1/3/2009 9:08:35 AM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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fote
Syracuse, NY
age: 58
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I think that most are now unionized doormen at hotels.
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1/3/2009 9:12:08 AM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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barbaraajo
Reston, VA
age: 53
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They are all over the place!
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1/3/2009 11:06:06 AM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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exsquid48
Enid, OK
age: 50
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The funny thing is we are every where. Most of the time I do all the little things like that for a lady. I get all sorts of funny looks though. I still keep doing these things.
Next time someone opens a door, holds an elevator,or offers to help in some way, do not think there is some other motive. Some of us were raised this way, and refuse to change.
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1/3/2009 11:48:17 AM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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toosweets
Tahlequah, OK
age: 46
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.........
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1/3/2009 12:29:47 PM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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followurdreams2
Ridgeland, MS
age: 40
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There are actually quite a few men still out that are willing to do this but the majority of women are too independent to be "taken care of" as you put it. Men, I think, are too confused by modern women to know whether or not to be a gentleman.
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1/3/2009 3:13:24 PM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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ponyboy2009
Dade City, FL
age: 42
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It depends on the situation. In some cities and societies it is insulting to the woman. If you are walking into a store and you open the door as a courtesy for others, then its ok. If you are on a date, and you hold the door open for her, make sure you slightly touch her on the middle of her back to give her a sense of security. Allow her to extend her hand first, offer to open the door first(then take the door from her and allow her to enter first, let her sit down first and order first. Let her take the lead, and she will be more appreciative. Some men expect women to do everything and are afraid to be too much in control. If you just let the woman lead and you follow and do what is natural, you will be fine.
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1/4/2009 11:37:11 AM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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doreen1111
Brenham, TX
age: 45 online now!
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I like gentlemen and I expect to be treated like a lady. Sometimes you have to show them ... stand at the door and wait, he'll get the hint .... and you didn't have to say a word. However, I don't want one to "take care of me". (here's issues for you) I can take care of myself. I'm so glad that I persued my career instead of being the "stay at home mom" with the 2.5 kids, a minivan and an SUV. Not that there's anything wrong with it ... but I have too many friends who did it, and when the relationship failed. They're screwed trying to figure out how to make a living and raise kids on their own. I have one friend that had to work 3 waitress jobs and her kids were alone so much they got into tons of trouble. I guess I want a mutual partner ... Signed Miss Independent!
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1/4/2009 11:48:32 AM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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valgirl731
Altoona, PA
age: 43
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There are lots of guys out there that do open doors. When they do it just shows that they are gentlemen and if they do or don't have respect for you. A guy being a gentlemen will always score points with me on a date.
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1/4/2009 11:48:55 AM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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lainey285
Belington, WV
age: 44
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I have a man that does that all the time. It proves chivalry isn't dead. I can't get use to it but I am trying hard. I love it. Makes me feel so special.
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1/4/2009 4:27:37 PM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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stringsvrs
Syracuse, NY
age: 52
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They tend to fall in love with pricks.
That's why every man has one
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1/4/2009 5:06:59 PM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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ladyvirtue123
Magalia, CA
age: 53
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The chivalrous gentleman are the only type I date...haven't had a problem finding gentlemen...
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1/4/2009 5:26:45 PM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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cajunmister
Kinder, LA
age: 59
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They been bread out of existance...
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1/4/2009 5:27:43 PM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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saml
Waterford, ME
age: 25
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They been bread out of existance...
I strongly disagree.
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1/4/2009 6:15:08 PM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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sinfulcharming
Fort Wayne, IN
age: 42
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Chivalry has indeed seemed to become irrelevant today and that is a tragic loss for both men and women. Women refuse to hold men to the standards necessary to achieve the genteel honor that they have lost. Women are disrespected in today’s society, because they ask for nothing more. There is probably not a woman alive who, in some part of her heart, would not want to be carried off on horseback by a knight in shining armor, but they don't admit that anymore. They are taught to declare ourselves equal to men in all respects and in no need of superior treatment. If only women would realize that chivalry was a way of showing respect and devotion, not condescension, do they have any hope of ever regaining this lost system of virtue.
