I lived in a house that was unclean, with clutter and trash laying everywhere. Basicly unsanitary conditions. And now I associate someone who is extremely overwieght with dirtiness and filth. I do understand that not everyone is like that. And that there are all types of people who are like that, big or small in size. So I am not being single minded in the least. But I cannot get over the issue of what I am attracted to and what I am not. But when someone shows me interest and I am not able to return that, I feel guilty and somewhat obligated. Is this completely wrong of me? And is there anything I could do differently about this issue?
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| 10/27/2008 5:19:35 AM |
Am I being shallow or just normal ? |
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tryagaindj68
Evansville, IN
age: 42
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Wonderful people come in all shapes and sizes. Open your mind, and expand your options. Or not.
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| 10/27/2008 6:05:25 AM |
Am I being shallow or just normal ? |
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jamso
La Marque, TX
age: 56
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Have dated women of all different weights. One at least might be called obese. If you've never dated a large women then ya I say it's shallow yet you are intitled to date whom you please.
I'm only going to date someone who is close + or - average built. Thats just where I am right now. If thats shallow then so be it.
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| 10/27/2008 6:15:10 AM |
Am I being shallow or just normal ? |
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seakats
Palm City, FL
age: 48
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my most important requirement is that someone be easy going like myself. When I finally put that in my profile, that is who responded to me. It is simple; whatever is important to you, don't be afraid to say it.. You save you and your dates alot of wasted time.
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| 10/27/2008 6:16:32 AM |
Am I being shallow or just normal ? |
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bren31mn
Rochester, MN
age: 42
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I don't think your being shallow, everyone has their own preferences. In my case, I don't like dating people with rotten teeth/bad teeth. That's my preference. I don't date people that are full of themselves or prejudice, again that's my preference. I usually like my men a little bigger, but it would not stop me from dating a smaller man, however... I would not date someone who weighed 400 lbs. but I have close friends that are that big. Everyone has reasons for why they don't date a "certain type" and yours were stated. No one else has to agree or understand them, it's your feelings and yours alone to deal with it. No one can help what their attracted to and what their not attracted to.
As for me, my weight has always been all over the scale, I have been big, I have been little... but I don't worry about it, someone either likes me for who I am or they don't. Shallow? no, not for the reasons you've given... normal? who knows what normal is anymore lol
 
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| 10/27/2008 6:21:09 AM |
Am I being shallow or just normal ? |
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wisegirl33
Queensland
Australia
age: 46
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Bren - That is a great posting ! Totally agree.
wisegirl33 - 27 Oct 08 at 1125pm Aest
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| 10/27/2008 6:51:09 AM |
Am I being shallow or just normal ? |
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foxy_woman_49
Omaha, NE
age: 52
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Your preferences is your right 
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| 10/27/2008 6:53:47 AM |
Am I being shallow or just normal ? |
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gapeach7777
Ball Ground, GA
age: 38
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You are normal don't worry. Everyone has their preferences.
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| 10/27/2008 9:37:43 AM |
Am I being shallow or just normal ? |
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jan_uk
Merseyside
United Kingdom
age: 32
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no point in pretending. we are who we are!
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| 10/27/2008 9:43:10 AM |
Am I being shallow or just normal ? |
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lilmissala
Hartselle, AL
age: 53
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I am a large woman. I know most men are not attracted to me although I am neat and clean and my house is too. My weight problem is thyroid disease,medications and not being able to exercise like I use to due to my health. You would be shocked at how little I eat. You have your own ideals of what attracts you though. I don't hold it against a man for not being attracted to me. Sometimes I wish they could be though LOL. I am not going to date someone that has bad hygiene habits. I have actually met some nice looking probably very good men over the years but their hygiene habits were a total turn off. I do not in any way feel guilty for this. I do not feel obligated to them in any way. I too am nice and respectful and friendly to people...it does not make me "owe" them my affection.
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| 10/27/2008 10:10:20 AM |
Am I being shallow or just normal ? |
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suzicutzi
Philadelphia, PA
age: 43
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If you certain preferences thats fine but don't lead other people on because you feel you are "too nice" to be honest with them.
