| 5/13/2009 6:47:12 AM |
How do you know when it's over? |
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lollipopzrock
Jacksonville, FL
age: 32
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What triggers your red flags? When is it time to walk away?
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| 5/13/2009 6:48:06 AM |
How do you know when it's over? |
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evileddy
Ottawa, ON
age: 37
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When the bad times outnumber the good times.
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| 5/13/2009 6:55:36 AM |
How do you know when it's over? |
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sea_1
Mesa, AZ
age: 58
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Believe me hun...you'll know.....you just know..(sigh)......Sea
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| 5/13/2009 7:05:11 AM |
How do you know when it's over? |
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quitesassy
Massillon, OH
age: 41
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A big red flag for me is when I am asked or expected to change
something about myself that goes against my values and beliefs.
Compromise is needed and change is good when appropriate.
There are many other big, obvious signs, but above all, respect
yourself and really listen.
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| 5/13/2009 7:05:15 AM |
How do you know when it's over? |
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edgeofsandias
Placitas, NM
age: 43
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When he no longer enhances your life. I'm not talking short term, like a life event that just happened and everyone needs time to heal, but some personality trait that isn't going to change.
Off topic, OP you have beautiful eyes!
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| 5/13/2009 7:09:26 AM |
How do you know when it's over? |
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gjlonelyman
Grand Junction, CO
age: 52
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When he no longer enhances your life. I'm not talking short term, like a life event that just happened and everyone needs time to heal, but some personality trait that isn't going to change.
Off topic, OP you have beautiful eyes!
Re: off topic remark. She certainly does
ON topic..when the calls, texts and emails slow to a crawl then completely disappear..or when they make excuses to not see you time after time, and if and when they DO see you, seem cold distant and indifferent.
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| 5/13/2009 7:12:55 AM |
How do you know when it's over? |
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lollipopzrock
Jacksonville, FL
age: 32
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OFF TOPIC: THANKS
OT: GI you just hit a cord.
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| 5/13/2009 7:19:48 AM |
How do you know when it's over? |
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lotstdo
Henderson, NV
age: 49
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when you lose the ability to negotiate resolutions to your concerns
For some they just get bored and want some new meat
For some its when something better comes along
for some its whenever they get faced with any form of commitment
Bottom line its different for everyone
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| 5/13/2009 7:20:51 AM |
How do you know when it's over? |
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ckngraj
Rochester, NY
age: 44
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Re: off topic remark. She certainly does
ON topic..when the calls, texts and emails slow to a crawl then completely disappear..or when they make excuses to not see you time after time, and if and when they DO see you, seem cold distant and indifferent.
I agree with this one although I have not experienced that at all. You also know
it is over when you catch them in lie after lie, and EXCUSES are huge red flag.
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| 5/13/2009 8:06:20 AM |
How do you know when it's over? |
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lista32
Minneapolis, MN
age: 35
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darlin, you'll no example and mabye my desion will help you!
i have been friends with this guy for 17 years right now we are all grown up he joins the service and so last year we start talking, he comes hom in sept.last year from there down hill he calls me out my name disrespects me in front of who ever..phsically mentally emotionally finacially used me...now he is going to afganastan...and he mind u cheats he, took my kindness for weakness.i guess as 33 yrs alod what im trying to say if you have any doubt or have any question go with that n run.....
never settle for less keep your standards high..
if your with some one and they don't give you butterflys in you belly when they walk in the room or complament you hunny if they don't have what you have or more...save yourself for that one...what atracks a man more is to see an independent ladie that wont take no shit....
remember as i look at it id rather be by myself then settle for less..
good luck sweety
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| 5/13/2009 8:22:47 AM |
How do you know when it's over? |
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susansheart839
Port Saint Lucie, FL
age: 63
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When it hurts to remember the good times and you are still living together!
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| 5/13/2009 8:25:00 AM |
How do you know when it's over? |
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brockr23
Chandler, AZ
age: 35
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I knew it was over when:
Intimacy, not sex, but intimacy was a distant memory.
I felt like I was a convenience.
It was more comfortable to stay and not change.
The conversations were about bills and nothing more.
She went on vacations without me.
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| 5/13/2009 8:39:19 AM |
How do you know when it's over? |
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awakeing
Walled Lake, MI
age: 38
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When it's not about really loving you and you only
serve a "purpose" in their life like slave, nanny, maid, cook, and
their personal doctor.
In other words you do all the work and they just sit and b*tch at you.
Just being nice to you 3 times a year is only to throw you enough crumbs
of hope to keep you in your place.
When you ask him.."What's happiness and love to you?"
and he responds....
The language of love is reciepts.
All love is....is respect.
He shows you he believes love is about power, control and money.
You tell him you love him and he says..."You say that too much, don't
tell me that."
He can't look you in the eye. He can't hold your hand. He can't touch you.
He get's angry if you ask him for sex, a hug, a kiss.