Some believe that in the battle of the sexes chivalry is an attempt to solidify the place of the “weaker sex.” In my opinion, such actions are worthy and go to show that we should expect this kind of respect in our relationships.
While trying to be fiercely equal, it seems men and women have created a problem: when is chivalry polite, and when is it male dominance? I fear that girls who are starkly aware of this may just be labeled “The Intimidator” for coming off as anti-chivalry. Many guys have experienced this conflict: open the door and you’re a gem — or open the door and you’ll offend. Who knows what’s appropriate anymore?
The guessing game of chivalry comes down to a matter of choice, with one person then trying to figure out what the other has decided. These days guys feel it necessary to ask, “Do you mind if I open the door for you?” while it used to simply be expected of them.
This conflict is born of our ultra-sensitivity to women’s and equality issues, and while I’m glad we are aware of those issues, I don’t believe they should mean the downfall of respectable chivalry. In other words, it is possible to support all-around equality without sacrificing kind treatment.
and oh ... for me Chivalry is very much alive
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1/5/2009 5:25:54 AM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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doriflubber
Jamestown, NY
age: 40
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I enjoy a man opening a door for me. And I have been teaching my young gentlemen to open doors for ladies (people in general) since they were very young.
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1/5/2009 5:34:52 AM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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silkpanties53
Baytown, TX
age: 54
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Whatever happened to men treating women with respect? I know I can open my own door but I like having them opened for me. Am I too old fashion? I love being "taken care of". Am I alone?
No your not alone I feel the same as you.
but some still believe in the old ways.
just take your time you will find one that fits your needs.
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1/5/2009 6:48:49 AM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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wolfi
Albuquerque, NM
age: 44
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I enjoy a man opening a door for me. And I have been teaching my young gentlemen to open doors for ladies (people in general) since they were very young.
If those 'young gentlemen' are your sons, you better stop that shit.
Unless you want them to NEVER be able to find a girl they actually want.
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1/5/2009 9:14:41 AM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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toosweets
Tahlequah, OK
age: 46
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If those 'young gentlemen' are your sons, you better stop that shit.
Unless you want them to NEVER be able to find a girl they actually want.
....this guy is always Mr. Negative, really eaten up with the "nice" thing, reminds me of Oscar the grouch on Sesame Street......doesn't want anyone to be "nice"........
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1/5/2009 9:20:35 AM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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b1hunid
Yukon, OK
age: 33
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why are women too lazy to open the damn door themselves?
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1/5/2009 1:10:44 PM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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khrystaleroxx
Haltom City, TX
age: 39
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I don't want a man to open the door for me unless my hands are full.
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1/5/2009 1:11:52 PM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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b1hunid
Yukon, OK
age: 33
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if your hands are full, you need to put something down
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1/5/2009 1:14:19 PM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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evileddy
Ottawa, ON
age: 36
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Those men were told that women are independent now and stopped doing it.
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1/5/2009 1:52:41 PM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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boskveld
Kissimmee, FL
age: 56
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I do it. It's probably old school but it's how I was raised. Some younger women seem to feel a bit awkward about it, but others have wondered why their peers don't do it. It's just a courtesy after all.
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1/5/2009 2:02:37 PM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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lillibet
New South Wales
Australia
age: 52
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Well in this day and age of swinging doors and revolving doors I guess they just got knocked out of the way...Not to mention escaltor doors ouch maybe their fingers got jammed....
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1/5/2009 6:37:12 PM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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kawarider
Porterville, CA
age: 47
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What happened to them? I think at some point parents stopped teaching their sons and daughters that there are some things that constitute good manners regardless of whether everyone appreciates them or not.
