My husband was Diagnosed with Glioblastoma. The most aggressive and malignant Brain Cancer. Feeling very alone.
I am taking care of one after 15 year`s, he now has brain cancer and Althmier`s, his brain is deteriating in a fast pace, his memorie`s are about gone; most of his left,side of his brain is shriveling up to nothing, how can one go on?
| 8/3/2013 7:09:47 PM |
Living with a terminally ill spouse. |
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daisybug62
Gilbert, AZ
53, joined Jul. 2013
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My husband was Diagnosed with Glioblastoma. The most aggressive and malignant Brain Cancer. Feeling very alone.
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| 8/3/2013 8:28:22 PM |
Living with a terminally ill spouse. |
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lovethelake17
Henderson, NV
57, joined May. 2009
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I'm so sorry to hear that.
I joined this group when my husband was in a coma, and I had no one to talk to about it, or anyone who understood the feelings surrounding it all. It helped immensely in just being somewhere where people "got it."
For a long time, I didn't even realize there were any other parts to this site, than this one group.
I'm sorry to have to welcome you, but welcome to the group and I hope you glean some comfort from us.
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| 8/3/2013 8:48:56 PM |
Living with a terminally ill spouse. |
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funnyface4him
Butler, PA
48, joined Mar. 2010
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Hi hun
I'm sorry seems like such inadequate words too send too you.
I found myself living in this room after my husband passed away, I found that even in a room full of people that I've known my whole life friends and family I felt all alone.
Fortuantly I Found this room with people who get it, lived it and know it. We all have our own perspectives on things but it's nice too come in here and be with others who can help me sort out this thing I now call my life.......
Hang in there sweetie and take every day one step at the time.....
Love Theresa
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| 8/4/2013 4:23:26 PM |
Living with a terminally ill spouse. |
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lookin4ones
Hurst, TX
55, joined Oct. 2010
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You'll have long days and night ahead. Take one day at a time. This may sound harsh, but it is the truth. It will all be over soon. Nothing last for ever, good or bad.
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| 8/4/2013 10:23:19 PM |
Living with a terminally ill spouse. |
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lovetoplay642
Beaverton, OR
69, joined Apr. 2011
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My little bride had lung cancer and by the time it was diagnosed it had spread to her brain, spinal column, and other areas. I was her caregiver for her last 10 months.
Some days were diamonds and some were pure crap but she and I both made the best of it and were probably closer than ever.
It's a day at a time, sometimes a minute and sometimes it's second.
Reach out to your friends. You'll be amazed who is there.
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| 8/5/2013 1:10:45 AM |
Living with a terminally ill spouse. |
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sunnydee7777
Clermont, FL
65, joined Aug. 2011
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Hang in there, be kind to yourself too.
It is a rough road and it can get mighty bumpy but we are here for you.
Anytime you need to talk, we are here to listen
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| 8/8/2013 9:22:52 AM |
Living with a terminally ill spouse. |
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cupocheer
Assumption, IL
66, joined May. 2010
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Blessings showered over you, OP.
Because of love ... you will gain strength to bear the burden.
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| 8/8/2013 10:15:32 AM |
Living with a terminally ill spouse. |
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acads
Saint Paul, MN
60, joined Feb. 2011
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My husband was Diagnosed with Glioblastoma. The most aggressive and malignant Brain Cancer. Feeling very alone.
Not sure where you are in the journey but don't ever give up hope, at the same time I think it is important to have realistic expectations. There are a couple of sites that offer support for GBM patients and their caregivers, they are good places to research treatments or just vent, everyone at these sites are going through what you are, anger, frustration, fear, hopelessness.
http://www.cancercompass.com <-- Brain Cancer section
http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/BrainTumor-Treatments/ <-- Mussella Foundation site
I'm sure your life has changed but my recommendation is to enjoy every minute you have with your husband.
