| 1/2/2013 11:58:13 AM |
Healing in 2013 |
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oceanair777
Reston, VA
53, joined Feb. 2012
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What can you do in 2013 that you didn't do in 2012 to heal. It's one day at a time and one year at a time. Feel free to leave a message, it might help others heal in some sort of way in 2013.
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| 1/4/2013 5:44:10 AM |
Healing in 2013 |
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pingeye2
Savannah, GA
65, joined Jun. 2011
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Speaking from personal experience..if you need to get some help, seek help from Hospice.
You need NOT have to have used their services, to get help from them.
Hospice IS a great organization, and you will get support from them.
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| 1/4/2013 9:22:49 AM |
Healing in 2013 |
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blackribbon
Royal Oak, MI
52, joined Dec. 2012
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What is something I have done in 2013 that I haven't done since he died. I went to the dentist to address the issues I have been ignoring. I guess that means I plan on living...for a lot longer than I hoped for because I finally decided that I want to have my own teeth for the long haul.
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| 1/4/2013 11:45:55 AM |
Healing in 2013 |
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tigbones
Connellsville, PA
57, joined Sep. 2011
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hi yes you are right it does take 1 day at a time to heal.i have not decided yet about what i want to do for 2013. but in 2012 i got my drivers liscense for the first time in my life.i had never had them. my late boyfriend used to drive me anywhere i wanted to go. well after he died i had to do be strong and get through it and learn to drive.if he was here today he would be so proud of me for passing my drivers test.have a good day and happy new year.  
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| 1/4/2013 5:42:21 PM |
Healing in 2013 |
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cupocheer
Assumption, IL
68, joined May. 2010
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Live each day as it comes.
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| 1/12/2013 11:49:05 AM |
Healing in 2013 |
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oceanair777
Reston, VA
53, joined Feb. 2012
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Okay, we have some takers. Hospice is nice. Getting a driver's license and a new teeth.
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| 1/12/2013 2:02:36 PM |
Healing in 2013 |
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lytlemama
Billings, MT
42, joined Aug. 2012
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haul the horse trailer and rv myself lol
my husband always took care of all that stuff now well guess I am just going to have to do it.
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| 1/12/2013 5:49:35 PM |
Healing in 2013 |
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lkibbie
Norco, CA
43, joined Jul. 2012
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Take care of the computer and hopefully don't get a virus..my late husband was awesome with computers and always fixed the problems with my computer.
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| 1/12/2013 7:04:59 PM |
Healing in 2013 |
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nanseeksnew1959
Hudson, NY
58, joined Jan. 2013
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Just taking on the chores he did has been overwhelming at times.
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| 1/13/2013 11:52:31 AM |
Healing in 2013 |
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holdingontolyfe
Woodville, TX
27, joined Jan. 2013
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I lost my boyfriend on christmas eve and I miss him so much I have no clue how to find closure or if it will happen on its own. He didn't have a funeral and I thought that would. Have been brought me closure. I know it just happened recently but I'm happy. I think I know how I'm finding closure but its not rly that healthy so if anyone knows how to find closure? Somebody told me to write a letter to Jonathan and put it in a balloon I'm scared to do it because I don't know how strong I can be but I thought it was a good idea.
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| 1/13/2013 6:47:56 PM |
Healing in 2013 |
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txgal23
Lampasas, TX
65, joined Apr. 2009
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Speaking from personal experience..if you need to get some help, seek help from Hospice.
You need NOT have to have used their services, to get help from them.
Hospice IS a great organization, and you will get support from them.
This is where I got so much of my help..They provide the tools for healing and it's what you do with them that counts..I honestly don't know what would have happened to me had they not been there..I know I sure wasn't thinking right...God bless to all and hugs too
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| 1/14/2013 10:51:17 AM |
Healing in 2013 |
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newdirection6
Wellsville, OH
63, joined Nov. 2007
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Yes, it does take time to heal. My husban has been gone for 6 1/2 years now. I thought I was doee with the crying but it happened last week of how much I miss him. Why you ask??? Well I had to take my mom to the hospital on Jan 7, she had to have emergancy surgry that afternoon. She was taken to the floor my husban died on. She has been on that floor at least 4 times that year. She was always at the end of the hall rooms never close to the room John died in. This time it was way past his room number where he died... it was hard and it brought back so many memories... I had to walk past that room for a week...talk about hell..... I guess we do get through healing but something so small can bring back the past....
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| 1/14/2013 11:37:41 AM |
Healing in 2013 |
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oceanair777
Reston, VA
53, joined Feb. 2012
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I lost my boyfriend on christmas eve and I miss him so much I have no clue how to find closure or if it will happen on its own. He didn't have a funeral and I thought that would. Have been brought me closure. I know it just happened recently but I'm happy. I think I know how I'm finding closure but its not rly that healthy so if anyone knows how to find closure? Somebody told me to write a letter to Jonathan and put it in a balloon I'm scared to do it because I don't know how strong I can be but I thought it was a good idea.
Wow. You're going through a lot right now. There are so many point of views to learn from on widowers site. Sometimes just read others' experiences and maybe you will have something in common with them and it can create a feeling of newness within you. I'm not going to tell you to be strong, "you make the call". Good luck to you in 2013 and beyond!!
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| 1/15/2013 5:37:49 PM |
Healing in 2013 |
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holdingontolyfe
Woodville, TX
27, joined Jan. 2013
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Thanks bunches!!!
