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8/22/2008 3:09:53 PM Perhaps,women do not want a gentleman afterall?  

appleguybruce
Mount Juliet, TN
age: 40


I get stepped on a lot and I think it is because;I'm a gentleman!I open doors for women,offer them a seat,a drink,and the whole nine yards.I often get words like " that's nice "and they carry on getting a loser or,a 2 by 4 upside the head by a so-called "nice guy".Sometimes it is pretty depressing but,then again I play the violin (air violin)and just move on.I have noticed however after being in Tennessee after 7 or,so months that it is getting old and I'm tired of playing the violin,lol!Just wanted to ask the women here "Are you really searching for a gentleman or,just the loser with the 2 by 4?

8/29/2008 4:10:36 PM Perhaps,women do not want a gentleman afterall?  
spunkycv63
Nashville, TN
age: 63


Well I can only tell you how it works with me...I have always been attracted to the bad boy type...meaning : a little rough around the edges..but not so rough that you cannot go out in public with him..he does not have to open doors for me,this is a definate different time than years ago... I like to be treated with respect but not treated like I have some kind of diability.I learned how to open doors many moons ago.If she wants you to open the door for her..she will stand there and wait for you to do so.Read the signs my friend...

8/29/2008 4:24:18 PM Perhaps,women do not want a gentleman afterall?  

munch1212
Crossville, TN
age: 47


I consider myself very independent but I sppreciate a man who opens doors, pulls out my chair and is a gentleman.

8/29/2008 6:27:33 PM Perhaps,women do not want a gentleman afterall?  

catkell
Kingsport, TN
age: 50


I appreciate a true gentleman myself and will also hold the door for him on occasion if I get to the door first. I do consider myself independent but definitely appreciate a southern gentleman.

8/29/2008 7:20:47 PM Perhaps,women do not want a gentleman afterall?  

trublu5ft2
Columbia, TN
age: 51


Maybe men in tn don't want a real lady. Am from IN but now in TN. Women get treated differently down here in the south and not in a good way... Just my observation

8/29/2008 7:30:18 PM Perhaps,women do not want a gentleman afterall?  

lilybeth
Crossville, TN
age: 49


I know i want a gentleman but one that has a sense of humor,a little cocky without being rude and someone that can hold his own in a argument and not give into everything i want.

8/29/2008 7:32:01 PM Perhaps,women do not want a gentleman afterall?  

lilybeth
Crossville, TN
age: 49


trublu.........i'm also from IN

8/29/2008 7:38:03 PM Perhaps,women do not want a gentleman afterall?  

jennyk4
Russellville, TN
age: 36


Being a Yankee, I have noticed it doesn't matter where you are from, STUPID is always stupid and some women will always want the "bad boys" then regret stepping on the nice guy when it all goes south. Keep your heart guarded but open. She's out there.

8/29/2008 11:09:59 PM Perhaps,women do not want a gentleman afterall?  

throughtime
Knoxville, TN
age: 48


I am one who opens the doors and much much more. For instance fastening the seat belt as I gave a gentle kiss insuring she was safely seated. I was married to a woman whom I wrote poems and gave my all for. I wrote her 365 notes of love one valentine's day. Then the day after I started for the next years valentine jar of 365 notes. Why? Because I loved her with all of my heart. One look in her eyes set my soul to dance. But she left me for a guy at her work who was just chasing after her for one thing. She left when she found out he made 2 1/2 times the money I do. I always thought when you were in love, you took her by the hand and loved with all of your heart. Nothing matters or is above her being happy. But the old saying, if you do not have to work for it, it holds no value, must be true. She knew I was there and she had to do nothing to hold on to me because I loved her so much. But that was seen as a weakness and of no value since she did not have to work at it to hold me. So I think that is why we "nice guys" are seen as real nice, but not desirable. The bad boy is adventurous and a challenge. To win him she has to work at it. Make him want her. Therefore he is valuable since others will take him because she knows he will be available to go unless she can hold onto him. Then she feels good that she was good enough to hold on to him because he was valable in her eyes and therefore she is valuable now. Others want him, but she is good enough to grab and work at holding him. Unfortunately, I am one who when in love, goes dreamy and gets lost in her eyes fighting all hope of rescue. I probably will always loose the woman because I loved her and I do not think I will change. Somewhere there has to be a good woman who sees us type of guys as valuable. I sure they exist. They are either all married, or lived in the 15th century. Sometimes guys, maybe that explains it. We are men in the wrong time. Chivalry is not dead, it just is not desirable anymore to most women. Thats too bad. Their loss. As well as our loss, the two or three of us who still believe in it. (throughtime @ ya hoo.com)