I open doors, hold chairs and the like for women. I stand when they leave or return to a room or table. I'm from the south and it is how I was raised.
The objections I've read here are the same ones I've seen elsewhere. If I open a door for a lady and she objects, I simply look her directly and pleasantly in the eye for a half-second or so, nod, say "of course" and then proceed through myself. After all, one of the rules of politeness is to not do things that other people consider rude. That doesn't mean I stop opening doors though. I can either wait for a signal that someone thinks not opening them is rude or wait for a signal that a lady objects. I've chosen the latter.
Perspective is important in this. Some people argue that a man opening a door for a woman is a sign of weakness on either his part or hers. Nonsense. My wife runs her own business with offices on both coasts and multiple states in between. Later this year, she will have expanded even more. Clearly, she is a strong woman. Let's look at the other side: Most people who see our almost 25 year-old marriage usually remark upon the fact that it looks "1950-ish" or "Victorian" because she defers to me (and no one else).
It's not about what you get from being polite (other than the knowledge you've acted appropriately). It's not about what other people think or do. It's simply about having good manners.
My apologies, I do tend to get spun up about this. Too many years as "an officer and a gentleman" I suppose.
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1/5/2009 6:45:40 PM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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tichobar
Bonita Springs, FL
age: 51
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Whatever happened to men treating women with respect? I know I can open my own door but I like having them opened for me. Am I too old fashion? I love being "taken care of". Am I alone?
I open doors for women or at least hold it open for whoever is behind me...
BUT, I have never seen a women hold a door open as she goes through - they never even look to see if soomeone is behind them. They just let the door go in your face.
Women are too spoiled and entitled - I think I'll stop holding doors open, these rude b*tches can open their own doors.
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1/5/2009 7:11:51 PM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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next2u2
Mount Airy, NC
age: 62
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We're still here. while you are waiting and looking for us,we also would really like to meet you. It's kinda sad that that dimension of romance is fleeting . Those of us who cling to it and apply it when you give us the oppurtunity consider it a blessing to know that you are not one of "them" yet and that we stumbled across you . Our numbers are so small that the likelyhood of matching the age,gender,profile,goals and the rest of the mix,just makes it a shot in the dark that we meet. Then again,once you "advertise" that you prefer a gentleman like that,then you have all of us telling you,here I am,just to get close to you. So you have to constantly calibrate your "bullshit" detector. we are of thier gender,but not of thier style,I hope you make a good choice,fondly,Tom
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1/5/2009 7:23:51 PM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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flossymae86
Lincolnton, NC
age: 23
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they became extinct... like dinosaurs
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1/5/2009 7:29:46 PM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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maxium4x4
Findlay, OH
age: 52
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I do it all the time and half of the women give me a funny look.
Same thought here I was raised to open the door for a women even if they don't appreciate it
[Edited 1/5/2009 7:38:29 PM PST]
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1/5/2009 7:51:58 PM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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jajasun
Denton, TX
age: 43
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Most men down here do it so much it pisses some women off !
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1/5/2009 7:55:12 PM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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barbaraajo
Reston, VA
age: 53
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I am raising BOTH of my sons to open doors for ladies, they are being raised to be gentlemen
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1/6/2009 12:02:06 AM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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ladyvirtue123
Magalia, CA
age: 53
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why are women too lazy to open the damn door themselves?
Hmmm, not sure if you are just joking around here, or you're just another inconsiderate male that doesn't know how to treat a real lady...were you an orphan? Parents never taught you how to be gentleman?...
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1/6/2009 12:05:15 AM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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tazz963
Rome, GA
age: 46
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We got them all here in Georgia LOL
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1/6/2009 12:08:54 AM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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9thstwonder
North Beach, MD
age: 51
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I always open a door for a lady?
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1/6/2009 10:12:44 AM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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xbadboy
Tampa, FL
age: 38
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Here I am... Here I am....