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| 8/8/2013 10:41:35 AM |
Living with a terminally ill spouse. |
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barb61270
De Witt, IA
63, joined Nov. 2011
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I was the full-time caretaker for my husband who had bladder cancer. It was a privilege to be there as lover, advocate, and caretaker. My journey covered every emotion of human nature. There were days I was furious that this happened to us, there were times I was grateful for the time we had together, and more. Give yourself permission to take time off and go to lunch with a friend, a walk, or something that nurtures you. It is strange to talk of death and project as to what life as a single person will be like. I admit some days I became very me focused: why me, why now, what did I do this to deserve this. I even prayed for this end more quickly.  This is all part of the journey. Take it one step at a time, remember your love for your husband and reach out for support and help. You will make it through somehow. You and your husband are in my prayers.  
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| 8/8/2013 2:25:23 PM |
Living with a terminally ill spouse. |
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luckylouie42
Cedar Grove, WV
73, joined Mar. 2008
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It is a pretty tough sisuation to be in, but when they are gone, you wont regret doing it for them
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| 8/8/2013 3:35:37 PM |
Living with a terminally ill spouse. |
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gentlebear1949
Apple Creek, OH
66, joined Jul. 2008
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It is a pretty tough sisuation to be in, but when they are gone, you wont regret doing it for them
Having cared for my Parents for five years until their demise,I can honestly say I have never regretted one second of doing so.
Having Hospice definetly helped ease the journey,both mentally and physically......
[Edited 8/8/2013 3:38:37 PM ]
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| 8/9/2013 5:38:57 AM |
Living with a terminally ill spouse. |
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newlady2
Goldsboro, NC
76, joined Apr. 2008
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Yu were lucky cuddly to hav e hospice help.. for Mom I had a nurse stop by once a week.. she had throat and lung cancer.... For my hubb not a soul came bye.. he had Emphysemia and other junk..his legs wouldnt work but I still dont know why except probably weekness. .. I used to touch him in the night---- to make sure he was still breathing. ..
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| 8/9/2013 11:45:00 AM |
Living with a terminally ill spouse. |
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cupocheer
Assumption, IL
66, joined May. 2010
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Very difficult, OP. Very difficult!
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| 8/9/2013 5:19:36 PM |
Living with a terminally ill spouse. |
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cupocheer
Assumption, IL
66, joined May. 2010
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| 8/14/2013 1:34:14 PM |
Living with a terminally ill spouse. |
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ldyinred54
Buford, GA
61, joined Jul. 2013
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My husband was terminal for over a year. He could not walk clean himself bath or anything. I was his soul caregiver. I don't regret a day that I cared for him. I was at his beckon call 24-7. I would stay awake make sure he could breath. We might not been able to be intimate but our love in spirit grew unbelievable strong. He said before he passed he did not realize how much I loved him. You will never regret taking care of them. I would do it again.
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| 8/23/2013 8:39:19 PM |
Living with a terminally ill spouse. |
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older_rh_sc
Rock Hill, SC
54, joined Dec. 2012
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Wife got stage 4 stomach cancer. And all I have to say is that cancer sucks! Feel like I'm watching a slow motion time clock.
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| 8/25/2013 9:55:15 PM |
Living with a terminally ill spouse. |
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missingron
Dadeville, AL
58, joined May. 2009
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Hi folks, back on here after meeting and marrying a wonderful man I met right here on these pages having lost my former husband to a heart condition and he had lost his wife to asthma. Just two weeks ago, I lost him to pancreatic cancer after only three years of marriage. Agree with all of you...Cancer Sucks.
We only had six weeks once his cancer was diagnosed, but we were able to share some wonderful late night heart to heart talks and grew closer in those six weeks than we had been the entire three years. I'm sure he and his late wife and my first late husband are having a great time in Heaven.
Since they were both named Ron, I will keep my old screen name of "missingron".
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| 8/25/2013 10:48:31 PM |
Living with a terminally ill spouse. |
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lovethelake17
Henderson, NV
57, joined May. 2009
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Oh, Missingron, I am so very sorry to read this. You have my heartfelt condolences.
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| 8/25/2013 11:46:04 PM |
Living with a terminally ill spouse. |
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cupocheer
Assumption, IL
66, joined May. 2010
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patience, love, caring, and understanding ........ above all is love
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| 8/25/2013 11:56:52 PM |
Living with a terminally ill spouse. |
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sunnydee7777
Clermont, FL
65, joined Aug. 2011
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missingron...I think you need a very big
Glad you had 2 great men in your life
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| 8/26/2013 11:43:24 PM |
Living with a terminally ill spouse. |
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missingron
Dadeville, AL
58, joined May. 2009
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So sorry to hear this. You have come to the right place. Second occasion for me to be here and I already feel not so alone. We will listen anytime you need to vent ?