He lies/or has lied to you about everything.
He cheats on you.
He tells you that he'll kill you as his hands are wrapped around your neck.
He gives you a black eye.
He loves beer, drugs, other women more than he loves you.
Have I forgotten anything ladies? 
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| 5/13/2009 8:54:02 AM |
How do you know when it's over? |
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leggieflblonde
Jacksonville, FL
age: 50
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you just feel it with everything in you...
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| 5/13/2009 9:00:16 AM |
How do you know when it's over? |
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cschaeffer
Jasper, IN
age: 35
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When they stop leaving money on the nightstand.... Or stop asking for it...
Seriously...
When I start asking myself these kinds of questions... It's usually heading that way.
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| 5/13/2009 9:08:42 AM |
How do you know when it's over? |
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sweetiepieslove
Orange Park, FL
age: 33
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ON topic..when the calls, texts and emails slow to a crawl then completely disappear..or when they make excuses to not see you time after time, and if and when they DO see you, seem cold distant and indifferent.
WOW, very true!!
Evileddy also had a REALLY great answer.
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| 5/13/2009 9:28:27 AM |
How do you know when it's over? |
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spider77
Adamsville, AL
age: 59
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When the only time you hear from them, is when they want something.
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| 5/13/2009 9:42:25 AM |
How do you know when it's over? |
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sweet_li
Orlando, FL
age: 45
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when your feelings for them have changed and you've fallen out of love with them, that's when it's over (at least for me it is).
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| 5/13/2009 10:01:42 AM |
How do you know when it's over? |
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longlocks40
Cedar Rapids, IA
age: 45
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when they b*tch and can't accept you for who you are or when they lie.
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| 5/13/2009 10:04:18 AM |
How do you know when it's over? |
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lollipopzrock
Jacksonville, FL
age: 32
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When do you know the difference between becoming too comfortable and and knowing it's over.
[Edited 5/13/2009 10:07:39 AM ]
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| 5/13/2009 10:13:02 AM |
How do you know when it's over? |
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brockr23
Chandler, AZ
age: 35
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I knew it was too comfortable when I just accepted that there was no intimacy, and I stayed anyway because it was easier than leaving.
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| 5/13/2009 10:22:41 AM |
How do you know when it's over? |
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jayson07345
Reseda, CA
age: 53
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its not over until the fat lady sings and yes its happened to me 
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| 5/13/2009 10:26:24 AM |
How do you know when it's over? |
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smootheshane
Hephzibah, GA
age: 24
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What triggers your red flags? When is it time to walk away
when i see my woman with another man
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| 5/13/2009 10:29:55 AM |
How do you know when it's over? |
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hsprin
Savannah, MO
age: 35
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When you have to ask yourself is it over? Should I walk away?
Most people know when it is over, we have feelings and we start questioning things. It is just hard to walk away from someone and it is hard to disconnect and lot of times it is because it is our comfort zone, good or bad.
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| 5/13/2009 10:33:05 AM |
How do you know when it's over? |
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bingbinger
Dubuque, IA
age: 36
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When you have stopped trying to work on things.
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| 5/13/2009 10:37:48 AM |
How do you know when it's over? |
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darlinshel
Clayton, NC
age: 42
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When the only time you hear from them, is when they want something.
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| 5/13/2009 10:41:04 AM |
How do you know when it's over? |
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howudoinnn
Grantsburg, WI
age: 40
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when u come home and the mess that was there is gone  then u send a thank you note back
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| 5/13/2009 10:45:22 AM |
How do you know when it's over? |
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jayson07345
Reseda, CA
age: 53
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when they stop being nice to you
when they try to change you
when they say, "you should..."
when she leaves the toilet seat up....(hidden messages)
when you are just about to have sex &
she stops & says we need to have a discussion(& its not about sex)
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| 5/13/2009 10:51:13 AM |
How do you know when it's over? |
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hsprin
Savannah, MO
age: 35
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When do you know the difference between becoming too comfortable and and knowing it's over.
I really think that the two are the same really. Because when you are too comfortable you are just kind of going through the motions. It's the same thing everyday and your just kind of stuck in that rut. And people stay because that is what they know, what they have lived for say the last 2 yrs.
You know that it is over when you see that your in a rut and are just going through the motions but your scared to leave. You don't want to give up your security blanket even if you know your not happy or deserve more.
Lots of people wonder if it is so bad, or is it worth leaving to be alone or to start over with someone else. That you have already invested "X" amount of time into this relationship. Sometimes it is just truly so hard to cut your loses and bail out. Especially when you just not sure. But if you truly are doubting or thinking if it is over or should it be over, it most likely already is over. JMO
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| 5/13/2009 11:36:34 AM |
How do you know when it's over? |
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sweetiepieslove
Orange Park, FL
age: 33
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When they want their cake and a** cream too.