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| 10/27/2008 10:18:11 AM |
Am I being shallow or just normal ? |
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patrick143
Warrenton, VA
age: 47
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There is nothing wrong with having expectations and desires for your perspective mate.
when a woman contacts you that you are not interested in, you are NOT obligated to contact them in return. If you do spend time talking with them it is your obligation to not lead them on. You need to politely let them know up front that you are not interested in an intimate relationship. Do not let your guilt of possibly hurting their feelings lead them on, that is what will hurt their feelings.
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| 10/27/2008 10:25:08 AM |
Am I being shallow or just normal ? |
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th6231
Point Pleasant Beach, NJ
age: 63
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You aren't any different than anybody else--you have an idea of what you like and what you will tolerate and that's that!! 
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| 10/27/2008 10:53:55 AM |
Am I being shallow or just normal ? |
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irish_lassie
Mullica Hill, NJ
age: 40
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There is nothing wrong with having expectations and desires for your perspective mate.
when a woman contacts you that you are not interested in, you are NOT obligated to contact them in return. If you do spend time talking with them it is your obligation to not lead them on. You need to politely let them know up front that you are not interested in an intimate relationship. Do not let your guilt of possibly hurting their feelings lead them on, that is what will hurt their feelings.
Well said
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| 10/27/2008 12:51:26 PM |
Am I being shallow or just normal ? |
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elainak
Chattanooga, TN
age: 28
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Everyone is attracted to their own type of person, both physically and mentally. I think it is normal to try and be nice to everyone, of coure, but its also important to be up front and honest to avoid leading someone on. If someone contacts you that you are not attracted to, it's your right to tell them that you are indeed not interested. If they get offended by your honesty that's their problem.
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| 10/27/2008 12:53:23 PM |
Am I being shallow or just normal ? |
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evileddy
Ottawa, ON
age: 37
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There is nothing wrong with having expectations and desires for your perspective mate.
when a woman contacts you that you are not interested in, you are NOT obligated to contact them in return. If you do spend time talking with them it is your obligation to not lead them on. You need to politely let them know up front that you are not interested in an intimate relationship. Do not let your guilt of possibly hurting their feelings lead them on, that is what will hurt their feelings.
Huh? So every woman that talks to me I have to say "sorry.. I won't have sex with you"
interesting angle.. I'll try this out tomorrow.
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| 10/27/2008 1:23:40 PM |
Am I being shallow or just normal ? |
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jcrupper05
Norfolk, VA
age: 25
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Huh? So every woman that talks to me I have to say "sorry.. I won't have sex with you"
interesting angle.. I'll try this out tomorrow.
 Too funny Eddy, let me know how it works out!
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| 10/30/2008 1:43:45 AM |
Am I being shallow or just normal ? |
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ladyvizion
Hayward, CA
age: 32
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Hmm...sounds familiar..but in my case the guys i dated had major self-esteem issues. I once had a guy that broke-up with me becuase he felt that I was gonna leave him eventually!! Now how bizarre is that!! Talk about your all time dumb reasons to dump a person. But back to you... First, you must look inside yourself and imagine what your dream lady would look like, act, feel, dress..etc..whatever tickles your fancy! Then ask yourself, "is this what you truly desire or is it more of what you think you should desire"? When its all said and done. Be true to yourself..remember you are a person too!! and your feelings should always take presidence when it comes to matters of your heart!! In the end you are saving yourself as well as them future heartache, dispair, resentment, deception and grief... verses short term rejection.
So, no... I do not think your shallow at all...
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| 10/30/2008 2:10:32 AM |
Am I being shallow or just normal ? |
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irishmark909
Highland, CA
age: 45
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It's your life, do not settle or feel guilty for something that you have no control over. Being next to a big man helps them to feel more secure. That's perfectly normal. You feel guilty because you had to here it growing up . How cruel some people are, and yes they are. I also had very large people in my family growing up. They are Deceased due to their bad health. So your compassionate, add that to your profile as that is a great trait as you know, and if I can suggest; Being 6"5" and a large man , I noticed that many asian women like big white guy's. May I suggest mail order brides from South East Asia, they will treasure the ground that you walk on. Go to webcamintroductions and pic one . Tell skip MArk said hi.
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| 11/5/2008 7:18:17 PM |
Am I being shallow or just normal ? |
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mike22304
Alexandria, VA
age: 46
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You are normal.
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| 11/5/2008 7:22:59 PM |
Am I being shallow or just normal ? |
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fairiebue
Minneapolis, MN
age: 52
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You are who you are, and you like what you like.
not shallow just normal
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