| 6/6/2008 12:36:52 PM |
Do you want to know upfront if someone has a disability? |
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mountainman7
Chattanooga, TN
age: 41
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Tell him. If he's not willing to accept you for whom are in complete honesty, you would have found out later on anyway.
Scott
Hello Ladies, That is my problem. I am interested in this man I just met here on datehookup, but I'm afraid to tell him about my having copd. I know if we were to meet he would figure it out right straight cause I am on oxygen and can not walk very far without stopping and standing still for a couple of minutes to catch my breath. But I keep going. I know this would probably be a turn off to some one that is very insensative, but I have a lot to offer and I am a good person. If you have a comment let me know. I'm open to suggestions. Kris
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| 6/6/2008 12:40:01 PM |
Do you want to know upfront if someone has a disability? |
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mountainman7
Chattanooga, TN
age: 41
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You're right there's great men (like me, ok, so I couldn't help brag LOL) out there who can see past a woman's disabilities, "differences", etc. I would want to know what they were upfront and then discuss them in detail. If a woman is going to be completely honest with me, she sure better tell me upfront about anything she has like a disability or "difference". I'd rather address issues like that at the beginning, as opposed to later on when I am finally told about it. It's called being proactive and responsible in a person's life.
Scott
Well ladies,,yes there are some decent men still left out there that aren't afraidto take a chance. I have met 1 and actually were going out tomorrow night to dinner. He knows about all my ailments and it didn't scare him off. If they like you enough they can handle it. He is a sweet heart and we get along great.
Keep your chin up it can happen for you also..... 
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| 6/6/2008 4:07:42 PM |
Do you want to know upfront if someone has a disability? |
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thepkk
Ash Grove, MO
age: 53
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I am always honest in everything so I tell everyone up front. Besides the cane may give me away.  I hope anyman I meet would be honest with me too.
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| 6/7/2008 5:16:56 AM |
Do you want to know upfront if someone has a disability? |
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mountainman7
Chattanooga, TN
age: 41
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I would hope so. The cane eh? There's more than use one use for using a cane. It's a nice way of keeping "your man" in line when he's doing something he shouldn't be *laughing*.
Scott
I am always honest in everything so I tell everyone up front. Besides the cane may give me away. I hope anyman I meet would be honest with me too.
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| 6/9/2008 5:24:36 PM |
Do you want to know upfront if someone has a disability? |
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kaitlynsnana
Michigan City, IN
age: 43
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Well Foxy,,,,,It ended as fast as it started lol. He is a good friend whom i have known for 5 years,,his age got in HIS way,,he is 12 yrs older than me. It didn't bother me,,age is only a #,,but I guess it bothered him alot. We still go for a drive or go to dinner once in awhile and we will still be friends,,but no relationship will come of it. I am ok with it and tried to tell him to get over the age difference,,if it doewsnt bother me it shouldnt bother you. Guess he didn't look at it that way.All is good and i'm on the loose again 
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| 6/9/2008 6:58:40 PM |
Do you want to know upfront if someone has a disability? |
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mountainman7
Chattanooga, TN
age: 41
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Sorry to hear that things ended the way they did. Scott
Well Foxy,,,,,It ended as fast as it started lol. He is a good friend whom i have known for 5 years,,his age got in HIS way,,he is 12 yrs older than me. It didn't bother me,,age is only a #,,but I guess it bothered him alot. We still go for a drive or go to dinner once in awhile and we will still be friends,,but no relationship will come of it. I am ok with it and tried to tell him to get over the age difference,,if it doewsnt bother me it shouldnt bother you. Guess he didn't look at it that way.All is good and i'm on the loose again
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| 6/14/2008 10:32:56 AM |
Do you want to know upfront if someone has a disability? |
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yaimabratsowhat
Jackson, MI
age: 31
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For me it would not really matter
cause if I like someone I going to
still like them either way...
You like what you like and dont want ya dont
It really should not matter either way
if you connect with a person and that
connection is strong why does it matter
if they have a disability??
people that care are not really worth you
time anyways are they?????
Makes ya think huh...
no body is perfect some just hide it
hoping you will never find out i guess
JMO...
so for me when you are ready to tell me
you will... till then why does it really
matter I guess....
 NYKKI
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| 6/18/2008 4:43:58 PM |
Do you want to know upfront if someone has a disability? |
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austin64
Haughton, LA
age: 43
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 I believe you have to be true to your self and not worry about what others think of you. Relationships that start with deception end in deception.
If one truly loves you it will be for what is in your Heart not what is wrapped around it.
A bit of wisdom that helps me when I'm down
Sometimes GOD tries to the utmost those whom he wishes to BLESS!!!