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| 5/13/2009 12:13:03 PM |
How do you know when it's over? |
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annigma3
Madison, WI
age: 37
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ON topic..when the calls, texts and emails slow to a crawl then completely disappear..or when they make excuses to not see you time after time, and if and when they DO see you, seem cold distant and indifferent.
Wow. This one just hit me like a ton of bricks. Funny thing is....I KNEW this, and was going to answer it. Why do we never see it for ourselves tho? I think I finally have my answer....
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| 5/13/2009 12:20:14 PM |
How do you know when it's over? |
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gjlonelyman
Grand Junction, CO
age: 52
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When they want their cake and a** cream too.
I know I should have been revolted by that..but..strangely..I wasnt...
I see an awful lot of hurt coming out from this thread. Hope it's as cathartic for you as it was for me..
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| 5/13/2009 12:38:21 PM |
How do you know when it's over? |
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cruise427
Los Angeles, CA
age: 43
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.... i usually try to work things out..
i guess..for me, if theres no communication,
there will not be a happy ending..
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| 5/13/2009 12:40:36 PM |
How do you know when it's over? |
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reba061
Huntington, WV
age: 46
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I MEET A GUY ON ONE OF THESE SITES AND HE STARTED TELLING ME HE LOVED ME ON OUR SECOND DATE. DROVE IN TOWN TO SEE ME,AND WHEN I NEVER DROVE TO HIS HOUSE HE GOT VERY UPSET.HE ONLY LIVES 3 HOURS AWAY WE EMAILED BACK AND FORTH TELLING HOW MUCH HE MISSED ME AND CARED ABOUT ME.THEN AFTER 3 WEEKS HE SENT ME A EMAIL SAYING HE HAD SOCCER GAMES ALL WEEKEND AND COULD NOT COME IN,SO I SAID I WAS GOING TO START SEEING OTHER PEPOL HE GOSE THAT IS OK BECAUSE I HAVE A GIRLFRIEND I THOUGHT YOU KNEW.HOW WAS I SOUPPOSED TO KNOW.WERE HAVING PHONE SEX EVERY NIGHT AND YOUR TELLING ME YOU LOVE ME.
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| 5/13/2009 12:41:25 PM |
How do you know when it's over? |
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wsprs0nthewind
Powell, TN
age: 46
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When one of you ain't calling.
When you dread seeing his/her number on caller ID.
When you can't think of anything good to say.
When you wish they would go away.
When you look at them and think what the hell was I thinking.
When you make up reasons not to see them.
When you/they change your screen name, block your email, change your phone numbers.
When the police officer delievers the order of protection.
When they move and don't leave a forwarding address.
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| 5/13/2009 12:45:24 PM |
How do you know when it's over? |
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122750again
Sioux Falls, SD
age: 60
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When they have SEX with someone else 
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| 5/13/2009 12:47:01 PM |
How do you know when it's over? |
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hsprin
Savannah, MO
age: 35
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Nothing most clear then that! At least for me.
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| 5/13/2009 2:13:42 PM |
How do you know when it's over? |
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annigma3
Madison, WI
age: 37
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When they are texting someone else while you are together.
When they stop answering your calls/texts.
When they keep coming up with excuses as to why they haven't called/texted.
When they dodge all the questions you ask them about what's wrong, what they want, etc.
When they won't commit to seeing you again, they give roundabout answers.
When they have time to flirt/talk to others, but not you.
When every single one of their patterns has changed, with lousy explanations as to why.
When they can't be honest.
When they can't communicate.
WHen they can't treat you with the respect you deserve.
When they aren't trying, or willing to try, as hard as you are.
When they keep hurting you, but don't seem to care.
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| 5/13/2009 2:31:49 PM |
How do you know when it's over? |
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karebear70
Seattle, WA
age: 41
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Yep Mal... i would say that about covers it!! Spells over to me...
Geez...whatever happen to good ol fashioned..straight up honesty and communication. What is so hard about saying " i'm just not feeling it and not ready for this" we resort to games and head trips. Pointless and a total waste of time..and a lot of hurt and confusion could be avoided. Really...it's so easy...you open your mouth and SPEAK!!
maybe I'm wrong....
[Edited 5/13/2009 2:45:16 PM ]
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| 5/13/2009 3:49:12 PM |
How do you know when it's over? |
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sweetiepieslove
Orange Park, FL
age: 33
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When they are texting someone else while you are together.
When they stop answering your calls/texts.
When they keep coming up with excuses as to why they haven't called/texted.
When they dodge all the questions you ask them about what's wrong, what they want, etc.
When they won't commit to seeing you again, they give roundabout answers.
When they have time to flirt/talk to others, but not you.
When every single one of their patterns has changed, with lousy explanations as to why.
When they can't be honest.
When they can't communicate.
WHen they can't treat you with the respect you deserve.
When they aren't trying, or willing to try, as hard as you are.
When they keep hurting you, but don't seem to care.
Quoted for truth!
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