why do men cheat and lie

3/22/2008 8:37:09 AM	why do men cheat and lie
sandangel55 Menasha, WI age: 57	i have been seeing this man for 3 months, and things were doing great , and i had to go away for the weekend, and found out he slepted with another gal. he even put her on the phone just to hurt me more. he told me he loved me, and wanted to marry me 2 weeks ago, now he is doing this. can i trust him again??? need help here to understand
3/22/2008 8:45:51 AM	why do men cheat and lie
forestrose Calgary, AB age: 55	I wouldn't even grace him with a Hello ever again. But I won't have people (it isn't gender specific) in my life who lie, cheat, manipulate, abuse, control, or just generally act like jerks. They have no integrity. Don't waste your time unless you want more of the same. He has taken great pains to show you who he is, and what he thinks of your relationship. There will only be more bull to follow from this loser. Oh, and I feel really sorry that you ran into such a loser. He was very disrespectful to you, and I am just fuming that he did this to you. Sorry, Sand, I don't know what kind of help you were looking for, because to me, it is unforgiveable. He acted like a 2 yr old temper tantrum - you left him alone for the weekend, so he showed you! I don't see how or why you would ever trust him again. A zebra doesn't change its stripes. [Edited 3/22/2008 8:50:05 AM]
3/22/2008 9:01:33 AM	why do men cheat and lie
vanohm Hayward, CA age: 26	Generally, they cheat and lie for the same reasons women do...they aren't satisfied with you. Instead of taking the right step and addressing the issues to why they aren't satisfied and possibly taking steps to fix it, they'd rather not face the problem and just get their satisfaction somewhere else. My only other opinions to why they cheat or lie is either just for the thrill of it or they are pretty insecure. Either one unfortunately are pretty common due to lack of maturity. Welcome to the 21st century where our world is growing stupider day by day
3/22/2008 9:36:49 AM	why do men cheat and lie
tecman Manassas, VA age: 48	I think there are a lot of men and women that have been hurt on these dating sites that work out their issues with the people they meet. Not an excuse for what this guy did. He's totally in the wrong. But I've had women get me interested in them and the jerk me around too. When someone tells me they love me after two weeks? Well..... I do know that a lot of guys will tell a women anything to get laid. And some women will tell a guy anything just to feel safe. JMHO
3/22/2008 10:11:07 AM	why do men cheat and lie
suec0239 Billings, MT age: 61	Not just men...but anyone who cheats and lies do it because often they get away with it, and lack of conscience and morals.
3/22/2008 10:23:52 AM	why do men cheat and lie
oneadvntursgrl Boca Raton, FL age: 47	Because they are cowards, and because for too many years, they have been allowed to, and gotten away with it, and forgiven too many times, with no recourse...they still think in this day and age, that they are entitled to spread their seed like in the wild kingdom... ATTENTION MEN: it doesn't work that way!!! This is a civilized society...make a commitment, stick to it or back off and own up to it...or, just don't make the commitment. And women, stop forcing commitment to men that aren't into it, just cause you are ready!!! But, women do the same thing, only seem to get caught less than men. Women seem to feel they are entitled and don't feel they are the dogs they accuse the men of being if they cheat. Women rationalize, and often, cheat with their emotions, then their bodies, men cheat more with their bodies, then their emotions. Which is right? NEITHER!!!!
3/22/2008 11:03:57 AM	why do men cheat and lie
smilin_bob Broadway, VA age: 47	Sand, I am saddened to hear this has happened to you. If this had happened to me, I don't believe there is a chance for a relationship. Trust has been broken. It was bad enough he slept with someone else when he had opportunity. It was even worse that he had you talk on the phone with his new lover. He has no respect for you. Relating to his actions, the only thing I can think of is that NEITHER him or his new lover have any respect for other people. Both were very cruel. No apologies, just a 'rub your nose in it' mentality. I do believe that they both acted with malice. I do not know what your reaction was. If you were your own best friend, what would you suggest to yourself? May your heart heal. May you realize in your heart that you do not need to be around a person like this. I wish you all the best. ~hugs~
3/22/2008 11:08:25 AM	why do men cheat and lie
smilin_bob Broadway, VA age: 47	OneAdventurousGirl, Come on now.. Tell how you really feel! giggle Actually, your words are very true. Right to the core. Thank you for saying what needs to be said. (humbly bows with respect)
3/22/2008 11:11:32 AM	why do men cheat and lie
oneadvntursgrl Boca Raton, FL age: 47	My pleasure smilin_bob....somethings strike a nerve...and we as a society, are so quick to judge the men that cheat, esp, cause they get caught more often, but there are so many women out there doing the same thing! It is all really pretty sad. Be in or out of a relationship, in my opinion...and if we really want to have a relationship, then we owe it to our partner, to work at it! But, tht is JMO! Who knows anymore...
3/22/2008 11:12:54 AM	why do men cheat and lie
mrsal Winfield, KS age: 22	It does bring up another issue thou just because women, has been screwed so bad by some guys before, they found it hard to believe again and once there is a guy comes along it would be really hard for the woman to believe and the guy to win her believe unfair to both, dont u think so
3/22/2008 11:24:13 AM	why do men cheat and lie
oneadvntursgrl Boca Raton, FL age: 47	Yes, mrsal, can work for both men and women that have been burned....can cause many issues for them getting into and trusting in another relationship! Darn those ex's having that kind of power!!!!
3/22/2008 11:25:20 AM	why do men cheat and lie
thebestman Alpharetta, GA age: 34	probably the same reason why women cheat and lie... some men cheat and lie some women cheat and lie
3/22/2008 11:28:34 AM	why do men cheat and lie
mrsal Winfield, KS age: 22	@one: yeah, it works both way but it is so not fair, isnt it?
3/22/2008 11:32:58 AM	why do men cheat and lie
oneadvntursgrl Boca Raton, FL age: 47	Life is sadly, not always fair...just the way it is....and you must learn to not give another that much control over you and your emotions, that you can't move forward...just be careful, and pay full attention for cues of another before allowing your heart to fall hard...and don't ever stop watching those cues, and pattern changes! Good luck!!!!
3/22/2008 11:37:13 AM	why do men cheat and lie
magtag East York, ON age: 41	oneadventursgrl... Darn those ex's having that kind of power!!!! You've made great points. But I feel the need to comment on the last one. Only WE can give them that "power", therefore, we can take it away from them! Let's not let exes have power over our self-esteem or our futures. Let the responsibility lie where it belongs. If an ex has cheated on you, it was their wrong doing, not the whole world's. Let that ex have ALL the glory of their choices and stew in it! Does it hurt? Hell yes!! But, should it shape our opinions of all men/women out there, should it shape our opinions of ourselves? Absolutely not! We need to deal with the pain that comes with being cheated on, for sure, but then it's time to say to ourselves...this ass hurt me and was not worthy of my trust or my time and effort...go forward I will choose a man/woman that IS worthy of my trust and will not give my time, nor my heart to anyone who is not. There is no compromise here. Love yourself, be confident in yourself and give what you expect to receive. Do no settle for less from yourself or anyone else.

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