[Edited 8/29/2008 11:15:22 PM]

8/30/2008 1:36:17 AM Perhaps,women do not want a gentleman afterall?  

appleguybruce
Mount Juliet, TN
age: 40


Your valor is true man from knoxville( which I did not get his name)! Even your views on chivalry make mine look pale when compared.I know all these ladies are great to encounter but,I'm still at a loss.I often say now,"that my air violin strings need replacing".How sad is that !I persevere though being stepped on again, and again.I'm thinking about just forgetting the whole thing though!I guess I'm from another time when ladies valued the boldness of man being chil various .I guess those days are truly gone .......

8/30/2008 9:49:11 AM Perhaps,women do not want a gentleman afterall?  

trublu5ft2
Columbia, TN
age: 51


Those days are not gone.. just a lost art. Yep.. times have changed.. but your soul and being need not change with it

9/1/2008 4:18:06 PM Perhaps,women do not want a gentleman afterall?  

mountainman7
Chattanooga, TN
age: 41 online now!


Quote from catkell:
I appreciate a true gentleman myself and will also hold the door for him on occasion if I get to the door first. I do consider myself independent but definitely appreciate a southern gentleman.



Bingo! You just illustrated one major reason why Southern women wouldn't be interested in someone like me. I've lived in the Midwest for most of my life (except for four years, including the past 15 months here). I have noticed there's a regional bias around here that Southern women want Southern men, pure and simple. Doesn't matter which way I look at that issue, it's what usually happens. It's like, "Oh, so you're from the North.. sorry, but I only go out with Southern gentlemen.. they know how to treat Southern women like me." This leaves me with the perception that Southern women aren't my type, because they only want men from this part of the country. If a man is from another part of the country, don't bother asking a Southern woman for a date. That's part of the reason why I made the decision that I wouldn't go on another date with a Southern woman because of the continuous attitudes I get from them about Southern men this and that. Like Southern men are the only type of men that exist. Sounds too closed minded for my thinking. Thank you for addressing the issue about prefering Southern gents. You saved me from being on my soap box more than I did.

After saying all of this, I am at total peace with regard to this issue of dating Southern women. Best wishes to everyone in finding the love of your life!

9/1/2008 6:22:15 PM Perhaps,women do not want a gentleman afterall?  

goodandsweet
Dickson, TN
age: 57


Some of us southern girls are still waiting to find those wonderful men that hold the doors or slip the kisses each time they can. But it seems those very same men look for those younger women who look better on their arms. Either way boys don't change for a woman be yourself, make yourself happy and know you are an honorable man. There are wonderful women out there just looking for someone like you.

9/3/2008 12:41:00 PM Perhaps,women do not want a gentleman afterall?  

tlc4359
Knoxville, TN
age: 51


We love gentlemen, hate 2x4's. We do not like guys who we can walk all over - dominate, if you will. A little self-evaluation might be beneficial - to you.

9/3/2008 12:44:50 PM Perhaps,women do not want a gentleman afterall?  

tlc4359
Knoxville, TN
age: 51


Quote from mountainman7:
Quote from catkell:
I appreciate a true gentleman myself and will also hold the door for him on occasion if I get to the door first. I do consider myself independent but definitely appreciate a southern gentleman.



Bingo! You just illustrated one major reason why Southern women wouldn't be interested in someone like me. I've lived in the Midwest for most of my life (except for four years, including the past 15 months here). I have noticed there's a regional bias around here that Southern women want Southern men, pure and simple. Doesn't matter which way I look at that issue, it's what usually happens. It's like, "Oh, so you're from the North.. sorry, but I only go out with Southern gentlemen.. they know how to treat Southern women like me." This leaves me with the perception that Southern women aren't my type, because they only want men from this part of the country. If a man is from another part of the country, don't bother asking a Southern woman for a date. That's part of the reason why I made the decision that I wouldn't go on another date with a Southern woman because of the continuous attitudes I get from them about Southern men this and that. Like Southern men are the only type of men that exist. Sounds too closed minded for my thinking. Thank you for addressing the issue about prefering Southern gents. You saved me from being on my soap box more than I did.

After saying all of this, I am at total peace with regard to this issue of dating Southern women. Best wishes to everyone in finding the love of your life!


I doubt our preference in men is as narrow minded as you have described. Possibly, you aren't suited to southern women. We are all human beings - just raised a bit different.

By the way - I don't believe for one minute you are at peach with this issue. Your stand was too strong.


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