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| 8/26/2013 11:45:35 PM |
Living with a terminally ill spouse. |
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missingron
Dadeville, AL
58, joined May. 2009
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Thanx Lovethelake and Sunnydee ?
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| 9/16/2013 8:51:31 PM |
Living with a terminally ill spouse. |
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older_rh_sc
Rock Hill, SC
54, joined Dec. 2012
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Wife stomach cancer has spread to the lungs. Stress has me getting dehydrated. Drinking water. Trying to keep head above water. Wondering about. 3rd time with chemo. It spread during 2nd time. Why does the doc's think third would work? Maybe just let God work?
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| 9/16/2013 10:05:51 PM |
Living with a terminally ill spouse. |
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barb61270
De Witt, IA
63, joined Nov. 2011
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Wife stomach cancer has spread to the lungs. Stress has me getting dehydrated. Drinking water. Trying to keep head above water. Wondering about. 3rd time with chemo. It spread during 2nd time. Why does the doc's think third would work? Maybe just let God work?
Please take care of yourself. You need your strength. You question is one my husband and I ask ourselves. After 6 weeks of chem and then his surgery, the pathology did not have even one dead cancer cell. The Oconologist was shocked and said that none of the chemo was effective. And there was no stronger chemo to be done. The Surgeon demanded Mike agree to more chemo. Mike and I figured the surgeon just could not give up although the evidence said it would be ineffective. The Surgeon, just did not want to lose. (I am not criticizing him just recognize that the Surgeon was continually in a no win situation.) We decided no more chemo. We knew we had to stop the chemo and the surgeries. Mike wanted what strength he had left for being with the one's he loved. We had to continually pray and remind ourselves that Our Creator designed us to die. We finally let go of the dream of eternal life on Earth. older_rh-sc, I wish you and your wife all the best. Whatever decision you make will be the best decision you can make in this moment. You are in my prayers. Peace be with you. As Sunny says = you need a hug.
[Edited 9/16/2013 10:07:08 PM ]
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| 9/16/2013 10:30:07 PM |
Living with a terminally ill spouse. |
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older_rh_sc
Rock Hill, SC
54, joined Dec. 2012
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Thanks. She's going to go to round 3. Even tho rd2 was infective. Oh well. I walk. Gym and work to keep from going stir crazy.
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| 9/16/2013 11:28:43 PM |
Living with a terminally ill spouse. |
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softltouch
Denver, CO
47, joined Sep. 2013
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I pray for you I lived with my husband til he passed it still shocked the socks off me. I did my vows to death do us part but man. His last words though was Irma I love you
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| 10/12/2013 8:02:49 PM |
Living with a terminally ill spouse. |
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older_rh_sc
Rock Hill, SC
54, joined Dec. 2012
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Rd3 and it ain'tlooking so hot. Mon/tTues chemo. Body temp 99.3 sick. Its so sad to watch, and not to show emotions. Trying to keep calm around her and the kid. Sometime Ijust wanna get drunk. But iIknow better. Just a beer every once in a while. Peace y'all.
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| 10/16/2013 6:09:03 PM |
Living with a terminally ill spouse. |
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john1644
Mount Holly, NJ
85, joined Aug. 2011
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wife afflicted with Alzheimer past 8 years. Also, Aortic Aneurysm condition.
Just handle it one day at a time. Never know when the time will come.....
But I know I do my best....
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| 11/14/2013 8:36:57 PM |
Living with a terminally ill spouse. |
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bellaswanstar
Reeds Spring, MO
48, joined Oct. 2013
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Quote from daisybug62: |
| 11/14/2013 10:34:52 PM |
Living with a terminally ill spouse. |
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cupocheer
Assumption, IL
66, joined May. 2010
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The OP has left.
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| 11/22/2013 8:28:02 AM |
Living with a terminally ill spouse. |
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jrupp0604
Stoughton, MA
66, joined May. 2011
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What makes me sad is I thought we were both going to grow old together. But now I go on alone. I have no one to laugh. Hold my hand. Talk to and feel loved by. Those things are so missed.