I would smilingly and happily open doors and all that lovelyness if given the oppertunity but my financial poorness has made me not so interestinheehemost:
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1/6/2009 12:44:12 PM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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countrysweet677
Waverly, NY
age: 49
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their just all married..
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1/6/2009 12:45:31 PM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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bucktail
Poynette, WI
age: 48
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not all of them
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1/6/2009 12:51:40 PM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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windwhispers
Enumclaw, WA
age: 40
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their just all married..
looking in the wrong places you ladies our
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1/6/2009 12:54:53 PM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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countrysweet677
Waverly, NY
age: 49
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ok i correct myself, my ex was a good one for opening doors for me and little old ladies...there are alot of men that still have manners and know how to use them...that an attractive trait.
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1/6/2009 12:57:02 PM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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flakey1023
Islamorada, FL
age: 63
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They are hanging out with the guys who are waiting for the woman to put the seat UP when they are done "quid pro quo"
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1/6/2009 1:17:28 PM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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countrycharmer
Litchfield, OH
age: 44
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Whatever happened to men treating women with respect? I know I can open my own door but I like having them opened for me. Am I too old fashion? I love being "taken care of". Am I alone?
I still open doors.....
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1/6/2009 2:35:14 PM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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grace_ful_heart
College Station, TX
age: 40
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all the men i have dated open the door for me.. yes, i do notice and it's wonderful!
they are out there, you just have to be more selective to whom you go out withjmo
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1/6/2009 3:31:33 PM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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john1115
Hartsville, TN
age: 48
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they became extinct... like dinosaurs
Not all of them.
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1/7/2009 6:42:53 AM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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23hiaf
Williams, IN
age: 50
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Guys, FYI.....If you don't open doors for me & treat me like a lady, the only date you get is the first & last.
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1/7/2009 6:47:14 AM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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theothergman
Michigan, ND
age: 48
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I strive to be a gentleman in all that I do. It's just me, but it's a small way I can show any and all women that I respect them.
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1/7/2009 8:57:12 AM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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wolfi
Albuquerque, NM
age: 44
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I'll open the door for little kids, obviously handicapped folks and (if applicable) animals.
If you are neither of the above, you better hope that thing's on air shocks.
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1/7/2009 8:50:43 PM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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usakindatheart
Overton, TX
age: 48
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What ever happened to men that open doors for women?
they now live in nursing homes and the doors are automatic
I'll open the door for little kids, obviously handicapped folks and (if applicable) animals.
If you are neither of the above, you better hope that thing's on air shocks.
wow wolf... your on a role again aren't you...
I think that went out with womens lib?
NOT!!!!!!!!!!! seriously, men open the door for me every day...
of course i live in texas, and most men here learned that from their
very instructive mothers... bless them.
[Edited 1/7/2009 8:55:03 PM PST]
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1/8/2009 5:25:56 AM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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barbaraajo
Reston, VA
age: 53
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They are all over the place!!!!
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1/8/2009 1:54:37 PM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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clearrivers
Parker, CO
age: 42
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I haven't met any men yet that have not opened doors.
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1/9/2009 1:12:36 PM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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pteyes
South Hadley, MA
age: 46
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Men opening doors? Heck, what ever happened to "honest", respectful men???
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1/10/2009 11:20:00 AM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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foxy_woman_49
Omaha, NE
age: 51
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The man I go with does open doors when need be.. he does carry the groceries in for me he does take out the trash
He is a gentleman and knows how to treat a woman
He knows his family comes first
He provides for his family
He takes pride in what he does
He's not about being mean and rude
He's kind and considerate
He's not over barring and doesnt hang on me like a kid does
He is wonderful and he is mine (well when I have a man in my life)
He'll help and do all this without it being a problem cause he was raised that way and because he loves me
there are so many more ways that I have not listed..