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| 1/17/2013 2:45:28 AM |
Healing in 2013 |
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24milkduds
Vallejo, CA
58, joined Mar. 2012
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2012 was a very difficult heartbreaking lonely year w/out my husband and it ended drastically..been getting help with hospice for about 3 months..but this year I just have to try and get my life back and learn to take care of me..so that's my plan...to take care of me, sell my husbands toys so I don't continue to be depressed looking at them..get rid of clutter and hopefully find some happiness..one day at a time is all I can handle..so accepting my faith is what I will try!
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| 1/20/2013 9:17:24 PM |
Healing in 2013 |
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tinkiekitty
Bakersfield, CA
61, joined Jun. 2012
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It's been over three years for me now and I have let things in my house go for so long now!
This is the year I'm gonna get my house back in shape and looking good!
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| 1/20/2013 9:51:17 PM |
Healing in 2013 |
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moonlover515
Selmer, TN
66, joined Jan. 2013
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It's been over three years for me now and I have let things in my house go for so long now!
This is the year I'm gonna get my house back in shape and looking good!
I have been doing that too, started with my bathroom and this past week, I have been working painting my living room. It helps some to keep busy, the night time is what is so hard.
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| 1/21/2013 1:43:43 AM |
Healing in 2013 |
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tinkiekitty
Bakersfield, CA
61, joined Jun. 2012
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Yes nights are the worst for me too Moon.
I have given some of my husbands tools and personal items to family and friends but need to go through clothes and start donating them. I have recently bagged up several bags of clothes but just can't quite get them out the door into my van....I don't know what is stopping me!
I've had a new roof, ac/furnace unit and new appliances put in my house and have done a lot of repairs that I had let go for years because my husband was sick for 15 years and the last 3 years he was terminal and I spent so much time running back in forth to the hospital that was over 125 miles away.
I love my home and want to take pride in it again like before my husband got so sick. I just feel like I'm in a fog.
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| 1/23/2013 11:42:42 AM |
Healing in 2013 |
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24milkduds
Vallejo, CA
58, joined Mar. 2012
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^^^^thats how I feel like I'm always in a fog..my counselor told me that I was probably afraid of learning to be alone and take care of me since I've always taking care of others most of my life...I had to soak that in..she is right in so many ways..but still I miss my husband terribly..we had a wonderful life and I'm afraid i may never be blessed with another...
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| 1/23/2013 11:10:26 PM |
Healing in 2013 |
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birdmanbiker
La Vista, NE
63, joined Nov. 2012
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New here,My SHORT story. Working overnights I would call my wife on my 2:00am lunch. Phone by her head. Called 22 times. No answer. Worried,went to check on her. Oh,alright,just sleeping hard. go back to work. Home 3 1/2 hrs later, she was gone. TOTALLY UNEXPECTED! No ongoing illness. I'll never get the image of her cloudy fixed eyes out of my mind.Healing in 2013? I've checked on Grief groups, all want $$$. Can't even get support without paying for it.
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| 1/23/2013 11:45:52 PM |
Healing in 2013 |
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24milkduds
Vallejo, CA
58, joined Mar. 2012
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New here,My SHORT story. Working overnights I would call my wife on my 2:00am lunch. Phone by her head. Called 22 times. No answer. Worried,went to check on her. Oh,alright,just sleeping hard. go back to work. Home 3 1/2 hrs later, she was gone. TOTALLY UNEXPECTED! No ongoing illness. I'll never get the image of her cloudy fixed eyes out of my mind.Healing in 2013? I've checked on Grief groups, all want $$$. Can't even get support without paying for it.
Your local Hospice...they offer FREE grief counseling!!!! Call. And sorry for your loss
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| 1/24/2013 12:03:50 PM |
Healing in 2013 |
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happyg1
Morganton, NC
50, joined Aug. 2012
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Windbiker and all that have lost loved ones soory for your lose.... May God be with each and everyone of us. I lost my love of 28years this past August the 20th past 5 months I've lived in a fog an going in circles with my emotions not knowing what to do with myself stirring clear of making any new friends, simply for the fear of loosening them.... I've come to a conclusion that I am only hurting myself by doing that.... Last week I was put on depression medicine that is slowly given me my life back... Don't know if that's a cover up or actually helping me to deal with life's stress without Roy being present anymore...... But this year I'm gonna start dealing more with making friends and try to get my life back.... Gonna be the hardest thing to do but I know God is on my side..... As well as all that turn to him......and even for the ones that don't he is there 
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| 1/24/2013 1:00:07 PM |
Healing in 2013 |
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oceanair777
Reston, VA
53, joined Feb. 2012
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New here,My SHORT story. Working overnights I would call my wife on my 2:00am lunch. Phone by her head. Called 22 times. No answer. Worried,went to check on her. Oh,alright,just sleeping hard. go back to work. Home 3 1/2 hrs later, she was gone. TOTALLY UNEXPECTED! No ongoing illness. I'll never get the image of her cloudy fixed eyes out of my mind.Healing in 2013? I've checked on Grief groups, all want $$$. Can't even get support without paying for it.
Welcome. Such a tragedy and a lot of being spared. Wow, what can I actually say? I hope that healing finds you as the miracle of healing has found others. Miracles are always around the corner and every gray cloud has a silver lining. Just believe you can.
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| 1/26/2013 10:20:37 AM |
Healing in 2013 |
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oceanair777
Reston, VA
53, joined Feb. 2012
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It's been over three years for me now and I have let things in my house go for so long now!
This is the year I'm gonna get my house back in shape and looking good!
That sounds like a positive idea. I got rid of a lot of things also. There's no forward progress holding on to physical and emotional thoughts within. Good luck to you and enjoy 2013!!
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