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| 11/22/2013 8:44:50 AM |
Living with a terminally ill spouse. |
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barb61270
De Witt, IA
63, joined Nov. 2011
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I certainly identify with your comment. I am living my life: spend time with friends, volunteer, and enjoy activities that are offered. Yet I go home alone. Most of the time it is good. I remember being single when I was younger (before marriage) and being alone was not so challenging. Their was the expectation that my love would enter my life. Now I want a new love just do not live believing a new love will magically appear. I just did not understand how lonely widowhood can be. Hugs to you jrupp
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| 3/15/2014 1:16:07 AM |
Living with a terminally ill spouse. |
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rabbit0668
Martin, MI
47, joined Sep. 2012
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Does anyone know how things turned out for Daisybug62? Since my husband died of a rare cancer I can relate to this post so much. The endless rounds of treatments and watching him slowly loosing ground was the hardest thing I have ever done in my life. Blessings to all who have also experienced this road.
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| 3/16/2014 7:28:05 PM |
Living with a terminally ill spouse. |
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older_rh_sc
Rock Hill, SC
54, joined Dec. 2012
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My wife left 1/22/14 after a 2yr cancer battle... once it happens you won't believe how much stress you was under... So live a little. Take a good break. Then get started creating a"new" normal life. It won't be easy, but it's better than sitting at home grieving.
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| 5/1/2014 3:44:34 PM |
Living with a terminally ill spouse. |
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willowwomatic
Willow Springs, MO
63, joined Dec. 2013
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Hello. I'm new to this site, and this forum. I've been widowed since 2004.
He & I found our dream farm together, and moved, lock, stock & barrel from Michigan - a huge undertaking! Less than a year later, he was diagnosed with inoperable lung cancer. He died here, at home. He was my best friend, and oh! How I hated having to watch him die! I was his sole caregiver, with occasional breaks provided by Hospice angels. I could not have done it without Hospice!
Never one to give up, I continue to manage the farm alone, with occasional help from God-sent neighbors. Strong as I consider myself to be, I often still fall prey to loneliness and desolation.
I have many good traits, but some serious strikes against me; my age and my location(very rural). Sorry about the pity party!
I got to thinking that only another widow or widower can truly understand what we've gone through, and continue to experience. Others, of low moral character may see us as victims to be fleeced!
My condolences to all who have suffered this devastating loss.
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| 5/2/2014 9:26:09 PM |
Living with a terminally ill spouse. |
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maviebaby400
Salt Lake City, UT
53, joined Mar. 2014
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I know how it feels my husband died of the same brain tumor in 2011. all you can do is let him know how much you love him and be with him every moment.
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| 5/26/2014 7:34:06 PM |
Living with a terminally ill spouse. |
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john1644
Mount Holly, NJ
85, joined Aug. 2011
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wife ill from Alzheimer 2005 until April 3d, 2014, when she past away. But passing was due to heart failure. I almost forgot the outside world..... Now I have to wait my turn.
Cheers.
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| 5/27/2014 7:01:28 PM |
Living with a terminally ill spouse. |
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newlady2
Goldsboro, NC
76, joined Apr. 2008
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My husband had to fight for breath.... He died of Emphysemia , an awful way to go .
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| 5/28/2014 8:25:05 PM |
Living with a terminally ill spouse. |
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vida60
Norman, OK
55, joined Jul. 2012
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Been there done that...
I've found it much easier to remember the thing we DID do, instead of dwell on the things we didn't get to do.
Wade through the happy memories, instead of dwelling on the way he/she passed.
It's hard to make any sense out of any of it, but, it gets easier all in time, bring a part of him/her into the future with you, meaning, make the life he lived memorable with things that would fight against the disease, such as cancer awareness clubs or pages, get involved in activities that will promote wellness.
No doubt he/she will never be forgotten, nor would they want to be either, you never gave up on his life, so don't give up on his memory, give his memory a chance to help someone else survive.
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| 5/28/2014 8:41:25 PM |
Living with a terminally ill spouse. |
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heart_and_soul2
Sarasota, FL
58, joined Dec. 2013
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^^^^^
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