Love them old fashion values
I appreciate him as he does appreciate me
[Edited 1/10/2009 11:24:37 AM PST]
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1/10/2009 11:25:30 AM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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waytogo51
Farmington, AR
age: 53
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I always open the door. My girlfriend was not used to having that done for her. But she's getting used to it now.
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1/10/2009 1:00:50 PM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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postalbob
Everett, WA
age: 24
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Ok...
Holding the door open for a woman...Here's my outlook on it...
Men that do it for every woman are acting in a fashion to women that have not earned it and are actually allowing and encouraging a huge surplus of women that take advantage of men.
It's actually a form of weakness...A random man should not be holding doors for random women for many reasons.
More elaboration:
I agree this is something that should be one of those special things a man does. I agree entirely. So why do something special, treating a women like she's special, and lead her own accordingly before you feel anything special for the girl? Why do something for her you do for every other girl? It ruins it entirely. There is no sentiment for something you do for every woman. It seems a little bit like an a**hole thing to do to me. Until your relationship has passed into being serious enough that she's not just another one of many women you've dated in the past, it shouldn't be done. I've noticed the guys that do this stuff do the same sentimental stuff for every woman they are with. It's no coincidence that these women weren't really special after all and are no longer in their lives. You should be honored to be the one woman a guy does it for and not demand it of all men. That is downright silly.
Some things are special and deserve to be saved for a special person.
I will hold a door open for a girl a care about. I won't do it for random women because it enforces me as a crutch (meaning the girls out there that don't deserve it will continue to believe they can get things for being a woman and not acting like one).
That is usually why men don't do it.
Oh yes and to do with another thing...
I do believe in equality when it comes to treatment, you give and take...So to the women that will reply to this stating "well, you should do it for any woman because a lady deserves to be treated like that, not just the woman you love" Well...Then I as a good man deserve something from all random women showing how great of a man I am. I won't receive it, so I won't give it. It's called "fairness". Perhaps the women stating this should learn it.
[Edited 1/10/2009 1:05:03 PM PST]
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1/10/2009 1:04:14 PM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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missamber66
Suffield, CT
age: 19
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I feel as if chivalry is a lost cause. There are so many times i have carried bags and bags of stuff looking like a pack mule climbing stairs to my fourth floor apartment without a single offer to help, mind you I walk by a couple dozen men from my car to my apartment, they all live in the same large apartment building and take the time to say hello but it never dawns on them to offer help. It isnt their fault, things are changing in society and it is very sad.
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1/10/2009 1:14:52 PM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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fuzzlewhumper
Corpus Christi, TX
age: 41
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I still know my manners. Holding doors, taking off hats, etc... It's just the code.
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1/11/2009 6:11:43 PM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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bud3383
Jacksonville, FL
age: 26
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I still open the doors for everyone and I'm from the younger generation. We still exist.
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1/11/2009 6:17:43 PM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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barbaraajo
Reston, VA
age: 53
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I have 2 sons,16 and 10 and I have been raising them BOTH to ALWAYS open doors for people, especially ladies.
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1/11/2009 6:21:15 PM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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towfr0g
Lawrenceville, GA
age: 53
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Barb,I would open all doors for you
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1/11/2009 8:02:15 PM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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bigfrank246
Saint Clair Shores, MI
age: 49
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I'm a old fashion type man I still open doors for a women and beleive it or not don't jump into bed with out getting to know a women first.So if there is any women out there in my area Mich. just write me
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1/11/2009 9:17:39 PM |
What ever happened to men that open doors for women? |
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lookingformyman
Redding, CA
age: 53
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I don't disagree with the women that like the door open for them, but when you talk about yourself "just being old fashioned" keep in mind that these things are old fashioned also... Having a warm dinner on the table for your man when he gets home from work, having his laundry done and ironed for him, keeping a clean house for him, taking care of the need of the children while he makes a living for the family and last but not least, providing him with sex whenever he wants it. A man likes to be "taken care of too". Just some old fashioned trivia for you....
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