| 4/7/2008 6:10:18 AM |
How do treat a girl with a chip on her shoulder |
|
justlaidback
Lubbock, TX
age: 52
|
I met someone really nice but she's got a chip on her shoulder. She's down on men because coming from a previous marriage. He belittled her, made her feel worthless, she's out to prove something, she was mentally abused, she can't get past the betrayal. Not going any further than having a friend,because of the abuse, how can I get her to let me care for her like she should have been along time ago, I need suggestions. 
|
| 4/7/2008 6:23:25 AM |
How do treat a girl with a chip on her shoulder |
|
mag11
New Port Richey, FL
age: 39
|
Heck good luck....I'm sorry I would be walk'n....Mikey
|
| 4/7/2008 6:36:10 AM |
How do treat a girl with a chip on her shoulder |
|
zeldor
Saint Charles, MO
age: 47
|
Be yourself. Some people once hurt do not manifest intimacy or trust easy.If you love this person & she has the personality you like be patient maybe she will open up to you.
You can not heal her only she can heal herself.Enjoy the loving times you share with her & let her be single incharge of herself.
Good Fortune be with you brother.
|
| 4/7/2008 6:44:36 AM |
How do treat a girl with a chip on her shoulder |
|
lonesomeloser
Louisville, KY
age: 49
|
I have found that duct tape and bailing wire work wonders...
|
| 4/7/2008 6:45:38 AM |
How do treat a girl with a chip on her shoulder |
|
muffycakes
Chanhassen, MN
age: 26
|
well i've been in that boat...not as long as your lady friend so it seems but i have been heavily dumped on by a couple guys....I have a sad habit of putting my head down and running away if a guy smiles at me from afar...its tricky just be tender but not too pushy...if she hasn't had time to heal then she will inevitably push you away....stick in there for a bit but if its not time for her then perhaps you should move on...good luck!
|
| 4/7/2008 6:55:33 AM |
How do treat a girl with a chip on her shoulder |
|
tx38austin
Dallas, TX
age: 38
|
She many never get over this with having so much torment from this guy.
|
| 4/7/2008 6:58:01 AM |
How do treat a girl with a chip on her shoulder |
|
flowergirl62
South Australia
Australia
age: 45
|
You will need to take this slowly but ultimately it has to be her decision to let you in. I was verbally abused by my ex for a very long time but didn't recognise it. I just thought that was part of marriage and became very depressed. Once I started talking to people about it I got the help I needed at the time.
|
| 4/7/2008 7:00:42 AM |
How do treat a girl with a chip on her shoulder |
|
justmemaree
Queensland
Australia
age: 45
|
I was the same as this lady u described............ but i got a major wake up call one day when i let a good man slip through my fingers......... from that day on have moved forward........... still got a little way to go.....but hey i have come along way as well........... so chin up............ and hang in there....... she might be worth the wait!!! 
|
| 4/7/2008 7:01:31 AM |
How do treat a girl with a chip on her shoulder |
|
jangel53
Brampton, ON
age: 54
|
Be kind, be her friend set her free, if she is yours she will return to you
|
| 4/7/2008 7:02:18 AM |
How do treat a girl with a chip on her shoulder |
|
lildifferent
Sacramento, CA
age: 46
|
for some reason Captain Save-A-Hoe comes to mind here........
I'm just sayin'.....
|
| 4/7/2008 7:13:50 AM |
How do treat a girl with a chip on her shoulder |
|
funfun62
Pender Island, BC
age: 46
|
I was in similar relationship it came to an end because of it. l don't no where your at with her. All you can do is show her that you care. Listen to her she may want to talk about it but finds it difficult. She is probably watching you for signs that you may be like her x. Think about what you say and how you say things, she is fragile and if you really want to be with her you are going to have to work very hard at it. Make her feel special and wanted.
|
| 4/7/2008 7:25:37 AM |
How do treat a girl with a chip on her shoulder |
|
winesong
Bend, OR
age: 60
|
I would offer that you be kind, and support her with reassurance that all men are not abusive, cruel, and demanding. Personally, I would have to have a
very strong desire/chemistry attraction, in order to put myself in the path
of a moving train...however..what ever you see and want, is important to you.
Some suggestions for your consideration:
get a copy of the DVD...THE SECRET..The Law of Attraction. It is based on
Quantum Physics, and the karma of living. What you put out there will be returned
to you. So..get her to consider opening her mind and heart to a new way to live.
Attract WHAT YOU WANT IN LIFE, NOT WHAT YOU DO NOT WANT. You attract the positive by
positive reinforcement, and positive thinking, and expectation. If you expect to be
mistreated, and abused, as that is what you are *used to*, often that is what you get
over and over again. Healthy people often AVOID and RUN from abused people....
too much work!!!
Try to have her understand the choice is UP TO HER..only she can reach out and
get help, or stay where she is emotionally.
You could start today by watching the NEW EARTH webinar every Monday evening. It is
free at OPRAH.com at 6:00pm Pacific time..(check your local time for today).
Watch this together...today is Chapter 6...setting yourself FREE of PAIN.
Great stime to start??? TODAY...give it time, baby steps, and be prepared sometimes
people are damaged and only know one behavior...run..if you cannot be subject
to harsh readjustment period..(months, years).
Life is short, living well with mental health is paramont,as your mental state, can
affect your physical health...in a hurry!
Wine
|
| 4/7/2008 12:21:20 PM |
How do treat a girl with a chip on her shoulder |
|
uptoc
Castle Rock, CO
age: 47
|
Well..I really think a little B/D play will fix this..the baseline IS trust,and with that,you can get to the chip on the shoulder thing!! uh..outside the box thinking here,if I wanted her I'd TRY anything!!!
|
| 4/7/2008 12:27:20 PM |
How do treat a girl with a chip on her shoulder |
|
aka_neo
Marathon, FL
age: 51 online now!
|
Find a gal who has an ever-ready battery in her heart,
not one with a chip programmed to show her ugly side.
|
| 4/7/2008 6:44:01 PM |
How do treat a girl with a chip on her shoulder |
|
coppermare
Grady, AL
age: 48
|
Your a good man to recognize it and want to see it through. My daughter use to say,( in her then 19 year old infinate wisdom) "when the right one comes along he'll see right through that tough bullshit to the inner softer side we know"
zeldor,funfun62, kudos to you guys!! It takes a special man to understand some things and be willing to fight for what they want. The hardest things to get sometimes are the best and most appreciated.
OP. Take your time with her, don't push, but don't ignore either. Never let her down and if you have to disappoint her always tell her why. Talk, talk, talk. Reassure, and NEVER lie!! Remind her that you are not him nor anyone from her past because for her that is hard not to compare. Do the opposite of what he did.
You say she is out to prove something? She has a taste of being in control finally and she'll wear it like a badge of honor. It wasn't easy to get and she's not about to let it go very quickly or easily. Let her know she has nothing to prove to you, that you want to prove everything to her. Hang tough and remember "People sometimes put up walls, not to keep others out, but to see who cares enough to tear them down"
|