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| 1/27/2009 4:23:23 PM |
Think before you speak |
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ilikerock
Lansing, MI
age: 42
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 I'm crying I'm laughing so hard.
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| 1/27/2009 4:24:02 PM |
Think before you speak |
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uhhhlifeis
Smiths Station, AL
age: 48
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LAST BUT NOT LEAST TESTIMONY:
This had most of the state of Michigan laughing for 2 days and a very
embarrassed female news anchor who will, in the future, likely think before
she speaks.
What happens when you predict snow but don't get any!
We had a female news anchor that,
the day after it was supposed to have snowed and didn't, turned to the
weatherman and asked:
'So Bob, where's that 8 inches you promised me last night?'
Not only did HE have to leave the set,
but half the crew did too they were laughing so hard!
Believable! 
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| 1/27/2009 4:25:20 PM |
Think before you speak |
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sunshine100862
Louisville, KY
age: 46
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LMAO! Yep, she should have thought!
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| 1/27/2009 4:48:09 PM |
Think before you speak |
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mathwiz
Calipatria, CA
age: 47
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Thanks for the chuckle.....
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| 1/27/2009 6:33:37 PM |
Think before you speak |
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mark_penn_state
Point Pleasant Beach, NJ
age: 47
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Please read the following story.. I think it fits the Think before you....
The husband leans over and asks his wife, 'Do you remember the firsttime we had sex together over fifty years ago? We went behind thevillage tavern where you leaned against the back fence and I made loveto you.''Yes', she says, 'I remember it well.''OK,' he s ays, 'How about taking a stroll around there again and we cando it for old time's sake?''Oh Jim, you old devil, that sounds like a crazy, but good idea!'A police officer sitting in the next booth heard their conversation and,having a chuckle to himself, he thinks to himself, I've got to see thesetwo old-timers having sex against a fence. I'll just keep an eye on themso there's
no trouble. So he follows them.The elderly couple walks haltingly along, leaning on each other forsupport aided by walking sticks. Finally, they get to the back of thetavern and make their way to the fence.. The old lady lifts her skirtand the old man drops his trousers. As she leans against the fence, theold man moves in.. Then suddenly they erupt into the most furious sexthat the policeman has ever seen. This goes on for about ten minuteswhile both are making loud noises and moaning and screaming. Finally,they both collapse, panting on the ground.The policeman is amazed. He thinks he has learned something about lifeand old age that he didn't know.After about half an hour of lying on the ground recovering, the oldcouple struggles to their feet and puts their clothes back on. Thepoliceman, is still watching and thinks to himself, this is trulyamazing, I've got to ask them what their secret
is.So, as the couple passes, he says to them, 'Excuse me, but that wassomething else. You must've had a fantastic sex life together. Is theresome sort of secret to this?'Shaking, the old man is barely able to reply, 'Fifty years ago that wasn't an electric fence
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| 1/28/2009 12:38:17 PM |
Think before you speak |
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lookin4luv63
Columbus, OH
age: 46 online now!
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| 1/28/2009 2:27:51 PM |
Think before you speak |
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funinfrcr
French Creek, WV
age: 43
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Mark and Keith. I am laughing so hard I am crying and can hardly catch my breath. I have not laughed this hard for a while. Thanks so much. I even had a headache when I began reading and it has disappeared. 
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| 1/28/2009 3:14:35 PM |
Think before you speak |
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serenityfrank
Toms River, NJ
age: 50
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you guys are gonna make me pee,,thanks
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| 1/28/2009 3:28:24 PM |
Think before you speak |
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lookin4luv63
Columbus, OH
age: 46 online now!
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Happy to have been of service Frank!
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| 1/28/2009 3:31:15 PM |
Think before you speak |
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funluvromance
Bedford, PA
age: 46
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OH I love it Mark!!!! That was priceless!!
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| 1/28/2009 3:38:48 PM |
Think before you speak |
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eurasianmeg
Eureka, CA
age: 49
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I cant
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| 1/28/2009 3:42:17 PM |
Think before you speak |
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mark_penn_state
Point Pleasant Beach, NJ
age: 47
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your welcome.. I got that couple story from a friend.. and I did not see the ending coming.. did you?? 
and the testimonies... LMAO
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| 1/28/2009 3:47:36 PM |
Think before you speak |
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hattie1
Waterford, MI
age: 50
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lmao, those were all soooo goooddd, thanks so much for the laughs...
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| 1/28/2009 3:53:03 PM |
Think before you speak |
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colbaltblue
Florence, OR
age: 42
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A lady was asked to attend a conference in another state. She was so excited because she has never flown before. She arrived very early at the airport to make sure she would not miss her flight. As she walked around the airport she noticed a fortune teller machine. She puts in a guarter and out pops a little piece of paper. It read, "you are going to fart". Shortly after reading this, she did indeed fart. She was shocked at this and thought it to be extrodinary. She puts in another quarter in the machine and out pops this little piece of paper. It read, "you are going to get laid". She couldnt believe what it said, so she tossed the paper away and went outside for a smoke. Sure enough, this guy comes out of nowhere, grabs her, those her in the bushes and has sex with her.
she stands up, adjusts herself and her outfit. Stunned, she staggers back into the airport, goes up to the fortune teller machine and puts in a guarter. Out pops this little piece of paper. It read, "while you were out fartin and f**kin around, you missed your flight"
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| 1/28/2009 3:57:13 PM |
Think before you speak |
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nab5055
Medford, NJ
age: 44
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