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| 6/19/2008 12:50:00 PM |
Do you want to know upfront if someone has a disability? |
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springfever100
Nepean, ON
age: 41
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I always let everyone know ASAP, if they don't like or accept it.
then they are too shallow to continue a relationship anyway...
and on a footnote, I have met many many disabled people, and I'm
always in awe how super friendly they all are, myself included,.
some non disabled people would rather go out with a wife beater, drug addict,
or whatever and wonder they get treated like crap, when we have
these wonderful disabled people who don't take life for granted and cherish
every moment... I myself being one of them....
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| 6/19/2008 4:24:56 PM |
Do you want to know upfront if someone has a disability? |
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fish_r_man
Aurora, MO
age: 48
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Health and financial issues are things I do not discuss with everyone. If I start talking with a lady I let her know soon enough but I do not put these issues on my profile for every con-man in the world to see and try to take advantage of. I figure any rational person will understand that.
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| 6/23/2008 7:55:04 PM |
Do you want to know upfront if someone has a disability? |
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springfever100
Nepean, ON
age: 41
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I agree, don't put them in your profile for the world to see, and negatively judge ya
I meant in reasonable time, to someone who really shows interest in ya like
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| 6/26/2008 9:34:22 AM |
Do you want to know upfront if someone has a disability? |
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nitecaller
Edmonton, AB
age: 45
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i feel if your disability is not noticable then you should say hey i have type 2 Multiple sclerosis which after 24 yrs has just now left me with dealing with a weakend right side and a drop foot lol its like i dropped my foot can ya pick it up lol sorry but if its noticable then they should at least ask about 
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| 6/26/2008 11:28:49 AM |
Do you want to know upfront if someone has a disability? |
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ccherie
Salem, OR
age: 54
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I would have to say yes....I have learned by experience
Being disabled myself, however I don't always want to accept the fact that it is neccesary
It is not that people are always looking to judge us...but if they are caught unaware, they may feel foolish, or not know what to do...emotions and feelings get triggered and people become defensive or hurt and want to protect themselves
I am deaf... when I go out in public sometimes I feel like I have to say "I am deaf I cannot hear" before I even say my name, I don't always want to do this. Most of the time I can lipread well enough to get by. But if I don't tell that I am deaf, pretend I understand when I do not and the other person figures it out...they get upset and hurt and angry. Because they thought they were being heard, and feel they were being ignored whether I meant it or not. I honestly think people are more upset about not being heard then my not hearing.
I try to be positive and consider myself an embassador for myself, every time I walk out the door. It never gets better on its own, the situation never is the same, there is no comfort zone.
I appreciate places were you can open up. My family was my comfort zone, until the divorce where upon I was tossed from the ship to a life raft so to speak. And I am learning to find a new safe place. But in the real world it is a daily effort to go with the flow and communicate and be a part of life. Communication, means sharing. The good, bad etc. So again, I would have to say yes, I would want a person to be upfront with their disability.
As for the people who judge... you can't reason with those that do not have common sense or courtesy. Retaliating only makes us a reflection of them. When you look in the mirror do you want to see someone like that?
All easy to say... very hard to do. Takes emotional strength. I don't always have it. There are things, words and phrases that upset me. I would like to think that when I acknowledge these things to others, that they would listen....not get upset or angry but realize that we all don't know how our words affect others. If I said something that hurt someone, I would want to know so I would not do it again. Sometimes people need to be made aware of what hurts.. it is kind of a play if forward... and maybe someone else will be spared a hurtful remark...
JMO
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| 6/26/2008 10:09:09 PM |
Do you want to know upfront if someone has a disability? |
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pandamxgirl
Erick, OK
age: 47
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Hello everyone, I am new to DateHookup.dating and I just finished reading all of the posts here to catch up. I am very up front about everything and let the card fall as they may.
As far as letting people know up front about a disability I say Heck Yeah! If someone reads your profile (as some have read mine) and have a problem with it well they are the ones that are that are just too shallow to have a real relationship . To some men I might even come off as angry , but I'm not, just honest and straight forward. In the mean time I am doing just fine without a man in my life . (Not to say that a man wouldn't be nice LOL) I don't NEED another person to fulfill my life and make me happy, but I do want a companion to share my life with. Not much to ask for really.
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| 6/27/2008 4:11:43 AM |
Do you want to know upfront if someone has a disability? |
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bigbadklondyke
Eaton, OH
age: 44
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That's horrible; I had a similar situation happen, the guy didn't look at me all through dinneer, he kind of turned sideways and when the waitress came over to ask if we wanted desert, he got up and put his coat on and walked away leaving me at the table, he paid and was waiting outside (I don't know why) as he just walked on ahead and didn't even walk me to my car. I guess I should be glad he paid, some don't even do that. It's rough out there and for those of us with some problems even more difficult in todays cruel world.
HEY IF THE GUY OR GIRL CAN'T HANDLE IT THEN THEY R NOT WORTH IT U C MY PIC I DON'T HIDE IT & I LOVE 2 HAVE FUN WITH IT C YA 
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